InsaneJournal

Who: Lillie White and... any and all Winchesters? Even the fake ones? DON'T CURR, HAVE AT IT.
What: Learning the hard way how to be a real Winchester.
Where: A diner in Lawrence, Kansas
When: Backdated to Friday morning, July 8th, 2011
Warnings: The usual Winchester warnings? Angst, language, more angst, etc.



Sitting in the diner all by herself, Lillie was a picture-perfect representation of completely lost. She sat in the very corner of the booth farthest from the door, back against the wall, feet on the seat, knees to her chest, one elbow on the table with her hand propping up her head while the other idly fiddled with the necklace hanging over her shirt. Her face was glum, her milkshake half drunk and all but forgotten. Never in her life had she felt more out of place. Or less like a Winchester. That was the real problem. She didn't feel like a Winchester at all.

She'd had Dean for a long time now – been Dean in more ways than one, and she'd been okay with that, but she'd never been Dean in the ways that mattered. That much was obvious now. She'd had her issues growing up – her mom dying, running away from school, being more or less homeless until someone cared enough to start looking for her – but even they weren't serious enough for Lillie to get her act together and stop treating life like it was a constant party, and Dean had never really been inclined to convince her otherwise. After all the shit he'd lived through? All of that was practically a vacation. Michael dying, though. Lucifer killing Michael right in front of their eyes. That was different. A wake-up call, if there ever was one. Dean accepted it with his signature Winchester resignation, but Lillie? Wasn't ready for it.

Which was basically why she'd been acting like a total flake the past few weeks. Cassie, Shane, even Justin had been taking everything bad that was happening in the world in stride, while all Lillie wanted to do was hide. They were all trying to help, and Dean wanted to help too, wanted to save the world like he always did, but what did Lillie do? She ran away. Just like she always did. This was the sixth time in her life she had run away from her problems, but this by far the one she felt guiltiest about. She'd been AWOL for four days now, and she knew that they'd be looking for her by now. Her family. Well, Dean's family, really. Either way, she'd let them down. Again. It was only a matter of time now before they realized she wasn't worth the trouble and they'd let her stay gone. Funny how that wasn't reassuring at all. Quite the opposite, in fact. It only made her feel worse.

"Well," she said forlornly to her milkshake, the only company she had at the moment. "This was pretty dumb." You got that right, came Dean's gruff response. At least, for once, they agreed on something. Small victories.