InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Steal yourself"

in_the_grass (in_the_grass) wrote in wished,
@ 2010-10-09 23:34:00

Entry tags:

!2003: 10, !complete, severus snape, theodore nott

Who: Severus Snape and Theodore Nott
What: Checking up on the resident invalid
Where: Goyle's hut, Hogwarts
When: This afternoon
Warnings/Rating: TBA

Severus wandered the school as little as possible, in general, particularly on weekends. Making himself too available never brought about anything but grief. Keeping to his office, or some secluded portion of the library, was a much better way to keep from becoming mired in trivial complaints, and he doubted he was very much missed by the rest of the school's population. He had always striven to seem distinctly unhelpful.

But with no pressing business and no urgent mail, and in a good enough mood after having a decent lie-in, he had decided to make an exception. It had been a while since he had checked in with Goyle and Nott, and seeing as they apparently required reminders every now and again that they did not have the run of the castle whenever they saw fit, he thought it would be worthwhile to go and have a word. If nothing else, it would serve to remind them that he was paying attention. No one should be allowed to get too comfortable.

Halfway across the grounds that separated the castle from the Keeper's hut, he caught sight of Nott in the garden. His mouth tightened a little. He'd have preferred Goyle, as he wasn't sure whether lucid conversation with Nott was possible at all, but perhaps he'd still be able to make an impression. He approached him without hesitation, pausing only briefly to wonder why on earth everyone had suddenly felt compelled to get a cat. He was sure he didn't really see the appeal.

"Nott," he said, flat, giving him a curt nod. "You must be faring better. You've been rather prolific lately." And all of it nonsense, naturally.

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booksmart_devil
2010-10-10 05:05 pm UTC (link)

Theo had found the cat pouncing after a frog in the garden and once he'd shown it to Greg with an easy smile unlike many of the ones he had these days he'd been allowed to keep it. He hadn't named the thing because he didn't have the wits about him to do so, but it was obvious that he was infatuated with the small animal; he took better care of it than he did himself.

He crouched down and looked into the long grass to try and find the kitten (which had retreated to the windowsill without Theo's notice and was lazily watching him look) when he heard footsteps brush across the grass. He turned to see Snape approach him, staring at him like the former Professor had come back from the dead to visit him. He flinched visibly at the use of the surname but seemed, oddly, too frightened of the man himself to look away for his father, who he was sure would be the only person referred to as such. He sat back in the grass, pulling his knees up to his chest a little and holding himself close, licking his lips nervously, the tension plainly running through his still too-bony frame.

"You, you, you, you can't, you're not, not allowed to, not..." he stammered, flashbacks taunting him as much as the memories he didn't quite have, making a threat from an inocuous situation. "I wasn't eavesdropping Sir!" he said, much like a plea, suddnly desperate. "I wasn't, I wasn't, I promise I wasn't, I didn't hear anything, I didn't hear anything, I didn't..." he cowered back and closed his eyes like he was expecting a blow, his pulse racing as he panted to breath normally.

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in_the_grass
2010-10-10 08:35 pm UTC (link)

"No, you were not eavesdropping," Severus agreed wearily. The portraits had been the ones doing that. He wondered whether Goyle had bothered to explain to Nott exactly what had come of their little expedition, and guessed not - for much the same reason that he himself was not bothering to try to find any sense in his responses. "I'm only here to ask after you - will you get up?" There was only a mild bite of irritation in his voice. He was restraining himself. It was clear that Nott was still disturbed.

"Goyle's feeding you, is he?" he asked, a bit skeptical, and not really expecting an answer. "You do know I've asked him not to let you wander. Do you understand?" Probably not. But it seemed Nott was a little afraid of him, and though it was unwarranted, perhaps it was better this way. If it kept him to his garden, it was worth it. "That I've told him not to let you into my castle without permission?"

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booksmart_devil
2010-10-10 10:03 pm UTC (link)

Theo swallowed hard but looked up again at the now-Headmaster when the hit he'd been expecting didn't come; it didn't make him feel any less relaxed though, not when Snape had stepped off script.

"Sir." He said and immediately stood, a scant sapling of a young man, trembling from nothing like the cold. He kept his eyes on the professor who had once been something of a crush on him, now distorted into a figure of terror. He blanched at the unexpected question but was glad not to have the time to answer. "Yes Sir." he nodded, taking steps back towards Greg's little hut as he eked out some meaning from the things Snape said and took it to mean that his presence wasn't welcome around. "Not seen, not heard, not seen, not heard." he said softly, mostly to himself, his eyes still on his Professor which made his stumble and fall almost inevitable. Even on the ground he still sought to scramble back, terrified.

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in_the_grass
2010-10-10 11:00 pm UTC (link)

"That would be ideal," he said, a little dry - but mostly pleasantly surprised that he had managed to get through to him at all. "Better, I think we can all agree, if you don't run afoul of any of the students." There were stranger things than Nott roaming the halls, but students could be a danger, too, really. Especially for someone quite so ... odd.

Severus stayed where he was, not moving at all when Nott fell back - and watched as he tried to slide himself away along the ground. Clearly verbal communication was imperfect, and he was curious as to whether he might do better with something more direct. He suspected he could read Nott's thoughts easily enough in his current state, that the man could have no real defenses to speak of. But maybe it would be as useless as talking - if his mind was as badly disordered as it seemed to be, it might be like groping through mud. He didn't know. He had never tried to read anyone in quite this condition.

And it would certainly be improper, no matter how intriguing the prospect might be. "I'm not going to hurt you," he said, trying to suppress some of his impatience. "Why are you frightened?" He had no business being so, considering how many people were going to great lengths to keep him out of harm's way.

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booksmart_devil
2010-10-10 11:19 pm UTC (link)

All agree? When did it matter if Theo agreed to anything that happened to him? When did it matter even if he didn't? He didn't quite know when he was, but he knew that after this there was no way in hell he was ever going to leave the hut again.

Snape was staring at him now, looking, and Theo felt the weight of that gaze on him like a physical force, making his skin crawl until he wanted to reach and rub at it, tear at it with his nails until the burning feeling of eyes on hims topped. He whimpered a little incoherently to himself and then he was hearing things that made no sense to him. He stopped his backwards crawling, curling arms around himself instead, digging nails tight into his elbows although he didn't appear to feel it.

"No, I, I, I, I'll be a good boy." he offered like a last ditch appeal. "I'll be good, I'll be quiet, not heard not seen, please, you, please don't-" His voice dropped to a whisper and if he'd been terrified before the tone to his begging now was someplace much worse. "-don't tell daddy, please don't tell daddy." he shook, trembling, the mention of his father seeming as much a shock to him as to anyone else, the tears suddenly welling up there and spilling down his cheeks going by unnoticed.

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in_the_grass
2010-10-10 11:48 pm UTC (link)

If nothing else, Severus was gaining a more thorough understanding of what Goyle put up with every day, and he was a bit surprised that someone with so little finesse had managed without mucking it up completely, thus far. But perhaps Nott's lack of improvement wasn't exactly unrelated.

His lip curled a little. "Your father, you realize, is gone," he said, deciding not to go into the details of how the deed had been done. If a simple request to keep in bounds resulted in this sort of drama, he wasn't about to try to drive it into his head that he had killed someone. "No one can tell him anything anymore. Nor would I, were I able to do so." It was as close to reassurance as he was going to get. He expected it would be a waste of breath.

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booksmart_devil
2010-10-11 07:19 am UTC (link)

Theo drew in a sharp breath when Snape mentioned his father, as though he was shocked to hear someone else speak of him. He rubbed at his arm then slipped his hand to his hair, tugging at it and whimpering, distressed.

"Gone, gone and back again, back again, always-" he shuddered. "Keeps coming back and back and back and, and what can stop him, nothing can stop him, nothing, no locked doors, no h-hiding under the bed, no, nothing, nothing, only locked, locked up in Greg's mind, but no, even there-" he bit off with a sob and curled over into himself.

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in_the_grass
2010-10-11 01:40 pm UTC (link)

"That is unfortunate, isn't it." But interesting enough. It seemed natural, of course, that Nott's condition should have been caused (or exaggerated; he had always been odd) by the circumstances of his father's death. But he had derailed so spectacularly that Severus thought there must have been something else in the mix. Perhaps it was only the fact that he was a wizard. There were magical illnesses that only struck their little segment of the population, and so it stood to reason that the magical mind should be particularly vulnerable to certain things, as well, or might at least manifest certain effects differently.

All in all, he thought it might not be a bad subject for an article, if he hadn't had so precious little spare time these days. He would at least take the time to read up on whether anyone had ever bothered delving into the thoughts and memories of mental patients. It seemed like an obvious sort of thing to do, but Healers had ethical restrictions to contend with that might have made it a little thorny.

"Would you rather I left?" he asked, not sure why his arrival should have brought on so much crying and cringing, but - clearly it had. "It wasn't my intention to upset you." Most of the edge in his voice was gone, having transformed into something flat and academic and a little probing.

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booksmart_devil
2010-10-11 05:26 pm UTC (link)

Theo winced because 'unfortunate' meant that someone was angry and about to take it out on him. He braced himself once again for brutality that never came, this more than anything causing confusion in his mind.

He stayed in his tight curl, his arms trembling where he'd locked them around his knees, but Snape's offer to leave and the honesty he spoke to him with had Theo further confused.

"Wh-" Why are you asking me? he wanted to say. "Is-" Is this a trick? What he actually found himself saying was, "Whatever pleases you Sir" only it came out in Latin.

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in_the_grass
2010-10-12 02:45 am UTC (link)

The stammering was, at this point, quite expected. The spell - or what he assumed was a spell, having picked up only enough Latin for incantations and the necessary botanical references - was not. He had no idea what quidvis meant, but Nott didn't seem to have a wand, so it probably didn't matter.

"I don't understand you." He ought to have left anyway; he knew the answer was yes. But as much insight as he could get into the man's thoughts would be welcome, really. "Does that mean you'd like me to go?"

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	booksmart_devil 2010-10-12 01:36 pm UTC (link)
	Theo started in a way that was almost a flinch because that too was a indicator that he'd be being punished soon enough. It didn't happen, and he was given a choice again and he didn't understand how he was allowed to answer. "As, as you wish. Sir." he said again, this time in English. He picked at his pants leg but kept a wary eye on Snape. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

in_the_grass
2010-10-13 06:13 pm UTC (link)

"Ah. In that case, I shall go," Severus said, not bothering to refrain from rolling his eyes, as it seemed unlikely that Nott would notice. He had accomplished what he'd come for, more or less, although it wasn't all that satisfying to discover that there hadn't been any appreciable improvement. At least he didn't seem to be too much of a danger to himself, and he couldn't see Nott being bold enough to cause real trouble for others.

But if too much more time passed without any change, Severus thought he might just approach Goyle about some more invasive tactics. Purely for Nott's benefit, of course. "Good day to you," he said with an off-hand wave and, with one final glance up at the cat perched on its windowsill, turned to leave. It occurred to him for a moment as he was climbing the slope back to the castle that it was all quite unfortunate, but - that wasn't really worth dwelling on.

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