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Tweak says, "OBLAAAARGH"

MarinaNova NPCs (marinanova_npc) wrote in marinanova,
@ 2013-05-27 15:11:00

Entry tags:

:mingle, aidan reilly, aradia megido, artemis crock, bak chang, bro strider, buffy summers, calliope-caliborn, damon salvatore, daniel osbourne, data, dawn summers, dick grayson (all-star), dirk strider, duo maxwell, elena gilbert, eric northman, hei, helen magnus, helix wamtani, hikaru hitachiin, ianto jones, jack harkness, jean-luc picard, kitty pryde (aoa), kitty pryde (evolution), korra, lacus clyne, laura kinney, malcolm reynolds, martha jones, miranda lotto, nikola tesla, peggy carter, penelope garcia, peter parker (tas), piper halliwell, piter de vries, raven darkholme, rebekah mikealson, richie foley, rogue, rose tyler, sam merlotte, sam winchester, sawyer ford, seven of nine, shining armor, sookie stackhouse, sougo okita, spencer reid, spike, stefan salvatore, tear grants, tieria erde, tyki mikk, wally west, xander harris, yuuki kuran, yuuri shibuya, zatanna zatara, zero kiryuu

Day 221 — Morning mingle : Main shelter
[Wake up and smell the lack of coffee. You're on a bunk bed. Maybe you're a top and maybe you're a bottom. There are five other people in your room. Maybe they're friends or enemies or faces you barely recognize if at all. It doesn't matter much. You can leave this room and you don't need to come back to it.

You should get your rations though. You're probably hungry. You're definitely a little sluggish of body. What happened to that bruise you got sparing yesterday? What happened to your newly dyed hair? Mystery, mystery... Move along. Find the public bathrooms and do your business with a hundred of your closest friends.

Find the kiosk and get your rations. Careful not to let anyone steal them. You won't get more until tomorrow and the bots won't care. They aren't here to hold your hand. If you get sick or hurt and they deem it necessary they will take you to the hospital whether you wish it or not. But why dwell on such things? You're here now and you might as well enjoy it. You even get a free day today.]

(OOC: OOC info. This mingle takes place in the Main shelter over the morning hours.

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	trappedinresin 2013-05-29 03:05 am UTC (link)
	It's fine, as long as it's myself. [No one knows her worst faults as well as she does, after all.] I just mean that it's still hard to believe that Zero could ever be interested in... in something with me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notamasochist 2013-05-29 03:14 am UTC (link)
	[He probably has a better grasp on them, actually. And wouldn't be as harsh on you as you are on yourself.] You say that like it's something new. [Maybe it is to her, but that's not reality.] I was twelve. [And he's been fighting with himself ever since.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	trappedinresin 2013-05-29 03:18 am UTC (link)
	[N-No no no no he can't really mean that, right? He's got to be confused, because twelve??] I thought that Zero got more frustrated with me than anything at that age... (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notamasochist 2013-05-29 03:36 am UTC (link)
	[Dead serious.] I was a lot of things at that age. Frustration was a minor one. The fear often overwhelmed me. No matter how much I tried to push Yuuki away--she wouldn't go. Something I was grateful for yet made me hate myself. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	trappedinresin 2013-05-29 03:41 am UTC (link)
	[She pauses- the flustered reply from before dying down. Her head tilts to the side and she stares up at him.] 'Hate' yourself... [She knows he hated what he was. But to hate himself because of their own relationship?] Why 'hate'...? Why did you feel that you had to feel that way if we were close? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notamasochist
2013-05-29 04:12 am UTC (link)

[And she literally targets and zones in on the more difficult aspect of this entire issue. This is where he stumbles a little with his determination. Faltering. But he knows they've discussed this before. He diverts his gaze and clenches his fists, unable to say it without still feeling the emotions well up inside him.]

It was about a month in. I shattered that mirror and you started bleeding.

I knew then that if I didn't stay away from you...

I fought with myself over and over but never was able to do it. I knew what would happen but...selfishly I clung to you.

[There is so much more to it all than that, he knows. It started elsewhere but just got worse and worse over the years with Yuuki by his side until finally everything just exploded.]

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

trappedinresin
2013-05-29 11:27 am UTC (link)

[She glances down. It's sad that during all the time he lived in genuine fear that he might hurt her.]

I wish I had known.

[Such a long time to carry those sorts of feelings.]

It was shortly after that, when you got that tattoo, wasn't it.

[Her long hair sways from side to side as she shakes her head.]

All that time I had taken comfort in Zero's presence. [Actually, it wasn't until after his arrival that some of her own nightmares and fears had begun to fade.]

Somehow it feels unfair that I had been so at ease with you and you felt so undeserving around me. [Her of all people. Hah- One hand reaching out, she smooths it over his clenched fist.] You never gave yourself enough credit. I was always happy around you.

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notamasochist
2013-05-29 02:21 pm UTC (link)

You understand don't you?

[Gaze lifting to meet hers, Zero loosens the fist as she touches him. Grasping her hand lightly instead, he tries to drive the point home and reach her.]

For all our differences, between everything we've been through and experienced--we are both the exact same. It took me a long time to understand that because I was so blinded by my own feelings.

[Hand squeezing hers gently, he pauses searching her eyes for any signs of understanding.]

The only thing I've ever wanted is your happiness. I just couldn't understand how to give it to you because it went against my own thought process. Those feelings of needing to reject that affection and happiness you provided me, the guilt I felt for having to live off of you--there was no way for me to see that connection between us.

You are my happiness. All this time I ignored how refusing this could make you feel--focusing everything else on you because I was already receiving so much more than I felt I deserved.

[He inhales deeply before pushing forward with the last point.]

Pursuing you now has nothing to do with suddenly feeling deserving. I've messed up so much and hurt you over and over again all because I've been running from it all. I just don't want to hurt you anymore.

We are the same, Yuuki. All I want is for you to be happy--I know you are the same.

My happiness is you.

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trappedinresin
2013-05-29 04:23 pm UTC (link)

[There's so much to take in. 'The same' he says. Even though they're so different, it's true. She can't deny that the lives they have led and the things that they have experienced make both able to understand the other probably more than anyone else.

The fingers within his shift, and she moves. Gently, her arms wind, tight, around his body. She knows. She does. Face buried against his chest, she nods gently against him. They are the same, in so many ways.

It just... somehow aches, too.

Her grip tightens on him. He has to know, right?]

Even though so many things have happened. And we've both hurt each other and ourselves, you have to know it too, now, of course.

[No matter the relationship, though it's certainly more than just friends. It's always been something a little different from that.]

I've always been happy beside you.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notamasochist
2013-05-29 04:51 pm UTC (link)

[A lump forms in his throat as her arms wrap around him. He's not sure how much she understands from his words, but he can tell she gets at least the basics of it. His own arms return the embrace, holding her gently as her head buries into his chest.]

I know. It's taken me a long time, but I know.

[Eyes closing, he rests his cheek against the top of her head as he speaks.]

I understand your confusion. Your hesitation. I know how much you've struggled against these feelings.

But I won't trust anyone else with your smile anymore. I made that mistake before and it almost completely snuffed out your light.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

trappedinresin
2013-05-29 05:58 pm UTC (link)

[Eyes closing, she remains still within his embrace. Until recently it had been so long since she'd been able to take genuine comfort in his presence. Yet it's so easy to slip into. Here like this, putting aside the differences between who and what they are, she can feel at ease. For a moment, she simply allows the warmth of his arms to surround her and breathes him in.

No matter where they are, from now on things will be different between them.]

I wont be a cause of worry for you anymore, okay? From now on lets just focus on the present.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notamasochist 2013-05-29 06:28 pm UTC (link)
	[He's just grateful she hasn't pulled away from him yet. She's not running away for the moment and is beginning to face the reality of everything.] You aren't a burden, Yuuki. You never have been. [Arms giving her a slight squeeze of support, he relishes in the warmth of her body against him.] I wouldn't be myself if I wasn't worried about you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

trappedinresin
2013-05-30 11:36 am UTC (link)

[A nod... and pause, as she goes over those words. He's always worried about and protected her. But-

Pulling back she looks up at him seriously, catching his gaze. Allow her this, all right, Zero?]

In return, you have to allow me to worry over and protect you too. [Not just sit on the sidelines if he might be in danger, or be sent home if more power is needed.]

Zero- [Grip tightens as she pleads] You have to let me help and to watch over you as well.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notamasochist
2013-05-30 12:04 pm UTC (link)

[To be honest, that sort of sets him back on his heels a little because...]

Isn't that the one thing we don't have to worry about?

[For as messed up as their relationship has been during the years that is one thing that never really failed them. Because of this very thing, they were probably able to be here now.]

Even when we were enemies, we stupidly did things to protect and help each other. Even when we didn't need to.

Our relationship might never have recovered in the way that it has if it wasn't for that one thing. For everything we've done wrong, I know that's something we've always done right.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	trappedinresin 2013-05-31 06:54 pm UTC (link)
	[Quiet, staring up at him. After a moment she nods, and her grip loosens. That's right. Really... that's how it's always been between them. Even if, at times, she hasn't always done what is right by way of it.] Of course... [A second nod. She seems satisfied, somehow, by having it all reaffirmed.] Good. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notamasochist
2013-05-31 07:34 pm UTC (link)

[He gives her a slight smile, glad she seemingly has calmed down a little from the anxiety she was feeling about everything originally. He's had to reassure her several times of the same things over the last couple of days. She's not to blame. Everything with them is fine. He wants to be by her side. She's not the reason for the parts of himself he's always hated.

He'll reassure her as many times as he needs to until she understands. Until it gets through. Until she believes it.]

All better now?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	trappedinresin 2013-05-31 07:48 pm UTC (link)
	I'm fine. [A nod. She doesn't really want to make a big deal about things.] In the end, we should focus on making sure everyone made it here safely. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notamasochist 2013-05-31 08:03 pm UTC (link)
	[She's right, so he begins to detangle himself from her a little so they can do just that.] Well there isn't anyone on the communicator complaining about their outfit yet, so that makes things a little harder. [Because...that's what he's expecting.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	trappedinresin 2013-05-31 08:08 pm UTC (link)
	It's not the jumpsuit that bothers me. So much as... [Er...] Never mind. Hopefully we can find some different clothes. You're right about the complaints. It's sort of quiet over the communicators. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notamasochist 2013-05-31 08:12 pm UTC (link)
	...[No no. Please. Continue. He's amused at your reaction and gets it immediately.] So much as what? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	trappedinresin 2013-05-31 08:18 pm UTC (link)
	I-It's nothing...! Forget it, I was just getting derailed. [Because she's not going to mention a lack of undergarments to him, okay!!] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notamasochist 2013-06-01 01:27 am UTC (link)
	No, I'm curious now. You can't just leave it like that. [Stop trying to avoid it.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	trappedinresin 2013-06-01 01:38 am UTC (link)
	There's nothing to get at!! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notamasochist 2013-06-01 01:49 am UTC (link)
	Did they take your bra too? I can understand you'd be irritated with them stealing your panties, but it's not like you need the bra. [Best. Boyfriend. Ever.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	1/2 trappedinresin 2013-06-01 01:55 am UTC (link)
	[ OHMYGOD. Not only has he said the word panties in context to her own but he mentioned her bra too...!] What are you...!? (Reply to this) (Parent)

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trappedinresin, 2013-06-01 02:00 am UTC