None of this makes sense. I do not appreciate this at all.

Oh, come on. Seriously? If God was going to take me somewhere, why couldn't it at least be somewhere with easy access to a webcam? I can't blog like this. Plus, you know, I was totally in the middle of something nefarious.

Balls.

OHMYGOODUHNESS

SEVERUS.

That photo of you? Looking like, TOTALLY smug and stuff? It TOTALLY turned out! You're like, even SMILING! HEEEEEEE! LOOK!



... you never did say WHY you were like, SO totez happy that morning, though.

( Severus )

( Severus )

Jamie? Are you...? Where...? where is She, She was just here! She was going to hurt Harriet

What happened? Where's Harriet?

( To God, but Severus can also view it )

This isn't Hogsmeade.

... this isn't 1978.

Severus -

Not everything HAS to be pink.

Thank you for being my friend. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

♥ ♥ ♥ Barbie

[the note is tacked to |this|, which is in a black Neiman Marcus box.]

So let me get this straight. I'm in a world run by... God. There is a Snape here, in a younger body, but with all of his memories. And there's another Snape here, but in the form of a woman. I think I just threw up a little bit in my mouth. Professor Dumbledore is here, but he's also in a younger body, with all of his memories.

Ron is here, I think Hermione is still here. I have... a son here. And Draco and his son are here.

And we can use this godbox thing to travel places, instead of just Apparating.

Did I miss anything crazy?

Okay, seriously, I figured I wait until after the full moon, because that's a lot to deal with. And I think this is a long enough time.

Are we going to talk about what happened two weeks ago?

Because, fuck Remus, I need to know what that was about.

Remus - so, after... how many people leave this place...

You know you have been here a year, does Gigi love you as much as she loves me?

Come get me so we can get drinks so I can stop drinking alone.

Bloody hell.

Moony is a pretty bird. SNAPE is a pretty bird.

I HAD BETTER DAMN WELL BE PRETTY!

Stupid alternate universes.

Current Mood: NOT AMUSED

This isn't what I expected.

One might think the afterlife would be less...like life was.

I have been completely bored the last few days and it needs to change.

( Damien )

( Scorpius )

( Hermione )

( Severus )

Happy birthday, Dad.

I. . .seem to have mistaken a portkey for the Brandy. . .again.

Uh, hello? Can anyone be so kind as to tell me. . .where I am? And where the nearest portkey is so I can go home?

Much obliged.

Kay, party at the Grand to celebrate my first year here like a week prematurely.

Cookies and blowjobs, as well as booze and chronic to anyone that shows.

Bring food. We're gonna need tons.

Oh.My.God! That is all I really have to say. Someone needs to help turn off my brain. It is torturing me. I keep thinking about - Oh bloody hell - both.

I can't believe I did that.

I put the lime in the coconut but I do not think I did it correctly; nothing of interest occurred.