InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "It's wingardium leviOsa"

daisy johnson (neverfit) wrote in wariscomingcom,
@ 2015-02-21 00:41:00

Entry tags:

!welcome committee, bobbi morse, buffy summers, grant ward, jemma simmons, myka bering, natasha barton / black widow, phil coulson, scorpius malfoy, skye, vicki donovan

With Lois gone, I'm taking over the welcoming committee stuff. We could use a few more people, if anyone's interested, since we lost a few other people. It'd be good to have three people on each team and maybe some alternates.

Building: Skye, Seth, Cami, Mona, Myka

Team 1: Rose, Sydney, Lissa
Team 2: Faith, Kirk, Buffy, Gamora
Team 3: Jack, Alaric, Ward, Vicki
Team 4: Thea, Natasha, Ariel, Scorpius
Team 5: Giles, Oliver, Marcel, Bobbi

Monday: Team 1
Tuesday: Team 2
Wednesday: Team 3
Thursday: Team 4
Friday: Team 5
Saturday: alternate weekends (Team 1,2,3)
Sunday: alternate weekends (Team 4,5)

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-23 09:36 pm UTC (link)
	Loving someone isn't a weakness, Ward. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-23 09:40 pm UTC (link)
	I told him about your cellist. Did you know that? Because she was your weakness (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Coulson | Ward.

disappointeddad
2015-02-23 09:45 pm UTC (link)

It makes sense considering the things that Raina knew when they abducted me. Dinners at the Richmond and listening to her play were too specific for someone who didn't know me at all.

Loving someone isn't a weakness. It may give others something to use against you, but you can't close yourself off entirely to friends, family, love, just to assure that you're free from manipulation. That's no way to live.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-23 09:50 pm UTC (link)
	It was something we could use. How do you think Daniels got free? What're you trying to do? Convince me he was wrong? I know what he did Coulson. But its done. Its over. Which means we can forget it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-23 09:55 pm UTC (link)
	To distract me. Because if I was distracted, you had an opportunity to get all of the information that Skye had safeguarded. I can see that angle, Ward. It makes perfect sense, and let's be completely honest, it worked like a charm. Or I could not. Because I know what you're capable of, whatever you might want to pretend. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-23 09:59 pm UTC (link)
	It did. And we knew it would. We both know what I'm capable of. What does that matter now (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-23 10:04 pm UTC (link)
	Because caring isn't a bad thing, Ward. And maybe if I'd been a little less focused on survival and more on caring, things wouldn't have gone the way that they did the last few months. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-23 10:10 pm UTC (link)
	But they did go that way. Why be so focused on something you can't change? Its done, its over. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-23 10:12 pm UTC (link)
	Things aren't done until we're dead, Ward. Until then, we might not be able to change what's already happened, but we can make up for it if we're willing to try. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-23 10:14 pm UTC (link)
	I guess we start with that meeting. And that trust. But I don't want to talk about John. Okay? I told you the story. Its done. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-23 10:16 pm UTC (link)
	Well, that's good. Cause I don't really want to talk about him either. You can only have so many people you ~~love~~ care about stab you in the back until it gets a little unbearable. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-23 10:20 pm UTC (link)
	I think you mattered. Or he'd never have bothered trying to get you onside. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-23 10:22 pm UTC (link)
	We were friends since I was eighteen. There were plenty of missions early on that he was the only reason I survived. Plenty of others where I was the only reason he did. I thought I knew him better. I thought I knew them all better. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Coulson | Ward.

notanazi
2015-02-23 11:07 pm UTC (link)

I won't insult you by saying I know what thats like, I don't. Friends were an accsessory when I was a kid and a weakness the rest of the time.

But I think maybe its what they thought of me. Fitzsimmons and Skye I mean, that they thought they knew me better.

That was kind of the point though wasn't it. Hide in plain sight, out of the shadows and all that overdramatic crap.

I think before he was hurt, before it all went wrong, it was very different for him.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-23 11:49 pm UTC (link)
	I know that's what I thought. We all thought you were with us up until we found Koenig. We had no reason to doubt you. You'd been nothing but loyal, dependable, and considerate. But I guess that was kind of the point. And if we'd gotten to him soon enough, we might have been able to do something about it. But what's done is done. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Coulson | Ward.

notanazi
2015-02-24 07:37 am UTC (link)

I needed to keep my cover long enough to get Skye out of there. Its why he had to die. It was quick it was messy and I should have known I didn't clean up well enough. But I didn't do it for kicks. Him, Hand, it was because I had to. That's it.

I did care. Thats what's messed up. I cared enough to use the medpod rather than crossing Fitzsimmons off. I cared enough to make sure Skye didn't get hurt.

In the end I guess it didn't matter

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Coulson | Ward.

disappointeddad
2015-02-24 06:54 pm UTC (link)

It was sloppy, disorganized, certainly not what I would have expected out of an agent whose first instinct was to cross someone off. Panicked is probably the word I would have picked if anyone had asked me to describe it. So I've no doubt it was tactical, forced and unexpectedly so.

When the orders can't be countermanded, alter the plan to obtain the objective result you want while still maintaining the spirit of what you were told to do. It's an old trick.

Caring always matters, Ward. Even when the people you care about are too hurt and angry to realize it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-24 06:59 pm UTC (link)
	I didn't want a body count. So maybe it was sloppy. I thought maybe they'd float, get help. They'd live and I'd deal with it later. I didn't know what would happen to Fitz. That said, it's still on me. I know that too. That's not how I was taught. Its the opposite (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Coulson | Ward.

disappointeddad
2015-02-24 07:07 pm UTC (link)

Few people ever want a body count. And if I'm honest, I'd wager mine is higher than yours, anyway.

Yeah. I watched the footage of your conversation with Fitz after we got back. And I guess the pod was designed to in the event of a water landing. You might have made the choice to do what you did. But I can't hold you responsible for an equipment malfunction. The choice, the result, but not the intent.

Forget what you were taught, what you might feel obligated to. Which way would you rather do things?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-24 07:14 pm UTC (link)
	You know, no one asked me that till Skye. Who I'd rather be? I still don't know. There are so many versions of me even I'm not sure who the real Grant Ward is most of the time. I want to be someone she deserves (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-24 07:19 pm UTC (link)
	Real is a hard term to define for us, for spies. We have to wear so many masks, it ends up getting convoluted even in the most self-assured people. It's all right not to know. But you really should be doing this for yourself, Ward. Not for her. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-24 07:23 pm UTC (link)
	There's nothing I need for myself (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-24 07:26 pm UTC (link)
	What about want? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. notanazi 2015-02-24 07:28 pm UTC (link)
	First it was a way out of the life I had, then it was making sure I didn't disappoint John. Then it was Skye. Now, I guess I haven't thought about it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Coulson \| Ward. disappointeddad 2015-02-24 07:31 pm UTC (link)
	Try to, maybe? It might help you figure out the rest of it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)