Username: 
Password:    
Remember Me

Search by :  Username E-mail Region Interest AOL IM ICQ Number Yahoo! ID MSN Username Jabber

Helium Raven (severity_softly) wrote in pervy_werewolf, @ 2008-05-26 22:48:00

LMOM: An Intimate Alliance of Contradictions, part 24/29 (Remus/Peter, Remus/Severus)
Title: An Intimate Alliance of Contradictions, part 24/29 (I hope)
Rating: NC-17
Characters/Pairing (this part): Remus/Frank, unrequited Remus/Severus
Fandoms: Harry Potter/Little Miss Sunshine
Characters/Pairing (overall fic): Remus/Peter, Remus/Severus
Summary: "It would take too long to explain the intimate alliance of contradictions in human nature which makes love itself wear at times the desperate shape of betrayal. And perhaps there is no possible explanation." ~ Joseph Conrad
Kinks/Warnings: roleplaying (student/teacher fantasy), spanking
Overall warnings: Angst
Challenge: LMOM '08, day twenty-six
Word Count: 3700-ish
Notes: Finally back to POA! Whee! Aaaand realising I might be writing into June if I don't start cranking out longer chapters. Wish me luck! Thanks so so much to innerslytherin for the beta-reading!

Part 1 l Part 2 l Part 3 l Part 4 l Part 5 l Part 6 l Part 7 l Part 8 l Part 9 l Part 10 l Part 11 l Part 12 l Part 13 l Part 14 l Part 15 l Part 16 l Part 17 l Part 18 l Part 19 l Part 20 l Part 21 l Part 22 l Part 23 l Part 24

Frank read Remus Proust in bed. It started after another rousing shag that had led to both a murmured talk of Proust's treatment of homosexuality in his writing and a bemused look on Remus' face at the random literature lesson.

Frank smiled a self-deprecating smile and apologised a moment later, and Remus moved to nose Frank's jaw. "Don't be sorry," Remus whispered, "It's interesting."

That was all it took for Frank to bring over In Search of Lost Time on his next visit and start reading it aloud as Remus lay naked and half-awake in his arms.

They never really discussed what they were doing or what they got from one another, but they clearly they found each other beneficial on more than one level. Frank was older and, Remus conceded, wiser than him. It was always the smart ones that were so bloody hard on themselves, and Remus hoped he relieved at least some of Frank's burden. It was nice, too, Remus thought, to once again have someone constant in his life. And Frank, well, he did seem to be happy... happier than he was when Remus met him, at least.

Remus still avoided Dwayne at school, mostly because he didn't want to know if Frank had any other favourite new students, just like he doubted Frank wanted to know that Remus still went to the clubs on occasion, when the time between seeing Frank last and seeing Frank again seemed to stretch on too long.

Remus was afraid and he knew it. He was afraid to let Frank become too important to him. After Frank finally told him why he'd tried to kill himself, however, Remus thought Frank probably felt the same way.

Frank seemed to relish the authority he had when teaching, and his reading usually ended in long-winded conversation (well monologue, really, as Remus tended to just listen) about what he'd just read. Remus wondered if it was why he'd taken up with students in the first place, and quickly offered Frank the same level of authority with him. He'd let Frank tie him up on all fours and spank him until Remus' arse was raw, all while whimpering promises that he'd do better on his next 'oral exam.'

"Professor Ginsberg," Remus whispered into Frank's ear one night. It was about one in the morning, but Remus was wide awake.

Frank blinked at Remus groggily, and smiled slowly, still mostly asleep. "Mmph, Remus, it's the middle of the night."

Remus grinned and kissed Frank, who was still too asleep to do anything but kiss back too late. The only disadvantage of older men, Remus had decided, was that you couldn't convince them to have sex whenever and wherever you wanted.

"I know," Remus murmured. He kissed Frank's jaw and neck. "Did I ever tell you I went to a private school?"

Frank blinked a little harder this time before he made an unintelligible noise, then mumbled, "Did you have to wear a uniform?"

Remus breathed a laugh, because that was exactly what he was hoping to hear, and stroked his hand over Frank's partially hard cock through his pants. "Yes. I'd wear one for you, if you wanted."

Frank groaned and rocked up against Remus' hand, even as he mumbled, "s'too late for this. Have t'teach at seven."

Remus pushed Frank's pants down and curled his fingers around Frank's prick. "Would you like that, professor? Could gag me with my tie, push me over the desk, pull my trousers down and fuck me into the wood..."

Frank tried to protest again, but all that came out was, "Mmmphnnnaah," as Remus slid down his body and sucked his cock into his mouth.

The very next day, Frank had shown up at Remus' flat with a private school uniform, looking tired from lack of sleep the night before. He had every intention of making Remus' suggestions come true, however, and in less than a half an hour, Remus was bent over his study desk. He was fully dressed in the uniform Frank had brought, except for the way his trousers and pants were pulled down from behind, exposing his arse. The uniform tie had long since been balled up and shoved in his mouth, and all Remus could manage to do was whimper through the wad of fabric.

His hands were clutching the opposite corners of the desk as Frank's hand came down on his arse. "You failed your exam, Mr. Lupin."

I'm sorry, Remus said, but it sounded more like "Mmy mowwy."

"There is no excuse for failing," Frank went on, and his hand came down again. Remus made a muffled cry, his hips first drawing in and away from the slap and then relaxing back, after he caught his breath.

It might have been funny that this was what Frank liked if it wasn't so fucking gorgeous. Frank was a genuinely unassuming and gentle man, who loathed his brother-in-law's sense of 'only losers fail' (he'd expounded upon it on more than one occasion), but like this, with Remus' arse on display and all for Frank, Frank was in charge.

Frank's hand smoothed over Remus where he'd just been smacked, causing Remus' skin to prickle, and once the warmth of Frank's hand soothed the burn, he smacked Remus skin again. This time Remus screamed through the makeshift gag, pulling away from the sting until Frank's finger slid inside him. He pushed back against it, feeling sweat break across his forehead.

"How are you prepared to make up for it?" Frank asked, and Remus tried to answer, but only managed a garbled string of consonants. "I didn't understand that," Frank said. "I think you need a good fucking."

Frank pulled the tie out of Remus' mouth. "Yes, please," Remus begged, his prick full and straining against the way his trousers were still zipped in the front.

"Yes, please, what?"

"Please, Professor Ginsberg. Please fuck me," Remus whimpered.

Frank slid inside Remus in one swift push that made Remus cry out and grip the desk harder, his knuckles going white as Frank quickly started to thrust, driving into Remus with enough force that the desk started to slide under them. Frank's hand came down against Remus' arse again. Remus screamed and arched his back, and Frank's hand fisted itself in Remus' hair and pulled, forcing Remus' body to stay in that position. "Fuck, fuck, professor," Remus panted. "So-- fucking-- hard!"

Frank pulled at Remus' hair once hard and then groaned, and Remus felt the body behind him still as Frank came. As soon as Frank pulled out, Remus slid to his knees. Frank pinned Remus' hands to the desk, and Remus looked up at Frank. "Please touch me," he said, his hips thrusting against the minimal friction he was getting from his trousers.

Frank bent and kissed him, which was awkward upside down, but still sent more and more need racing through Remus. He made a needy noise against Franks' mouth and squirmed, but didn't try to pull his hands out from under Frank's.

"What do you say?" Frank murmured.

"Frank, please," Remus whispered desperately.

"What was that?"

"Please, professor," Remus begged.

Frank's fingers circled Remus' wrists and pulled Remus' hands behind him, pressing them together in a silent command to clasp them there. Remus obeyed, and then found the tie shoved back in his mouth. He moaned around it when Frank licked over his neck, jerking roughly at his trousers and pants, and when Frank swallowed his cock, Remus cried out one last time and came into the wet heat.

Later, when they were sprawled back on the floor, Frank gave Remus a goofy, lazy grin. "I can't believe you let me do that."

Remus smiled and kissed him. "I like you," he said, and wrapped his arms around Frank. "Now tell me more about that Frenchman you like so well."





Remus was glad they kept it simple. All good things in Remus' life tended to end rather abruptly, but at least when Frank left, there were no tears. Still, when Frank had told him they needed to talk, Remus irrationally felt as though he was being dumped at first. Then he reminded himself he couldn't actually be dumped in this case.

Frank had accepted a teaching job in Arizona, and was moving. He looked genuinely upset at having to leave Remus behind, and Remus had genuinely been inclined to follow Frank. Ultimately, his fear kicked in again, and Remus let Frank say his goodbyes.

"I love you, you know," Frank said, his fringe sticking to his forehead after having shagged Remus rotten that night. His tone was casual, and Remus knew what sort of love Frank meant.

It was mutual, though. Remus didn't think he was in love with Frank, but he certainly had grown to love him in his own way. He climbed on top of Frank and kissed him. "I know." He stroked his fingers down Frank's face. "I love you too. Best friendship I've had in my adult life."

Frank snorted. "You're still a kid. Wait until you hit forty-five."

"I'm bloody thirty. Shut up, old man," Remus had quipped and kissed Frank again.

They saw each other on occasion, when Frank came in to visit relatives. Remus was tempted many times to take a day trip to Mesa, but never could. He told himself he was being foolish. He went back to the clubs and tried to convince himself he was happy getting fucked by strange men again, but somehow the excitement was lost. He'd needed all that nearly a decade earlier, needed the escape, but one bloody teenager that looked like Peter had introduced him to someone that reminded him what it was he wanted all along, from the very beginning: something real.

Sometimes, Remus found himself wondering if Peter was orchestrating the whole thing from wherever he was when Remus watched Dwayne leave the campus in the afternoons.

The years passed as they always did, with occasional visits from Frank and regular sex from irregular men. It was a hot August night when Remus' life took another swing in a direction he didn't expect. He'd been at the club most of the night, and wound up with two rather fit blokes who were more than willing to drive his inebriated arse home.

They'd all three toppled into bed once they got there and spent the night touching and sucking and fucking each other raw until they were all three slick with sweat and come. They were slumped in a tangle of limbs, half asleep, when the knock came at Remus' front door. He blinked and then shifted out from under his companions.
"Where are you--?"

"Knock," Remus answered groggily, "Front door." He pulled on his pyjama bottoms, wondering who the hell would come by this late, and did a furtive Scourgify on himself as he opened the door, praying it wasn't Frank.

Of course, Frank would have been welcome, once Remus realised who was really on the other side.

Albus Dumbledore was peering down at Remus, dressed in brightly coloured Muggle clothes. "Hello, dear boy."

Remus shifted his weight and crossed his arms over his bare chest. "Um..."

"You coming back to bed, honey?" one of the men called from his bedroom.

Oh God. Well, Remus was officially out of the closet to one of the most powerful wizards in the world now. He closed his eyes and wished he could disappear. Albus didn't say a word, though, and Remus slipped outside and shut the door behind him. "What are you-- How did you find me?"

"How are you finding yourself?" Albus asked mildly, but the question caused a frown on Remus's face. "You know as well as I do, Remus, that it's easy to track men with your condition as long as they continue to abide by the rules and regulations put upon them," Albus answered belatedly. "I didn't suspect you would become reckless where that was concerned."

Remus sighed and leaned against the wall of his flat, then did a quick silencing charm when a lewd noise sounded through the door. "It's two in the bloody morning," he grumbled.

"I apologise, Remus. I've just had breakfast, and it was the only time I had to spare to come here."

"Mind that seven hour time difference," Remus muttered and then looked back at Albus. "Why are you here?"

"Because I'd like to offer you a teaching job," Albus said, his eyes twinkling at Remus.

Remus stared at him, disbelieving, and then shook his head, his lips curving into a grim smile. "I haven't seen you in over a decade and you show up in the middle of the night to offer me a job?" he said.

"Yes," Albus replied. He seemed nearly amused by Remus' reaction and Remus had to fight his irritation.

Remus stared at the wall and tried to loosen the sudden tension in his jaw. "I've been living in a Muggle neighborhood and teaching at a Muggle school for years now, Albus."

"Just like riding a bike."

"What if I say I don't want to go back?" Remus asked.

"I would say that you can't very well hide for the rest of your life," Albus returned.

That did it. "I lost everything," Remus snapped finally, though clenched teeth. He turned his gaze back on Albus. "I lost everyone. You made me a murderer for nothing, and everything I loved is gone."

Albus dropped his eyes to the ground for a moment, the briefest sign of remorse flitting across his features and then disappearing. "He's back, Remus."

It took a moment for the words to sink in, but once they did, Remus felt his entire body go cold. He shook his head automatically. "He can't be," he breathed.

Albus just looked back up and fixed Remus with a look that was somehow mild and stern at the same time, a look which conveyed that what Albus was saying was very much a reality. "You haven't been keeping up with Wizarding news, have you?"

Remus shook his head.

"Did you know Harry will be attending his third year at Hogwarts this coming year?"

Remus' jaw clenched. Once he had gotten some distance from the war, he'd seen how easily he had let Albus manipulate him in the past. Remus had walked straight into Greyback's pack for Albus, when it went against everything Remus felt was right at the time. He knew that Albus knew what mentioning Harry would do to Remus. "Damn it, Albus, I have a life here!" he snapped, but somewhere in the back of his mind he knew it was never the life he wanted. And now that Frank was gone, there really wasn't much here for him.

Not for the first time, Remus wondered how subtle Albus' Legilimency could be, because he didn't feel anything different, but Albus asked, "Is this all you wanted?" anyway. "He's the spitting image of James," he went on, "with Lily's eyes."

Remus drew a breath, looking anywhere but at Albus, though he could see out of the corner of his eye that Albus was still watching him.

"I'm attempting to pull together some key Order members, just to be prepared," Albus said, then paused, and when he spoke again his voice was soft. "Help me protect him."

"Albus, I'm not even allowed to teach if I go back."

Albus looked at him for a long moment, tilting his head thoughtfully. "Remus, my boy..." He shook his head. "You really have been doing yourself a great disservice by keeping yourself so distant from the Wizarding world. Have you not heard of the Wolfsbane potion?"

Remus finally looked back at Albus, but he just stared. Wolfsbane? He shook his head.

Albus smiled. "It's new. It would allow you to keep your human mind whilst transformed each month."

Remus was still staring at Albus, barely hearing what he was saying. This was a dream. It had to be a bloody dream.

"There are very few who can brew it properly, and I happen to have one of them teaching Potions at the school. Severus has agreed to brew it for you should you return."

"Seve--" Remus breathed. Oh, well, now he knew he really was dreaming.

"Oh! Dear me, I almost forgot," Albus said. It would have sounded almost sweet and grandfatherly, if it weren't for the look that accompanied the words. Albus looked at him with deep sadness and sympathy in his eyes. "Sirius Black escaped from Azkaban last month."

Remus felt the ground fall out from underneath him. He found himself shaking his head before he could form words, but eventually managed to stammer, "It's-- it's not-- possible."

Albus' lips pulled into a thin line. "It is," he said.

"I..." Remus started, but then he didn't know what to say. What could he possibly say?

Albus nodded. "Think about it. I'll expect a response in a few days." He reached out and patted Remus' cheek. "I do wish that you will accept my offer, but if not, do look into competent brewers around here and..." He darted a significant glance at the door of Remus' flat. "Take care of yourself."

Remus barged into his flat and slammed the door, trying to quell the swirl of emotion racing through him. It took less than fifteen minutes after Albus left for Remus to kick two groggy and thoroughly put out, nearly-naked men out of his flat. However, five hours later, Remus was still pacing his front room. His eyes burned and he probably stank of alcohol - in fact, he probably looked like shit when Albus had been by too - but he hardly cared. It was at least lucky it was a weekend.

It was eight o'clock in the morning when Remus finally sat down, heavy-eyed, and penned a note.

Dear Frank,

I'm going to be leaving the States next week for a teaching position in Scotland. It is likely that I won't be returning. At least not anytime soon.

I would love to see you before I go.

Love,
Remus





It was weird being back in Scotland. Remus had grown used to the flat, sometimes twangy, southwestern American accents, and the dry desert landscape over the last few years. He took his first trip in four years to Loch Ness, and talked to Peter before arriving at the school to an unexpectedly warm reception. He walked into the staff meeting room, and someone shouted, "Remus Lupin!"

Remus darted a glance over and saw Minerva walking towards him. She looked a bit like she wanted to hug him, but wasn't sure she should. Hagrid solved that a moment later, though, when he thudded over and hugged Remus hard enough to nearly crush him, lifting Remus off his feet. "Blimey, Remus," Hagrid said, and a huge tear hit Remus' shoulder before he was placed clumsily back down.

He coughed, and rubbed his crushed chest. "Merlin."

"Don't Merlin us, young man, we haven't seen you in ages," Minerva chided.

As she talked, Remus rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, and scanned the room. His smile slid when his eyes fell on Severus, who was sitting across the room, staring at Remus, expressionless. Remus' lips parted. He wondered if he should say something. Then Albus cleared his throat and called the first staff meeting of the school year to order.





It was well past midnight (though it still felt like tea time to Remus) when he heard his office door open behind him.

"Well, the only remaining member of the golden four returns."

Remus turned around to see Severus standing in his doorway. God, he looked good. He'd grown into his nose and his lanky body had filled out a bit. "Severus," Remus said, smiling, though he wasn't quite sure what to expect after so long had passed. "Are you implying that I was received so well today because of some lingering pity? Poor Lupin, gone for twelve years, wallowing in his sorrow?"

"Ever the quick one," Severus drawled.

"Ever the bastion of hope," Remus countered. He tilted his head. "I must admit that I was surprised to see you here, of all places."

"Probably as surprised as I was to find myself here twelve years ago." Severus took a step into the room and closed the door behind him.

Remus glanced up, surprised, but he didn't say anything. He just set about unpacking more of his things and wondering if the House Elves would mind making him something to eat this late at night, considering he was still Apparition-lagged and was bloody starving.

"Where have you been, Lupin?" Severus asked.

"America," Remus said.

"Doing what?"

"Teaching," Remus replied, then his lips quirked a little and he looked back up at Severus. "And wallowing in my sorrow, as previously indicated."

"More grey hair to prove it."

Remus stopped what he was doing and looked up, suddenly wanting to ask why Severus was here. He hadn't explained himself. He'd just walked in. In the middle of the night. Remus swallowed and crossed the room, stopping just a foot in front of Severus. Which was a bad idea in retrospect, because he hadn't forgotten what Severus could do to him, and Severus was even better looking now.

"I'm not seventeen anymore," Remus murmured, his voice low due to their proximity.

Severus' black eyes burned into Remus' for a moment, and Remus held his gaze, wishing his stomach didn't feel fluttery. Damn it, what was it about Severus that after all these years...

Severus started to lean in, and Remus' heart thudded violently in his chest, and suddenly the memory of Frank flooded his mind, along with the memory of all that Frank had reminded Remus he wanted and everything Severus had thrown away so many years ago. Remus turned his head before Severus reached his lips, but Remus reached up and pressed his hand to Severus' chest to keep him from leaving.

Remus ducked his head and caught Severus' eyes. "And I'm not as easily thrown away anymore, either."


Part 25