Get ready, luvvies, your first Desi post will be here tomorrow.

I'll start taking tip offs for the next issue once it's up!

Good afternoon my little luvbirds! I hope you're all doing well in this land of lands away from where we all once came from!

So have all of you seen Nathan or Peter Petrelli's new baby girl Bethany Petrelli? We're all not quite sure which is daddy, and which is uncle but [photos] released last week have mine and Microsoft Paperclip's eyebrows raising just a tad! She looks like the perfect match of brother and brother! Maybe it's the dominant genes getting all mixy, but I think there's more to that story than meets the eye!

And God Save the President! Microsoft Paperclip here tells me that The Cheshire Cat has been offered a job as Presidential Adviser to our new puppetmaster, Barack Obama. The Cat, however, keeps his lips sealed. When asked for comment, all he had to say was some cheesy rhetoric that none of us would understand anyway, so I won't bother quoting!

And while I've got babies and family still in my wig, cheers to the lovely tri-couple of Sylar, Ethan Petrelli and Elle Bishop! Good on you, luvvies, proving that love doesn't have to be only between two people of the opposite gender! You're in inspiration to us all! Blessings and love to you in your marriage!

And did we mention Triesta Darkholme-Harkness? Well you've all seen her on the videos in our [video archive], stumbling about the clubs every night with a different person. It seems Miss Darkholme-Harkness isn't picky, either. She's been seen with a different boy OR girl every night for the past week!

So what do you do when your boss is a lying cheat!? Normally one would keep their mouth shut but Emma Frost just has to stop! Not only has her fiance not been seen in close to two weeks, she's been seen gallivanting around and being very snuggly with another WOMAN!! What has the world come to!? Is nothing sacred anymore!?

Maybe this is where I mention Anakin Skywalker and the mystery blonde he's been seen leaving and entering bars with as of late?

What's that, paperclip? There's still hope for the world?

Oh, yes, babies! And marriages! Those always make me smile! If I had been here back in September I would have put a month on it at the most but Logan and Tesla Echolls marriage is going strong! Next month they'll have been marriage six months and they'll be another month closer to welcoming their baby, whose gender has been revealed by his grandmother, Lynn Echolls shopping habits, as a boy! We couldn't help but notice tho, by some of the recent photos of Mrs. Echolls, that she doesn't look to be in her third trimester. Should some of us be worrying? Maybe she's not really due until July...

We're just sayin'.

That's all the dirt you dished to me this week, pumpkins! Go see my website to leave me tips for the next issue!

I didn't really think about the whole job thing, but the longer I have one, the more I realize I missed it.

I missed actually having a purpose; a job to do.

That was . . . awkward. Da, I swear, this time, I didn't do it.

Mini me Gabriel has reminded me of how much I loved Green Day, holy shit. I used to have to hide the albums from my mom even though I was 18, and later because she would always take them and ruin them because she didn't approve.

I've been playing them all day though, and damn, so many memories. I remember every single word too, and this was before I even got my enhanced memory.

Seventeen and strung out on confusion
Trapped inside a world of dissillusion
I found out what it takes to be a man
Now, Mom and Dad will never understand

Secrets go and change us but never forget
Skeletons come to life in my closet
I found out what it takes to be a man
now Mom and Dad will never understand
What's happening to me

Seventeen and coming clean for the first time
I finally figured out myself for the first time
I found out what it takes to be a man
now Mom and dad will never understand
what's happening to me

Whenever I was pissed I would go to my bedroom, dig up my cassette from under the broken floorboard and play this song especially on repeat until I managed to calm down.

Hah, good times.

I have a migraine the size of a semi-truck.

As if my life were not already hard enough.

So, I think I'm actually doing okay now.

Still get kinda lonely, but there's not much I can do about it, honestly.

At least I got a job that's not half bad, and a place to sleep at night.