InsaneJournal

Peter Vincent thinks people see what they want to (smokingmagician) wrote in wariscomingcom,
@ 2014-01-28 01:17:00

Entry tags:

castiel, malcolm reynolds, peter vincent, robin hood, spike, vex

Filtered to Drinking Buddies
Anyone else feel like getting smashed?

[Mum]
It's almost February
Do you
I miss

[Voicemail left on Spike's Phone]
[Peter's voice is low, the words come out slow. There's an edge of strain and anxiety audible in his voice.]

Hey, Spike, it's Peter. I've, um... I've been thinking for a while I needed to call you. Just... been trying to work up to it. Um... [there's a pause for a few breaths] What you did for me, last summer... I wanted to thank you. In all honesty, um... I'm... fairly certain I wouldn't be standing here today, if you hadn't. You looked after me, when I was falling apart, and... kept me from doing some really stupid shit, until I could pick myself back up again. And I think you saved my life, with that. So. Thanks. [There's another pause, and then the message ends.]

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	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 11:50 am UTC (link)
	That's part of the problem, love. There's no fixing most of it, and she's given up enough for me already. I don't want her to hurt. I don't doubt that she loves me. But I'm not the son she remembers. And there's nothing I or anyone else can do about it. I don't know how to make it better. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 11:53 am UTC (link)
	But that's a part of love. Be the son she has now, love. Be hers. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 11:59 am UTC (link)
	Well it's a part I hate. I don't know if I'm enough. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 12:03 pm UTC (link)
	It's a part everyone hates but it makes it stronger too. You're enough to be her son. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 12:08 pm UTC (link)
	It shouldn't hurt. Love shouldn't hurt. But I don't know if I'm enough for her. She misses my Dad so fucking much and I just... She needs more than I can give her. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 12:09 pm UTC (link)
	Not all the time. But sometimes. Their pain is your pain. It's not your job to be that for her. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 12:35 pm UTC (link)
	I hate it. I'm the only family she's got left. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 12:36 pm UTC (link)
	I know. That's a lot. You're a lot. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 12:55 pm UTC (link)
	~~I hate him. I hate him so much it should scare me and I don't give a fuck~~ I don't know what to do, Cas. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 12:57 pm UTC (link)
	Spend time with her. Give her the contact she missed out on. Share yourself with her. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 01:05 pm UTC (link)
	~~But I've been doing th~~ I know. I'm sorry, just... it's getting close to that time. It's on my mind, it's on hers. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 01:08 pm UTC (link)
	It will take time. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 01:18 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah. You busy, mate? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 01:21 pm UTC (link)
	No. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 01:23 pm UTC (link)
	I could use a hug? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 01:24 pm UTC (link)
	I could give you one. I will come now. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 01:28 pm UTC (link)
	Mmm, brilliant. On-call hug delivery. Knew I could count on you, love. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 01:30 pm UTC (link)
	~~It's good to do something right.~~ I will always have a hug for you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 01:37 pm UTC (link)
	Would I be pushing my luck to ask for a kiss too? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 01:38 pm UTC (link)
	Yes. But you are lucky tonight. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 01:48 pm UTC (link)
	Very, very lucky. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 01:49 pm UTC (link)
	Come to bed? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Cas smokingmagician 2014-01-31 01:53 pm UTC (link)
	Don't have to ask me twice, love. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Peter ofthursdays 2014-01-31 01:54 pm UTC (link)
	(Reply to this) (Parent)

(Read comments) -