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Christine (spaghettitoes) wrote in spaghettific,
@ 2012-02-04 19:55:00

Entry tags:

au, destiel, rating: nc-17, supernatural

Supernatural AU Fic

Title: Deo Volente
Author: Spaghettitoes
Fandom: Supernatural….technically
Characters/Pairing: Dean/Castiel
Word Count: ~35.5k
Rating: NC-17 Ultimately

Warnings: AU – this story has about as much to do with Supernatural as I do. Death/Afterlife. Religion – quite a lot of it, the bastardisation of genuine prayers.

Disclaimer: The fact that I’m still not working on this show may explain S7 – just saying CW, I did offer.

Summary: Dean and Castiel are monks, ordained as priests and serving a quiet little village not far from the border with New Mexico. The two are getting to know each other when the paranormal intervenes and causes them to rethink a few things.

A/N: You could say I have a priest kink but you’d be more accurate in saying I have a religious kink. Too often a priest kink is presented as a costume thing and the rest overlooked but there’s something about the kind of person who dedicates their entire life to religion that is also very intriguing. This is the story of two people who find something in the other they had never expected to receive in life. Along the way they have to consider their view of the world and God.
Beta’d by my darling Wildepet and as AU as it gets; I’m only using the names Dean and Castiel in recognition of the fact that the characters look like them.

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Potentially a little spoiler-y so look away if you're still reading.

amo_amas_amat
2012-02-05 01:56 pm UTC (link)

;jgfij'iEFJefjvh'j#wdocjiv'do'sv jifEQIVIJIJCKXCKNJFJD#WKCNq'wdkxlsfvkcm'ODCK'ADCJDJCDJCdKCpOLDPCefcjov pfvKFJV #PVOVKM\V' JVLDKNFecjdvn'vdn'vdnkvnd'knDKDkvdkkdnndncjcn'NVCVND'KVDNKVDNKVDKVDNKVNKLNDSKKLC'WEKF'JRP

FAKFKFA'K

O.M.GEEEEEE GIRL.

MY LOVE FOR INNOCENT-ADOPTED-BY-PRIESTS-DEAN KNOWS NO BOUNDS. ZOMG. THE SCENE. WITH THE UNDRESSING AND THE WATCHING AND THE DISCOVERING WHAT HIS BODY CAN BE PERCEIVED LIKE. JFDJKFSDLJFSDKFSDKJ YOU ARE A BAD BAD NAUGHTY GIRL.

And you're right, he is so far from canon!dean and at first I was a little off kilter but really I just loved him. Actually the picture you posted in the other post didn't actually help me that much because I had adjusted the picture in my head with your descriptions and story-telling and then when I looked at the picture I went back to seeing dean/jensen & misha/whateverthatfatherindivineiscalled and neither of them looked as earnest or as innocent or even as beautiful as you had created.

I loved the way the love story and the ghost exorcisim intermingled and how dealing with the latter really enhanced the former and gave it good pacing and gave them space to consider their relationship more rather than being caught up in the attraction of it all.

I don't know why but I really loved all the hand-holding - the way they gave each other strength and confidence to deal with things.

Also dude you win at life for the "see God supports our love because he lets us do exorcisms" argument. Gay!Priests 1, Church Law 0. <33333

Also I loved Father Tobin a lot.

I like that you left Dean's beginnings a mystery (or did I miss it?) - I was wondering if he was going to be the child of the monk and the ghost girl, and for a minute at the end I thought he was going to be Father Tobin's actual son. Did you ever have any plans for including that backstory?

I love this so much honey! So hot and so well-thought out and executed. fjdifjvfvfkodvs

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Re: Potentially a little spoiler-y so look away if you're still reading.

spaghettitoes
2012-02-05 02:18 pm UTC (link)

*cuddle-bounces* yayayayayyayyayayayayayayyay!

I such a horrible person - making Dean all sweet and innocent and I sooooo enjoyed making/watching him come to understand that he can be physically attractive.

The picture in the other post isn't perfect but it's a starting place if you've never really bothered with the show/actors before (which for Eskimos means you've never clicked on one of Pet's links so I know that might be impossible!) And it was good when I needed to get back into mindset of innocent!Dean.

<333 I love that you were giving Dean an origin story! I never thought about making him the son of the ghost but that's because I was focusing very hard on ~~the smexing~~ having him be happy where he is - because he's had his life-crisis where he thought about that and realised where he spent the first few months of his life are nothing compared to all the people who love him and care for him. I didn't want any going back to undermine where he was or for anyone to argue that he loved Castiel purely because he was the first person in the world to actually want him.

And I'm just so glad you like it *squishes* It feels like the first proper thing I've written in a while.

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Re: Potentially a little spoiler-y so look away if you're still reading.

amo_amas_amat
2012-02-05 02:35 pm UTC (link)

Yes and I'm so glad you did that about not making it just be that Castiel was the first person to want him. That came across so clearly and was a lovely adoption story in a way with him being cared for by the whole community and valued by all of them. And I especially like the bit where even the Bishop had provided him counselling to make sure being a priest was exactly what was right for him. That was even more of a relief when Father Tobin's secret hopes and dreams for Dean came to light at the end.

And it is very proper! Highly so. <3333333 I love it.

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	dossier 2012-02-07 03:39 am UTC (link)
	oh, this is wonderful. the pacing is perfect, the story is so organic, twining around the characters and place just beautifully. I see their canon selves peeking around the corners, too, with those magic words, if only. awesome! (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Re: PRAISE FOR WONDERFUL WRITING spaghettitoes 2012-02-14 05:47 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you so much for your lovely comment! I'm glad you liked it and that the pacing/combination of the two stories worked. hehehe - yeah, I keep hearing I might not have strayed quite as far from canon as I thought I was. What can I say, those boys are really pervasive ;) (Reply to this) (Parent)

PRAISE FOR WONDERFUL WRITING
(Anonymous)
2012-02-07 11:19 am UTC (link)

I loved this! I actually truly absolutely loved this.
the depth of characterisation...the apt scenery and the story itself held such authenticity and warmth! It was beautiful and compelling to read. Thank you so much for coming to LJ to post this I'm so so glad you did. Normally I don't read long works with the exception of personal connection to the author but this. I have saved to read over and over. The purity of their love and the acceptance of Father Tobin. I just was so happy for it to end on such a positive note.
(only thing being I would love to know how Mrs Ramirez's sister ended up there...)
But again bravo! Just fantastic work!
(http://tinypic.com?ref=1238twl)

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Re: THANK YOU FOR LOVELY COMMENT

spaghettitoes
2012-02-14 05:54 pm UTC (link)

IDK if you'll ever see this but your comment is so fab that I grinned for ages and actually checked it wasn't just my wifey trying to give me a confidence boost!

I'm so glad you liked and it means a lot that you've kept it; this story was in my life for a good length of time to pull it all together and feel I was doing the characters justice so I'm really pleased (ridic happy) that it'll stay in yours too. Thank you for making an exception for me (coming from someone who also tends to avoid long fic...at least reading it!).

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	Re: THANK YOU FOR LOVELY COMMENT (Anonymous) 2012-03-05 12:40 pm UTC (link)
	I did see it after all, I came back lol :) you deserve all the praise for this fantastic writing. I have twitter too if you ever want another follower :) (Reply to this) (Parent)

winterlover
2012-02-07 07:54 pm UTC (link)

I couldn't stop reading until I reached the end. I really liked it!
<3

Usually I'm wary of priest-fic, I'm not so keen on characters trying to commit any blasphemy that is possible, just for porn's sake. I have read good stories but usually could do without the ancient bible stuff.

But how you're exploring the deep feelings of those religious people is what I really enjoyed reading about. I liked the protagonists instantly and the ghost-story was capturing (agree with comment before about wanting to know what really happened with Mrs R.'s sister) and the sex was very sweet and hot.

Your language fits the story so well, it makes it almost timeless. Hadn't there been cars and milkshakes, it could have been set in earlier times.

Great work!

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spaghettitoes
2012-02-14 06:01 pm UTC (link)

*cuddle-squishes*
I know I got you in Twitter but I just want to unceremoniously bounce you around and squish you a little more :)

I agree with your priest!fic comment - blasphemy by any means while completely ignoring that they chose to be in that profession! So I'm extra glad that you liked what I was trying to do.

*squishes you more in a squeey, appreciative sort of way*

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notoriouslyuniq
2012-02-14 03:52 pm UTC (link)

THIS WAS AWESOME!!

I had a bit of trouble at first understanding Fic!Dean, because Canon!Dean kept poking his head in and saying "that's not how I do things!" but slowly I began to see Fic!Dean for who he is, and his similarities with Canon!Dean were just cute coincidences (like how his idea of grace is “God knows I’m always grateful for food.” LOL)

I also loved the priest lingo, which you captured so well. It was sort of a mixture between The Sin Eater and Canon!Castiel, which is why I loved references to feelings you can feel, such as "no physical manifestation of his infatuation" *g* *is 12*

I loved the mystery and ghosts part too. I found similarities to Divine and The Sin Eater. Also, the Brother Cadfael show that I used to watch when I was a kid. It was about this monk who solved crime because he was the closest thing they had to a forensic expert in the middle ages.

I liked how you didn't make them cliches, but you can notice some aspects of their unique personalities, like how Cas was feeling more guilt than Dean. It makes so much sense since Dean knows what it's like to be loved, appreciated and cared for, even though there'd always have been a nagging sensation in the back of his mind about him being abandoned early on in his life. This means Dean knows how to appreciate love and affection and know that it's ALWAYS a good thing. Cas otoh, grew up in a more traditional family context but was ignored and neglected more, and therefore learned morality from religious texts. I think feelings of guilt and shame would have contributed to teen!Cas's alienation from people in general and pushed him further towards priesthood, as a promised sanctuary form those feelings (which is, I'm sure, the story of at least 60% of priests).

Like Anna, I also expected Dean to be the ghost and Father Tobin's kid. I think if you had published this as an original novel, you could have expanded on this further. the positive thing about this not being true thought, is that Father Tobin is not a villain after all. I liked how he's like "No, don't leave the priesthood! You can have all the gay sex you want as long as you keep it a secret!" I guess as the author, it's your prerogative to have an ending that makes your chosen kink go on and on and on, you naughty thing you! :D:D:D

LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!

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spaghettitoes
2012-02-14 06:21 pm UTC (link)

*stifles giggles that you used to watch Cadfael*

I'm fairly sure I gave canon!Dean $20 and sent him to the movies with canon!Cas. But I'm glad you could separate them out and yeah, most of the similarities were coincidences. I made a point when I was checking for the first time to remove things that were stereotypically Cas or Dean (like the head tilt) unless it actually made sense within the characters. Luckily, I didn't do too much anyway (I hope!).

Eeee - and yes, you noticed all the things I was going for with the psychology of the characters, basing it on their personal histories and experiences.

Re the ending. Funnily enough (and I'll show you my original notes if you doubteth me) my original plan was to have them leave the monastery because of the contradiction. But then I really got into the characters and who they were and I realised (around June cos I discussed it with wifey in Berlin) that Dean was just too integral to the community, not only would he have nothing but Castiel were they to leave but I realised that Tobin was basically raising an heir, someone to protect the entire village. Hey, it's not like the church haven't protected their members from worse acts with far less noble intentions.

*cuddles* But I'm so glad you liked it.

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	(Anonymous) 2012-05-03 04:30 am UTC (link)
	This was beautiful. Just read it. It was amazing. Thank you (Reply to this) (Thread)

	spaghettitoes 2012-05-11 05:19 pm UTC (link)
	bounce-bounce-bounce Thank youuuuuuuuuu Your comment made me so happy, I was just late getting back to squish you. (Reply to this) (Parent)