InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Clowns Hate Tangelos"

serefin "tranavia's greatest idiot" meleski (meleski) wrote in valloic,
@ 2021-09-26 09:23:00

Entry tags:

!: network post, assassin's creed: evie frye, assassin's creed: jacob frye, critical role: vax'ildan, the umbrella academy: diego hargreeves, wicked saints: ostyia rabalska, wicked saints: serefin meleski, ₴ inactive: wei wuxian

[FILTERED TO FRIENDS.]

I would like to see some of you, if you'll let me. And apologize in person. Much of it is still unclear in my mind ~~and I wish that it would stay that wa~~, but I own all of it. I thought about writing to you individually but I imagine it would be much of the same thing. ~~Begging for forgiveness, I imagine~~

~~[PRIVATE TO~~

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	meleski 2021-09-26 04:36 pm UTC (link)
	What I had for breakfast. Did you? ~~I could bring you something~~ ~~I will not poison your lunch~~ Will your sister allow you a lunch break? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brassknuckles 2021-09-26 04:45 pm UTC (link)
	She bloody well has to, love. There are laws about that sort of thing now. I'm ordering Chinese. I'll get enough for us both. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	meleski 2021-09-26 06:11 pm UTC (link)
	I thought that only applied to your employees, not the owners. I'm not complaining, mind you. I have been selfish with your time lately, so I would rather continue to be until you have realized you've fretted enough. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brassknuckles 2021-09-26 06:29 pm UTC (link)
	Quiet. You haven't been selfish with anything. You're recovering for fuck's sake. I had to convince myself not to keep shadowing you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	meleski 2021-09-26 06:33 pm UTC (link)
	~~I know you are just~~ You can keep shadowing me, I will just make it easier and be wherever you are. However, I did agree to go to the blood pool tomorrow, and will not take offense if you decided to skip that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brassknuckles 2021-09-26 06:48 pm UTC (link)
	Do you want me to come with you? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	meleski 2021-09-26 06:56 pm UTC (link)
	Want? Yes. But I am also aware that saddling you with more visuals of myself and blood so soon might not be something you would care for. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brassknuckles 2021-09-26 07:34 pm UTC (link)
	This one's healing you. Makes a big bleeding difference, yeah? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	meleski 2021-09-26 07:45 pm UTC (link)
	It does. ~~I just worry that you~~ Perhaps close your eyes if you change your mind while I'm in there. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brassknuckles 2021-09-26 07:55 pm UTC (link)
	Not really a close my eyes type. Or a change my mind type. It'll be alright. I just want to be where you need me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Jacob. meleski 2021-09-26 08:03 pm UTC (link)
	I currently plan to be eating Chinese food with you at the Underground, and we can figure out the other places I will need you after that. ~~Is it too much to say everywhere?~~ How is your throat? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. brassknuckles 2021-09-26 09:08 pm UTC (link)
	Alright. Good plan. Still hurts when I swallow, but I'll resist making an inappropriate joke. It's healing well enough. If the scar lingers, I'll talk to someone. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. meleski 2021-09-26 09:25 pm UTC (link)
	This is where I would make an inappropriate joke about leaving marks on one another. I always assumed it might be more of the metaphorical kind than physical. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. brassknuckles 2021-09-26 09:44 pm UTC (link)
	I definitely prefer the fun marks but we'll get back there in due time. I just don't want you looking at this one and thinking it's your fault. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. meleski 2021-09-26 10:06 pm UTC (link)
	Am I going to start a debate with you if I say it is sort of my fault? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. brassknuckles 2021-09-26 10:18 pm UTC (link)
	Yes. Would you have done any of this if you'd had half a choice? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. meleski 2021-09-26 10:24 pm UTC (link)
	If I had a choice, no. But I had a choice to say something sooner, or perhaps mentally protect myself from the possibility, and I did no such thing. ~~If I was stronger I might have been able to~~ I will not take all of the blame, but some. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. brassknuckles 2021-09-26 11:27 pm UTC (link)
	You locked him away - that was you protecting yourself. Even if you knew something was wrong with the box, what makes you think he'd have let you warn anyone? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. meleski 2021-09-26 11:52 pm UTC (link)
	I do not know, but I will also never know if I could have prevented this. And now I have broken so much trust with everyone, with you. Will your sister think it is safe for me not to be shadowed? Will Diego doubt my intentions anytime I pick up a blade? Will you ever share a glass of wine from me again? ~~Will you allow me to~~ (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Serefin/Jacob.

brassknuckles
2021-09-27 12:57 am UTC (link)

I can't tell you what the rest of them think. I can only tell you that we will find a way to rebuild trust. This place could replace any one of us with something mad! Somebody who can shapeshift could take my place and abuse your trust. Are we supposed to walk around distrusting each other now? I can't. I won't. I love you. The rest will just have to work itself out.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. meleski 2021-09-27 01:32 am UTC (link)
	~~But what about~~ And I love you. He would not have tried to kill you so many times if he believed you were not important to me. I just do not know how to begin on the working itself out parts or where the distrust starts or how deep it runs. If there is something that comes up, will you promise to tell me? I am terrible at guessing. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. brassknuckles 2021-09-27 02:00 am UTC (link)
	Flatterer. I promise. Let's just take this one day at a time. And maybe let me be the one to open the wine for a while, yeah? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. meleski 2021-09-27 02:41 am UTC (link)
	Ah, how lucky am I that you are far more durable than you let on. I can agree with that. If you intend on sniffing it at all, may I ask you to do it where cannot see? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Serefin/Jacob. brassknuckles 2021-09-27 02:53 am UTC (link)
	Maybe part of you didn't let him try all that hard either. You knew I had some poison experience and the right sight to spot that trap at the fire. Sure, love. Most of the better poisons are scentless anyway. If I'm not sniffing it to be a shit to your face, I probably won't bother at all. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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