InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "WEEEE YEEEEEEEE TOOOOO POOOOOO"

Cordelia Chase takes crap from no one. (thisismyofframp) wrote in colligo_network,
@ 2011-09-15 08:15:00

Entry tags:

caroline salvatore, cordelia chase, faith lehane, lexi branson, lyle bennet, spike

So let me make sure I've got this straight. I'm stuck in some city that's not on Earth that I can't leave, the welcoming committee consists of two overgrown pieces of walking metal that do not understand personal space whatsoever who hand out a crappy PDA with a map of the city that looks like it was drawn by a five year old suffering from the DTs, and the people I've met so far on the streets are torn between helping me out and turning into mindless zombies who act about half a step away from muttering 'Braaaaaains' before rambling away in search of the next person to freak the hell out?

You know, when I was told I had a different path to follow and it was time to move on? This is not what I had in mind.

(Post a new comment)

	1ofthegoodguys 2011-09-15 01:36 pm UTC (link)
	So Red gets sent back and they replace her with you? That's one hell of a bloody downgrade. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-15 06:59 pm UTC (link)
	Oh look, if it isn't the resident Angel wannabe. I'd ask what in the hell you're doing here but that would imply you actually have a frigging clue of what's going on for once and we both know the odds of that are pretty much slim to none. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	1ofthegoodguys 2011-09-15 07:15 pm UTC (link)
	Oh ye of little faith. Long story short, we've been kidnapped by a bloke called The Collector to an alien planet, hence the two moons. And I am not a sodding Angle wannabe. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

thisismyofframp
2011-09-15 07:21 pm UTC (link)

Hey! My faith is just fine. I just know better than to put my faith in a guy whose sense of fashion is the reason we had to suffer through the likes of Billy Idol.

And okay. You're not an Angel wannabe. Clearly you were trying to be like some other vampiric Champion of the PTB last we met. Except oh! Wait! There isn't another vampiric Champion of the PTB besides Angel!

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	1ofthegoodguys 2011-09-15 07:45 pm UTC (link)
	Billy Idol would have been around no matter what bloody color my hair is. And I am nothing like Angel. I sought out my soul. He was cursed. Very different set of circumstances. When are you from, by the way? And I hope you don't have any deep, dark secrets you don't want shared with the class because people have been going around confessing things at random. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

thisismyofframp
2011-09-16 08:12 pm UTC (link)

Yeah but that whole glow-in-the-dark 'do of his was what gave him his staying power.

Also? Spare me the details of your soul because I so don't care. It doesn't matter how you got your soul. It's what you do with it once you have it that matters. And Angel was doing the whole saving people thing long before you.

I'm from after I died. Hence the whole 'told this was a different path and time to move on' bit. Unless I somehow came back from that. Which I'm doubting what with me only being an astral projection that last go 'round anyway.

And since when do I have secrets? Hello! I'm me. If I think it, I say it, and any secrets I might have had kinda became pretty obsolete when I bit the big one.

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	1ofthegoodguys 2011-09-17 05:35 am UTC (link)
	Why are we still talking about sodding Billy Idol? He may have been doing it longer, but his soul switch can be turned off far easier then mine. Also? I liked you better the last time you were here. Just thought I'd warn you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

thisismyofframp
2011-09-17 06:50 pm UTC (link)

Because he's fun to pick on? I mean, he's not exactly on the same level as Xander for taunting amusement but he's pretty close.

And ok. I'll admit that you not having the whole one moment of happiness and you're suddenly a remorseless psycho with a fetish for leather pants thing is definitely a mark in your column. But, Angel is still my Champion.

The last time I was what now? You want to run that one by me again?

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	1ofthegoodguys 2011-09-18 02:26 am UTC (link)
	When I arrived here you were already here, but you were sent back not too long after that. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	bubbly_vamp 2011-09-15 01:41 pm UTC (link)
	They are pretty handsy, aren't they? They definitely need a course in human relations. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-15 07:14 pm UTC (link)
	No. My date for Homecoming in high school was handsy. These guys were somewhere in the groping-without-dinner-first category. And seriously. Who puts automated suits of armor as guards in a library, anyway? Talk about things that do not belong anywhere even remotely in the same vicinity. Sheesh. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	bubbly_vamp 2011-09-15 07:52 pm UTC (link)
	I know, as far as welcome wagons go, they suck. What they should do is make copies of Caroline's Newbie Welcome Letter and just hand that out to new arrivals. There'd be so much less confusion from the get go. I'm Lexi, by the way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-16 08:14 pm UTC (link)
	And possibly a few people with massive brain hemorrhaging from the sheer amount of info. Not that it isn't helpful. It definitely is. Kinda makes me wish we had something like that back home when new people moved to Sunnydale. It sure would have kept the death toll a little lower, at least. Cordelia. It's nice to meet you, Lexi. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

bubbly_vamp
2011-09-17 05:23 am UTC (link)

What's a little brain hemorrhaging when the alternative is being greeted with a blank stare by the locals? So would the first thing on that list have been, 'If you move here chances are good that you'll bite it or get bitten.'?

Since Caroline already spilled the beans, I guess I should also tell you that I'm a vampire. We're not too secretive around here so you would have found out eventually.

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thisismyofframp
2011-09-17 06:53 pm UTC (link)

True. I'll take nosebleeds and potential death over creepy automatons anyday, thanks. And yeah. Just add 'and possibly have front row seats for the end of the world what with you now officially sitting smack on top of a mouth directly to Hell' to the list and you pretty much summed it up.

And that? Is going to take some getting used to. I mean, I'm assuming you aren't all evil incarnate since Faith isn't making with the slaying, but to date I've known exactly two vampires who were even worth knowing. And while Spike is on that list, the jury is still a little out on him, as far as I'm concerned.

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	bubbly_vamp 2011-09-18 02:41 am UTC (link)
	I don't make it a habit of feeding off humans anymore if I can help it so you won't have to worry about me going all veiny eyed and neck bitey. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	blaidd_drwg_ 2011-09-15 06:31 pm UTC (link)
	Gotta say that's a pretty damn accurate description. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-15 07:15 pm UTC (link)
	What can I say? Stating the oh-so-painfully-obvious is a knack of mine. It ranks right up there with looking fabulous in stilettos and the ability to max out a credit card in less time than it takes most people to even get inside the store. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	blaidd_drwg_ 2011-09-15 07:35 pm UTC (link)
	Some pretty good skills to have. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-16 08:14 pm UTC (link)
	I like to think so. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	blaidd_drwg_ 2011-09-16 11:07 pm UTC (link)
	Rose Tyler. Nice to meet you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-17 06:54 pm UTC (link)
	Cordelia Chase. Likewise. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	wrongchosenone 2011-09-15 06:52 pm UTC (link)
	Got it in one. And then there were three.. or maybe four, but I dunno if B's still around. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-15 07:18 pm UTC (link)
	Faith? What is this, a convention of the former baddies of Sunnydale reunion? Only, clearly that's out if Buffy's around. And you aren't evil still or again or something, right? Because I like my eye not blackened and, y'know, my person still somehow breathing. Which is an odd thing to say considering I'm supposed to be dead last I checked. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wrongchosenone 2011-09-15 09:48 pm UTC (link)
	Well it is now that Red and Tara ain't here. They disappeared not that long ago. And hell if I know where Buffy went. Maybe she disappeared too. Nah, not evil. No one's gonna get killed on my watch anyway. Oh yeah, right. Make sure you're not possessed by some creepy baby thing or whatever, right? I mean you're not knocked up and evil, right? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

thisismyofframp
2011-09-16 08:18 pm UTC (link)

And by disappeared you mean, what? Go poof? Return back to where they came from? Either way, that's pretty screwed up, if you ask me. No one did but, well, that's never stopped me before.

Good. I'm glad you're not evil. Not that evil you wasn't super duper fun what with the attacks and torturings and everything but... actually. Wait. It wasn't super duper fun. It wasn't even a little fun. And nope, I am definitely possession and pregnant-with-a-higher-power free. Though you're totally welcome to see for yourself if you don't believe me. Speaking as someone who technically was evil more recently than you, I don't mind the whole lack of trust thing. Especially since we were never exactly very trustful of one another even when we both were upstanding members of society.

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wrongchosenone
2011-09-16 11:26 pm UTC (link)

We think back to where they came from, but yeah essentially. Poof. Like they were never here. Hell yeah it's screwed up. This place is all sorts of messed up.

Glad you ain't evil either. I'm done with evil shit. Tired even. Though it's just as weird here. When I showed up, Glory was here and people were dyin left and right. It was crazy, and B wasn't here and no one had a weapon. Ten times sort of fucked up. I'll take your word for it.

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	thisismyofframp 2011-09-17 06:55 pm UTC (link)
	Well that just puts the suck in sucktactular. Wait. Hold up. Glory was here? As in Hellgod comma The? That's... what in the hell is wrong with the being in charge of this place? Is he mentally damaged or what? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wrongchosenone 2011-09-17 07:26 pm UTC (link)
	You've no idea. Yeah. Glory. Here. I have no fucking clue. Sometimes people come back when they die here, but it was still totally nuts. He's totally mentally damaged. There's always these experiments and shit. Last time, the locals turned on us all and tried to kill everyone. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	rubber 2011-09-15 07:18 pm UTC (link)
	Ohmigod! That was practically my reaction. ~~But you said it so much better~~ Here. This might help. It's a little TL;DR, but it's really useful, I promise. I'm Caroline. I really love your hair. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-15 07:26 pm UTC (link)
	Then clearly you must be awesome... and also thorough to a degree that even Wes wasn't capable of managing. That's impressive. Really, really impressive. Nice to meet you, Caroline. I'm Cordelia. And thanks. It does look pretty good for a girl that's supposed to be dead, I have to say. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rubber 2011-09-15 07:34 pm UTC (link)
	Only when it comes to social networking, but thanks. It's really nice to meet you, Cordelia. And yeah, we get a lot of dead people here. I'm sort of dead, but that kind of makes it sound bad. I'm a vampire. It's kind of a thing. But if you know Spike, I guess you know about vampires. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-16 08:20 pm UTC (link)
	So, undead then. Good to know. Also? Not really sure what to make of the whole announcing something like that to a stranger, thing. Where I come from, it's not exactly something most people advertise. Except for Spike. But he's a little special needs so it's really to be expected. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

rubber
2011-09-16 08:45 pm UTC (link)

I prefer 'enjoying an alternative existence'. Okay, not really. That actually looks kind of stupid typed out. But undead just has such zombie undertones. Anyway, people here are pretty open about stuff like that. As long as we don't go massacring people, nobody really bugs us about it.

I have to ask, did the peroxide seep into his brain and cause damage? Is that what it is?

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thisismyofframp
2011-09-17 07:00 pm UTC (link)

Well, like I told Lexi. It's going to take a little getting used to, on my end, but if others are fine with it I don't see why it should be a problem on my end. Though I definitely agree that a big old fat massacre will probably make me change my mind, like, a lot. Even if it would make me feel more at home... as depressing as that is to admit.

And I really wish I knew what his damage was. I mean, don't get me wrong. Spike has his moments and he has helped save the world a few times, so he's earned a stake-free existence at least. But he definitely does things sometime that make me embarrassed to think I ever considered him a significant threat. Minus the whole, y'know, he can kill me without even breaking a sweat or getting off the couch, really, thing.

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	notlarry 2011-09-15 07:23 pm UTC (link)
	Yup. That about sums it up. And I can't say anyone likely had this in mind when they ended up here, but c'est la vie, here we are, and here's we gotta be. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	thisismyofframp 2011-09-15 07:29 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah. Funny thing about that. It's a little hard to be all 'such is life' about something when you're supposed to be, you know, dead. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notlarry 2011-09-15 07:36 pm UTC (link)
	Ah, yeah. There's a handful of people in that situation here. Everyone reacts differently, but just settle in for the long haul because this place gets a bit weird from time to time. Granted, considering you're used to one of the vampires above, I'm guessing weird is normal for you. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

thisismyofframp
2011-09-16 02:34 pm UTC (link)

Wow. Tell someone else's secrets much? Or are the vampires up there totally cool with you outing them to random strangers?

And yes. I'm definitely used to weird. You grow up on a Hellmouth, you learn to deal with it. As for the long haul, you can drop the whole blasé thing anytime now. Because seriously. Acting that way to someone who just came back from the dead that you don't even know and who might not take things in stride as easily as yours truly? Not even close to acceptable.

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notlarry
2011-09-16 03:28 pm UTC (link)

Cool enough that they're not going to do anything drastic like eat me. ~~I hope.~~ ~~Not that I would really mind if Carol~~

Sorry. Apparently I do things like this, and it makes people want to punch me into next week. I should probably monitor my tone a little more, but it gets a bit hard to be conscientiousness of how other people might view a situation when to you, it's little more than another alien invasion before teatime. ~~And now I'm making myself sound like the Doctor. Bad Lyle.~~

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	thisismyofframp 2011-09-16 08:23 pm UTC (link)
	Huh. It's been my experience that most vampires aren't exactly going to warn you before that whole pesky hunt you down and eat you thing they do. Especially when they lose their tempers and just start making with the smackdown. ... and alien invasion before teatime? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

notlarry
2011-09-16 08:55 pm UTC (link)

The ones here are reasonable enough even rather nice, and I think even some of the rudest ones would have least give me a fifteen second headstart. Not that it would make much of a difference since I'm pretty damn slow anyways. Oh, and that whole vamp superspeed thing. That would probably have an impact, too.

And. Yeah. It's not like they happen every day, but it's stuff like that, you know. Aliens, vampires, werewolves, randoms bouts of truthfulness, everyone suddenly switching genders. Half of it godawful and the rest jarring but altogether harmless.

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	thisismyofframp 2011-09-17 07:02 pm UTC (link)
	You haven't come up against any vampires that pose a real threat to you before, have you? No, no, the crazy I'm used to. It was the teatime thing that threw me. Because, well, hello. American. Not exactly known for sitting down at a designated time and drinking tea, here. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	notlarry 2011-09-17 08:02 pm UTC (link)
	Not really. I come from a superhero reality, not a supernatural one. Ah. Yeah. That. It just seemed like the most proper timetable to go along with alien invasions? (Reply to this) (Parent)