InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Coffee: drink of the gods."

Tony Stark is characteristically hyperverbal. (the_iron_man) wrote in avengers_net,
@ 2020-05-02 03:16:00

Entry tags:

- network, bruce banner, bucky barnes, christine palmer, drax, hope van dyne, natasha romanoff, nebula, pepper potts, peter quill, steve rogers, t'challa, tony stark

network post: viewable to all

If anyone's tracking their order for an epic shit storm? It's arrived.

Pretty sure this is the opposite of chill, Thor.

Quick question: Does this stop if we throw some virgins or goats on a bonfire?

(Post a new comment)

	blackwidowbite 2020-05-02 12:52 pm UTC (link)
	What in the world is going on? Is Loki involved? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2020-05-02 08:33 pm UTC (link)
	Yes, and no. Loki got caught. Thor tried to handle it, and sorry big guy, you tried but now THIS, so it's no longer just an "Asgard issue" or whatever it was. May want to invest in a scuba suit. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	blackwidowbite 2020-05-03 01:56 pm UTC (link)
	Augh. This is not what we needed right now. Got one somewhere from SHIELD. Also thought it came standard as part of the Avengers arsenal. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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	wintry 2020-05-02 04:00 pm UTC (link)
	Doubt there are many virgins in the vicinity anyway. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2020-05-02 08:33 pm UTC (link)
	Point. Ok, so where do we get some goats? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wintry 2020-05-02 08:36 pm UTC (link)
	Had some I tended to back in Wakanda but I got sort of attached to them so roasting would be sad. Any other options? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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	thehoffs_twin 2020-05-02 09:48 pm UTC (link)
	HIGH FIVES BUDDY So true it hurts. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	kingly 2020-05-02 04:01 pm UTC (link)
	I second Natasha's question. Is this something that requires our...interference? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2020-05-02 08:36 pm UTC (link)
	Uh, I think it's a matter of damage control right now, and suiting up to help wherever we can? Until we can find out where Loki is being housed before they put him in the Raft, or wherever they've cooked up now, we can't really bust him out. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kingly 2020-05-02 08:37 pm UTC (link)
	I am still unclear as to how and why Loki was caught, as you say, but. I will suit up for damage control regardless. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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kingly, 2020-05-02 09:52 pm UTC

Private -

got_you, 2020-05-02 11:36 pm UTC

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punches, 2020-05-02 09:37 pm UTC

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	ohgodno 2020-05-02 05:17 pm UTC (link)
	JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. I am so swamped with hypothermia, near DROWNING, bruises, cuts, scrapes, broken bones .... I have no time to be on the network but holy shit, when this dies down, I'm going to be ALL OVER THIS THING (Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2020-05-02 08:36 pm UTC (link)
	That about covers it. Don't be all over me. I'm not it. Go save all the lives first! (Reply to this) (Parent)

	wontlikemeangry 2020-05-02 07:23 pm UTC (link)
	What is happening? What can I do? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2020-05-02 08:37 pm UTC (link)
	Probably gonna need some medical help in hardest hit areas, if you want to wade out there? Wear your galoshes. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wontlikemeangry 2020-05-02 08:38 pm UTC (link)
	I can do that. Where should I go? Do we have a coordinated plan yet? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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wontlikemeangry, 2020-05-02 09:16 pm UTC

Tony/Bruce -

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	Private got_you 2020-05-02 09:51 pm UTC (link)
	How grounded is the kid? Do I need to talk to May, have Peter hole up at the penthouse for the foreseeable future? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Private the_iron_man 2020-05-02 09:55 pm UTC (link)
	I'm putting the training wheels protocol back on that suit, and any tampering will result in a system shutdown. He'd be working in a onesie again, and trust me? It was fug. That might not be a bad idea. I think him laying low and not being in his usual area is smart. What do you think? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Re: Private -

got_you, 2020-05-02 10:15 pm UTC

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Re: Private -

got_you, 2020-05-06 06:52 pm UTC

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	blueanemone 2020-05-02 11:05 pm UTC (link)
	How would burning virgins or goats help this situation? (Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2020-05-02 11:07 pm UTC (link)
	Just throwing some old school things out there that might appeal to a Norse Thunder God. You busy right now, Blue? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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	the_destroyer 2020-05-02 11:08 pm UTC (link)
	Is a virgin like a vagina? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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	thehoffs_twin 2020-05-02 11:48 pm UTC (link)
	I think the better question is how could it not help? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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blueanemone, 2020-05-04 05:31 pm UTC

	Private thespiderling 2020-05-03 05:00 am UTC (link)
	So I know I'm pretty much...double grounded and I know that's for a good reason, but this storm's crazy - can I go out and help? None of this would be happening if it wasn't for me. (Reply to this) (Thread)

Private

the_iron_man
2020-05-03 08:55 am UTC (link)

Oh hard NOPE. Pep's asking your Aunt May if you can stay at the Penthouse for a bit. I'm not grounding you like a parent since I'm not that, but you won't be doing anything super-hero-ish right now. You were seen trying to help Loki. Way too risky wearing the Spider-suit.

Look, I'm not perfect either. I mess up big time. But I still feel like you're my responsibility and I'm the one that sent you out on a surveillance mission. So this whole thing? It's not just on you. It's on me too.

We'll get all this sorted out. Sit tight. Text your girlfriend. Eat a sandwich and have Karen transfer your intel to Friday.

We'll talk later.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	cptsgrogers 2020-05-07 02:41 pm UTC (link)
	In before some virgin joke about Steve Rogers. More to the point, this clearly isn't a typical storm. Open to suggestions not involving sacrificing Bucky's goats. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	the_iron_man 2020-05-07 05:03 pm UTC (link)
	Winner winner, chicken dinner. I was waiting for someone to say that, and that someone is you. Lucky fella. I don't think we can stop the weather until the weather stops itself. And Thor has vacated, which is probably the wise thing to do, considering the tizzy that Ross is in over catching Loki. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)