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meticulous_soul ([info]meticulous_soul) wrote in [info]mirage_rpg,
@ 2009-02-08 19:40:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Current music:Casey Chambers- "Rattlin' Bones"
Entry tags:complete, day 31, l lawliet, laura moon

I Left My Home, I Left My Love, I Left My Faith Back There.
[Who]: L and Laura
[When]: Day 31, Afternoon
[What]: L isn't bored, but wants to hang out with Laura anyway. She's that cool~
[Rating]: PG for now, for likely deep thoughts.
[Status]: Technically open, though they'll likely be forced!polite to anyone else who shows up, lol



It puzzled L, that Laura might possibly believe that he wouldn't want to spend time with her unless he had absolutely nothing else to do. She certainly wasn't easy on herself, when it came to the appeal she held for others. He could understand, when he thought about it as others might... but it was a forced way of thinking, for the secretive detective. He was the type of man who named spiders but left others hanging without even an approved fake moniker for himself. Except for Laura, of course. Laura was different. She knew to call him by his professional codename. It was closer than he allowed most people to get. And, yes, he considered Laura a "person."

The commons area was a well-furnishes, quiet room with a fireplace, though with agreeable weather like they had been having, it was not in use. Perching on an armchair, L organized his thoughts (as was his custom before a planned conversation), craning his neck and watching for Laura.



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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-08 07:29 pm UTC (link)
It puzzled Laura, that L might actually want to hang out with her if he had more important and interesting things to be doing. She certainly wasn't the kind of person that most people wanted to associate with on a good day, and the fact that he wanted to see her in the daylight, knowing what he did about her, was confusing. But, she did know that he was a detective. Also, she knew that he was interested in science. Therefore, she had come to the only logical conclusion that made sense to her: he wanted to study her because she was scientifically and something worthy of investigation. It was better than nothing, though, and she had been worrying about him all morning. When he wasn't at her group activity, she had become vastly agitated and upset. How was she supposed to be protecting him and keeping him from harm if she was being compelled to participate in another activity? She seriously thought about destroying that golem and making a break for it. She was glad she hadn't when she'd found out that it would worry L. But, really, what would have happened if he had been drowning, or he had caught a parasite? Her promise would have been as good as nothing.

She didn't really know that L didn't allow others to call him by name, let alone any name that was related to him. She knew several, it seemed, as he had mentioned in the journals. She was trying to pronounce that last one. Ryuzaki? Was that it? Rue? How did one pronounce that? Was it like the French word for road? She'd have to ask.

Being freshly arrived, Laura didn't fully know where anything was. Not wanting to be late, however, she opted to cheat and focus on him, on that lantern of light in the universe. She had seen through the resort, had focused on it, and she had followed it. Unfortunately, her power wasn't like a GPS system. It didn't provide the fastest route, and, as she was walking and not running at breakneck speeds, she was late anyway.

In the light, as she walked in, a combination of natural light and firelight, Laura looked...unwell. Her flesh was pale, somewhere between porcelain and blue, and, despite a touch of lipstick, there was a lavender quality to her lips. There were dark circles under her eyes that were so dark some would worry that she had been punched. There wasn't even the slightest rosy hint to her cheeks. Her hair, however, was glossy, chestnut colored and lovely, and hung perfectly. She would never have to worry about a haircut ever again. She was dressed simply, having bathed and changed after skating even though it wasn't necessary, in a pair of jeans and an off-the-shoulder, black top with long sleeves. She smelled heavily of perfume, something spicy and sweet that was mixed with clove, and faintly of chemicals and rot. Most startling was the large, V shaped scar that ran from each collar bone and disappeared between her breasts at the center of her chest. Her eyes, in the light, were dark blue.

"Hey," said, making her way into the room. Her eyes studied his posture. Well, that was a new way to sit in a chair. He looked deep in thought, and she instantly felt guilty for speaking and bothering him. Taking a seat on the chair opposite him, she crossed her legs, the edge of her black, velvet, high heel lightly hitting the table.

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-08 09:34 pm UTC (link)
Laura's appearance, though announced by the soft, coordinated strike of her heels against the wood floor, was startling, to say the least. L had not seen Laura yet in the daylight, and though she had clearly put a great effort into looking polished and formal (L would never have guessed that a pair of jeans could look that dressy), she still looked strangely... sick? Pathetic? ...dead? L bit his lip, his eyes tracing over Laura slowly, avoiding her bruised-looking eyes but dwelling thoughtfully everywhere else. He had a vivid photographic memory, and though the effect was that he was studying Laura, in actuality he was doing something similar to taking many individual, mental snapshots and filing them neatly away in his well-organized mind. Perhaps it was that distinctive scar, or the unnaturally pale hue of Laura's skin, but overall, it reminded L of autopsy pictures as well as the typical "profiles" he created for every person he met.

"You look very nice," was the simple, quiet verdict after almost an entire minute of cementing her image in his memory. Hours later, L would have been able to describe, precisely, every detail of Laura's appearance with the notable exception of the color and shape of her eyes.

Nibbling his fingertip, he set aside the book he'd been holding; not reading, but simply running his long fingers over the pages every now and then, as if doing so stirred up the very essence of the words within. The title was in Russian, along with the name of the author, and L treated it somewhat reverently even as he turned his attention to Laura. "How are you today?" he asked, very correctly, clearly doing his best to behave. A slight breeze through the open window allowed him to catch the high notes of Laura's perfume, tinted with cloves, and that slight, musty, dank smell of something most humans are afraid to identify for what it is.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-08 09:59 pm UTC (link)
The staring was a bit unsettling. She'd never had somebody look at her for that long, and that silently, before. She knew that he registered, now, that she looked...dead. The previous night he'd seemed different, like she was like anybody else. It was as if, now, the spell was broken with daylight. She was just some walking corpse, not the person that he'd spent so long talking to under cover of darkness. Was he startled? Was he unsettled? Should she have been more careful to hide her autopsy scars?

"Nice?" she echoed, as if that was the last word in the entire world that she would have used to describe herself. Shrugging it off, Laura rested her chin on her hand. "No, it's nothing special. I dressed like this all the time. Just because you're... in the past tense... doesn't mean that you have to dress in rags. I mean, I didn't get to go shopping in Chicago until after I had passed. It was nice. Lots of shops. And Mirage seems to have picked up on my like of nice clothes."

In contrast with L, there was probably nothing Laura couldn't tell you about his appearance, color and shape of his eyes included. She didn't even have to stare. It was the memory of his face, the face that popped up when she tried to find him using his light. He looked almost as tired as she did in the light.

"It doesn't feel like a different day for me," she chuckled, hugging one knee to herself. Her toes wiggled inside of her shoe. New heels were always tight. "I don't sleep. It feels like you and I parted ways eternities ago, though. Time is both long and short for me. It's complicated. I'm fine, though. I found everything I need in my room, as you mentioned I would."

She couldn't figure out the distance. Why was he being so reserved? Had she done something wrong?

"Are you feeling better? You seemed pretty miserable earlier. You didn't end up catching one of those parasites, did you? I hope not."

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-08 11:01 pm UTC (link)
"Yes, nice..." L said, tilting his head to the side. "I really cannot imagine doing so much, to look nice every day. It must be very difficult." L was clearly not interested in maintaining his appearance; words like "neglected," "wild", and "apathetic" sounded right, when he was being described by one of the few people who had seen his owlish face. There was something that impressed him, however, about people who took care to wear nice clothes, and take care of the way they looked. Was it really all simply habit, for Laura?

"To be honest... I have not slept here, yet," L said, the explanation for his own drawn, dull countenance emerging. He seemed restless, and slightly jumpy; L was a nervous creature when the sun bleached away shadows and shade, and caffeine was the only thing keeping his heavy lids propped up over eyes so dilated they looked black instead of steel-grey. "I found myself wakeful last night, and unable to relax sufficiently. Maybe tonight will be different... I don't want to pass out," he said unhappily, as if it were an unavoidable condition that came with his taxing lifestyle. Smiling palely, he tried to match Laura's affected cheerfullness, even though his humanity slowed him down.

It was as if a switch had been flipped, after the parasite comment. L's mind had finally adjusted completely to Laura's state, and he flashed a rare, radiant smile, displaying teeth oddly white for someone with his dietary habits. "Oh, it is you," he said, suddenly animated despite his weariness. He looked like a child who happened to live on coffee and sugar cubes, his youthful expression at odds with the alarming shadows in his eyes and cheeks. "I was not certain, at first, but there is no mistake now after hearing you talk like you did last night... you are Laura, and I know you, and I am glad that you are here." he leaned forward slightly. "I don't think I have any harmful parasites. Thank you for asking. How was skating, today? You did say that you would tell me, in person."

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-08 11:51 pm UTC (link)
"I put more effort into it, into my appearance, now than I ever put into it before. It takes a lot more to look even presentable. The only thing I can't complain about is my hair. It generally does what I tell it to, unless I have a cowlick. It's the only thing, sometimes, that I recognize as being the same. You get used to it, though. I like dressing up and looking...nice. It makes me feel good. It's the best that I can do. I have some obvious physical failings. I could let myself go. I could just not bathe, and not brush my teeth. I don't sweat and I don't eat; what's the point in doing either? I think, though, that I am still trying, desperately, to be a person. I am trying to be at least a shadow of the Laura Moon that I was when I was alive. If personal hygiene and having pride in my appearance is what it takes, well, so be it."

She couldn't imagine that he hadn't slept. It disturbed her. That flicker of her heart faltered a moment. Not sleeping could lead to any number of problems, none of which she wanted L to suffer. Picking at her nail a little bit, she was thoughtfully silent for a moment. "You should try to sleep," she said, looking up at him with that bland, cold expression. "If you don't, you're going to be more susceptible to disease. How am I supposed to..." She shook her head. That would be a little too aggressive and creepy. "Even you aren't safe from microorganisms, and I'm sure that someone brought the common cold here with them."

Pass out? That sounded even worse. She vowed to pay special attention when he mentioned that he was tired. She'd find him and carry him to bed, no matter where it was that he happened to be when he passed out, if he passed out, or if he fell asleep. She was certain that she could be gentle enough in transportation that he wouldn't be awoken by her carrying him. It would give her something to do at night and would give her an excuse for being perched on his balcony most nights. Wait, what? What was she thinking? Her brain was working in odd ways, and it needed to stop. She had no right to protect him, or to watch over him without him knowing. A pause. She was going to do it anyway.

His personality change was sudden, and she wasn't used to that. People were pretty consistent in her book, so someone who shifted so quickly was completely new and unique. "You didn't know it was me? Who else would I be? Do you think that there are many people walking around the resort looking like this?" She gently motioned at the dark circles under her eyes. Leaning forward, she gently stroked the back of his hand with two fingers, hoping it wouldn't unsettle him too much. She was ice cold. "Just me. I'm the only person lucky enough to be me." Sarcasm. It was wonderful when it was delivered deadpan. "Though I'm glad that I'm Laura, and you know me, and that you're glad I'm here. You had me wondering who you were with the whole distant personality. Was it really that hard to see me last night?" Her fingers absently picked at the scar trailing from her left collar bone. If one looked carefully, one would be able to see the thick, black cord that had been used to stitch her skin and muscles back together.

"I'm glad that you're all right." I was worried when you weren't at my group activity. "I would have preferred swimming to the skating, though more people may have realized that I was deceased when I was in a swimsuit." Realizing that she was still touching his hand, Laura pulled back, curling into her chair. "It was a little bit redundant, me skating. I already have superhuman speed and strength. I was very good at skating, and I was very fast. I was worried about the humans who were there. Not one of them was very good at it, but I didn't want to impose on them by helping them. You humans like to do things by yourselves, after all. I came off as aloof and distant, though I'm not sure that's really a bad thing. I don't even usually go out during the day. It's so hard to pass as a person in the light." Her eyes studied her lap, fingers picking at a loose thread on her jeans.

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-09 03:56 pm UTC (link)
L bit the inside of his cheek, listening to Laura talk about her beauty ritual, such as it was. It seemed like it would be an uphill struggle, as time took its toll on a body that was decaying. Though L's mind hopped naturally to that type of thought, he really disliked thinking about it too much, where Laura was concerned. It was true, that he had never been squeamish about death, but also that he had never known, personally, anyone who was dead. Laura was, in addition, his friend, so thinking about her in the past tense was more difficult for L. The last friend he had had, after all, was a suspected murderer who was infuriatingly good at hiding his evidence. Or... perhaps his apparent guilt had been the desperate grasping of a brilliant mind at its breaking point. L could never know for certain.

Perhaps any breaking he had been subjected to would be healed in Mirage. "I don't like to sleep," he said, a bit childishly. "Hours go by... things happen, and I..." I can't watch. I can't control. I am helpless against nightmares, a knife in the darkness, a flood, the tiny bite of a mosquito who just wanted to feed her young but happened to be carrying malaria or West Nile. "I don't like to sleep," he said, looking wary and fractious as exhausted people tend to. "Besides... we are on a different planet... I do not know if I will wake up to find myself on another, as that is what happened before... I can deal with change, but there is only so much I can take." he pinched the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath, letting himself calm down before he could get worked up over what he couldn't change.

"It's all right... the truth is that I remember people by their voices and their speech patterns. I am not particularly good at reading expressions or appearances... and if someone had been mimicking your appearance well enough to fool me, they would not have been able to replicate your exact timbre... speech patterns, accent, cadence... and so, I am now completely sure that it is you," he said happily. It might have seemed odd, for him to place so much faith in his ear, but he had had some frightening experiences as a child. Once, an assassin had impersonated Watari, and L had never quite gotten over that. While no one on Mirage should have any reason to want him dead, the looking threat of being murdered was as natural to L as the sun setting each day. "It was hard to see you... and someone might have taken advantage of that," L said, his voice as cheerful as it ever got. Though he initially tensed, at the touch of her cool hand, he relaxed much more quickly than he had the night before.

As Laura related skating and how redundant it was to someone who already possessed her level of speed and agility, he shifted slightly. "If it was fun, does redundancy matter, so much?" he inquired, glancing down at her hand as it stroked his. They both had pretty fingers, he thought, long and slender and pale, though his nails were more ragged. And then she withdrew, and that was the end of that. The way Laura curled into her chair reminded him strongly of his own tendencies, especially in childhood. It caused him to furrow his brow in perplexed concern. "Some of us like to do things by ourselves... but I don't mind a bit of help, now and then. I am not good at everything... I am actually good at a very narrow range of things. I would not have done well at all, if I had been left to my own devices on Earth," he admitted. Many examples came to mind, but he cited one in particular, wistfully. "My caretaker, on Earth, always made sure to arrange for me to be fed... even though I don't know the first thing about cooking. But... even if you seemed aloof... did you make friends?" L asked, wondering who else might have been there with Laura.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-09 10:01 pm UTC (link)
As she listened to him, Laura became even more acutely aware that L was fragile. He was so delicate, so like a rose, it was almost as if he was made of glass. She knew that human beings were fragile. That was not something that she could deny. L, though, was even more so, and she felt sorry for him. He was in grave danger with her around. She was a monster, and a dangerous one at that. Laura didn't know her own strength at this point. She always touched lighter than she was intending to, and it seemed to be about normal. What if she slipped? What if she messed up? That would be agony. Hurting someone who didn't deserve it, possibly killing him? No, that thought was too frightening. This was a bad choice. He'd said that he hadn't seen her much since they had parted ways, and he had seemed to genuinely desire her presence. That presence, though, was far too dangerous. He was at risk every second that he was with her. He was beautiful, and breakable, and fleeting. Hell, what was she on about?

Pulled from her meditation, she looked over at him, eyes staring at his face. "You need to sleep," she said. She had wanted to use his name, to make the address more personal, but she wasn't sure what ears were around. "It can't be good for you, staying up like this. I know that there's a lot going on around here, but you will crash eventually. If you don't give in, it will be messy, and it will be hazardous." What could she say that would convince him? Ah! That was a possibility. "Would it help if I said I'd watch over you if and when you finally decided to go to sleep? It seems that you had many caretakers at home, so maybe, if one could simulate such an environment, you would not be so vehemently opposed to getting the rest that your body clearly needs."

"Why would someone be mimicking my appearance?" she asked, dumbfounded but unable to effectively communicate her shock and awe. Laura didn't come from a world with disguises and intrigue. She didn't know people who tried to kill other people, not in terms of assassinations, and his words sounded like something out of a movie. "Who and why would they take advantage of such a fact? I mean, who would want to be me? That makes no sense. You really are overtired."

"It was probably fun. It wasn't horrible. I met an older woman who reminded me of my mother, and I met a man about your age who reminded me of my late husband. There was also some shrimpy blond kid there. He just grumbled and complained the whole time."

If he had vocalized that he thought that Laura had pretty anything at this point, she probably would have melted. She thought that she was completely horrible to look at in the light. Laura liked to keep her nails painted to hide the bluish tint to her nail bed. He was so warm, so comforting to her. Reluctantly, she pried herself away. It was fine. She didn't need to be reminded of how cold she was all the time. Touching people, feeling warm, only made going back to being frigid all the more depressing.

"What kinds of things are you good at? I don't mean it as an insult, I'm just curious to know if there's anything you haven't mentioned yet. What kinds of things do you need help with?" As she was asking her second question, he had already given her at least one answer. She was wholly unable to imagine a world in which someone had servants, or caretakers, as he called them. From a very young age, Laura had been forced to do everything for herself. She was fiercely independent. Her eyes studied him. Biting into her lower lip, she shrugged to herself. It couldn't hurt. "Would you like to go get something to eat? Have you eaten since arriving, or are you on strike from that, as well?"

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-10 11:31 am UTC (link)
Glancing at Laura, L wondered what was going through her mind. Being a genius didn't make him a psychic, and he was far from an empathic prodigy. He never would have guessed that he was in danger, of all things, near her... in fact, he would go so far as to say that he actually felt safer near someone with no reason in the world to want to hurt him. It occurred to him that a "friend" was someone who helped and allowed friends to help them, in return. Had he ever had a "friend" like that before?

"Ryuzaki, you fell asleep at work again. You'd better be careful, or something bad could happen." a smirk.

"It won't happen again." Trying to avoid the guilt, and overcoming sense that he was pathetic. That Light thought so. That Light was waiting for just the right moment to kill him.

"Of course it will. You're only human, Ryuzaki. You should get some sleep... in a bed, for a change. Then you can spend the hours we're both awake being more productive." So helpful. So worried, so Machiavellian and apparently caring.


"You're right... I do need to sleep," L conceded, looking a little bit ashamed on top of exhausted. He had a long history of denying his humanity to himself, pushing his body beyond its breaking point just to try to find that point, and overcome it. Once, he had asked Watari if he was an android. Watari was an inventor, after all, and L's memories of childhood were sketchy and fractured, at best... Watari had laughed, invited L to cut himself, and bleed, and heal, as humans did, and then to ask that question again and listen to himself. L had been bitterly disappointed, knowing that he had limitations. Knowing that he was, indeed, fragile. "It... would help, if you could watch me," he decided. She had suggested it, not him, and she sounded like she wouldn't mind. "It would help me, to know that someone is nearby... thank you." If a friend was someone who let a friend help... L could only deduce that he was, indeed, being a friend.

"You never know... people mimic each other all the time," L said, staring straight ahead and biting his fingertip, as he was prone to doing. "For many different reasons... sometimes it's subtle, even unconscious... other times, it's malicious." he shrugged, not elaborating further, letting what wasn't said carry his meaning.

He had to bite his cheek again to keep from breaking into an all-out grin. He'd known a shrimpy blond kid who grumbled and complained, himself. Mello, his maybe-successor. Were they already contacting the orphanage, to get some of those kids on the case he'd been withdrawn from? "It sounds like you met some interesting people. Is it good, or bad, to be reminded of home by people who seem like others you have known?" he asked, tilting his head.

"I'm good at some things, like everyone," L said, rubbing his bare toes against each other. However, when he tried to be modest, it usually backfired on him. "I'm good at learning languages... math... music... I like philosophy, a little, and astronomy, and entomology... I'm very good at puzzles and seeing patterns. I see patterns in everything... and I can't forget things. It is useful, sometimes, but it makes my head hurt, more often than not. It makes me see patterns where there actually aren't any, and... well. That makes me paranoid." he closed his eyes, looking like he just might drop off, but quickly opened them again when Laura mentioned food.

"I... actually am very hungry." he was too embarrassed to admit it, but he was incredibly worried about poison.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-12 01:12 am UTC (link)
When his face got like that, and she wasn't even sure what expression it was exactly, it meant that he was lost someplace. His mind had, seemingly, wandered off and was somewhere that Laura couldn't follow. She was glad, then, and a little relieved, when he returned. It felt like he was in a little less danger when he existed in the present tense. His mind, when it was caught up in itself, was a mysterious and foreign land, a place where she could neither find nor protect him. What use was defending and protecting an empty body, a shell of the person that she saw fit to guard? It left her with an even colder, emptier feeling than usual. A touch of the void, perhaps. The void. That was a scary notion.

"You don't need to thank me," Laura said, watching him. "You know for a fact that I don't sleep, and I get very bored at night. Everyone that I know on this planet needs sleep, and I would never be the one to insist on wakefulness. I remember, faintly, how a good night's sleep felt." She paused. Her mind was fuzzy, like a television channel picking up two broadcasts at once. "I also know what it is like to be afraid of going to sleep. You...never know what could happen to you when your eyes are closed for the night. Also, there's a whole wide and wild world going on out there. The idea of it passing you by is enough to drive a person mad. Add nightmares to the list, and I can fully understand." Her hand raised to her forehead, rubbing slowly. After a few moments the mixup passed. She could never tell who she was when the signals got crossed. Whose memories were those? Someone alive? Someone dead? "You don't have to worry about it while I'm on watch, though. Just let me know when you want to sleep. Or, if you feel that you haven't the strength to tell me, just fall into it. I'm perfectly capable of carrying you, and I am certain that I could find someplace to put you." Maybe her bed would be used for its intended purpose instead of by some crazy dead woman who liked to pretend that she was able to rest.

L liked to ask interesting questions. When she had come back, Laura didn't think that there was a single question that anyone could ask her that she would find difficult. Once you were in the past tense, everything seemed incredibly blasé. Still, he succeeded in making undeath interesting. She liked that about him. The fact that he genuinely seemed to care about her answers also made it a touch more enjoyable. "It's a bad thing," she answered in her dull, flat tone. "It makes me realize that maybe my world, in life, was too small. I thought that the people that I knew were wholly unique and interesting. They were special to me. I wonder, though, if they were special because they were mine, because they were all that I knew. It might be that they're just like everybody everywhere, but I saw so few places and met so few people that I never noticed how ordinary people like Shadow were. I'm not certain. We're usually blind to the ordinary qualities of those that we care about in life. In death, I find that I see people much more clearly. If I had met you while I was alive, I don't think that I would have understood you at all." I never would have realized that you are a lantern light in a world of flickering candles. I never would have known that you shine.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-12 01:12 am UTC (link)

"Languages, huh? The only language I ever knew, and poorly, was French. I always had dreams of going to Paris one day, of seeing the Eiffel Tower. Math, as I've said, was beyond me, though I liked listening to music." Her nose wrinkled slightly. "I despised philosophy and theology. It's caused too many problems to be worth anything. Also, no one knows if they're right. No one can ever know if they're right." One of those crooked, ironic smiles touched her lips, but it never quite reached her eyes. "Except me, though I'm not much of an anybody anymore. I bet I could argue theology with the best of them. First hand knowledge and primary sources always beat hearsay and theory." She shrugged. "I always liked astrology, though that doesn't have anything to do with astronomy."

Laura rose to her feet and smoothed her clothes off. Making her way to his chair, she gently smoothed her hand over his forehead, fingers lightly playing with his hair. "Does it hurt badly?" she asked. That deadpan made things very difficult for her. No matter how genuine she was, nothing ever sounded right. "I don't know how to help paranoia," she said, shaking her head. "Does the knowledge that fate is a random force and really doesn't have a set pattern help at all?" Hopefully, coming from her, such a thing was believable. She did not, in fact, know that for certain, but it was a personal philosophy. Still, it did explain why bad things sometimes happened to good people and sometimes happened to bad people. If it was just a random sampling, because her case, and Shadow's case by the transitive property, was a rarity. The gods very seldom took personal interest in anybody, and fate, being a force that ruled even the gods, probably took less interest. Shoot. There she was, doing philosophy.

Moving in front of the chair, she offered her hand to him. "Let's go find food," she said, as if it were the obvious answer to everything about which they had just spoken. "I'm sure that there's a kitchen around here somewhere. A restaurant would be better, considering you don't know how to cook and I no longer can taste anything, but I could make you something. I managed to keep myself fed when I was alive. It might not have been impressive, but it was edible." The fact was that Laura had been a fairly excellent cook. She probably could have gone to school for it. Her chili was famous. Unfortunately, she had always cooked by taste. "Maybe we'll even find you something sweet."

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-12 03:02 pm UTC (link)
"That expression," as Laura put it to herself, was what L's mother had seen every time she looked into her son's face. A phantom of a child, really, always somewhere else, living in a world with strict and complicated rules and where fear was the heart of being alive at all. His work and purpose had drawn him out, given him an outlet and a way to learn how to understand human beings like himself, but before then, he wasn't sure what he had been. Whatever it was, it had been enough to drive his mother mad.

"That's exactly it," he said, raising his eyebrows at Laura's list of nighttime dangers. "There are a lot of reasons to not want to sleep. Before meeting you, I thought that death must be like being asleep forever, and that's why I did not want to waste life in a state like that." Did those words make sense, especially if not sleeping was essentially self-destructive and ultimately shortened life? Probably not... but truly, L was exhausted. But Laura's offer was something he appreciated... someone to watch him while he slept. Maybe not cameras, or a roomful of armed police detectives who were loyal to his cause... but someone he had found no reason to distrust. That was an accomplishment, in L's book.

L had known many, many people, even if they hadn't known him, and only a few of them had been "unique." Incidentally, Laura was one of them. "If it means anything, I have never met anyone like you," he said, shrugging one shoulder in that controlled, careful way that showed how much attention he paid to even the most natural actions. "Most people don't understand me, and I don't understand most people... you wouldn't have been alone. I am happy that you feel you can understand me now, though," L said, an encouraged uplift at the end of his sentence. His own voice, like Laura's, tended towards an unsoothing monotone, but occasionally, he made more of an effort to sound like he had a feel for natural speech patterns. Usually, it was only because he was mimicking a pattern he had heard someone else use, precise to the point where it clearly wasn't his inflection.

"Français?" L asked interestedly. "My mother spoke French at home... it was the first language I heard. I liked it." He spoke it fluently, of course, but it seemed a little redundant to share information like that. It was like bragging, especially after Laura said that she didn't speak it well. "The Eiffel Tower is overrated," he said helpfully, instead. "Philosophy is something I enjoy but do not take too seriously... I like some of the Russian existentialists, like Dostoevsky... but otherwise, it is merely an idle hobby. Theology... I stay away from, but I am certain that your experiences make you something of an expert on the topic." He tilted his head quizzically when Laura mentioned astrology, since it was something he had little to no experience with. "Astrology? You mean... star signs? The sun traveling around the Ecliptic and passing through the constellations of the zodiac?"

He closed his eyes, able to better tolerate contact without visual sensory input. The soothing feel of Laura's cool hand felt nice against his forehead, and he sighed quietly. "Not badly... it is not a physical ache. I suppose that your confirmation of such a thing is more comforting than knowing that people kill people... and that some people are easier to kill than others, and that killing comes more easily to some." it made L dizzy, to think about such things. The last time he'd felt that sense of vertigo was in early November, on the chilly rooftop of that building, contemplating death and control and how they related to each other. Ironic, that he was here now, closely associating with someone who cared nothing for control (he deduced this from her statements about fate) and was an embodiment herself of death. He took her hand when it was offered, pulling himself to his feet. "I don't mind. Just as long as the food has some sugar in it, and no meat," he said, biting his lip. "I don't like the way meat tastes. Did you cook a lot, back on earth?" it was notable that L did not say something like "when you were alive," choosing instead to relate to a state they shared. They were both passengers of Spaceship Earth, now somewhere else.




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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-13 09:32 am UTC (link)
No matter how odd that expression seemed to her, no matter how much she wanted him to be there, talking to her, instead of being someplace else, Laura would never understand why his mother had done what she had. How could someone, who, seemingly, had it all: a husband, a son, a home, how could they just decide one day to end it? And how dare she try to take him with her? No child deserved that punishment. No child, no matter how evil, or corrupted, or strange, or distant, or disabled, or whatever else you may claim, deserved a parent like that. How could fate be so cruel? People like Laura, who liked children, who defended children, who, one day, wanted children, were left to die with not a single child in their lives, no trace that they had ever existed. Laura often said that she was glad that she didn't breed, and, after carefully examining her antemortem behavior, she could claim that. Her behavior was deplorable. Still, she couldn't help but remember how much she had wanted to be married, how much she had wanted that puppy for her and Shadow even though the landlord wouldn't allow it, and how much she had wanted to one day have a child and be a happy, typical mother, like all of the other women she'd known.

She found herself pondering for a moment, trying to remember where she'd been and what she'd faced about nine months ago. It was hazy, foggy, like those memories that belonged to somebody else but got patched into her own. She pondered, lightly stroking her lower lip with her index finger. "Death isn't quite like being asleep for a very long time," she started, trying to choose her words carefully. She knew what it was like, and that made her wonder if people would focus wholly on what she said. Would someone, one day, come back to haunt her and tell her that she was wrong, that death really wasn't like that? "It's like dreaming forever. When it happens, you wonder just what, exactly, reality was. A dream state feels more natural, feels more suited to you then. You're conscious and aware of things, and there are places that you go, but they define all rules, laws, and logic that operates in the real world. It's dream logic. There's some kind of purpose to it, some kind of reasoning, but you're never quite sure what it is. It's there, yet it hovers just out of reach. That is the best way that I can explain it. All I know is that it is most definitely not like being asleep." She smiled faintly at him. "That's why you should rest while you can. Your body needs sleep far more than the higher self. It can be tired, and while a soul can be weary, a body being tired brings about a quicker end."

"But, most people don't know anyone like me. I'll take it as a compliment, but it isn't that difficult for me to be unique. I'm a walking corpse." Walking corpse. It sounded so empty and accurate. She knew she wasn't giving herself enough credit, but if they had only known her when she was alive! This version of Laura Moon was a pathetically thin shade of what she really was, no, what she used to be. That version was gone, claimed by death. Though she had cheated the grave, she had not cheated death. He had taken his pound of flesh and left her with the remainder. Or was that the mortician?

As they walked, Laura looked up at him. She was always shocked to notice that he was taller. Then again, Laura had a very skewed perception of height and weight at this point. She was far lighter than she looked, so why shouldn't someone be taller than they appeared? Doing her best to adopt his pace, she slid her hands into her pockets. For some reason, everything felt okay there for a moment.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-13 09:32 am UTC (link)

"Astrology. Like star signs. I used to read a lot about it, but I always wanted to learn more. People would tell me that there's no credibility in something like that, but you have to wonder if there's any truth to it. Knowing what I do about the nature of gods and the nature of fate, I'd be willing to take a stab in the dark and say that I believe in astrology. Do you think it's possible for someone to be able to read the future, or to know with whom you're compatible, based entirely off of the alignment of the stars on the day you were born?" She paused. "Do I have a future anymore, if that were the case? Would you count my living astrology, or do I have another astrology based off of the day I died or the day I returned to the Earth?"


She very much liked his reference to 'back on earth' over 'when you were alive'. Though she didn't do it frequently, Laura preferred to think of herself as another variety of person, one who was just in the past tense. She didn't like the sound of zombie, and the other terms that she used were mostly ironic. If somebody had taken to calling her 'dead lady,' they probably would have received a swift karate chop to the throat. She wondered if maybe she should learn some karate, or another martial art, to make her superhuman strength more efficient. No, she seemed to do just fine. She could dispense of two grown men at once with little to no effort. It didn't seem likely, either, that she'd be involved in many rows here.


A strange chuckle escaped her at his mention of sugar in whatever it was that he'd be consuming. He really liked sweets, didn't he? It was impressive. She'd have to try to find him some candy or something for the next time they saw each other. Next time? Wow, she was already planning a next time. Was she so lonely that she thought that L, with all his intelligence, would actually want to make spending time with her a regular thing? No, she'd have to back off a bit, make herself more welcome. He was probably the type that was too polite to tell her when she was smothering him.

"I did cook a lot," she agreed. "I was married and had a husband, and we didn't have very much money. There just wasn't the option of going out a lot. My cooking was basic, and mostly meat based. Shadow liked meat a lot. I'm sure I can make you something without meat, though, if it comes down to it. And it's probable that I won't even have to cook anything. If the planet provides everything else, why not a restaurant with full wait staff?" She shrugged. "I know I went vegetarian for a while when I was trying to lose weight. It didn't work, though, because I liked to bake. I wasn't good at it; I was the kind of woman who could burn even boxed brownies. Still, I just kept trying. Never really got the memo."

"You haven't said yet. How did your group activity go? I know you mentioned that you're not fond of swimming, and that you were afraid of getting burned or catching a parasite or something, but how were the people? Did you meet anyone interesting or anyone who reminded me of home? This is atypical. I haven't been long winded in a good deal of time."

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1/2
[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-13 02:57 pm UTC (link)
"I don't like dreams," L sighed softly, a different kind of weariness in his voice. "They say that lucid dreaming can give one a new sense of control, but... I have never dreamed lucidly. And I don't think that it would be enjoyable, to, because... if I dreamed that way, my first order of business would be to wake up. The way it sounds... if death is like lucid dreaming from which one cannot wake, it would be very disconcerting. I don't know, that I would handle it well, even though I have thought about it and wondered. Everyone does, I'm sure," he added quickly, hoping that he wasn't worrying Laura. "I couldn't live in a world without logic," he admitted. "I am trying to define the logic, here, so that I may live... but it is very difficult. And... I mean that I have never met anyone like you," he said earnestly, a rare touch of genuineness in his voice. "And it is not just because you are a..." he bit his lip, not liking the phrase she had chosen despite its aptness. "You are a person in your state of non-living." The reason, exactly, he couldn't readily define. He found her very interesting, certainly, but it had more to do with the fact that she saw the world much as he did, and also the unusual realization that L had met a person he could actually learn something meaningful from.

That was it. He felt that he could learn from Laura. Not in the way a scientist observes and records and proposes and supports hypothesis, but maybe, for the first time, the way a person successfully related to another person.

"I have never understood Astrology," L admitted. "Though... perhaps I might try, since you have met gods and are clearly under supernatural power. We are both under Scorpio, by its rules, and it would be interesting to know more about what that means. I'd still count your birthday, and the beginning of your life," he added, "though I know nothing of the religion, it makes more sense."

"Why did you want to lose weight?" he asked, glancing at her trim figure. He couldn't imagine that it had been so different when she was alive, especially since she was restored to a state shortly after death... right? "It seems like people worry too much about things that don't really matter, doesn't it?"

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Re: 2/2
[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-13 05:54 pm UTC (link)
Though he was a stick himself and didn't know the first thing about wanting to lose weight, L couldn't begin to imagine why anyone would want to. Honestly, he had never looked at a woman's figure and judged her to be too fat or too skinny. Usually, like many men, he was too distracted by the extra curves to say anything about how a form could be improved. L had seen so many "feminine ideals" that were so different from each other that he wouldn't know where to begin; runway models, with their ribs showing like pouting Christs with hungry eyes... centerfolds with curls and lipstick and stilettos, laying on their sides with mascara lashes beckoning, and round, comfortable-looking hips... Aphrodite, not knowing her own seductiveness in The Birth of Venus, presented delicately atop her candy-colored shell, her virgin smile glowing with all that chased rationality from men's minds. All of them said, Here I am, and I shall not be reached or touched, because I am beyond reality.

There was a difference. Venus smiled at L from her painting. Real women did not.

"I didn't eat out a lot, either," he said, trying to keep his natural, long-legged gait in check so that Laura could keep up in her high heels. Sitting or crouching, with his wiry frame and large eyes, L often did give the impression of being diminutive, though he was indeed just a couple inches shy of six feet tall and mostly limb. "Isn't baking not all that different from cooking, though? I rather like brownies, even if they're a bit burned..." he hinted hopefully.

"The people... I suppose I don't dislike any of them," L said, as they neared the kitchen. "There were two teenage girls, one younger and interested in science, one slightly older and wearing very little clothing." he shifted awkwardly, as if even talking about scantily clad women made him shy and nervous. "There was a man about my age... and it was difficult. I do not like to feel like I have no choice but to do something of that nature, especially since 'fun' is very relative." L was far from self-sufficient, but he did read Dostoevsky and value freedom.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-13 11:41 pm UTC (link)
"So you couldn't possibly find any reason other than logic to keep living."

Statement, not question. In her mind, that was all she had managed to extract from his discourse on dreaming and the dislike thereof. Her heart of hearts, not the one that was all about beating but the one that was more about feeling, was consumed by an overwhelming sense of...something. It was powerful, and it was only powerful things that she could still feel: human warmth, clove cigarettes, anger. This was none of those. It was something like sadness, something like loss, something like emptiness. It was a strange feeling of compassion, yet that didn't feel right either. It was like the echo of a blend of emotions. Thinking L dead was somehow morally wrong. It was incomprehensible. Part of her wanted to respond verbally to this notion, but that would make her seem crazy. Maybe he'd assume that her brain was decomposing. That wouldn't be good.

Looking over at him, Laura shrugged. "You're too nice to me. I really can't get behind the whole Laura-as-person theory. I'm not a person. You're a person. Persons have personality. I'm lacking in that department. Though I like the sound of a state of non-living. It doesn't make me feel revolting, nor does it imply that I have a fond craving for the flavor of brains." She had wondered, once or twice, if zombies consumed brains because they, like she, wanted to be warm. Then she realized that it was absurd. Zombies wanted brains and nothing else; she wanted to be warm so she could have other priorities. Then again, maybe such was the case with her shambling semi-brethren. She shuddered. Would she, one day, be so badly decomposed that she wanted to gnaw on people and eat brains? For some reason she couldn't help but think of herself as a science project to him, and it didn't really bother her. His comment, though, was making the foundation of her 'I'm interesting to study' house a little bit shaky. Did he really consider her a friend? She'd have to try harder if that was the case. The dead made crappy friends, notoriously. The primary problem was that she wanted his warmth, and he didn't like physical contact. She only seemed to remember that after she had touched him, made him feel awkward. Maybe it would be better to back off for a bit; maybe distance made the heart grow fonder. Was she smothering him? No, no, he had requested her presence.

"We are both children of Scorpio." Huh. Fancy that. She couldn't help but smirk a bit. She used to have books and books on Astrology; every year she bought her horoscope book. It was said that only two Scorpios could truly understand each other. "We're supposedly intense, determined, powerful, strong-willed, forceful, bold, courageous, enduring, competitive, resourceful, researchers and investigators, with a secretive, mysterious, penetrating, psychic, self-reliant, and somewhat introverted or closed nature. We are also notorious for never giving up until we get what we want, and we're famous for our brooding and our elaborate plans for revenge." She shrugged a little. Pausing to think on the adjectives, she could at least see a few of them in L. He was intense and determined, that was easy to see. He was also a resourceful investigator with a secretive and mysterious streak.Introverted was a good word. For herself, she was more the power Scorpio. The one word that stood out in her mind was enduring. It was ironic. She sure could endure. Not even death could make her surrender. Was all of this part of fate's plan? Was even astrology ruled by some higher force that set the chess match up and watched the pieces fall? "Who knows if there's something to it? It was always fun to think about, though, and to see if the horoscope would be accurate."

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-13 11:41 pm UTC (link)
"I wanted to lose weight because I was convinced that I was fat and that I weighed too much. It doesn't matter to me anymore. My body is already far lighter than it should be for a woman of my height and body shape. I don't eat, so I probably won't gain, except for water weight from hydration and such. It is no longer a concern of mine. It used to bother me a lot. I was always complaining that I was too fat, that my breasts were too small, that I was too short. I'd complain about it even after incredibly intimate experiences. Humans do spend too much time thinking about things like that. I can honestly say I never really gave much thought to something important, like my immortal soul."

Laura Moon was neither supermodel nor chaste Venus, but she certainly could work as one of those centerfolds. She had, in fact, dressed like that. It was the only way she knew how to be sexy. She had never been pure, not for a moment. There had always been something a little bit soiled about Laura. For being given such a part, though, she played it well. What made her different, though, when she was in her stockings, corsets, makeup and heels, her eyes spoke something completely different than the cold, distant pinups of the past. She was a little flawed, and she was rough around the edges. Laura had been a real woman, and she had looked upon a handful of guys with eyes that said, I'm here. Please, touch me. I'm real. She absolutely hated herself for that vulnerability.

"Well, baking it is. You and I, or I, will bake after we get some lunch into you. And you can be my taste tester. Sound like a good deal?"

After a good deal of wandering, she finally found the cafe that she'd heard about. She ushered him in, almost afraid that he'd die of starvation right then and there. Apparently part of protecting him was making sure that he was taking care of himself; it wasn't going to be a bad job. She hoped that he wouldn't notice that she was looking after him, though. Grown men usually didn't want another mother.

"Girls?" she echoed, nodding some. She was mournfully jealous. Laura probably wouldn't look very nice in 'very little clothing;' that scar was incredibly intense, and anyone who'd ever been involved in crime or had done high school dissection would be able to guess at its cause. Still, she felt bad that he had been uncomfortble.

"I'm not fond of these group activities. I don't like to go outside during the day. Spending time with you, inside, is much more to my liking. It's safer. More shadows, and artificial light makes everybody look bad. I am hoping that I am not drawn into one anytime soon. Skating was boring for me. I wish it had been remotely fun, but I find no challenge in balancing anymore, nor do I marvel at speed. I did not make any deep connections with my fellow inhabitants today, and it sounds like you also came up blank. Still, maybe they'll stick us together sometime. Then we can at least talk right at that moment about a complete and total lack of fun."

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-14 03:16 pm UTC (link)
"Well... it is more than that... it is simply that logic keeps me sane, and my sanity is something I have that I value deeply. Without that, I cannot imagine living." Truly, in life, L would have been worthless without his ability to reason and deduce. Watari would have found a different prodigy, and he would have been a forgotten child with no salvation or hope of rising to status and renown. "There are many more reasons, though, to live," he said, glancing sideways at Laura. "Logic is, actually... only a reason to die. Without logic, we would all live forever." It made sense. Logic was rules. Death was life's biggest rule, one that everyone had to follow.

"Too nice? How can I be too nice?" L asked, puzzled. "You are nice to me, as well... and I like it." He reached towards his dark hair, twisting a strand compulsively. "It's human, to want to return what's given to you. As for the 'Laura-as-person Theory'... well. Gravity is a theory. It was never proven, as no theory is proven. Yet I have never met anyone who denies its credibility, and I don't think I will meet anyone who denies yours." he said the words simply, resolutely, direct and to-the-point. In his mind, that settled it; Laura was a person. "Also... you think. You are sentient... is that not a hallmark of being a person?"

He was intrigued, to hear the list of attributes that Scorpios possessed, and he would have been fascinated to hear that they were the only signs that could understand each other perfectly. He had never understood another person, even adequately... "From what you say, you are definitely a Scorpio," he allowed, a smile flickering across his face and actually reaching his eyes. That was happening more frequently, lately.

L couldn't even begin to imagine what problem Laura could have had with her body, even though she had named them. Though L did not consider himself attractive or masculine, he had never wished for more muscle, or a stronger jaw, or broader shoulders... it had never occurred to him, to want something his body had already determined he would never get. "I am glad that it is no longer a concern," he said, "because you look fine. And you seem to have a better perspective, on soul..." it felt strange to use that word in earnest and not mere speculation.

"It sounds like a good... deal," L said, stumbling slightly over the unfamiliar turn-of-phrase. "Lunch, and then baking... I am enjoying this afternoon," he said suddenly, as they entered the cafe and took a seat. A Golem noticed their arrival and started getting lunch ready, one platter free of meat and with ample fruits, eerily aware of the guests' tendencies and preferences.

L tilted his head to the side, clearly not understanding why women would be so different from men, on such an outing, and why Laura might care. "Yes... two girls," he said blithely, watching the Golem put strawberries on his platter. "They seemed to have more fun than I ever could, in such a situation." he was happy to hear that Laura also disliked the group activities... it seemed that they had very much in common, and it was continuing to prove so. "I like spending time with you indoors, as well," he agreed, nodding and leaning forward slightly. Eager was the name, for that combination of signals. Interested. Engaged. L did, actually, consciously think about those things when he made the slightest movements, they were so unnatural to him. "I would be grateful, if we were put together. We could complain about the same things," he said, the pessimistic humor of the situation striking him as worth laughing at.



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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-15 01:00 am UTC (link)
"Logic as a reason to die?" It was an interesting thought. For some reason she always associated a lack of logic with death. When people didn't think about the consequences of their actions, such as her own case, they often ended up with the worst possible result. But death wasn't the worst possible result, was it? She imagined that being a vegetable would be worse. Or coming back to the land of the living even though you were dead. That one was pretty awful. Death itself was not that bad. It was release; there was certainty. "Logic as death. You're getting Biblical on me. Yes, you are right in that sense. I was never religious, at all even. You could say that my family was aethiestic. I do know some stories from the Bible, though, and I know that it says that knowledge, logic, is why we die. What do you think would have happened if first woman, then man hadn't eaten the apple? Also, how do you feel about the whole Lilith issue? Early Biblical mythology is fascinating."

It hadn't been exactly what Laura had wanted to say. She had wanted to mention something about protecting him even if he was crazy. The image in her mind, of him having lost his sanity, was depressing, though, and she was glad that she hadn't said anything. He seemed insecure about it, and she didn't want to make him focus on it more. With him, at least, she was slowly relearning tact. It made her more brutal with others, but she could at least shield him from herself.

She almost snorted at the idea of sentience as the hallmark of a person. "Well," she began, "let's try to figure it out through logic." Reaching out, she grabbed the glass of water on the table. She sipped for a while. Her cells, her body, was always parched. "If being a person means that you're sentient, then that implies some degree of thought. If having thought means being a person, then being a person means having thought. However, there are some people who do not think. There are some incredibly thoughtless people. They are, however, still people and persons, so the logic seems to be flawed." Smirking faintly, she tossed her hair back, legs crossing. Hopefully he'd be somewhat impressed at her attempt at logic. It may have been flawed, but it was kind of fun. "How'd I do?"

Her eyes wandered to the Golem as it was cooking. It didn't look all that dangerous. She could probably take it on if she had to. What was the worst that it could do to her? If she couldn't win, she could at least end the fight in a stalemate. Still, part of her truly wished that she could taste. Yes, Laura could eat. It was not abnormal looking in the least. It did, however, present some problems. It didn't taste anything, first of all, so there was no real point. Second, and more importantly, it didn't really have anywhere to go. Her stomach and such had either been removed or tied off; she wasn't quite sure which. She was certain that she could investigate, but it would be messy. It had gotten so bad that she didn't even remember what food tasted like. All she could recall was the cold, dank, dry taste in her mouth, and how it got wet when she drank water.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-15 01:01 am UTC (link)
"If you like spending time with me, then call on me whenever you like. I am looking forward to baking in a bit. It'll be nice to be able to pull the pans out of the oven without oven mitts." Hopefully he caught the ironic humor in her comment. She was trying to be funny. "Among other things, I am, apparently, good at killing boredom. What will we bake, though? We should try brownies, just to see if I can keep them from turning into bricks. Do you like cake? I have a few cake recipes memorized. My favorite kind was chocolate cake with white frosting. Layer cakes were always better because you got more cake and more frosting for your effort. I'll make whatever you want me to, though, since I will not be the one partaking of the sweets. Please, place your order." She glanced at the Golem. "And with me, not him."

Subconsciously registerring his lean, she leaned in as well. It seemed that she was still somewhat responsive to body language. Her chin rested on her hands, head canting slightly so she could listen to him. Did he really like being around her that much? It was confusing. She hadn't even known anybody in life who had thought it would be that nice to have her around that often. Together. It was a strange word, a word that she was convinced that wasn't for the undead. Still, here she was. L considered her a friend. She would do her best to be the best friend, guardian, caretaker, watcher, bodyguard, or whatever else he needed, that he had ever had. It gave her purpose, and purpose gave her a reason to go on existing.

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-16 05:43 pm UTC (link)
"It is logical, that humans have limited time alive... awareness of death is maturity, and maturity is what pushes people closer to that inevitable conclusion. Barring illness and accidents, of course," he added, recalling Laura's circumstance. "Personally... the Bible contradicts itself so frequently and is so convoluted that making true sense of it is impossible. I think that a real God, looking for followers, would be a bit more concise. But... the concept of only becoming an adult when you are fully aware of death is very old, and very logical... and if justice was an ultimatum, only adults would die." he shook his head slowly back and forth. "Until I came here and met you, I was certain that there was nothing beyond death. That it was just... quiet, and dark, and gentle in a sad way. As for Lilith..." he said, circling back, "... no comment. My morals aren't high enough to judge those of some ancient author."

L was insecure about very few things, possessing emotional strength that was unusual in its fortitude, but it was true that he did worry about losing his mind. It was the one thing he could depend on, and had been since his mother had left him alone in a world that did not slow down for someone who noticed too much detail to move at its pace. He listened closely as Laura exercised what she stated, clearly, would be her shot at logic. "It does imply thought, and self-awareness, more importantly," L said, rising to the challenge, liking a good intellectual debate. "It is true that there are people who seem thoughtless, but if a person knows that he or she is a person, that is sentience. To think is not necessarily to be intelligent, but to make connections and inferences based on what one sees, hears, and come up with on one's own, influences aside. The ones who do not think, truly..." L paused, deep, deep in thought. "... the ones who do not think... the ones whose brains have been damaged beyond repair, or the ones who are trapped so deeply inside themselves that thought escapes them... the ones who are gone but not yet dead... I would not call them people." he bit his lip, leaning his cheek softly against his hand. "Your status has been established... but you are not gone. It is the opposite. I have just proven that you are a person," he said, "though your reasoning was very good. It often takes steps of that nature to reach a final verdict."

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-16 05:43 pm UTC (link)

A vaguely worried expression passed over L's face when she joked about not using oven mitts. "Laura, even if you cannot feel pain, your skin can still burn and I suppose that it will not repair itself," he said, knitting his brows together. "I think that you should wear mitts, even if it doesn't worry you." If Laura had known L as he had been even several days ago, she would have known a somber, unpredictable, and childish person who didn't appear to care for anyone. Watari was the exception, partially because of the role he filled in L's life. He was the hand that fed him, and the shield against the world; of course L would care if something happened to a person like that, because it would directly affect him. But even L's infant grasp of emotion, attachment, dedication... even his mind, such as it was, occupied with matters of life and death, could understand that Watari was different, because Watari cared about the person inside the letter. L felt a similar vibe from Laura. L meant more than a computer monitor and an electric voice, it meant a person. The fact that he was expressing anxiety over being burned suggested that he did, equate "person" with "Laura," reciprocating the phenomenon curiously. "I love cake. And brownies... I really love everything in that food group," he admitted. "Layer cake is wonderful. And a request, not an order." he thought about necromantic lore for a moment, about having legions of the dead available to cook for their master. The thought was somewhat disturbing; he put it out of his mind and felt glad that he had chosen to answer Laura the way he had.

The Golem served L's lunch and refilled Laura's water glass, shambling off docilely after a slight, nod-like bob. "Laura... some people know each other, here..." L said thoughtfully. "Do you think it is possible that others from your world might be drawn here?" he swallowed, "Because... I hope that others from my world are not drawn here... it is one reason I have to keep my name a secret."

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-17 12:51 am UTC (link)
If it were possible for that cold, pale, porcelain face to look surprised and unsettled, it would have. The things he said sometimes were wholly and completely astonishing. He made her sad in ways, but for some reason she could never see him as a depressing person. He was too interesting, and too understanding and kind to her, to be depressing. She was the first and only real friend she had since dying. He made her wonder if friendship wasn't as fragile and fake as she assumed that it was.

"You were certain that there was nothing beyond death? How? How could you possibly think that? What comfort is there in thinking something like that? In knowing for 'certain' that there is nothing beyond death, human beings find madness. They go insane for fear of the void. I read in a book once that people need to believe in something or else they will go mad. After all, if you knew for certain that there was nothing, then everything would be meaningless. Your own life, the life of those you know, and everything that came before or would come after would be absolutely meaningless. If there was nothing, nothing at all, then people would never get any answers. They would never find the solutions to life's eternal problems. They would receive no solace, even in the moment of their demise. What would be the point in living? What would be the point of existence? No, that doesn't work. It doesn't make sense. Creation is too big, too complex for there to be absolutely nothing. You of all people, with your strong belief in logic, should know that. If you subscribed to the theory of the void, the idea that the universe and all of existence has no creation or guidance, would be undermining the very foundation of your reasoning. A universe, an existence, a world, a life with no meaning exists in a state of chaos, the object of logic and order. I do not see you subscribing to chaos theory. I am so relieved, so glad for you that I know for certain that you are wrong. For if there was nothing else, nothing after, I would not exist. If the existence of a human soul was a lie, of something that's eternal about every single person, I would not so faintly remember finding logic and reason, and I would not so desperately desire to find a reason for my continued existence."

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-17 12:52 am UTC (link)
The thought occurred to her that, one day, L would die. It might not be any time soon, but it would eventually happen. As he had said, the awareness of death was maturity; at this point, Laura Moon was a long-overripe fruit as far as that went. It was inevitable. She, unchanging except for decay, renewed by the Norn water, eternally dead but eternally aware, would watch him age. She saw him now, in the beauty of his youth, but she would also see him grow older and older. Perhaps he would find love, would find a wife, would start a family. Why were such things impossible on a planet such as this? People, it seemed, were people no matter where they existed. She would watch his children grow, and she would watch him begin to decline. Eventually he would lose all of the things that he had found, for that was the path of life, and he would continue to degrade. He would, one day, wither before her eyes; he would be a shadow of this young man that she knew, this young man who was both substantially younger than herself and only a few years her junior at the same time. Would she notice? Would she see the gradual change, or would time, which no longer existed for her, simply hit her with the knowledge of that which he had become one moment far, yet not wholly distant, in the future? And once he had withered, had reverted to the ways of an infant, he would die. A lover of books, Laura was reminded of the elves who fell in love with humans in fantasy literature. Was that sense of sorrow, of being forced into the role of the helpless spectator, what they experienced on account of their immorality? L would die the long, dark, inescapable death that she, Laura Moon, would never know. She could never know it. It was as simple as removing the coin from around her neck, yes, but instinct still existed. There was still self-preservation inside of her. Perhaps, by that time, she would be able to give up, to tell someone or herself to remove it. But what if he passed away sooner? Was it possible that she cared about these things, and that was why they came to mind, or was it that she simply observed them as fact? If she did not surrender to oblivion, what would she do? Would she stand guard by his tomb? Would she protect him, her first post-mortem friend, forever, or would she forget about him? All she found was confusion. Did the undead feel compassion? Did the undead know friendship? As her mind raced, Laura's expression was clouded. It was as if she was someplace far away, where no one could reach her. She was a thousand years into the past and into the future. It was horrible, existing in all three spans of time at once.

As quickly as the notion had struck her, it was gone. "Gods are, by no means, concise. They're horrible tricksters, most of them, and the ones that are straightforward are usually more terrible than those who perform underhanded deeds. I believe that gods exist not because they are searching for followers but because they already have them. Real gods are horribly fragmented, conflicted beings. In a modern world, they are all but completely lost. They scrape together a living, barely managing to keep their heads above water. They are as mortal without their faithful as you and I... er... you." The gods that Laura knew, she absolutely did not like. That Wednesday was absolutely deplorable. The things that he did to her puppy...and he, in the end, had been responsible for Shadow's death. It was maddening. There were good gods, though. The Egyptian ones, the ones that she had met in her initial death, were diplomatic and kind enough. She could imagine, though, that those who upset them, or those whose heart did not balance the feather, would not find them so pleasant.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-17 12:52 am UTC (link)
"I give up. It seems that I will never be able to beat you in a logical debate. I will just have to do my best to remember how to be a woman. Women, after all, have the innate ability to counter all logic with anti-logic. Anti-logic should not be confused with illogical assumptions. They're not wrong, they just nullify logic. I will do my best to never engage you in such a discussion again lest I embarrass myself thoroughly. All I have over you, though, is fact when it comes to certain matters, though the facts that I know are mostly insignificant."

"I will not heal if I am burned. There is no supposition about it. Cuts do not cause me to bleed, but the wound will never seal itself. I do not bruise, but any broken bones will never be mended. The only way that I can repair damage done to my body is to stitch it closed myself. That is one thing that the mainstream media gets right about the undead. I understand now why some zombies and Frankensteins are stitched together with thick, black thread or cord. I have found that the planet has provided me with such a spool and an undertaker's needle. I know I could have asked for any color thread, but the black seemed appropriate in my mind. Maybe I subconsciously want to wear it as a mark of shame, a way to warn human beings about what I am. You don't see people walking around with visible black stitches in their anatomy."


She watched as the Golem delivered his food. For someone who liked sweets so much, at least he seemed to eat other things. "Well, you must not do too poorly at knowing what to eat. Since you consider sugar to be a food group, I was expecting the planet to pick up on that subconscious desire. Yet here your plate is, full of things that are good for you. I will have to spoil you later with a layer cake, then, if you eat everything." That wonderfully crooked smile spread across her face. She was teasing him, in treating him like a little kid. It was fun in a way. She felt distantly happy. At least she still had the capacity for jokes. "Chocolate with chocolate? Or chocolate with white? Or something completely exotic and interesting?"

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Wow, sorry for the long winded!
[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-17 12:52 am UTC (link)

Though he was doing his best to hide it, Laura could sense the trepidation in his voice. L genuinely did not want others from his world to appear. It seemed the closest to fear that she had seen in him. Unlike his concern for her, this seemed more like fear to her. "Some people know each other here," she echoed, nodding her head. Gathering her thoughts, she sipped her water. Her grip on the glass, though, was too strong. The glass shattered in her hand. Fortunately, the water was already gone. Laura was always thirsty. Something akin to blind rage was bubbling up inside of her. It was that same horrible anger that she had experienced when she'd killed those two men who were hurting her Puppy. She wanted blood. She wanted human blood. She wanted the blood of the ones that L did not want to appear. Managing, barely, to center herself, Laura looked up at L. Her eyes were wild; there was something behind that look. It was grave, and it was unsettling. "Some people know each other here. This means that it is possible for people from the same world to be drawn to this place. Do I think that it is possible that others from my world might be drawn here? Yes, I know for a fact that it is possible. Do I think it is possible that others from your world might be drawn here? Yes, I know for a fact that it is possible." One icy hand reached out as she stood up, leaning over the table. She took his hand with her icy one. Her strength was incredible. Her grip was firm, like a knight swearing allegiance to a lord. Her unblinking eyes stared straight into his face. "I swear to you, however, that if any of the people from your world appear, that wicked boy with a murderous notebook who was supposedly your friend, or his wicked bitch of a girlfriend, or anyone else that you find unsavory, I will protect you. I will protect you. They will get one warning from me. I will make sure that they understand the gravity of that warning. If they harm so much as the air around you, if they try anything at all, then I will claim their heads and make their lives a living Hell." Not wanting to hurt him, she let his grip go. Drawing back into her chair, curling into herself, Laura became a ball of brooding darkness in that instant. If they came, they would have only one opportunity. They would suffer at her hands. Even if she could not kill, she could wound. What was the worst that they could do, write the name of a woman already dead in their notebook? Let them try. She chuckled darkly, shaking her head as the Golem cleaned the glass and set a new glass of water before her. She sipped at the crystal liquid. Let them try.

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lol, it's all good. I admire your skillz and endurance, lol
[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-17 08:59 pm UTC (link)
"It isn't comforting... but most of what is comforting in the world is a lie, I've found," L said, taking a bit of melon delicately between his thumb and forefinger and savoring a small bite. "Maybe I believe in justice, and the idea that the world will be a better place when I am gone for future generations until there aren't any human beings left. On earth, that will happen, someday... the Sun will expand and engulf the Solar System, eventually, even if humans survive as a species for that long. It is maddening, and pointless... but maybe that's what makes humans what we are. We challenge everything, fight against the impossible, work towards a goal we can never achieve. We give our lives for causes that are subjectively good or evil, and dedicate them to what some humans have called noble and others have named corrupt. But... like you... I am glad that I am wrong. I am glad to know that there is something after," he admitted, conceding softly and gracefully as he truly was relieved.

"I like hearing about the gods from your world. It's all very interesting," he said, nodding to emphasize his fascination with the topic. He had no idea that she was, even now, thinking about his death... but it would have disquieted him, to think of her state of existence and how it made time seem nonexistent. How, if the way time passed for a person was relative based on their lifespan, his life would pass Laura by in a flash. It would have been strange, to attempt to relate to Laura with the knowledge that he would soon be dead, really dead, in her perception of time.

"Ah... it is unfair, to women, to generalize that way," L chided gently. "I have known some logical women. 'Anti-logic,' given your premises from your world and how they work with the ones in mine, is an apt way of putting it, though your logic is far from bad. Please don't think that you need to avoid this topic of conversation, as I enjoy it thoroughly."

Even the mention of black stitches, horrific and reminiscent of Frankenstein as it was, couldn't distract L from the promise of layer cake. Not that L found Frankenstein horrific; this was the man who had been disappointed to hear that he wasn't something like a Frankenstein monster. "Chocolate... and chocolate," he decided, his simple desire for something familiar winning out. "Perhaps, once this place feels more like home... we can try to make something exotic."

He started slightly at Laura's sudden change in demeanor, when she heard that he was, in short, afraid of meeting with others from his world. With Light, in particular. He flinched, his shoulders tensing, when the glass shattered. "Laura... it's OK," he said as she took his hand, his eyes wary. They widened when she made her solemn promise, and he was speechless for several moments after she returned to her seat.

"Laura... you... really mean that?"

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-17 09:30 pm UTC (link)
Laura was in her dark place, a place much darker than that which many considered theirs. Her darkness was the pitch black of the underworld, a realm that she would probably never see again. Her eyes looked through the world, saw its pitch black underbelly, the place that remained once the sun had swallowed everything. That, she assumed, would be her own death. The coin, after all, couldn't survive the apocalypse, nor could gods. His voice reached her like an echo. She had completely shut down and was brooding. Her mind was a whirling vortex of confusion. She was not human. She could not feel anything anymore. Logic, fact, truth, these were the things in which the dead were interested. Yet here she was, her core a swirl of emotion that she was wholly unable to control. It was frustrating, it was baffling, it was disturbing. Why? Why did she care so much? Why had she sworn an oath to a human being? She'd only given promises like that to Shadow, and they hadn't truly been verbal. She didn't feel, yet she felt this with every fiber of her being.

Looking up at him very slowly through the curtain of her dark, chestnut colored hair, Laura gripped at the arms of her chair. Her eyes stared at him, locked on him. He was afraid of her. She had seen him flinch. Yes, good then. Let him fear her. It was normal. It was human. She was anti-life, undeath, a state which negated life and light completely. She was a destructive force, an unstoppable one woman army.

"Yes," was her reply, and it came out quietly though dull and flat. That voice. She hated that voice. There was so much inside of her, yet he would never know a shadow of it.

She was wholly unable to look at him, thoroughly ashamed for herself. What was she doing? What was she thinking? She wasn't, maybe that was the problem. If she wasn't thinking, then, what was she doing? Feeling? It seemed, though, that it was only intense emotions that got through. Anger was one. Anger was the big one. Emptiness, the sense of the void, was also there. What, then, was this? How did she feel about him? Protective wasn't a strong emotion. It wasn't even an emotion that most humans bothered with. She could not experience the whole range of human emotion. Her hands nervously slid up and down her arms, rubbing some warmth into them, though she knew it wouldn't work. Friction wasn't human flesh.

"Chocolate with chocolate," she echoed, nodding slowly. Push it down, she thought, push it away. Not now. You have plans now. He's your friend now. There's no danger now. He's not likely to ever need your protection. Something in the back of her mind, though, echoed, playing devil's advocate. But what when he does? it said. What will you do when he needs your protection? Will you stalk him? Follow him? Breathe down his neck? Live in his room? You are dead, but you are not invisible. No matter how many shadows you hide in, you will be too far away. Just like your husband, he will die. A small smile spread across her face. It did not look even half hearted like her usual ones. The dead really didn't have time for lying. "I'm excited to make that cake," she said. "It will be fun and challenging for me. Far more fun than group activities."

So Laura had a purpose. Her existence once again had reason. As she had been to Shadow, no, even more, she was to be bodyguard. She was to be both protector and companion. Still, that purpose did not bring clarity.

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-20 01:47 pm UTC (link)
The oath was as strange to L as it was to Laura. As she had never sworn an oath to someone this way, he had never been the subject of such an oath, and it was not something he had any sort of experience with. The closest, perhaps, had been Watari's protection... but there had been ulterior motives there, and a reason for the old man to guard him. L was a national treasure because of his brain, and it made sense that someone would look after him and prioritize his safety in that way. But why Laura? Why was she sincerely giving him a promise that implied that he meant something to her past what his mind could do?

It was one of the most purely human things L had ever seen, and despite Laura's nature and insistence to the contrary, he recognized it and resolved to treat it reverently. "Thank you," he responded, a soft response to her dull "yes." The Golem returned and began to sweep up the scattered shards of broken glass, placing another (plastic) cup of water in front of Laura seamlessly.

Aware that Laura was now avoiding his eyes, for a change, L wondered if it was possible that he had done something wrong. He was relieved when she brought up their baking plans again; she seemed to cheer up with that topic, though L couldn't be quite sure. He was terrible at understanding the subtleties of emotion, and Laura was better than most at bewildering him. "It will be fun," he agreed readily, holding a bit of apple delicately. "We can help each other, yes? I'll take care of the oven and the cutting, if there is anything like that to be done, so that you do not cause unrepairable damage." In L's mind, it made perfect sense; if he was cut or burned, he'd feel it, of course, but that was a defense as well, wasn't it? And even if he wasn't able to draw back in time, he would heal. Laura wouldn't.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-21 11:41 am UTC (link)
If L wanted, or came across, the simple answer, it was that Laura cared about him. It was that easy. She had no vested interest in what he did, and his mind humbled her and impressed her, but there wasn't much that it could do for her. He should be using the power of his thoughts to help his fellow living people. There was nothing that she really needed help with. She didn't know that he was intelligent enough to be considered a national treasure, and she didn't know that people wanted to use him. How could they? He was too kind, too gentle, for someone to do something that cruel. So, yes, he meant something past his mind, far past his mind, to Laura. He was her charge, her lamb, her flock, and it was her job to keep the wolves away. She would give her life for it.

"You don't need to thank me for something that I gladly and freely give. It's not a gift or anything, and I'm sure that it's highly possible that you'll get sick of me hovering over you. Still, just let me know when that day comes, and I will continue to fulfill my promise. Until that day when I can no longer move, for one reason or another, I will be guarding you. Fortunately, I think my job is a lot easier here than it is on Earth."

The plastic cup was almost an insult, but she had experienced too much to get angry. The rage inside of her, that someone could want to hurt him of all people, was still burning like a coal in the pit of her stomach. She sipped at the water, delicately holding the glass this time. The Golem had subconsciously scolded her like a naughty child by denying her a glass. It felt like the times when Shadow had told her to stop drinking at a party, or when Robbie told her to stop drinking once Shadow had gone to jail.

Resting her chin in her palm, she smiled lopsidedly at him, giving a little shrug. "Help each other, huh? Well, I can get behind that, even though I wanted to be the hero of the day and wow you with my cake. It will probably turn out better since you have taste buds. I'll even let you lick the spoon. But irreparable damage isn't that bad. What's a missing finger or two? I'd have another eight. Hopefully it wouldn't be the thumb, though. That would be inconvenient. I could always just stitch it back on. It'll be better if we can work together, though." Huh. He really had a unique way of eating, didn't he? Everything looked like it was made of glass or spun sugar the way he held it. "It will make the work go faster, and the faster we bake the cake, the sooner you get to eat it."

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-21 05:26 pm UTC (link)
"I'm used to being watched," L said, tugging a strand of his hair. "It does not bother me. On the contrary, it makes me feel safer." he shivered slightly. His memories of childhood were so fractured, and disjointed, and sketchy... but he seemed to recall that bad things could happen to people when they were alone, especially to children... and he was so like a child, even now. "But... no one has ever given me a promise like that before. I wish I knew how to appreciate it fully," he said wistfully. Didn't it bother Laura, that she was devoting most of her time to his well being? How was it possible that she was doing something so altruistic for him without any expectation of something in return? It wasn't consistent with humanity's tendencies... and so that was point one for Laura's theory of inhumanity.

"The hero of the day?" L asked, biting his lip to keep from smiling too much. The image was humorous... something like Laura with a broadsword and shield, some sort of undead warrior valkyrie, holding aloft a cake. He chose not to critically correct her exaggeration, since he did want cake and didn't mind considering it a little more heroic than it actually was to bake one. "Faster, yes... but I would still rather that there was no irrepairable damage," he insisted. "A missing finger would be terrible... take it from a violinist. There is nothing worse, than the prospect of a missing finger. It is almost worse than a missing arm."

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-02-22 03:53 pm UTC (link)
"Used to being watched?" Laura liked to echo things that she didn't exactly understand. "I cannot imagine such a thing. No one watched or looked after me for very much of my life. I was always a fiercely independent creature, or I pretended to be. Perhaps that still remains in me. Perhaps that is the drive that makes me keep going." Though I am impossibly codependent at this point. I need others to give my existence meaning. Laura would have gladly traded her memories for his fragmented ones. Childhood wasn't her favorite thing to think about. She preferred to think of herself like Aphrodite sprouting fully grown from the sea foam. Then again, there was no sea in Indiana, so that would prove a little difficult. "As long as it makes you feel safe, though, and not boxed in, you can count on me to keep an eye on you."

It hadn't occurred to her to ask for something in return for all of the time devoted to him. She was content to just not be alone. She was cold, yes, but at least she wasn't cold and alone. She was not sleeping in forests and avoiding the light that human beings gave off, trying her best not to frighten them. He enabled her to be seen, to be somebody. That was enough. It was the least selfless thing she could do, as she felt that she no longer had a sense of self.

Head canting slightly, she shrugged. "Well, the fact that you appreciate it at all is enough. Don't worry about being adequate. Don't worry about anything. How about we forget I made it, if it's a problem, and we just pretend that we're normal? That way you won't think about me watching you when you sleep or standing on your balcony when we're not together." She smirked. Hopefully he'd find it a joke, but she was serious. Every moment that she wasn't with him, she would probably be in some shadow near him. Who knew when danger could strike?

"I'll leave it to the violinist," Laura mused, sliding her hand through her hair. "I don't have any musical talent aside from karaoke, and I think I'm probably not even good at that anymore. I haven't used my vocal chords in that way in a while, so they probably don't stretch that much. I've agreed to let you do the cutting, though you have to promise me that you'll be careful. I don't want you doing damage to yourself on my account. I can take a licking. Your body isn't so great at sucking damage. I'm thinking that we could decorate the top of the cake with some sliced strawberries. Strawberries and chocolate usually taste pretty good together, if I remember correctly. Unless you'd prefer cherries?" Cooking seemed so mundane, so ordinary, that she almost forgot that she was dead for a moment. It was something she genuinely liked. Maybe she'd take it up in the wee hours of the morning. Greeting L with sweet treats for breakfast would be the least that she could do if she was going to be watching him at all times. He wouldn't even have to see her; she could hit and run, leaving it sitting outside of his door on a tray. That sounded like a plan.

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[info]meticulous_soul
2009-02-24 07:50 pm UTC (link)
"No... never 'boxed in,'" L said, as if the concept was foreign to him. "I can't imagine not being watched, even if I feel like I am in an aquarium sometimes. I suppose that it is good to know... that if a fish is chased or starts to turn over so its back is to the stones, someone will see it."

L, being of a staggeringly literal mindset, did take Laura's comment seriously, but didn't seem fazed by it. It was an extension of being watched, which he was used to... though he did wonder a bit about the "standing on the balcony" bit. He was impressed by her dedication, anyway. "We don't need to forget anything," he said, mimicking the head-canting, since he rather liked the gesture. It seemed to say, "I am trying to see things from your perspective. I am open-minded, tell me more," and he often wanted Laura to know that he was thinking that without going through the trouble of voicing it out loud. "We can pretend we're normal, though," he said meaningfully. It was appealing to him, that particular concept. He, like Laura, had spent a lot of time in the dark lately.

He watched curiously as she touched her hair, not copying the motion, but definitely fighting the urge to. "I can't sing... maybe you still can," he suggested. "You should try, maybe... and yes, I will be careful, of course. I'm clumsy, but I know enough not to cut myself." he perked up noticeably when Laura mentioned the options for decorating the cake. "I like cherries, best... they are my favorite thing to eat, even though it is hard to choose. But I like many things," he added reassuringly. "I am not terribly picky, when it comes to this type of food. I like sweet things." he licked his fingertip, since a bit of whipped cream had been messier than he'd calculated.

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[info]spitandviolets
2009-03-01 04:11 pm UTC (link)
"Normal. That would be good. I'm not sure I'd know how to start being normal, though. It's been so long. I mean, what is normal, anyway? It's defined by other people who aren't normal, really. They're just as strange as the rest of us in their own ways. I will do my best, however. I won't make any references to being dead or anything for as long as possible." She chuckled softly, winking at him. This would be a fun challenge. L made her feel more normal, more alive, so it wouldn't be that hard. Just be friends. That was the beauty of it.

"I'm supposed to be protecting you and making sure you don't get hurt. In the interest of that mission, I think it better that I not sing in your presence. Maybe in the privacy of my own room, when nobody's listening, but not in front of you. That would be painful and embarrassing for me. But I am convinced that you could sing if you tried. It's not very hard. It's talking in rhythm. Maybe we'll go someday. You can bring some people you'd like to see make fools of themselves. It'll be a grand time."

Cherries? He liked cherries best. She filed that away in her mental bank. It would be useful in the future when she wanted to surprise him. "We can do cherries," she agreed. "They'll look nice on chocolate frosting, I think. And they'll add a bit of extra flavor." He also wasn't picky. That was useful. It helped to pay attention to him. He was hard to read, so she had to pick up clues where she could.

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