InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Tonight we dine in Hell!!"

vampsherifferic (vampsherifferic) wrote in colligo_network,
@ 2011-12-21 09:36:00

Entry tags:

ashley magnus, caroline salvatore, eric northman, jane shepard, lexi branson, molly suresh, renesmee cullen, spike

[The Sheriff's arrival]
Does anyone care to explain to me where I am and why I am here?

Pam! I don't know why you are ignoring the call of your Maker but if you see this, I want you to report to your Maker immediately!

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	rubber 2011-12-21 07:25 pm UTC (link)
	Okay. I've read the stuff you said to other people and just a couple things. There are were-tigers now? Seriously? What's next. A were-monkey? Were-hamster? Vampire Sheriff? Really? That's what you're going with? Do you have vampire gunfights at sun-up with vampire outlaws? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	canmakeyousee 2011-12-21 07:26 pm UTC (link)
	Now I want a were-hamster for Christmas. Guess I know what I'm putting at the top of my list for Santa! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	n7_spectre 2011-12-21 07:29 pm UTC (link)
	Watch out. I hear they're vicious and adorable. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rubber 2011-12-21 07:29 pm UTC (link)
	Just like us! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	n7_spectre 2011-12-21 07:31 pm UTC (link)
	Damn straight. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	canmakeyousee 2011-12-21 07:33 pm UTC (link)
	That just makes me want one even more! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	n7_spectre 2011-12-21 07:39 pm UTC (link)
	Hey, if any place can make it happen, it's here. But I call dibs on the were-chinchillas. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	rubber 2011-12-21 07:29 pm UTC (link)
	I'm not sure you can own people...unless we're talking about a hamster that turns into a wolf on the full moon. In which case, seconded. So seconded. I'm Caroline, by the way. I figure you know that since you read my post (thanks for the reminder to edit, btw), but it never hurts to have a proper introduction. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	canmakeyousee 2011-12-21 07:34 pm UTC (link)
	I'm hoping for a hamster that turns into a wolf on the full moon. A werewolf who turns into a hamster would be hilariously pitiful but definitely not pet-worthy. Nice to meet you, Caroline! I'm Nessie. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rubber 2011-12-21 07:52 pm UTC (link)
	Ooo. Wererabbit. That would be the best. Fluffy and adorable and deadly. Nice to meet you too, Nessie. Okay, I have to ask. Someone's told you about the books, right? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	canmakeyousee 2011-12-21 08:04 pm UTC (link)
	NOW I WANT ONE OF THOSE! Books? What books? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rubber 2011-12-21 08:08 pm UTC (link)
	IKR? Me too. Okay. Brace yourself. I just figure someone should tell you before you find out on your own or run into rabid fangirls. Here. And seriously, brace yourself. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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canmakeyousee, 2011-12-21 08:14 pm UTC

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rubber, 2011-12-21 08:36 pm UTC

	vampsherifferic 2011-12-21 07:53 pm UTC (link)
	Pam belongs to me. She is of my blood. Vampires also own humans. It is not uncommon for a vampire to have a pet, which is usually their human that they feed from on a regular basis. I have owned a few myself over the years. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	canmakeyousee 2011-12-21 08:01 pm UTC (link)
	Maybe where you're from but not here. You're welcome to try enslaving a human, of course, but you won't last very long if you do. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	rubber 2011-12-21 08:02 pm UTC (link)
	Woah. Woah woah woah. Bad vampire. We do not keep humans as pets. Humans are friends not food. Get with the program, Dracula. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vampsherifferic 2011-12-21 08:04 pm UTC (link)
	Vampires require blood to survive. It is rare for a vampire to keep a human by force. Most come to us willingly and ask to be our pets. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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rubber, 2011-12-21 08:06 pm UTC

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choseherside, 2011-12-21 08:10 pm UTC

	n7_spectre 2011-12-21 07:30 pm UTC (link)
	And he rides away on his vampire horse, with his vampire six-shooter! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rubber 2011-12-21 07:33 pm UTC (link)
	Off into the vampire sunset. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	n7_spectre 2011-12-21 07:34 pm UTC (link)
	To the sound of a vampire orchestra and some vampire narration about how he lives to fight another outlaw, another night, with his trusty were-hamster deputy by his side. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rubber 2011-12-21 07:52 pm UTC (link)
	Tune in next week for more of The Lone Vampire Ranger. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	n7_spectre 2011-12-22 12:33 am UTC (link)
	Hi- ho Silver! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	vampsherifferic 2011-12-21 07:49 pm UTC (link)
	Yes. There are were-tigers. There are also were-panthers too. Of course, the were species are lower than vampires. Vampires are the superior race. Sheriff. I ensure that all vampires in my area abide by the rules. If they disobey, they answer to me. And no. I can assure you there are no were-hamsters. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	n7_spectre 2011-12-21 07:54 pm UTC (link)
	No were- hamster? I'm disappointed. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rubber 2011-12-21 07:59 pm UTC (link)
	Me too. (Reply to this) (Parent)

rubber
2011-12-21 07:59 pm UTC (link)

That's just ridiculous. I mean, I've mocked plenty of things here, but that just takes the cake. And you should probably drop the superior race things. There are way more superior things here. That don't have to worry about fatal sunburns.

Well that's nice for you, but that won't fly here. I mean, I know I'm not planning on taking orders from any Sheriffs here. And anyway, this place is about as much your area as heterosexuality is Justin's. And I say that with the utmost love and affection for Justin. So...yeah. Just leave the Sheriff thing at home. Best thing for all parties.

That's strangely disappointing.

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