InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "AND NOW HE WILL RISE!!!"

daisy johnson is (neveragoodfit) wrote in welcomenetwork,
@ 2016-05-20 16:54:00

Entry tags:

daisy johnson / quake (mcu), grant ward, kara lynn palamas / agent 33, leo fitz, sterling archer

Avoiding the internet is not exactly easy. And there's a part of me that's curious to find out what is going on back home, only a small part but it's there. I'm just glad that the show isn't on the air anymore so I don't have to worry about getting it thrown in my face without warning during commercials.

[Filtered to Archer]
We need a date night, just the two of us.

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	neveragoodfit 2016-05-21 07:44 pm UTC (link)
	Maybe Ward should explain that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	agent33 2016-05-21 07:47 pm UTC (link)
	Probably. But I'm not asking Grant right now. I'm asking you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neveragoodfit 2016-05-21 07:50 pm UTC (link)
	Things got worse, for all of us. Ward, he went... well he went somewhere really bad. He kidnapped and tortured Jemma and Fitz. Tried to bring back the HYDRA 'god' and Coulson stopped him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	agent33 2016-05-21 07:55 pm UTC (link)
	It's really that easy for you to lie isn't it? He was happy. I mean not... he was in a better place. He was doing what he thought was best for me leaving me with all of you, even if he was wrong about that. But I know he'd never have hurt Fitz. He'd never have done that. And he wasn't HYDRA. Not anymore. So tell me the truth now (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neveragoodfit 2016-05-21 07:59 pm UTC (link)
	I wish I was lying but ask him. He'll tell you it's all true. You really need to talk to him about all of this. And he didn't hurt Fitz physically, it was mental torture with him. Jemma, that was physical. But you're not going to believe me so ask him. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	agent33 2016-05-21 08:18 pm UTC (link)
	~~I don't want to a~~ He'd never have gone back to HYDRA. He knows what they did to me. He helped me, why the hell would he ever go back. Whatever else you think he did, that's insane (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neveragoodfit 2016-05-21 08:22 pm UTC (link)
	He didn't go back, he took over. After we'd wiped out that base there wasn't much left but he gathered up what was left and... well we weren't entirely sure what he was trying to do at first. Speak to Ward, he can tell you why. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	agent33 2016-05-21 08:25 pm UTC (link)
	...where was I? If he was running HYDRA. Where was I? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neveragoodfit 2016-05-21 08:51 pm UTC (link)
	He should tell you, he knows everything. I only know what I heard. I'm sorry, Kara. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	agent33 2016-05-21 08:53 pm UTC (link)
	He told me. He went back because I...I died. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neveragoodfit 2016-05-21 08:56 pm UTC (link)
	He did. That was the final straw, he had nothing left and ~~it's my fault~~ no reason not to go back and take over. I really am sorry, for all of it. I wish things had gone differently for all of us. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	agent33 2016-05-21 09:03 pm UTC (link)
	You all had so many chances to make it right. I hated you. All of you. I hated you all so much. And no, he was hardly innocent, he'd hurt you all, but...god... I'm going to this barbecue thing. And I'm going to be polite. For his sake. But I don't trust a damn one of you (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

neveragoodfit
2016-05-21 09:10 pm UTC (link)

I know, being here has shown me that and I hate that I never gave him that chance.

You have every right to hate us. I don't blame you for that. We hurt each other, he and I worse than anyone else. There's not a day goes by I don't wish it had all gone differently.

I don't expect you to trust us. But here we have a chance to start over or at least try again. If you want to that is.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	agent33 2016-05-21 09:20 pm UTC (link)
	I won't forget. Not any of it. But second chances I can do. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	neveragoodfit 2016-05-21 09:25 pm UTC (link)
	None of us should forget. This place is good for that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Daisy \| Kara agent33 2016-05-21 09:33 pm UTC (link)
	Did you love him? Before, I mean? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara

neveragoodfit
2016-05-21 09:39 pm UTC (link)

Yes. I did. More than I think I ever loved anyone before. It's why his betrayal stung so much, why I couldn't forgive him because he broke my heart and my trust.

I hate myself for what I did to him, looking back I know I shouldn't have done any of it but I was hurting and I wanted him to hurt as much as I was. I destroyed him more than anyone else. I probably did just as much damage to him as Garrett ever did. Maybe more.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Daisy \| Kara agent33 2016-05-21 09:42 pm UTC (link)
	He's easy to love. He doesn't believe it. He hates himself so much of the time. And maybe here, maybe she... Maybe she did what neither of us could. And you didn't damage him as much as Garrett did. Or his family. But you did hurt him. You did break him. I just wanted to make that better. I think maybe I was, for a little while. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara

neveragoodfit
2016-05-21 09:49 pm UTC (link)

He is. He made me feel safe when I was first on the team.

I know but here I think he realizes he has people who genuinely care about him.

Here he got the chance he never did back home, the chance to come clean without Garrett around to put the fear of god in him.

I know I did and I'll never forgive myself for it. He was only trying to help me but I was too scared to see it.

I'm glad he had you, he seemed better when he helped us. He even tried to apologize to us but we wouldn't listen. I was even awful to him then.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara

agent33
2016-05-21 09:58 pm UTC (link)

How it came about was wrong. Coulson held me hostage. And Grant could have walked away, but he cared. He loved me and he came back. But I think when he got there, when he saw you all again, He remembered how much he missed it. He really did care about you all.

He blames himself for my death.

Another to add to the list I think, its how he sees it.

I need you to be honest. I need you to tell me exactly how it played out that day. Everything you remember.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara

neveragoodfit
2016-05-21 10:02 pm UTC (link)

You're right, what Coulson did was wrong. He never should have held you hostage. But he probably wasn't thinking straight, they had no idea where I was and I think it scared them all. Seeing him again on the bus, it was hard. It was almost like we'd never left but there was this giant rift between us and we couldn't repair it.

Of course he does. You know he won't see it any other way.

Do you mean the day we hit that base?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Daisy \| Kara agent33 2016-05-21 10:07 pm UTC (link)
	There are always excuses Daisy. Only difference is Grant doesn't hide behind any. He accepts the things he did. But yes. I mean that day. I mean how I died. I want to know what you remember. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara

neveragoodfit
2016-05-21 10:14 pm UTC (link)

I'm trying to accept the things I've done, all of them.

I wasn't there, when you left with Bobbi. I think it was a few days after the mission. I'd gone back to Afterlife to try and ease over the tension between the inhumans and SHIELD. I didn't find out about your death until a while after. All I do know is that Ward was the one who pulled the trigger. I know Bobbi nearly died, took a bullet meant for Hunter and it left her in a bad way. And Ward did the only thing he felt he could.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara

agent33
2016-05-21 10:29 pm UTC (link)

I'd made myself look like May.

He shot her. Because it's how you beat May, you get the drop on her. He didn't know it was me till I fell. Till the mask dropped.

He may have pulled the trigger but none of it is his fault. I won't be another reason he feels guilty.

...I don't know why I'm confiding in you.

I went too far the other day. A lot of the time, I really, genuinely hate you. Because of what you put him through. And because while he hurt you all too, he needed a chance. Just one.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara

neveragoodfit
2016-05-21 10:36 pm UTC (link)

I never thought he'd have just killed you. I knew he cared about you and I knew he'd never hurt anyone he loved like that. He was a lot of things back home but he was never that, the kind of person who would hurt someone he loved.

You're right, it's not his fault. None of it was his fault, all of it lies at his family's and Garrett's feet.

I don't know either. Maybe it's because we both loved him and lost him.

Its okay, I get it. I understand why you feel that way. I should have given him a chance, I wish I had and part of me always thought I'd be able to down the line I missed my chance though, I lost him the moment I pulled that trigger, there was no coming back from that and I know that now.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Daisy | Kara -

agent33, 2016-05-21 10:43 pm UTC

Daisy | Kara -

neveragoodfit, 2016-05-21 10:54 pm UTC

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