InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Shut up."

Faith Lehane (secondxbest) wrote in makebelievenet,
@ 2013-03-23 00:01:00

Entry tags:

anakin skywalker, buffy summers, clint barton, duncan (total drama), faith lehane, james rogers, nyota uhura, tony stark

Fuck.
Shit.
Damn.
Ugh...

Some days are better than others. The second time around isn't getting any easier. The process seems harder for some reason. Like it's getting dragged out. Punishing me for taking the steps back.

Is there an anti-drug for this? Anyone know if I can get some morphine for this?

Fuck.
Those Reavers.
I shouldn't have gotten so

Damn it!

I need a distraction. Someone give me a distraction. Distract me goddammit!

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secondxbest
2013-03-23 04:39 am UTC (link)

Ugh. Neub. I don't have the patience right now.

But fine. Long story short? Reavers invaded before you showed up. Alien, chemically insane humans who eat, rape, and kill others; and blah, blah, blah. You don't have to worry about them anymore. They're gone. I helped fight them, but I...fuck. I enjoyed it. It felt so good. To fight and kill them. It was exciting. I felt so alive. I haven't felt that way in a while.

Damn. I need more cigs.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nyota_uhura 2013-03-23 04:41 am UTC (link)
	So the process of coming down from adrenaline and being used to a rush is harder, or the process of backing away from fighting and killing? Or is there another detail bothering you? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	secondxbest 2013-03-23 04:43 am UTC (link)
	I wish it was adrenaline. Who the hell are you, anyway? And why are you so interested in my addictions? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nyota_uhura 2013-03-23 04:46 am UTC (link)
	I'm a new castle resident. I think anyone would be interested if there's a problem. If you don't wish to talk about it to people, why post about it and ask for distractions? Why ask for help if you don't want it? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

secondxbest
2013-03-23 04:48 am UTC (link)

Yeah I got that. Thanks. Got a name to go with it?

I do wish to talk about it to people. Obviously, or I wouldn't have posted it. I was hoping for answers to the morphine question, or a distraction with the four people around here that actually give a shit about me. I've never spoken to you before and I'm wondering what you supposedly think you can do to help.

I'm so on anxious and on edge right now. I feel like my brain is trying to burst out of my skull.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nyota_uhura 2013-03-23 04:52 am UTC (link)
	My name is Uhura. What's yours? I don't know what I can do to help, if anything, if I don't know what the problem is. But if I can help, I will. I don't have access to medical supplies, if you're injured, but surely someone around here does or has a way to get you appropriate medical assistance. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	secondxbest 2013-03-23 04:59 am UTC (link)
	I'm Faith. You'll hate me once you know. Maybe this isn't the best way for us to first talk. Any idea of where I can get morphine without some kind of a doctor's note. Or whatever. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nyota_uhura 2013-03-23 05:06 am UTC (link)
	You don't know me and are already assessing if I'll hate you? If you don't wish to talk this way first, that's your decision, but do try to accept the help of those you mentioned. It seems like they're already around and trying to help. No, I don't. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	secondxbest 2013-03-23 05:12 am UTC (link)
	I wasn't a good person. I'm bad and good people don't usually approve of the things I've done. ... I get a drug-like euphoria from killing and torturing others. That's just the surface of how fucked up I am. Now tell me you don't hate me. I dare you. I'd steal it if I wasn't so afraid I'd do something. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	nyota_uhura 2013-03-23 05:38 am UTC (link)
	If you're aware they were wrong and are seeking to change from that path, that's an important step. I don't hate you. I think you need help, but I don't hate you. Don't steal it, then. Seek other methods, or help, to avoid doing something. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	secondxbest 2013-03-23 06:34 pm UTC (link)
	I guess so. Well, that's a first. I'm just staying in my current home right now. I'm afraid to go out. Maybe tomorrow will be an easier day. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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