Anne's brought to my attention that perhaps no one has asked you what the frak is going on with the Godboxes sending people to strange places all over the Universe.

She's in Middle Earth. I've got an idea about how to get to her. I certainly don't know if it will work, and I'd like to get her back here safely and ASAP.

( Anne )

Current Mood: confused

...Seriously? Of all the places for me to wind up. Here. Not France or the Orient, ohh NO. But this place. Just to be clear, I didn't mean to come here. Mexico? Really? I don't even know Spanish! Bloody hell, it's going to be difficult finding my way around now.

I was excited when I got here and it was all cold. Milan's nice and warm. But it's not Alaska, it's Iceland.

I have a headache still and I can't find Miss Jean or Big!Me

I think my godbox is broken. Maybe there's a virus?

[Broad text across godbox network]

Well this now is interesting. I was aiming for Wales and I end up here? Which given the information I was given by one of these locals is Orban? Which is apparently not Earth.
Anyone here with me? Anyone getting this at all?

Conversations with inept and uncooperative locals tell me I've arrived in a dismal, filthy place called New Caprica.

If this is the new one, I cringe to think what the old one looked like.

I seem to have taken a sudden left turn at I Don't Know Where and have been moved to somewhere in the middle of California. As far as useless technology goes, I should have been fine, but I can't seem to move myself, either.

I truly am stuck.

Malcolm? D'Kahn? I don't know how I'm getting home...

Well, now - this seems interesting. Can anyone tell me what to expect of this Tokyo? I believe I'm still on God's earth?

Mother Night - there's a hell of a lot of sand here...

Who fixes these godbox contraptions? This sure as hell is not the mountains.

I wanted to go to the market, but this... this is not the market. There are more people here than I've ever seen in my life. It's like Coruscant, only... not. What's going on with the godboxes?

OHMY- VOI LUOJA!

OKAY, so like, someone totally did something completely not right to my little phone thingy because I am like, NOWHERE near Malibu and like, even New York would have been okay since the Saks there is having a major shoe sale and these really awesome Christian Louboutains were going for like $1600 and that would have been a steal but now?!

Now, I'm like, in FINLAND. That's way up NORTH for people who don't know. SCAN-DI-NAVIA.

It couldn't have been like, Sweden or anything, no. It had to be the stupid one. I don't even get it. I was supposed to be on a SPACESHIP wearing a stupid BLUE DRESS and my NEW CHRISTIAN LOUBOUTAINS and now I'm stuck HERE.

This is such BULLSHIT!

... and I'm cold.

Current Mood: angry

..Wow, Godbox got upgrades? Because I was craving dim sum, wanted to go to the mechanics to fix my bike (sorry again!) and landed here in Bejing.

The most holy Lord of all demands I get shrimp rice noodles and steamed pork buns.  I can dig this.

What *is* this?

I set this box to take back to London, and this... this... device has landed me in ...Siberia?

... I take that back. There's a giant planet or moon in the sky. Where am I?

Whoops! ThatwasaweddingbacktherethatIspedinto. Sorry!

andwhyiseveryone/naked/!?!?

OOOHOTMUDBATHS

Um, this is my second time using this device to travel and even I can tell that it didn't work. This doesn't look like the coffee shop I discovered the other day...

Can anyone tell me where I am?

Current Mood: confused

I LOVE THIS PLANET.

Normally I'd be a bit more cross about missing the meeting of the Celestial Palace. Because listening to that old turtle drone for hours is my cup of tea.

But mud baths? And formal attire is nothing? Why can't I be the herald of this planet's sun?

Gigi, btw, I love you and didn't really mean that.

Okay, this isn't good.


[TEXT TO SAM]

Something is wrong with my Godbox. Stuck in some desert. Obvs Middle East. Blonde-haired/blue eyed is not a good thing.