Reality Crash Communications

Right then. Hello. Seem to have a bit of a problem. You see, I'm supposed to be in Norway, just outside of Bergen, actually, only it seems I've been redirected, and am instead just outside of a Halloween shop in a place that definitely is not Norway, and especially not Bergen. I ought to be able to tell, because Bergen's all hilly, and Norway is rather cold this time of year. Well, I say rather, but what I mean is extremely. Well, I say extreme, but honestly, Bergen's a bit mild compared to oh, say Lapland, which, frankly, you might not be politically correct in including as part of Norway. I'm not too clear on that point. Haven't asked a Laplander his or her preference lately, though I really should. Interesting place, Lapland. They drive reindeer. I love reindeer. Reminds me of Christmas. Well, Christmas in the stories. My Christmases never include reindeer. They usually include ... Well. It's not important.

Anyway, could someone kindly tell me where I am?