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michael corner is reluctantly growing up ([info]mlcorner) wrote in [info]pandorarpg,
@ 2011-12-26 22:12:00

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Entry tags:!status: complete, ^date: november 09 2003, character: lavender brown, character: michael corner

Characters: Lavender Brown & Michael Corner
Setting: Lavender's flat, 9 November 2003, 2:31pm
Rating: General Public
Summary: Catching Lavender up on the meeting & getting free baked goods.

Michael wasn't sure if he felt good about the meeting or not. They had discussed plenty of things and learned loads from all different sources, but there had been confrontation and not many had considered some of what he said to be realistic, which he had expected, but being the dutiful not-boyfriend that he was, he had still said it. He wanted to give Lavender a full account of what all had happened, but he had a feeling she wasn't going to like all of it. Hopefully he could put that part off for a while.

Michael knocked on her door rather than trying to enter through the roof, though at least he had been extended an invitation this time. So maybe that meant that he wouldn't be expecting anything to be thrown at him, not that he wouldn't put it past Lavender to turn the tables on him at any moment. He waited for her to open the door, holding a bouquet of lavender coloured flowers he had procured on the way over to Lavender's flat.


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[info]lavishly
2011-12-27 06:22 am UTC (link)
The knock on the door pulled her from her most recent nap. She uncurled from her place on her sofa, picked up her well-worn copy of As You Like It on the coffee table along with her reading glasses. (The very pair that she only ever wore when no one else could see her.) Stifling a yawn, she crossed her flat to go answer her door and presumably let Michael in.

She still peeked out the window first, wand within easy reach just in case. She couldn't but smile to see him standing there, which was quickly complicated by the fact he had brought flowers. Sure as she had been, it didn't mean that she wasn't terrified about whatever they were doing. But it was a new day and she wasn't feeling like the world might end within the next five minutes.

There really was something to be said about a solid uninterrupted four hours of sleep coupled with naps through out the day. It put things in a new sort of perspective. Even dressed in nothing more than a jumper and some comfy pajama pants, she didn't look quite as peaky or on edge as she had yesterday or the day before when she had gotten all dressed up. "I'm glad you decided to stop by," she said opening the door to let him in. "Although I'm hoping that the flowers aren't because I was completely wrong and the meeting last night was a total disaster."

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-27 06:47 am UTC (link)
Michael grinned and shook his head, holding them out for her to take from him. "No, it wasn't so bad as all that, I promise. Still wish you could have come, but I understand." Michael looked her over, smiling earnestly. "You look a lot better, Lav. How are you feeling?" he kissed her on the cheek and stepped inside her flat closing the door behind him.

"And of course I came, you promised me baked goods, I wasn't going to pass that up."

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-27 07:32 am UTC (link)
Lavender took the flowers thanking him as he came into her flat. She crossed over to the kitchen so she could get a vase for the flowers. "I look and feel heaps better today than I did last night and I was really in no position to be dealing with that level of...well, anything." She shook her head. "But so far today has been good - like I said full of sleeping, reading and a little baking."

She turned around, leaning over the island. "There's spinach quiche in the refrigerator and that's chocolate zucchini." Lavender reached over to see if her cake was still warm. Sure, there were spells to help that sort of thing along, but she always thought it tasted better if she waited and let it cool normally. "And my carrot cake is cool enough to frost if you'd like a slice of that."

Her normal appetite had returned today, which was a good thing and she was intent to make all of her favorites while that was the case. Although in all fairness, just about everything she could bake was a favorite. "Okay, so maybe more like a normal amount of baking."

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-27 08:28 am UTC (link)
Michael followed her toward the kitchen area, listening to her speak. "Sounds like you've had a busy day. Sleeping the day away, have you? Sounds like a nice way to spend one's time." Michael leaned against the wall out of her way and watched her. "I'd offer my help but y'know, I don't know anything about any of this so I wouldn't be any help at all."

He glanced around and laughed a bit. "You call this a normal amount of baking? What does a lot of baking look like, then?" He might have been good with potions recipes but he never could understand cooking.

"Oh yeah, I've been meaning to ask you - have you tried to use any sleeping potions yet? I'm working with a few to see if I can't modify them toward these memories, but seeing as sleeping draughts are made for actual dreams and not memories, it's not really that easy. I've made some stronger versions of the normal sleeping potions though, we can at least give them a try for now." He shrugged, surveying her baked goods as if what he was saying wasn't really that much of a feat. Maybe if he could manage to block out the memories from their sleep that would be something, but at the moment he didn't feel like he was accomplishing anything but playing at potions.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-27 06:34 pm UTC (link)
"That's okay you can just stand there, watch, and provide conversation." Maybe another time she would offer to teach him how to do something because it really wasn't the complicated. She supposed it wasn't that difference than potions class, but without the gross ingredients.

"A lot of baking would be this doubled or maybe tripled, and that would just be what I manage at home." As she spoke she moved effortlessly around her kitchen to get what she needed to make the frosting. "I mean at the shop this isn't even a little. Sort of like the cake." The carrot cake was miniature having used the smallest pans she had, but she had to do something with her carrots. Other than throw them at unwanted guests.

"No, no sleeping potions, I don't like to do anything new the week before." It wasn't the best, but she had away to manage her monthly issues. At least that way she knew what to expect. "Do you think some sort of dreamless drought would work because they're not exactly dreams?" Not to mention it wasn't solving the problem, just putting a bandage on a wound.

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-27 07:13 pm UTC (link)
"So do you ever start baking in bulk because you are used to doing it at work? Instead of just making enough for yourself - or y'know, me?" he laughed, because obviously he wasn't the only person she would make things for.

Michael nodded, knowing that for her it may be a bit more tricky than the others. When she asked about the dreamless drought he shook his head. "No, I don't think they would. The drought might affect them in some manner, though. Since it's not actually your memory, it's coming forward when you sleep because your mind is most vulnerable then. So it may pull you out of the memory and leave only Pandora's bits in - y'know, the people who were actually involved in the memory, rather than you lot who weren't even there. But I think you'd still experience the memory just like before, just not with you in it." He didn't know if that was for certain, but seeing as dreams generally involved the person who was dreaming them, it seemed logical enough that the dreamless drought would stop them from dreaming about themselves and allow room for the memory to play on loop ad nauseam while they slept, which wasn't what he was really attempting to do.

"I wonder if there is a way to mix in a targeted temporary memory obliviation..." Michael mused, mostly to himself.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-28 12:49 am UTC (link)
"I'll do it." She didn't need to hesitate or pause to consider if that would work or not. "I'll try your sleeping potions, see if that gives me any distance or any some sort of lucid state so that I could interact with it." Lavender had experienced lucid dreaming before, it wasn't always the greatest of experience, but it was definitely something familiar to her. "Especially if it could help."

This morning might have been largely taken as a day of rest from her physical exhaustion, but also away from everything that she had been messing around with the dream database, the spots and what she was so caught up in. For a little while she needed to pretend and even sort of believe that things weren't that bad. It was short but necessary respite, as she tried to ignore the possibility that it might also be the eye of the storm.

"Can you even obliviate something like that? Not that I know anything about it, but I doubt it would be easy."

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-28 01:22 am UTC (link)
Michael was a bit surprised by how willingly she volunteered to help. He hadn't even really asked it of her and considering all the other things she was doing and the shite she had to deal with, he didn't really expect to put it on her to do more. "You sure? I mean, you're doing plenty already, Lav. I will need people to try them, obviously, since that's the only reason I'd be making them anyway, but I don't want to make anything more stressful for you."

He shrugged at her question. "I never really looked into memory charms much. We'd have to ask some Obliviators about that. But I'm sure we could look to see if we can find anything on it. Anything is worth looking into at this point, though I don't think any of it concerning these memories is going to be easy, honestly. Whatever they are, they aren't normal magic.

"I would like some carrot cake though, so long as I can eat it and not have it thrown at me." He gave her a lopsided grin, attempting to change the mood from the grimness.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-28 02:29 am UTC (link)
"It's effecting me and I'm willing. I don't really have anything to lose, do I?" Her Gryffindor tendencies always came out when needed. Brave and a little foolish, but that was what you needed to be brave sometimes. Lavender looked up from the frosting she was whipping up to him. "And it's a good idea."

It certainly wasn't something she would have thought of, but maybe it was better that there were other brains working on this. She had said as much at the start - after all, she was just Lavender Brown, barely taken seriously and most likely to be underestimated.

She smiled at him when he mentioned the cake. "Well, I think I might make you work a little earn a slice and learn something in the process. Why don't you grab a spatula you like," she pointed to the assortment of baking and cooking utensils on the island. "Then get over here I'll give you a quick tutorial on cake frosting."

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-28 03:33 am UTC (link)
He nodded. "I suppose not. I doubt it could make them any worse, just leave them the same if anything. I hope they do something though." Michael rubbed the back of his neck. He hadn't really thought about it being a good or bad idea really, just an idea to do something. "I just wanted to see if I could do something for you lot. Thanks for helping me with this, Lav."

He sighed dramatically. "Oh alright fine. I guess I can do that." Michael walked over to look at the cooking utensils. "So which one is a spatula again?" he grinned at her, picking one up and standing next to her. "Alright, if this gets ruined, don't blame me." Michael poked her in the side with his spatula.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-28 04:38 am UTC (link)
"The worst you can do is make things crumbly, but I would probably forgive you if it came to that." She nodded, doing a good job at sounding serious. Lavender set down the bowl and pulled out the pulled out the mixer, taking a swipe of the frosting from there to make sure it tasted right. "Otherwise, the most of it is aesthetics and I don't need a pretty cake today." He would even get a practice round with the filling layer and really it would taste good all the same.

Lavender turned to him, obviously surprised when he poked her, but by no means upset by it. Seldom having to share baking space with anyone who wasn't family, she was pretty sure she hadn't ever been poked with her own cooking utensils. At least not in a playful manner. "You know, I don't think that's quite what they are used for." Feeling a need to answer his little poke, she batted his nose with the mixer, leaving a dollop of frosting behind.

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-28 06:42 am UTC (link)
"Well I don't know about you, but I certainly was expecting a spectacular looking cake today. I can't eat it if it's not going to look like the do at the bakery. If you're going to let the standards drop at home, who's to say they aren't going to drop at the bakery too? I might just need to have a word with your aunt about the work ethic of her niece at this rate. This is really unacceptable." Michael stuck his tongue out at her, though that didn't do much for him as he ended up with frosting on his nose in the end anyway.

Michael stuck his finger on his nose, putting it to his tongue to taste it. "Mmmm. Well now, Lav, I think that was a waste of frosting. Who's using utensils for incorrect purposes now?" Michael raised an eyebrow. He dipped his spatula in the frosting and waggled it threateningly in front of her face. "You just made a mistake, love." He bent the spatula back and let the frosting fly toward her face, laughing.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-29 01:19 am UTC (link)
"Michael!" She shrieked, trying to move out of the way of the flying frosting. Only she wasn't quick enough. The frosting hit the side of her face, getting in her hair. Flour in her hair by accident was one thing, but frosting intentionally was something different. While not exactly appropriate, it was a far better memory to associate with the frosting than what she had to go through to get the cream cheese for it. No, this was exactly what she needed - a bit of fun.

"I don't think it tastes better in my hair." She brushed the frosting out and shook out it so it fell down on the ground. With her other hand she reached over and cut a piece from the top half of the cake. "But I think you should try some cake, to see if they go well together." Lavender picked up the cake and smushed into his face. Some of it had to go into his mouth.

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-29 04:55 am UTC (link)
Michael was still laughing when she smashed the cake in his face, so he ended up with plenty in his mouth. He chewed dramatically with his mouth wide open, making loud "Mmmm" noises as he did. "This is so much better when it's baked into a cake and not being thrown at me," he said, when he was finally able to speak after swallowing the bit that had made it into his mouth.

"But I don't want to be rude, Lav. Here, you should have some too." Michael looped his arm around her waist to pull her to him and rubbed his face against hers, trying to get the cake to stick to her face instead of his. Most of it crumbled down between them but he laughed anyhow. "Now that is how you share a cake," he said and then dipped his finger in the frosting. "Oh wait, you need some of this," and painted her lips with it before leaning down and kissing it off of them.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-30 07:13 pm UTC (link)
Lavender laughed, eyes pressed close to prevent crumbs from getting in, but also because he was close again. She supposed on some level this was what twenty-three was supposed to feel like - full of laughter, cake, and kisses. Pretending in that perfect, unburdened other version of her had got her into trouble in the past. It was because no matter how hard she tried to forget or let them go, her burdens were always there heavy upon her head.

Still, she kissed him. The frosting making it a bit awkward, but not in a bad way. Feeling bold, she reached into the bowl, coating a finger with frosting so that she could smear it on his cheek. So, when she broke away from his lips with a little nip she could lick and kiss the frosting off his cheek. "You know, I can't say that this is quite what I had in mind when I invited you over." She wrapped her arms around his waist, amused by the turn of events.

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-30 08:03 pm UTC (link)
Michael grinned down at her, placing a kiss on her forehead. "Now you know better than to invite me into the kitchen to help," he laughed, shaking his head a bit.

"Alright, do you want to actually frost this cake, or is it ruined now?" It was missing a piece since it had been shoved into his face, but he supposed the rest could still be done. "I promise to behave...mostly." He gave her a smirk and kissed her one more time before stepping back and wielding his spatula again. "Let's frost this baby so I can eat it already!"

Michael was glad that this afternoon had started off nice because when they began talking about the meeting, he didn't think it would be quite as pleasant.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-31 12:25 am UTC (link)
Lavender scrunched her face up at him as he kissed her forehead. "I'm pretty sure that I put you in charge of all official frosting duties, which maybe was my first mistake." Except her tone said that this was anything but a mistake. She liked having him in her kitchen, frosting and cake all of the place. "I also think that you've had some cake, but all right, let's see what we can do with the remains."

She brushed the cake crumbs from his face, before taking a moment to refocus on the task at hand. Salvage and frost the cake. The top was missing a chunk, but she could manage that once it was all together. "If you can behave, you'll want to start by scooping some of the frosting on the piece and then spread it out for the filling." It wouldn't be too much of a process to talk him through the steps to frost the cake, but she was interested to see how he interacted in her element.

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-31 01:29 am UTC (link)
Michael laughed quietly to himself. "Yeah well, that was sans-frosting. I have to eat it the way it was meant to be." He looked very serious and focused toward the frosting and the cake as she began giving him the instructions. "Okay. Spread the frosting out for the filling. Got it." Michael put his spatula into the frosting bowl and pulled it out with a glob of frosting on it, and began spreading it over the cake, trying not to break or crumble it apart.

When the whole thing was covered with frosting, he looked back up at Lavender. "Okay, how's that? Not as good as yours, I'm sure. Is it a complete disaster? I'm sorry, Lav, I tried my best!" Michael said over-dramatically, smiling as he did.

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-31 03:52 am UTC (link)
Schooling her face with a very serious expression she examined his frosting job, spinning the plate around to see it from all angles. "I suppose it will have to make due, but for now I would suggest that you keep your day job and you know good thing that it tastes good." She smiled over at him, teasing because that was the only way she could respond to his over-dramatics.

"Alright, I'll cut us two pieces if I can can trust you to scrounge up something to drink." There were a few clean cups already out on her counter and she could trust him to poke through her refrigerator to find something he liked even if she didn't have much besides the basics. In the meantime, she picked up the knife and cut out the bottom piece that was missing it's top. Now, the cake just looked like a piece was already eaten.

She had a feeling they were transitioning now, in the other reason why he was here - to let he know how the meeting had gone. Although if Justin was any indication, things could have gone a bit better. She just wasn't sure if this was an island, dinner table or sofa sort of conversation as each location held a different connotation.

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-31 04:32 am UTC (link)
Michael nodded slowly and sadly. "Yeah, I figured as much. I'll stick to alcohol, it's all I really know! I'm such a sad bloke."

He went to the refrigerator and opened it, looking for something to drink and grabbed the milk, pouring it into the two clean cups on the counter and replacing it back in the fridge. He picked up the two cups and turned to her. "Alright, so where to, love? Table?"

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-31 05:05 am UTC (link)
"Sure, kitchen table will work just fine." Which meant it was going to be that kind of conversation, requiring some sort of slightly formal frame. Even if that formal frame did include the Betta fish she had living in a bowl in the middle of her table. Lavender grabbed two forks and the plates before moving over to the glass table. The mess from the frosting adventure could be dealt with later.

Lavender sat down at the table, giving them both a moment to settle and start in on the cake. As it was only a matter of time before the topic came up, Lavender opted to start in on it. "So, I bumped into Justin and Bianca when I popped out to pick up some cream cheese for the frosting earlier today, which didn't seem to go all that well."

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-31 05:34 am UTC (link)
Michael had a bite of cake halfway to his mouth when she mentioned Justin and Bianca, but it didn't end up making it all the way. "Oh fuck," was all the reply he could first come up with. He certainly couldn't have hoped for a worse way to start things off. Of all the people for her to run into, Justin and Bianca should have been the last.

He sighed and ran his hands over his face and through his hair. "I'm sorry, Lavender. I really am. I guess I probably could have done a better job telling them. I tried to get Justin to understand - fuck, even Ernie understood and he's friends with Bianca - but he just would not listen to reason. I have tried and tried to talk to him but I just don't know. He keeps harping on about me being the one who told everyone for you and just...so what did they say to you?"

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-31 05:55 am UTC (link)
Lavender cut off a piece of her cake, but didn't eat it. "Well, there was a bit of a nasty exchange with Justin in the journals before that so when I saw them I honestly tried to just keep going because I wasn't exactly up for being attacked or something." She had even told them as much because yes, she was feeling better but that didn't mean she wanted to deal with open hostility when today was meant to be a break from the world as it were.

"Except Bianca stops me demanding an answer for why I have suspicions about her like I've been running around telling everyone what I think when all I did was tell you and then ask you to tell the people at the meeting." And maybe that all could have gone differently if it had been a different time of the month, but it wasn't and she had been scared. She still was afraid for her life. "Which I'm sorry about because apparently it was like way more hostile than I thought it would have gone, but they should know because I could be wrong, but what if I was right and it's not impossible."

Lavender hadn't wanted to put Michael in the middle of something, but he had offered and there really was no way she was going anywhere last night. "So, anyway, I told her about not fitting the pattern, her nightmare the first night and her visions and you know also that she doesn't have a spot like all of us who are marked for dead do. Which she doesn't - have a spot and...God!" Lavender paused shaking her head, because of everything how mean Justin had been to her really bothered her. "Then Justin looked at me like I've caused him some great offense before he went off with her saying he was going to prove me wrong."

She had gotten herself all worked up now, totally making her question the worth of the cream cheese. Lavender tried to not let it get to her, to remind herself that she was supposed to be telling Michael, not yelling at him. This wasn't his fault, but she needed to talk to someone, even if for her talking was lots of words stumbling on top of each other all at once.

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-31 06:28 am UTC (link)
Michael really hated hearing all of it. He hated confrontation between his friends, with his friends, and this was all just seemingly getting worse and worse. He didn't want to interrupt her so he tried his best to keep his comments to himself while she told the story, knowing that she needed to get this all out. Once it seemed like she'd finished he let out a long sigh.

"I'm sorry, Lav." He reached across the table and took her hand in his, squeezing it. "If I had known that it would go this way I never would have mentioned her name at all. But it was important to do so, because we did need to talk to her and find out why she was having visions when everyone else was just having nightmares. Shite, I don't know what to do. Justin thinks that if he waits it out and a murder happens and he was with Bianca that it proves her innocent. As if we know how many people are involved at this time. We don't know how many people Pandora has murdering for her! This is so ridiculous! I don't want him putting himself in danger, but we can't seem to get him to listen at all."

Michael looked at her, knowing that none of this was the least bit helpful. "I really don't know what to say, love. This whole thing is a mess. Are you...okay?"

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[info]lavishly
2011-12-31 10:34 pm UTC (link)
She squeezed his hand back, using it as a sort of focusing point. So far Michael had only helped her and getting mad or frustrated at him when she was really upset about other things wasn't going to help any. "I'm okay," she said, which wasn't the complete truth but it wasn't a lie either.

"I just wish...well, no if I was wishing for things I wouldn't start there, but things are happening so fast, Harry's dead, other people are dying or might die and there's nothing to keep us together, so it's like we're all turning on each other." That was how she saw it. For as bad as things were at Hogwarts, they had stayed united, kept each other safe as they suffered some common experience. Only that didn't exist anymore. This time around they were adults, all out in their own lives, five years gone from actively being part of any sort of army and all with very different things to worry about.

"And I don't want her to be killing people anymore, I don't want anyone to be killing others, but I'm not crazy. I'm not."

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[info]mlcorner
2011-12-31 11:03 pm UTC (link)
Michael knew how things went when people got scared. He'd read enough books to know and when she mentioned turning against each other, one in particular came to mind: Lord of the Flies. He knew just how quickly it could turn into this and he was scared that he might have contributed to the witch hunt by calling out Bianca's name, even if it was true that her case was different than the rest. Maybe he shouldn't have enabled Lavender's suspicions, regardless of how scared she seemed. He wanted to protect her and make her feel safe, but looking back at the fallout now, it seemed more likely it had done more harm than good. Maybe he was doing all of this because he cared too much about Lavender's well being, not because he wanted to find out the truth about Bianca's visions.

He nodded. "I guess this isn't how we started things out in seventh year, huh?" It seemed a lot easier back then, all under one roof and nowhere else to run to unless your parents decided to pull you from school. "Look Lav, I'm here. I don't think you're nutters. I haven't since you first told me. I wouldn't have told them if I did. What you have noticed is true. And maybe Bianca is just a special seer or maybe she is having the visions because she's remembering things she's done. We don't really know one way or the other. All we know is that her case is different and that is something to be weary of, no matter how sweet she might be. That doesn't mean we want her stoned to death on the spot, but I guess-I guess you should just steer clear of her and Justin for a while until we find out more about her visions. Hopefully it will all cool down and we can get some answers."

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-01 12:54 am UTC (link)
"Getting any sort of answers from her, about her, isn't going to be any easier now." Now she had Justin standing up for her, Bianca was on the defensive. The whole thing probably could have been handled better, but what was done what done. She couldn't change that. "Seers, real Seers, people who have a well-developed Inner Eye aren't that common. If she's a Seer, than she's a Seer, and those people like are usually on file with the Ministry along with what they have Seen.

"So why hasn't she gone yet? If she's a Seer, she should have gone the moment she had the vision and I don't know, maybe things could have been prevented." For as much stock as Lavender put into divination, her own Inner Eye was weak - she had dreams sometimes and with the proper focus could get an honest reading, but she never had any sort of real vision. And it wasn't for lack of trying, she would give a lot for that sort of ability even if it came with the burden of knowing. Lavender wanted it and it would be far better than the burdens she received instead.

"And okay, maybe she's scared because like I said this whole thing is scary, but if it was me, no matter how terrified I was or even if I thought it could be me, I would have told the appropriate people." Maybe that was what she didn't get. Lavender was on some level terrified of herself, of what she might become even now years later, that she insisted on regular healer visits to make sure she was healthy, kept herself away from people when it was bad. "So what's keeping her from going? Why is a woman we've never heard of until now her greatest fear? There are just all these questions and suddenly I'm crazy? I'm looking to hang someone?"

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-01 01:36 am UTC (link)
Michael didn't know much about Seers and how they were registered with the Ministry. He never paid much attention to all that. So if all Seers' visions were on file with the Ministry that meant that Bianca would - should - probably know that as well seeing as she was just as interested in Divination as Lavender was. But that didn't necessarily make her a bad person. It had only been a week, not exactly a long time, but people were being murdered and Michael was fairly certain that he himself would have gone to the Ministry when that had begun if it was happening to him.

"I dunno, Lav. Maybe she didn't know it was a vision - maybe she's never had one before? I don't really know that much about her to be honest. She's pretty quiet. I barely got her to speak two words to me at Justin's party and I'm sure that Smith's appearance didn't help matters any with his calling everyone out...bloody hell!" Michael suddenly perked up as if he'd remembered something. He didn't know why he hadn't seen it before, but now all of Justin's over-reactions to this situation seemed to make sense to him. It was all because of what Zacharias Smith had said about him at the party. Michael now understood what Justin meant about 'being useful.'

"Lav, Smith showed up pissed to Justin party and started spouting a load of rubbish about everyone there. I was the one who answered the door, I tried to keep him out but he pushed past me and just started ripping into every person he could see. Apparently Justin went to Smith's dad's funeral and Smith basically said it was no big deal that his dad died during the war and then called him a useless layabout and I think Justin is just trying not to be useless like Smith said he was. Shite, I can't believe he put any stock into what that prick said. You would think he knew he was a bloody prat by the fact that I punched the fucking idiot right in his smug face." Michael's fist balled up just thinking about it again, but he tried to remain calm because he didn't need to be worrying about Smith or his fucked up sense of reality right then. "I think this is just all a huge over-reaction on Justin's part. I mean, he does think Bianca is innocent, but this isn't just about her either."

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-01 08:46 pm UTC (link)
Michael did make a good point. It could have been her first vision or she could have not known what it was. Except that she did knew and she didn't seem like it was a new thing. If it were, Lavender probably wasn't the person she went to. Looking back it was a bit odd for Bianca to tell Lavender, someone she didn't really know beyond a few shared interests and some friends in common. Maybe it was just as odd for her to invite her into her home, but she had wanted another reading and Bianca had mentioned the interest and ability.

Except she wouldn't have any time to turn those thoughts into words as Michael seemed to have a sudden revelation about things. "You punched him in the face?" Lavender shook her head, that wasn't the point. Although it was becoming clear that she had missed a lot in the span of thirty-six hours. She supposed that just went back to how quickly things were going. "So great on top of the stress and fear of the situation itself, we have that too." It was the sort of thing that might have happened back at school, but at least then they were forced to see each, share space, sometimes even dormitories, so issues got resolved quicker or never reaching the boiling point.

"I mean over-reaction is one thing, but he was unnecessarily mean to me and you know, not being all that smart about the whole thing, even if she is innocent."

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-02 10:26 pm UTC (link)
Michael nodded and may have given a small smirk because despite having been ridiculously pissed off, he was maybe a little proud of that fact. And it didn't hurt that the prat had deserved every bit of it. "Yes I did and he bloody well deserved it. No one fucks with my mates and gets away with it if I'm there to do something about it." Which was true with Michael Corner; he didn't like bullies and he wouldn't put up with people being rude to his friends.

"What did he say to you?" Michael didn't know what their exchange was but both of them had said that the other had said things now and he had no idea exactly what had transpired between them. "He said that you called him stupid. And then amended it to 'not so smart' later when I didn't make a comment on it saying I should have stood up for him or something. I told him it wasn't really my place to apologise for you if you were mean to him, but like I told him, I really don't know what either of you two said to one another." He really shouldn't even be asking her what Justin said either, because he shouldn't be getting in the middle of it, but there he was and he knew that he'd be in the middle regardless so he might as well see if he could get a better picture of what was said between the two of them.

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-02 11:11 pm UTC (link)
She sighed, picking at her cake for a moment as she tried to figure out a place to start. "He wrote me like this letter in the margins of my journal," said Lavender. "He went on about how Bianca is such a good person that he wouldn't even consider a possibility that she might somehow be involved. Then he claimed that lots of people had visions and belittled my suspicion by saying I should have been there to tell everyone." And she had wanted to be there because all of this was important. IT all mattered because it was people's lives on the line, but for as important as it was, she knew that going to that meeting would not have been a good idea, not when it was also the full moon.

"So, I was like, I didn't just dump it on Michael and bunk the meeting, but I honestly couldn't be there, which he claimed to know, but-" She shook her head, that was not the point. Of all of it, it didn't matter if he knew that she couldn't be there or not. She hadn't been there and Michael was her proxy, she hadn't been running away from anything. "I also explained to him how lots of people don't just have visions. I mean he even called the nightmares of our worst fears that one night visions and they weren't. They were more like dreams or waking dreams for you know, the people who weren't asleep and it's not the same thing.

"I also said that just because Bianca is a good person doesn't make what I feel irrelevant or impossible because look at what happened to Ginny Weasley, and I said that we should seriously consider what Bianca's role might be in all of this." Which seemed like a moot point by now because she was on the defensive and if she was dangerous, it was going to be worse now. "And yeah, I said I don't think that he can objective about the whole thing, which he seemed to take offense to and he's the one who brought up that he might not be as smart as others, but he can give people the benefit of the doubt. And really what right do I have calling anyone stupid?"

Lavender had always been a bit sensitive about the fact that she wasn't all that bright. Especially when a lot of her time at school, she compared herself to Hermione Granger who was the brightest witch of her age. That was certainly what at least part of the Ron Weasley thing had been about and even that turned on her. "But I did say he wasn't being so smart because he wanted to prove me wrong by sticking with her for a few days even if she might be imperiused, which isn't that smart. And all of this concludes rather spectacularly with him telling me to..."

She paused not really wanting to say it, but wanting to get across what he told her accurately. "Fuck off and that he expected an apology. And that was just in the journals. So, yeah, mean."

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-03 11:50 pm UTC (link)
Michael took the time that Lavender explained the exchange in her margins to eat some of his cake, but he was still attentive. If there was one thing you could count on Michael about, it was that he would listen, even to Lavender's fairly lengthy stories. He even enjoyed them. Of course this one wasn't very enjoyable considering the subject. Michael waited until she finished, but he just couldn't get over the last bit. He'd never, ever heard Justin speak to someone like this. He was always loving and forgiving, even to people who were rude to him, so he just couldn't understand this attack on Lavender. It truly hurt him.

Michael reached across the table and took her hand. "Hey Lav, I'm sorry. I never would have thought that Justin would react like that. I mean, he's your friend, for Merlin's sake. I just - I don't know what's going on with him. I'm sorry this happened.

"Look, I don't want to be stuck in the middle of this, but I do support you, y'know. Regardless of whether I agree with everything you've said, I still support you and respect your opinions and I always have. I just hate that it turned out like this. I wish it had gone better. I can't believe Justin's reacting this way. And even when Ernie is telling him not to!"

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-04 01:35 am UTC (link)
Now she was sort of wishing that they weren't at the kitchen table her betta fish sort of between them. The sofa probably would have been better because just holding hands wasn't enough. "We both know that you don't have to apologize for Justin and that you kind of are stuck in the middle of it, but thank you." Her voice got progressive gentler as she reached the end of the sentence.

She was a swirl of emotions and through them all she wanted to be able to focus on something good. And Michael with the kisses, cake, and most importantly saying he supported her was that thing. Lavender wanted to cling onto him like some barnacle and never let go, even if that was just as scary in a whole different way. At least then the scariness came with a sense of belonging and also that she wasn't entirely losing her mind.

"What about the others? You said, Ernie told Justin not to react that way, how did everyone else take it?" She was sure there were other points to bring up, but at the moment that seemed like the most relevant one. Lavender didn't want to be blindsided by any of her friends attacking her - although she still would, because they were supposed to be her friends.

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-04 11:53 pm UTC (link)
She was right, of course. He was being a hypocrite now. He had already told Justin that he wasn't going to apologise for Lavender's behaviour yet here he was, apologising away for the way that Justin had been acting. Maybe he truly was in deeper than he'd ever been before. How'd this even happen? He didn't even think it was possible, yet here he was. "I know I don't. I just - I have trouble believing that he would ever act like this and I feel a bit - I don't know - ashamed of him, maybe? Ashamed of his behaviour at least. I've never once heard him talk to a friend in such a way so for him to turn on you like that so easily is just - it's just not right."

Michael watched her closely, eying her face and squeezed her hand before he said, "Honestly, no one else said a whole lot about it. I think because Justin was objecting so loudly for most everyone and Ernie was being so cool-headed and logical about it, no one else seemed to find the need to speak up. That might remain to be seen though, Lav. I can't say that no one else won't say anything to you about it - and it might not be nice either."

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-05 02:04 am UTC (link)
"Great." As if this whole thing wasn't bad enough. She would get to know about that, but hopefully Justin would be the worst of it. Especially if he had been very vocal during the meeting. Unless that swayed other people toward his sort of non-reason and being more reckless than they had to. It wasn't just a Gryffindor trait after all. And she would just have to deal with it as it came.

"Okay, is there anything else I should know about?" Because there had to be something worthwhile from the meeting beside Justin being mean to her. And really, it was just far too frightening to consider that of all of her peers she was the one that knew the most about what was happening. She was Lavender Brown, she wasn't ever supposed to be in that position. She needed other people to tell her way to do and give her those important social cues, she couldn't be the ones setting them.

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-05 10:23 pm UTC (link)
"Oh yeah, there's plenty. Do you want the important stuff or the not really important but kind of entertaining stuff?" Michael smiled a little, trying to lighten the mood a bit. Yeah, this shite was heavy but it got a bit old always being so bloody serious all the time. And he was Michael Corner, well known for not being quite so serious when he probably should be. It's not like he didn't know how to be, just that he didn't want his life to be remembered as one giant, stiff one-note set of moments.

"Like the part where Ron punched Ernie in the face out of nowhere right in the middle of the meeting. He just stood up, walked over there all nonchalant like nothing was out of the ordinary and suddenly he was punching Ernie in the face. Ernie punched him back in the stomach too! And Ron looked completely shocked like he had no idea what he'd just done and then sort of just walked out of there dazed and Hermione ran after him. Merlin, it was kind of hilarious." Michael was grinning like a loon, even though this was obviously not important in the least bit and Lavender probably didn't care either.

"Yeah I know it's not important, but it was still pretty dramatic to say the least."

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-06 12:01 am UTC (link)
Lavender shook her head. He found it funny, but all of this violence between them was just more a sign that tensions were high. And it was hard to take a break from it, because there was no end in sight. She wanted to share his amusement over the situation, but she just wasn't there.

"Was there anything productive, any breakthroughs about what's happening? What we can do? Should be doing?" She was still marked, so were the others and that meant they were going to die. And while she sort of fluctuating between accepting that outcome for herself, she needed to know that she was going everything she could to make stop it. Michael had promised that much before too, but it still wasn't his life on the line.

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-06 03:31 am UTC (link)
Michael nodded. "Er, where do I start? Did Luna tell you anything about our memory experiment? We didn't have many breakthroughs, but at least we figured out what can't be done?" he sort of asked instead of said, feeling a bit stupid. Luna had been the one with all the ideas, he had just been along for the ride really, but he tried his best.

"So Luna said that you and she had suspected that the nightmares might actually be prophecies or memories, but most likely memories - someone else's memories stuck in your heads. So first we tried to remove them like you would any other memory, but that proved impossible. Second we pulled out a normal memory and left it alone to see how it reacted to being in the open air - to see if it would try to seek out a vessel if we didn't put it in a container. But it didn't do that either, it just dissipated. Next we wanted to see if we could take one of Luna's memories and put them into my head, but that wouldn't work either." Michael recalled the experiment, remembering how many things they had tried that just resulted in nothing happening.

"So basically we have concluded that your nightmare-memories don't act like normal memories at all. But I'm not convinced that they aren't still memories. It seems like something's made them stick to you lot - and that something attracted them to you in the first place. So far that seems to be magic since it's only been wizards and witches who have been killed, yeah? I mean, we didn't really get any results, I suppose, but I guess there are some conclusions we can draw from the information at least."

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-06 04:13 am UTC (link)
Lavender nodded listening to him explain what he and Luna had been working on. He probably could have lied to her and made up they other ventures, but she just needed to hear that she wasn't the only looking. Especially not when she might be getting written off for a notion.

"That's what I've been thinking about, is there some sort of uniting factor between all of us with the not-nightmares. And really the best I get is maybe we all have some sort of darkness already within us or you know just the possibility for it because I mean that's what these things are - dark." She wouldn't accept that it could just be random. It didn't feel random and it was reassuring that at least she wasn't alone on that front.

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-08 11:23 pm UTC (link)
Michael abandoned his cake altogether. He didn't really like what she was saying nor did he know where she might be going with it. With a heavy sigh and stood up and tugged on her hand trying to pull her into a standing position as well. "C'mere," he said and he led her over to the sofa where he sat down and pulled her down after him, into the circle of his arms.

"The uniting factor here is that you've all magic, not any sort of darkness inside of you. Yes, they are dark, but that has nothing to do with the lot of you being potentially full of darkness yourselves." Michael shook his head and lifted her chin so she was looking at him. "Don't talk like that, Lav. There's no darkness inside of you, alright?"

He wanted to move on to another topic, but he didn't want to abandon this idea until he knew she'd at least listen to him. There was something unfortunate in the way she said what she did and he hated hearing that sadness but ultimately that finality in her voice.

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-12 04:59 am UTC (link)
She looked at him a moment, sort of taken at how differently he saw her against what she was, against what sort of thoughts went through her head. Lavender had told him once that she used to be a vegetarian, but that wasn't all that had changed. He might not have seen her as dark or that there was darkness inside of her, but she knew better. She dealt with it every day, that little thing sometimes just floating in the background of her awareness and sometimes coming to the front and center. Still she took what comfort he offered her.

"Michael, when I'm not having not-nightmares about Cornish pixies eating me alive, I'm having actual nightmares about Greyback finishing what he started, which sometimes I think might be better because then I would know what I am." Even as she started talking she wasn't sure where this would end or where they would be when she arrived there. "Because when it's not that, I have these thoughts, these urges that aren't right, that aren't me.

"I mean for like at least five days each month I am terrified that I am going to hurt someone and not just a stranger, but someone who actually cares about me." Lavender saw her self as a potentially dangerous person, not in an obvious sort of a way, but deadly for that very reason. It might not have been much of a way to live, but it was what she had.

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-12 06:43 am UTC (link)
Michael had his suspicions about what she thought of herself but he'd never really heard her say it outright. This was definitely the first time she'd said it so openly and while he hated that she felt such things, he was glad that she was comfortable enough with him that she could share them.

He still had his hand on her chin and the first thing he did was kiss her because it made the most sense to him. He wanted her to see that she was not dangerous, not now - now ever. Eventually he pulled away from her and said, "Lav, I know that being in between a werewolf and a human is something altogether different but that doesn't make being a werewolf or being dead by Greyback's hand better. You don't have to be labeled as something in particular just to be okay, y'know. As far as thoughts and urges go, Lav, that's part of being a wolf. I know it feels different for you but it's just how it is."

Michael touched the side of her face softly. "Lavender, you aren't going to hurt anyone. The very fact that you worry so much about it and refuse to come out on those nights and argue with me when I try to get you to do otherwise prove it. And even if you did come out, I don't believe you'd hurt anyone. It's not in you. It's not in here," he pointed to her chest, to the place where her heart resided.

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-12 04:59 pm UTC (link)
She didn't tell people about these sort of things, but she wanted to tell Michael. Maybe to scare him away or maybe just because he deserved to know after how he continued to put up with her. Lavender wasn't sure if he actually knew or not, but considering that he could turn into a wolf, she imagined that he might have something of a better idea than most people. And of course there would always be a small pang of guilt for that, like she was responsible. Although if she was, then there wasn't much she could do to mark him further.

"I never want to hurt anyone," she said softly. Lavender had never wanted to hurt anyone, well, really hurt anyone. It was rooted deeply in who she was, which was probably why that it was difficult - the possibility of something else, even just those urges which he claimed was normal. Nothing about her was normal, not even this weird thing she was entangled in with Michael. However, unless the rest of her life, she didn't exactly mind the abnormality here. With him, there was a comfort there.

"And if I can't be normal, or get to have what I wanted when I was younger, then I'll work to have the knowledge that whatever I might be I will do anything I can to make sure that people aren't seriously hurt because of me."

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-13 01:28 am UTC (link)
Michael nodded in response to what she said. "I know, love." He just wondered if she really knew that she hadn't ever hurt anyone, least of all him. "And you haven't hurt anyone," he decided to add, just in case.

"Lavender, you aren't doing anything to seriously hurt anyone. Why do you think you would? You take plenty of precautions as it is, there's not much more you could do to make yourself any more safe." He considered something else she had said and added, "What did you mean by not getting to have what you wanted when you were younger?"

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-13 01:58 am UTC (link)
And she would keep taking all of those precautions for the rest of her life to make sure that remained true. Sure, to the average person it might make her a little paranoid or even crazy, but it was about being able to feel safe. And to get the feeling, fleeting as it had been since the not-nightmares started, she had to go to extremes. Lavender leaned into him, finding a comfortable spot.

"It doesn't matter," she shaking her head. And it didn't because there were dreams she had to let die because her reality was different now. "I mean people grow up, what they want changes, for me it wasn't exactly growing up, but things changed and you make do with what you have." She could feel a tightness in her chest as she spoke because it hurt. It always hurt to think about what could have been. Her gaze drifted away from his because this was somehow more personal. It was one thing to say she wanted to eat the people she loved, it was another to confess to the boy you were kissing and in this weird nebulous place with that you had planned seven different weddings. Or that she had always pictured herself with children, one boy and one girl, some day and now she was trying to make it be okay with dreams of a fairy cake business and never actually eating someone.

Lavender might have opened up a little, but she wasn't sure that she was ready, or ever would be ready, to let it all come out. Besides today was supposed to be a break from all that. "Can we just talk about something else? Or even you know not talk." After the words had been said she realized that he might take them differently than she intended, but maybe that was were things landed today and she was going to try to let that be okay.

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[info]mlcorner
2012-01-13 06:58 am UTC (link)
Michael wanted to push her, to get that information but he knew better. He was learned when to push and when to let things go when it came to Lavender Brown and hopefully this was what would save him his sanity in the future. Assuming that he planned to do this for a while, which was not something he generally did - plan these types of things. Thinking like this was making him a bit uncomfortable now. He shifted on the sofa, trying to figure out how that thought had crossed his mind.

He nodded. "Yeah okay," he said, but he didn't have anything else to talk about. Well, there was still some more to say about the DA meeting, but most of what the discussed was general theories. Michael looked over at her, unsure as to what she may have actually meant by that. He never really knew when Lavender was okay with certain things and while he would still kiss her every now and again, he never really tried to just snog her senseless anymore like he used to because he was afraid of being hexed or getting an entire bookcase full of books thrown at him. So even if he leaned down and kissed her again now, he did not plan on making it anything extensive because he worried about how she would react if he did. He knew what happened four years ago and he wasn't going to let it happen again - he wasn't that same stupid bloke anymore.

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[info]lavishly
2012-01-13 02:43 pm UTC (link)
Lavender shifted again, so she was looking at him. She wanted to push back that feeling in her stomach and replace it with something better. Years ago, it would have been easy to do this, fall into some boy and get lost in the kissing. It wasn't exactly easy, but it wasn't entirely forgotten or lost. So, she leaned up to kiss him, doing more than just those simple kisses they had exchanged already, pushing it just a hair more.

She had been good at this once. Sure in just how to move and what to do. There was hesitancy now in those motions, a strange carefulness, but she wanted this. Lavender wanted to be kissing him and that in itself was a dangerous thought. But rather than linger on that and all of the other dangerous things looming around her, she decided to worry about kissing him. It probably wouldn't be anything close to any sort of being snogged senseless, but it was a place to start.

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