5. What is one of the biggest losses you have experienced and how did it change you?

The greatest loss I ever experienced was the loss of my wife Alison.  It was out of the blue and honestly, I'm not sure I have reconciled it in my head. She was run down while posting my pools... because she was wearing someone else's coat. The bastard behind the wheel meant to kill someone else.

I didn't realise it at the time but what that did to me was deep and far reaching. I lost all touch with "normal" life. I didn't have a lifeline to the regular folk, the non villans, women who wren't strippers or tarts... and it took the ring off my finger. Now mind the ring being there was never much of a deterrant. I dallied a tad but I always went back. Because I was married and I take that seriously, even if I still did window shop.  But with her gone, all I had left was Jack. I began to slip down the same slope as he was doing... all work, all the time. And maybe a bit of each other when the guilts didn't overwhelm him.

That's not a good life, constant boozing, fighting, smoking, eating crap food from greasy cafes, not sleeping normal hours... And I no longer had anyone to tell me to stop it. I was turning into a hard, cynical, alcoholic, workaholic because I didn't have anything else.

Muse: George Carter
Fandom: The Sweeney

1. Birthdays.

I like birthdays! Mine, family, friends. Best excuse for a piss up. Don't get cake anymore, that's for the kids. Now I get as much whisky as I can consume and, if I'm lucky, a good shag. Or a bad shag. Don't matter, really. As long as there's a shag.

My birthday is about making it through another year in one piece. Some of my mates haven't been so lucky, but I have. And I'm celebrating that. To the fullest,

Family birthdays are to make Mum happy. And if Mum ain't happy, no one is. So trust us, we make her happy.

Friend's birthdays are a chance to meet birds. And with my friends they only know birds who'll shag you senseless then get bored with you in just the right amount of time. I know I'm only a side bit for these girls. They want a husband who works regular hours and doesn't get shot at. I'm not that bloke. But I will take the shag.

Jack don't come to these dos anymore, which is good. He gets jealous and won't let me pick up anyone but then don't want to put out himself. That gets bloody annoying I can tell you, so I'm happy he stays home. Well not happy, exactly, but relieved.

I like birthdays. There's a party and I do like a party.

Fandom: The Sweeney
Character: Sgt. George Carter

3. A silence that won't go away

There's the unspoken between me and Jack. The unspoken that we have to act like nothing's going on, that he don't mean as much to me as he does, the fact that I've twigged he feels the same...

It's hard. I mean these days no one thinks a thing about a widower and a divorced bloke being close. We've got the loss of a loved one to share. We're both coppers so it's hard to meet nice girls. Although to be truthful, I make much more of an effort than Jack does. Still, it's not like everyone will instantly think we're a couple of nancies, I mean look at us. But he lives in fear of that and I guess I should too, but I can't. I don't think anything's wrong with it. If I did, I wouldn't indulge.

The silence hurts me though. I want more I think, than what we have. That surprised me a bit, but looking back over recent months I can see where I'm not on the prowl like I used to be. I'd rather be with him, moods, fits of denial and bad treatment all. Reckon that's the love part. Now I know why it's the Love that dare not speak its name. Too much fear.

So the silence perpetuates the fear. Which makes for more silence.

I wonder if one day that'll change?


Fandom: The Sweeney
Character: Sgt. George Carter

Least favourite memory... You'd think it would be Alison, but it's not. It was the sight of Vic Tolman with his gun to Jack's head. For a minute there, I simply couldn't think. I don't think I'd ever been that panicked before. Then Jack looked right at me. And I do mean right at me. It was... wild and mad. I knew right then that if Tolman did anything, anything at all to hurt Jack, I'd kill him. And I'd do it without remorse or hesitation. So I told him he'd need an embalmer, not a brief. His hold got stronger and it terrified me. Jack was struggling and I had the lads behind me so I had to be calm and in charge. I did that. I kept the lads focused even though Tolman was dragging Jack off by the neck. My hands were so cold I could barely feel them. That and I was shaking. Thommo commented on it later but he thought it was rage. He missed the terror part.

The sight of Tolman belting Jack a good one and stuffing him into the drivers seat of that car, and me helpless to stop it. Not knowing if I'd get him back alive. That was the worst.

Muse: Sgt. George Carter
Fandom: The Sweeney

5. Write about a forbidden activity.

The thing is, I'm not sure why it's forbidden. I mean, I'm not married now and neither is he. The Act was changed in 1967 for Pete's sake. I don't know why it is criminal in the first place. Why is it anyone's business what two consenting adults get up to? I mean it's not like we're cottaging. Well I don't, but I suspect from some of Jack's grasses, he might still troll about. He says it's in aid of getting more grasses he has a hold over, but I don't really believe that. Especially after dealing with that toad Stickley. Bastard was too smug by half. Not that I'm proprietary or anything but I didn't like the way he presumed.

Anyways, I don't see why it should be forbidden for two fellas to enjoy one another's company. But I'm not the one making the law, I'm just the one upholding it. Mostly.


Muse: Sgt. George Carter
Fandom: The Sweeney

Prompt Week 9

2. On the eve of the funeral.

We bury her tomorrow, my Alison. I know I'm still in shock because I expect to see her at any minute. I expect to hear her giving me the business for leaving the closet doors open or not putting my teacup in the sink. Only that's not going to happen ever again and it makes me shake to realise it.

The house is too quiet. Well not exactly quiet, just not right. Every sound I make seems to reverberate and bounce back at me, reminding me that the house is empty now. It'll be even emptier soon as I can't stay there. Can't afford it now. It'll be packing up everything soon, not just her things.

So much to do and I can't even really think straight. Fortunately Mum's taken charge of much of it. Even if I could take the compassion leave, I wouldn't know where to begin. She'd done most of this already with Dad. I'm sorry she's got to do it again. Sorry but grateful.

I've never been on my own before. It's rotten. I miss her. And God help the villain that ran her down. Because when I find him....


Muse: Sgt. George Carter
Fandom: The Sweeney

5. Night is falling. You're not at home.

The light is fading, just like me. I've been on the job since 7am and that's with only 5 hours sleep the night before. I can't wait till this bleedin obbo is over so I can sleep for a week. Sitting here in a closed van with the lads is not my idea of an evening's entertainment. Unless, of course, Murray and his firm arrive... Then we can hand out the kickings. Nothing cheers a fellow up like giving a villain a good kicking. Then going out to the boozer for afters.

With my luck, though, it'll just be siting here till close to midnight again. No birds, no booze and Tom tellin the same stupid jokes as last night.

Don't look like we've got any tea either.


Muse: Sgt. George Carter
Fandom: The Sweeney

Prompt Week Five
5. You hear a siren.

Nothing unusual there. I'm generally in the car that's making the noise. If you run when you hear one, I want to know what naughties you've been up to.

2. If you could completely start your life over from scratch, what would you do differently the second time around (if anything)? Why?

Different... Hmm. Nothing and Everything... not that that's an answer of course. Seeing what I see now, I'd have done a bit more in school. Education really does make a difference. The Fifth Floor don't take you serious if you seem uneducated, particularly if you don't speak posh. Not sure I could speak posh, though. But what else? Well I'd have nailed that Betty Farmer sooner. Cor, but that was something. And for all that I do love her, I'm not so sure I'd have got married. Policing is hard on wives. Particularly on well-educated, career minded ones. The job turns them sour and really, its not fair. Some take to it, but not many. Mine didn't and she didn't take to Jack either. Was her that got me out of the Sweeney first time around. Drove her mental when I went back. She didn't understand that it was something I needed to do. It's in me. I catch villains. Hard villains. It wasn't Jack, like she thought. Well not, totally Jack... It's the work. The work that makes it work getting up every morning. Policing isn't a job, it's who you are. That's something I'd never change.

Muse: Sgt. George Carter
Fandom: The Sweeney

1. "What will happen can't be stopped."
2. Dubious intentions.
3. Write about something that made you cry.
4. These are the lies I told you.

George woke feeling as though his tongue were covered in fur. He rubbed his eyes to try and get them unglued but he wasn't actually sure he wanted to open them. That bottle of whisky Jack had brought had taken a big toll, as if he wasn't already worn out from grief. The worst was how the spot next to him was empty, twice over.

He knew Jack wasn't going to stay. That simply wasn't on the table. He didn't know exactly what Jack wanted from him save for the obvious, but even there he wasn't totally sure. From the beginning he'd known they'd end up in bed, him married or no. It was just one of those things you knew, but didn't really know why. Well, on his end he did. Jack was every button that a person could push, but he didn't know what was happening in Jack's mind. Jack told him he cared, that he needed George. He'd come with a bottle and a friend's shoulder but he took much more than that away with him. George had let himself believe the lie because he needed the comfort, the illusion, at least, that there was still someone there. He'd really known better, of course, but fresh tears still welled up.

"You was right, Alison. Not that you'd be best pleased to know it."

The pillow smelled of both of them, he just held it and wept.


Fandom:The Sweeney
Character: Sgt. George Carter

Acceptable losses.

There's a hard one. Sometimes it's not casualties, like in wars, but other things. I've seen it with Jack and I've started to see it with me. It starts out as wanting to do your job well, protect the public and that. Then it just starts taking over. What did Jack once say?... "You'd think Jack Regan was the only copper in London!" That after the umteenth interrupted dinner, the umteenth call in at 2am, the umteeth broken date. It's really us, the coppers who are the casualties. Our lives.

The job eats us up. We start out like everyone else, family, hobbies, aspirations, then the lure of being needed, making a difference, protecting people, eats us up. Who needs us more, out family or the greater public? The good of the many and that. We don't even question it until there's nothing left of us but the job. It cuts away everything that doesn't further its goals until something happens and you realise you're alone, with nothing but the job. No life outside catching the blaggers. No time for anything but the barest sleep. Even food is a luxury most days. The job consumes you in the furtherance of the common good.

Is that acceptable? To lose everything for the safety of the public?
I reckon so or I wouldn't be in this job.


character: Sgt. George Carter
fandom: The Sweeney

My name is George Carter. I'm a Detective Sergeant in the Flying Squad and my DI is Jack Regan. I was born in South London in 1948 and grew up with a large portion of the villains I now nick. There but the grace of god an that. I'm a Chelsea supporter through and through. I'm a widower but looking, not that I'm getting anywhere, and my mum and sisters live close by, but my dad is gone. I get along with everyone unless they give me reason not to and I love doing policing. That and I'm rubbish at this sort of introduction... Sounds like I'm standing up in church for something... Anyway, its easiest to just think of me as George, that nice bloke who nicks the blaggers.

Muse: George Carter
Fandom: The Sweeney
Words: 130