InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Stay groovy, mkay?"

Hawke was born the (victimofaname) wrote in chances_net,
@ 2024-07-08 16:15:00

Entry tags:

dc: dick grayson (comics), ~ex: dragon age anders, ~ex: dragon age fenris, ~ex: dragon age hawke, ~ex: marvel carol danvers (mcu)

At this point, you know what why not? This is fine. Everything is fine. At least nothing's bloody green. Or filled with spiders.

...if there's spiders please. No. Let me dream.

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

	mages 2024-07-08 09:34 pm UTC (link)
	Does any of it ever, really? Just when you think it does, it stops making sense again. I'm partial to emerald and smaller than my palm, so I would consider that a nightmare. Wet? I will regret asking, but what in Andraste's name are you talking about? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	victimofaname 2024-07-08 09:40 pm UTC (link)
	On the average, I didn't get my head hit, are you okay? Funny you should put it like that because yeah it was a nightmare. Or a realm of one. Or a portion of it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	mages 2024-07-08 11:10 pm UTC (link)
	Are you? Do you need a healer? I believe that answers it. Your sister is here, perhaps I can take you to her, or inform her, whichever you'd prefer. I'd understand, either way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

victimofaname
2024-07-08 11:26 pm UTC (link)

No?

Beth's here though so you know, priorities yeah take me to see her if you know where she is.

[Anders]
I was in the Fade, which I'm sure you picked out, but it wasn't like before. I was there physically.

No, I don't know how. No, I didn't bring a Blight home. Warden's on site checked me out, but I'll allow a check up.

Oh and your name's off the Warden's records, at least in Weisshaupt. So is Beth. Not that they'll go looking any time soon, as they're a mess, but still. Beth doesn't need to know this.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

mages
2024-07-08 11:36 pm UTC (link)

Are you certain?

Our lodgings are on the same floor, so I do, in fact, know where she is. Real beds, can you believe it?

[hawke.]

I'm familiar with the smell, yes. Physically? Trouble always had a way of following you, but to the Fade, Hawke?

Small miracles. I can, if you'd like.

I'll leave that to you to tell her then, whenever you decide to. And thank you.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

victimofaname
2024-07-08 11:50 pm UTC (link)

At least mostly.

I'm thankful for some small miracles.

[Anders]

Listen, it was legitimately not my fault this time. That one was all the Inquisitor. I remember falling and then being upside down. I do have questions though. Like, what kind of spirit could pretend to be a human soul?

I'll trust you over the Warden mages any day. I have complaints about them.

I took enough from her, she can live her life in peace. And we're even for what you did for Beth.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

mages
2024-07-09 12:06 am UTC (link)

That isn't worrying in the slightest.

Of late, so am I.

[hawke.]

Fingers are most decidedly not pointing anywhere, I promise. ~~I'm the last~~ That depends. Did it say anything to you? What did it want?

~~Do you? You shouldn't~~ I In that case, I'll brush up on my bedside manner. You can say them out loud. Chances are, I agree with you. The fact they're complaints makes that a safe bet from where I'm standing.

You didn't take anything, Hawke, and I doubt she'd think that way. I don't know that there is breaking even for me, but I appreciate the thought.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Anders

victimofaname
2024-07-09 12:23 am UTC (link)

I'll explain more in person, but technically yes? To make sense of it, we got dropped in the domain of a fear demon. It called itself Nightmare, and it was that demon that was creating the false Calling. If you're at all concerned how powerful that makes it, congrats. In that domain was another spirit, claiming to be Justinia, you know the former Divine. It helped us. Guided us. It didn't want anything. I'm hedging by bets it was a spirit of hope, because it makes the most sense. But it did look human. I haven't met many who can do that.

Oh trust me, there's more. But I'm telling you straight up, my favorite spirit is not going to like what they did. It's that bad. I'm happy to share but if I have to, politely and firmly, tell him to shut up or put up I will.

Beth always thinks better of me than I am. And I never said you're breaking even. Just this one's solved.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

hawke.

mages
2024-07-09 01:50 am UTC (link)

Concerned is getting closer to what I'm feeling at the moment. I heard that Calling in Orlais until we made it into Nevarra. It was a demon? ~~What of~~ ~~Did~~ And the rest of the Wardens? What happened to them?

Hope is often the antithesis to fear. If it attempted to guide you out of the Fade, I can't think of another who would have been more capable. Why the Divine?

I've met a few who can. If they believe it can help those they meet. Most prefer not to take any shape though. You are right about that.

If that's the case I [.....] need time. My control is not as good as it has been. It [....] Telling it to shut up takes a lot more effort these days.

Better that than the opposite. I'll take it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Anders

victimofaname
2024-07-09 02:10 am UTC (link)

Nothing good, at the least of it. A lot of them didn't make it out of it, asin next Blight is going to be fun not made it out of it. I'm sparing details, for good reasons. There was one who figured that 'hey this seems wildly suspicious' and we worked together But yeah. A demon.

A familiar face for the Inquisitor? To have us trust it? I don't know. It sacrificed itself against Nightmare before we had any chance to ask it more questions.

Alright well as much fun as he is, what do you need from me? I have your back, you know.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

hawke.

mages
2024-07-09 04:34 pm UTC (link)

Part of me wants to believe it's what they deserve, but I can't tell if that's how I really feel or how I'm telling myself I should ~~or if it's~~. No one deserves to suffer, so I hope it was quick, whatever happened to them.

If it had motives like that, I wonder if it was a spirit at all. I've never met a spirit capable of lying or being deceitful, even to their own detriment.

I don't know, Hawke. I don't know that I could ask any more of you than I already have.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Anders

victimofaname
2024-07-09 04:44 pm UTC (link)

It got solved, either way. And I dealt with the worst of Weisshaupt. I just lost my faith in another organization, so you know on the list they go.

Fun. That's given me a lot of other questions so I'm just going to put that in a box.

Don't be a shit. You're family. We stick together. I'm more angry you didn't talk to me, you know, so you can ask me for anything. If I can do it, I will.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

hawke.

mages
2024-07-09 05:43 pm UTC (link)

How long is that list now? I have to ask, have you ever considered going on the run? It's not all that bad once you get used to the never-ending barrage of people hunting you, the sleeping in the woods, and the incredibly stale bread. That was a joke. In case that wasn't clear. And I don't really recommend it. Besides you're a much better person than I am.

Probably for the best.

And I thought that was just part of my charm. There just... wasn't an easy way to talk about it, Hawke. I'm sorry. I'm trying to do better. I promise.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Anders victimofaname 2024-07-09 05:53 pm UTC (link)
	Being on the run is overrated. I've gotten used to comforts like beds. Jury's out on the last though. I know. I had the same argument with 'Bela, of all people, but there isn't anything you can't tell me. Whatever sort of problem, we'll sort it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	hawke. mages 2024-07-09 11:17 pm UTC (link)
	Perhaps one day I'll get tired of it. Is it? There wouldn't be much deliberation I'd imagine. And you got through to her? The amount of times I'd argued with her and felt like I'd been just talking to myself is astounding. [.....] I know. It's just difficult to find the right words. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Anders

victimofaname
2024-07-09 11:24 pm UTC (link)

Maybe one day you won't have to keep running, and I can shove you all in a house and stop getting gray hairs.

Well this was after the whole Qunari mess, so if 'getting through to her' also means 'she fucked off for a while because I called her out on her nonsense' sure I got through to her. Regardless, my point of tell me things, so I can solve problems remains a recurring theme. Even if you can't find the right words.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	hawke. mages 2024-07-09 11:48 pm UTC (link)
	Maybe one day. In the meantime, I'll apologise for all the greys. If she remembered any of your conversation, I'd say that you did. I can't confidently say she ever took any of my advice to heart. It was unsolicited, but nevertheless. Truthfully, it's the same problem I've had since we met, Hawke. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Anders

victimofaname
2024-07-10 12:02 am UTC (link)

Eh I'll look like a fox in 'em. And you're only like fifty percent of 'em.

We all love 'Bela but Maker does she make choices.

Alright, so what's our next step then? There's no Kirkwall to manage, no weird fake Calling to worry about. We can literally all get together and throw shit at the wall until something sticks. And I know you've probably considered the options, so lay them on me. And we're not going to know they'll work until we try 'em.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

hawke.

mages
2024-07-10 01:01 pm UTC (link)

Not all of us can be so lucky. Only half? I'll take it. I would have thought it was more than that.

Be careful. That's how you get venereal diseases.

I've been doing research since we left Kirkwall, following every lead I could. It's all theory and most of them nearly impossible. And the anger. Sometimes it's all I feel, burning in the centre of my chest and I can't think of anything else. We can't keep living this way. We just can't.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Anders

victimofaname
2024-07-10 02:04 pm UTC (link)

There would be more, but you know, there's the rest of the family. Merrill's at least a third of it, and the reason it's not a larger number is that I share custody with Varric.

I'll pass.

Who says it's impossible, though? I'd like to remind you I fell into the literal, physical, Fade (an impossibility) and Corypheus was said to be one of the Blight giving Magisters from ye old times (also an impossibility). Have you tried them? Because we won't know they're impossible until we do.

Look, I can't help with the anger. I live with it too. My way of dealing with it is hitting the cause of the problem until it stops being a problem, so in that regard, I'm not helpful.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	hawke. mages 2024-07-11 01:04 am UTC (link)
	~~Merrill~~ I would have assumed she and I were about equal. Most should. I haven't. I'm [......] honestly afraid. No one has even attempted and of this, and I don't have the power to try on my own. ~~I've been~~ Not without putting those I care about in danger. If the problem wasn't me, I would try your way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Anders victimofaname 2024-07-11 01:38 am UTC (link)
	If I didn't have shared custody, sure. Well I get the worry but we can't keep being afraid. Walk me through the concerns. Because we have Beth with us. Which solves some of the power issue. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	hawke. mages 2024-07-11 04:10 pm UTC (link)
	Have you ever considered shared custody of me then? It might save you a grey hair and a wrinkle or two down the line. I know. It does, but I can't ask her to risk herself for me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Anders victimofaname 2024-07-11 04:20 pm UTC (link)
	You act like I'm not sharing custody. I mean, you can. As much as I worry about the little bird, she's come into her own. Don't tell her I said it, though, but she knows her limits. What about looking for a way to potentially limit any damage? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	hawke. mages 2024-07-11 05:01 pm UTC (link)
	Should I ask what other unfortunate soul has that unwanted task? I'll keep that secret for you, Hawke. And I don't doubt her skills. I just can't have her blood on my hands too. That is something I've been working on. It's why I don't have the power for any of these rituals myself. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)