InsaneJournal

WHO: Molly Hooper & Khan
WHAT: Molly's had a bad day and decided to get drunk and brood over her love life...completely forgetting she'd invited Khan over that evening. Oops?
WHEN: Tuesday evening, around 6
WHERE: Molly's apartment
RATING: Probably low, but not entirely sure
STATUS: Closed; Incomplete

When she had woken up this morning she'd been excited. She had gotten very lucky in that there had been a problem with the building where her classes were going to be held so she hadn't actually missed teaching any of her classes while she had been gone at Hogwarts. So she had woken up excited to do what she'd been wanting to do ever since it was presented as a possibility. She'd gotten dressed with care, gotten her lesson plans together and made her way to the university. Classes themselves had gone swimmingly, to be honest. The students were bright and inquisitive, and they seemed quite eager to learn what she had to teach. She'd had one class in the morning and one in the afternoon, and had just finished her second class when her day took a turn for the worse. When she had returned from Hogwarts she'd had ten messages from Jason on her phone, and instead of calling him back she had ignored them, because he seemed to have gotten the hint and not left a message for a week now. It wasn't until she saw Jason standing outside her classroom that she realized that maybe he hadn't.

She had tried to give him an excuse but he kept insisting they at least have coffee, and finally she sighed and agreed. They made their way to the cafeteria and he bought a coffee while she had tea. Once they sat down he asked her why she hadn't called, why she'd dropped off the face of the earth. She told him business had called her away from town and she'd just gotten back. He asked her if everything was all right and she said it was fine; there was no real way to tell him she'd been turned into an eleven-year-old and sent off to a school for witches and wizards without him thinking she was mental. It went on for a few more minutes before he finally got to his point: would she like to have dinner with him tonight? She was quiet for a minute as she thought. He was pleasant, and she had liked that, but there hadn't been a real connection. And while knowing someone was interested in her was a far sight better than hoping someone else was interested in her she wasn't attracted to Jason, and it wasn't right to string someone along who she didn't care for. So with that in mind, she said no, she wasn't interested, and that perhaps it would be best if he didn't ask again.

He looked a bit shell-shocked at her refusal. She barely knew the man; one conversation at an airport and an hour long dinner wasn't really all that much time to get to know someone, and surely it shouldn’t have come as a surprise, considering she hadn’t spoken to him for almost three weeks. And then he looked at her and he got angry. He told her it wasn't right that he offered her a date and she turned him down. He had been nice and she owed him a chance. She stared at him, slightly slack jawed as other people in the cafeteria turned and began paying attention to them. Did he really think she owed him a date? As far as she knew, that wasn't the way dating worked. She had replied that no, she didn't owe him anything, and if this was going to be the way he acted she was certainly glad she wasn't giving him a chance. He had stood up quite suddenly and pushed the chair he’d been in towards the table with some force, which caused her to jump slightly, and said quite loudly that he hoped she realized what she was missing out on, because she was making the wrong choice by not choosing him. And then he left, leaving her at the table by herself to stew over what had to have been one of the most surreal situations in her life that wasn't related to Seal shenanigans. After a few seconds she realized everyone was staring and, mortified, she scurried away from the cafeteria.

She decided to make a detour to the market and buy a bottle of wine. She debated inviting Livvy over, but really, this was a night where she just needed to stew over her absolutely horrid love life and drink and just ignore the world. She made sure the bottle of wine was chilled so she could start drinking the minute she got back to her apartment, and once she let herself in the door and put her things away she went and did just that, taking a large glass to her chair and sitting down in it, thinking. She hadn't exactly been a popular girl growing up; she'd never been a beauty of any sort and her interest in science had firmly stuck her in the “nerd” side of things for most of her life. She'd watched all the other girls flirt and get noticed and have dates and she'd thrown herself into her studies as she tried not to get jealous. This went all the way through university and medical school, and then one day she had graduated and she didn't have studies to throw herself into anymore. She applied at a few places and when she got accepted to St. Bart's she had vowed to make a fresh start. Try and be social, have a life that involved more than just a random hook-up that left her disappointed. She knew she didn't need to be in a relationship to be happy, but she also knew it wouldn't hurt.

And then she met Sherlock Holmes. Oh, the way she had pined after him. And he could always be quite cruel towards her. Sometimes she thought he didn't mean to, that he was that way with everyone, and what made her special? Other times she thought he singled her out. Really, she knew she deserved better. She knew she deserved someone who treated her with respect and was kind to her and actually thought of her feelings every once in a while. And he didn't do any of that, yet she still fancied him. It was quite pathetic, she knew it, but she couldn't stop.

When Jim had flirted with her she'd actually been flattered. He'd seemed sweet and charming, the opposite of Sherlock. She'd gone out on a date with him and had an enjoyable time. That date had led to another, and then she'd introduced him to Sherlock. Yes, it was partly to make Sherlock jealous, and knowing Sherlock she should have known it wouldn't work. But part of it had also been to show Sherlock that someone actually did take notice of her, and that he would miss out on something if he wasn't smart enough to see her as more than a tool to be used. But that part had gone over his head too, and just left her more dejected than anything else. Jim asked her out on one more date, but at the end of it she knew it wouldn't work out, and so she said they shouldn't see each other anymore. They went their separate ways, and that was the end of it. She didn't realize the bullet she had dodged. She didn't know Jim was actually James Moriarty, the man behind the murder Sherlock had tried to solve when he was a child, the man behind the bombs on people...she'd been completely clueless. Sherlock had told her, of course, and she was stunned at how well Moriarty had pulled the wool over her eyes.

And then things continued until the Christmas party. That moment, when she had finally stood up to Sherlock about how he treated her, that had been a moment that changed their relationship. She didn't know the full extent until quite some time later, when Sherlock said that she counted, that she had always counted. To know that she had mattered to him had been something she had longed to hear and never thought she would. After he fell, after he stayed at her home for a time before he left to clean up Moriarty's mess, she actually got to know him, and she realized that, perhaps, he was a good man after all. And then he was gone. She'd had to move on at that point, had to pretend she didn’t know the truth. And she did, after a few months, and that was when Tom had appeared in her life.

Tom was actually quite nice. Yes, there was a lot about him that reminded her of Sherlock; she wouldn't deny that was part of the attraction. But he was nice, and while it took her a bit of time not to be wary, to think he had an ulterior motive like Moriarty had had, once she accepted it she decided to take a chance on him. It had actually been quite nice, being loved, being happy. She had never really thought she would ever have that happen. But deep down, part of her wished it had been Sherlock. She knew it made her a horrible person, but she felt that way all the same. When Tom proposed she said yes, that same part of her knew she would probably never be completely happy, especially if Sherlock returned, which she knew was going to be inevitable unless he was killed doing what he needed to do. And then Sherlock was back, and she knew even if she had stayed in London and hadn't been taken by the Seal that things were going to be over between her and Tom at some point. It only took the awkward conversations at 221B Baker Street to show her. But she didn't have long to think about it; she'd stepped outside to get a bit of fresh air and found herself in a graveyard in Kansas a few months after when she'd stepped outside the door.

It had taken adjusting. She was quite thankful Mary and John were there. It had helped to have familiar faces, people that understood, even if Mary came from a later point in her life and John came from an earlier one. And she quite enjoyed life in Lawrence; she got to meet people she never would have met, do things she never would have dreamed doing before. Harry and Livvy were as dear to her as anyone she was friends with in London, and despite a few missteps along the way she'd settled into a life here in Lawrence that she enjoyed. She accepted that it was in her best interest not to pine after Sherlock, to move on from a relationship Mary had confirmed would end eventually anyway, and just start fresh here in Lawrence.

The one thing she had not factored in, however, was there being a Sherlock facetwin in this town. She had certainly not expected to have Khan become one of her friends, when they had first started speaking on the boards. And she had most definitely never expected to fancy the man. She knew anyone who knew her, either this her or the old her who had been in Lawrence before, would automatically assume she fancied Khan simply because he looked and sounded like Sherlock. And even she would admit, that was a small part of it. But it was a very small part. After the first dinner she had cooked for him she had started to get to know him. The more she got to know him the more she liked him, the more she wanted to spend time with him. And slowly she started to hope that maybe, possibly, he might actually fancy her a bit, too, but he never said anything of the sort to her so she kept her feelings on the matter quiet.

When everyone else had come back after the Seal took them and she hadn't heard anything from him she had tried so very hard not to panic. If the Seal took him back to where he was from she would have regretted not telling him how she really felt about him. And then he came on the boards and she was so relieved that he was back. It was like she had been holding her breath in anticipation of bad news and instead of getting that could let out a sigh of relief. They'd made plans for supper the next day, and it had gone well enough, but she'd chickened out on telling him. She was an absolute coward, no matter how much she didn't want to be, and knowing that coupled with the experience she'd had with Jason that afternoon had just put her in a mood to have wine and brood for a while.

She was more than halfway through her third glass and debating whether to top it off when she heard a knock on her door. She frowned to herself. She wasn't supposed to be expecting anyone tonight, was she? She thought she wasn't. And then her eyes widened as she finally remembered. She had invited Khan over for supper. There was a 99% chance he was the one knocking at her door, and not only did she not have anything for supper she was already more than a bit tipsy. This was not going to end well, she could tell. What she wanted to do was pretend she wasn't home, let him leave and then tell him later she'd forgotten and could they meet up another time? But that wasn't fair to him. She set her glass on the counter and went to the door, opening it. As she saw Khan standing there she knew, deep down, that this was going to be an interesting evening, and probably not in a good way. She just hoped they were still friends by the end of it.