monstermatch: in character

A delightful young woman wearing just a little too much makeup approached me as I stood on a street corner last night. She asked me if I would like to have a little fun, and then told me how much it would cost up front. I told her I admired her enterprising spirit, but hell no, I haven't paid for sex since the Ripper made headlines in London. Something about that must have spooked her, because it's been a while since I've seen a woman run so fast in heels in person. Silly human, I was only implying a connection there. I'm not actually Jack.

Oh, Vegas. I've missed you. It's good to be back.

you know what I love about las vegas?

how absolutely mundane and repetitive it is, yet people never fail to keep on coming back for more of the same old things. but this world has always been filled to the brim with the easy to please. you give the promise of alcohol, money, and sex and theyll be swarming at your doorstep like a penny whore.

well, unless they happen to be nuns, but id found a solution to that particular problem centuries ago.

One of my clients decided to get me this as a gift after seeing it on Shark Tank. Then they hid my real phone, on silent, so this was all I had left. Some people think they're so funny. And if I don't get it back 10 minutes ago, some people are going to have to plan their own funeral. Closed casket.

WHO: Preston and Open
WHAT: A Dream
WHEN: After the Booze Cruise
WHERE: Fireworks, outside (duh), in a park.
WARNINGS: Added as needed; open to multiples.

( We should have brought hot chocolate... )

I still don't understand birthday's on this plane. They're very odd and I've been here for over 300 years and it never ceases to amaze me what a big deal they're done up to be. My assistant brought me balloons. My accountant sent over a 'cookie bouquet'. Michael your office sent a box of chocolates (I know they weren't from you specifically because you'd never get me milk chocolate). I got three voicemail, and 10 text messages this morning.

One of the places I went to once for a meal, emailed this morning giving me a 'free meal for my birthday' if I bring six friends with me to eat...

I don't even think I know six people I'd want to eat with. Not even for bringing with me just to get myself a free meal.

When they start giving you a car on your birthday, then maybe I'll be interested. Until then, it's all junk mail to me.

Humans, why do you celebrate your birthdays? It's just a marking that you're going to be dying just that much sooner.

Lined up what would have been the greatest gig in this actor's career so far, and the idiot blew it because he got so drunk last night that he slept straight through the audition and every single attempt I made to reach him. Now I have to butter up the casting director to give him another shot, and he and I have history.

Looking for suggestions for some quick stress relief besides biting out someone's throat literally. "Sex" is the obvious answer, so unless you're offering, something more clever is preferred.

[PUBLIC BY BORNYESTERDAY]
Apparently there are many kinds of burger and places? Who knew.

Tell me, monstermatch, where do I go? I'm new at this and the people at this In-N-Out are looking at me funny when I come here all the time. Might be the horns but I doubt it.

I'm not so free with sharing my name. Some of you already know me, unfortunately for you, and for the rest, I'm [showtime]. I'm not on this site for me, but I won't complain if I get something out of it. I don't live in Vegas full time. I have a place there, but I spend more time in LA, and almost all of it working. In case that somehow wasn't obvious in my profile.

Fine, icebreaker Name your favorite kind of coffee or other caffeinated beverage. If you don't drink caffeine, we might not get along name whatever your favorite boring drink is.

How do you do, Vegas? Some of you may already know me. My name's Michael. I was turned onto this site by the speed dating event it hosted the other week. This isn't my first experience with online dating, but I'm hoping it will be the best.

A little about me: I moved here from Chicago a few years back to set up shop at a new branch of my law firm, but I was born in the Caribbean Sea. I'd generally consider myself a nice person outside of the courtroom, unless you cut me off in traffic and slam on the brakes. I'm an entirely different, very angry person when I'm surrounded by bad drivers.

Backdated to Monday Night, After the Wedding
( private [sanswit] from [gentlemancollar] )

It's been a while since I've played a game of high stakes poker. Usually it's invite only, but I thought I'd branch out a bit. Anyone interested?

WHO: Genevieve [mundanejane], Charles [nursewolfy], and open because why not (shoutout to Kenna [kweenkillstreak], Gabe [habibi] and Preston [gentlemancollar] as this progresses)
WHERE: Florida Cafe Cuban Bar & Grill, then A Little White Wedding Chapel
WHAT: Wedding, Vegas-style
WHEN: Monday night
WARNING: Drunkenness, shenanigans
( What do you say we get out of here and go do this thing? )

WHO: Cassie [humancondition] and Preston [fraw]
WHERE: Cassie’s place
WHAT: Making dinner and failing.
WHEN: Sunday March 20th / 2016, Evening
WARNINGS: Kissing/Romance/SUPER!Fluff
STATUS: Complete

( Ready )

So... are we supposed to sit here and hope someone sees your ad and goes "OH HAY LOOKIT THIS BABE!" or are we allowed to pimp ourselves out a little?

I hope it's the latter, cos... here we go!

So, anyone interested in a date? I admit, I'm a huge spaz and tend to trip over my own two feet and ramble about ridiculous things. But! I'm also very fun, very spontaneous, and always willing to try new things.

Guys, girls, it doesn't matter. I'm just tired of being lonely.

I tried out one of the mystery flavor Peeps, so you could say I'm pretty adventurous. It tasted like buttered popcorn. Dnw. I'll be going back to the simply labeled and originals, ty. Unless anyone's tried either of the other two and they're good, no trolling?

So hi, Monster Matchers. I'm easybreezy and I'm not new to Vegas, but I'm new to the site. I almost went with pixielated because of my degree program, and I can't help but wonder if I made the right choice. I guess we'll never know and it will haunt me forever. It's totally not weird to be on the same site as my boss and cousins or anything. No siree. I just got out of my post-relationship blues so now I'm back to looking around, and the internet works best for me because I've got a habit of making a fool of myself in person. Pity the fool. Talk to me.

I'm not really a fan of the latest episode of Criminal Minds, even if it did have a gratuitous amount of shirtless Derek Morgan and an appearance by Danny Glover. Morcia forever.

private to [nursewolfy] from [mundanejane]
On a scale from "who are you again?" to "I notice other people so little I run into them regularly," how exclusive would you say we are?

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!

ghostbusters with vaginas? i'm not sure why this took so long but my ass is definitely going to be in that theater.

WHO: Henny [hennypenny] & Preston [gentlemancollar]
WHERE: Preston's
WHAT: A King and Queen meeting of the minds.
WHEN: After this!
WARNING: Some strong language.

( Long live the pioneers, rebels and mutineers. Go forth and have no fear. )

So, anyone having any luck with this place? I'm feeling a bit like the odd witch out.

So... I feel like I may have made a bad or at least weird impression on some of you.

Look. I'm really not a bad or weird guy (aside from being a blood-sucking creature of the night, but hey, nobody's perfect). I just have some really bad social awkwardness. I basically go to one of two extremes if I meet someone I like: either I clam up and don't say a word, or I try to be sweet and end up coming off completely forward and pushy.

So... if I weirded anyone out, I apologize.