InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Poor Queequeg."

Elenwë of the Vanyar (vanya_elenwe) wrote in compass_network,
@ 2013-04-21 13:59:00

Entry tags:

!open

Filtered to Adults
I am only curious. And do not feel you have to answer, if you do not wish to do so.

My question concerns those of you who have had old loves show up here, or those of you who have shown up in this place and found your loves with someone else. This is...strange to me, as I have explained before, but that is not what this is about.

I wonder only how many of you still loved the other when you arrived here? And how long you have been here. And how you replaced them so easily.

And also, do any of you have loves back home that you have remained faithful to?

[OOC: Trigger warning. Mentions of rape in comments]

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	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 08:31 pm UTC (link)
	This post is asking for information. I do not understand. I wish to know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lexwinter 2013-04-21 08:34 pm UTC (link)
	This post is dragging up a lot of hurt feelings and general pain for, I'm guessing, quite a lot of people. Why don't you just wait until things aren't so raw? It's not like you're gonna run out of time. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 08:36 pm UTC (link)
	As I said, I am curious. I wish only to learn and understand. And I find there is never a time when things are not raw for someone. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lexwinter 2013-04-21 08:40 pm UTC (link)
	I'll give you this little bit of understanding for free: two days is way too soon for most people. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 08:43 pm UTC (link)
	Ah, but if you are like your peers you have nothing to grieve. You will fall in love again soon enough. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lexwinter 2013-04-21 08:47 pm UTC (link)
	Ouch. That's a bit fucking harsh! (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 10:27 pm UTC (link)
	And yet true, apparently. Is this not the way it usually works for humans? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lexwinter 2013-04-21 10:36 pm UTC (link)
	We're not all the fucking same, you know. ~~We don't all randomly fall in love with the firs~~ ~~Some of us don't just get over~~ ~~You have no idea how~~ ~~How the fuck am I supposed to get over~~ (Reply to this) (Parent)

	lexwinter 2013-04-21 10:37 pm UTC (link)
	And I already told you; I'm not human. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 10:37 pm UTC (link)
	Mortals, then. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	lexwinter 2013-04-21 11:01 pm UTC (link)
	So all mortals are alike in your opinion? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 11:03 pm UTC (link)
	In my limited experience, I see little difference. I should be glad to be proven wrong. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

lexwinter
2013-04-21 11:22 pm UTC (link)

Well that's the point. Your experience is limited. You don't know me. You don't know Grey. Your basis for judging us is what we've chosen to write on a public message board which, if you didn't know, probably isn't our deepest, darkest feelings. How do you know I'm so different from you? How do you know that my love isn't lost forever now (Grey, I know you're reading this and I know this is awkward ~~because it's true~~ but please don't turn it into a massive issue) that Grey and I have broken up? How do you know that I'm gonna get a second chance? Because, I'll tell you what, it doesn't fucking feel like it right now.

And that's the point I was making earlier. I really don't want to be having this conversation right now. My head really hurts, my heart really hurts, I feel like vomiting my guts up from the amount of vodka I've drunk this weekend but, for some reason - maybe I'm just masochistic - I actually can't stop myself reading this, even though it's making things ten times worse for me.

Your timing sucks. The fact that you ignored my subtle hint to perhaps save this for a later date is bad enough but then you go and belittle how crap I'm feeling by telling me, essentially, that I'll get over it. Not only is that rude, it's hurtful too.

I'm not fickle and I really doubt I'm gonna just forget about Grey like you seem to think I'm going to. I've loved one girl in my whole life, just like you've had one love, so could you just back the fuck off and let me grieve for losing that love in peace for, I don't know, maybe a little longer than two days before carrying on with your quest for knowledge?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

vanya_elenwe
2013-04-21 11:25 pm UTC (link)

I have no desire to cause you pain. If I have been less sensitive than I should have been it is because I have been angry at the way I have been treated in this post and I am sorry for that.

I think it best for you to stop reading this post.

I am sorry that it brings you pain, but there will never be a time I can post it when it will not hurt someone. Do you see?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

lexwinter
2013-04-21 11:36 pm UTC (link)

Okay, so why didn't you just take this post down as soon as I intimated that it was hurting me?

And, if you've been treated badly in this post, it's because the whole thing, the fact that you thought it was actually okay to post it in the first place, is so completely misjudged that it's provoked an automatic backlash from all the people whose feelings have been trampled on in the last few days.

But I'm just repeating myself now, and you're clearly not understanding what I'm saying, so I'm just going to stop. All I will say, sure, "someone" might be hurt whenever you post something provocative but, right now, I think it's pretty obvious that a lot of people will get hurt by it. So either you're aiming to upset as many people as possible, or you really do just have absolutely no understanding of anyone else's emotions. Only you can ever really know which. Either way, that's something you might what to look at before trying to fathoms the mysteries of other people.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 11:39 pm UTC (link)
	Or perhaps I am simply as unlikable as I am beginning to feel. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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lexwinter, 2013-04-22 12:40 am UTC

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vanya_elenwe, 2013-04-22 01:37 am UTC

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lexwinter, 2013-04-22 01:42 am UTC

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vanya_elenwe, 2013-04-22 01:44 am UTC

	greywhite 2013-04-21 08:47 pm UTC (link)
	You need to stop talking about things you don't understand. And yes I am over-defensive. Do you want to know why? Because you're upsetting the people I care about. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 10:28 pm UTC (link)
	I thought you were finished talking to me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	greywhite 2013-04-21 10:29 pm UTC (link)
	So I did I, apparently not. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 10:31 pm UTC (link)
	I liked your silence better. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	greywhite 2013-04-21 10:32 pm UTC (link)
	I'm sure you did. But here's the thing - you don't get what you want in this place. No one does. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	vanya_elenwe 2013-04-21 10:35 pm UTC (link)
	Except apparently you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

greywhite
2013-04-21 10:39 pm UTC (link)

You think I'm getting what I want? Seriously? Jesus I thought you were stupid before, it's amazing how you can outdo yourself.

You know nothing about me, you know nothing about my fucking species, taking an interest is one thing, in fact taking an interest is great, only you're not doing that, you're making huge generalisations about something you know nothing about, in a really hurtful way. Here's the thing - not all people are the same, right?

And I trying to be nice here, but when you're upsetting people I'm not just going to sit here and let it happen, and if you're doing it accidentally then just consider this me telling you what you're doing.

Unless you're trying to be a heartless bitch, but I actually got the impression that wasn't your intention.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

vanya_elenwe
2013-04-21 10:41 pm UTC (link)

Oh? And here I thought you had the man you loved here with you. And you can speak even when I wish for you to be gone, and you can insult me all that you like.

I think that you are getting everything you like, yes.

No, I do not know you. I asked questions and you responded with hostility and crass language. What am I supposed to think? You are one of the first mortals I have ever spoken to, and you are not giving me a positive opinion.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

greywhite
2013-04-21 10:50 pm UTC (link)

So I have one good thing and that means I'm getting what I want? Jesus how fucking simplistic is your life? You don't have to keep talking to me, you're aware of that, right?

Then you're fucking clueless. You know nothing about me, apart from the fact that I get massively pissed off when someone I don't even know thinks they know more about my relationships than I do. And yes I am angry, because you're making a bad situation worse and when this is pointed out to you you don't actually seem to care.

I responded with hostility because you're generalisations are offensive. Well in that case I apologise, seriously. I'm actually quite a nice person when someone isn't questioning my morals and doesn't come across as completely narrow minded. And as I've pointed out people are different. I'm sure you'll get on much better with people who haven't just had to break someone they loved's heart.

You have no idea what this is like for us. Count yourself lucky.

And get a better sense of timing.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

(no subject) -

vanya_elenwe, 2013-04-21 10:55 pm UTC

Elenwë -

turukano, 2013-04-21 11:00 pm UTC

Turukáno -

vanya_elenwe, 2013-04-21 11:03 pm UTC