Darlington (gentlemandemon) wrote in valloic, @ 2023-10-27 12:37:00 |
|
|||
Vallo Musical: FINALE!
WHO: Everybody who came out to smash things at the warehouse today, with featured players Darlington, Nancy, Astarion, Tav, Prompto, Nebula, Rocket, Adora, and Kellach
WHAT: Everybody came here to smash things, and then they get roped into one final number.
WHERE: The Warehouse of Horrors
SONG CHOICE: A situationally relevant take on One Day More from Les Miserables
(Sick of listening to the damn thing, DARLINGTON picks up the skull and throws it hard across the room, straight into a wall. It’s very effective: the skull is smashed to pieces like so many decorations before it. This time, though, something happens not just to the smasher, but to everyone who’s come to the warehouse to get this problem solved. The lights lower except the ones that are somehow focused exactly where Darlington is standing. Music begins to rise: the delicate strings of the opening to “One Day More” from Les Miserables, and DARLINGTON steps forward with his head held high.)
[DARLINGTON]
One song more!
A final number to conclude the show
That’s how things in Vallo always go
We hoped that we were done with it
But now we’re doing one more bit
(ASTARION and TAV walk into the expanding light, apparently serving as this number’s Marius and Cosette.)
ASTARION
Why did I have to smash those things?
Now my arms are too long for me
[DARLINGTON]
One song more!
[TAV]
Now there’s a swelling of some strings,
My face has worts, and it’s upsetting.
(Enter PROMPTO, looking terribly forlorn while the lovers ignore him)
[PROMPTO]
One more song in minor key
[ASTARION]
(re: Tav’s worts) Gods, those really are the worst.
[PROMPTO]
One more song, my pockets are full…
[TAV]
(to Astarion) Long-Arms, you should talk less crap.
[PROMPTO]
…with eye of newt and tail of rat
[ASTARION & TAV]
Let us hope this ends swiftly.
[PROMPTO]
Guess I’ll purchase new blue jeans
(As PROMPTO holds his dramatic note, KELLACH and NANCY step into the scene, lit individually. While Kellach begins singing, Nancy touches a chair and it immediately collapses into a pile of candy corn)
[KELLACH & NANCY]
One more song before it’s done
Everything is candy corn!
Guess we’re stuck with a finale
Since I smashed that stupid box!
Came here looking for a fight
I don’t even like this stuff!
Now we’re singing this off-key!
[ALL]
We’re singing this
Like it or not
(The whole room begins to rotate slowly as the intensity of the song picks up and ADORA enters a spotlight.)
[DARLINGTON]
One song more!
[ADORA]
One last song, ‘cause this is Vallo
At least we don’t have to dance much
We’ll keep singing ‘til it’s finished
Then go home and — (Nancy walks by her) OOOOOOOO!
[DARLINGTON]
One song more!
(ROCKET and NEBULA enter together, appearing to be mid-argument)
[ROCKET]
Got some fuckin’ wings,
They don’t work at all
[NEBULA]
Call me to complain
When you are twelve feet tall!
[ROCKET & NEBULA]
Why do we still sing?
Isn’t this enough?
Everybody’s had their solo
This is way too much!
[ALL]
One song to a new beginning
Raise the key to a new height!
All of us will sing real loud,
All of us will sing real loud!
We’re concluding this adventure
There’s adventure to conclude
Do you hear the people sing?
[ASTARION]
I can’t not hear.
Oh gods, shut uuuuuup.
[DARLINGTON]
One song more!
[ADORA & TAV]
We came here to be big heroes (The strings are coming in again!)
[ADORA & ROCKET & TAV]
We now have some big regrets (Wings don’t fuckin’ work!) (And these worts won’t go away!)
[ADORA]
We came here to be big heroes
We now have some big regrets
We smashed first, asked questions later
It’s time to move around the set!
(As Darlington belts out his next line, the cast moves into finale position, everybody posed nicely for the stunning conclusion)
[DARLINGTON]
One song more!
[ROCKET & NEBULA & PROMPTO]
Why do we still sing? (There’s still crap in my pockets)
Isn’t this enough?
Everybody’s had their solo
This is way too much!
[ADORA]
Why is Vallo always like this?
[DARLINGTON]
Tomorrow this will all be done
But we all know more tricks will come
[ALL]
Tomorrow we’ll discover what old Vallo has in store!
One last tune
One last dance
One song more!
(The lights go out! The final notes fade, and this time, so do the mysterious auras surrounding the singers. The compulsion to perform is gone, and at last our heroes are free. The lights return to normal: a new day has dawned!)