InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "This is one long fortune."

Kitty Pryde (Shadowcat) (kitty_has_claws) wrote in marinanova,
@ 2017-03-18 23:13:00

Entry tags:

:mingle, aidan reilly, ianto jones, jack harkness, kitty pryde (aoa), nico di angelo, pavel chekov (au), suzaku kururugi, ton phanan

[Day 419] [Mingle / Closed to Defense Force]
[Kitty waits until the team gathers into the Defense Force headquarters. Once upon a time this team was big enough that having a meeting inside would have been uncomfortable. That hasn't been true for awhile. She loudly taps a pen against a desk a few times to get everyone's attention before she starts.]

You were probably hoping I scheduled this surprise meeting so I could deliver a long speech at you, and your hopes are being fulfilled. [A pause as she once again considers not moving forward with this.] I have been thinking about the Defense Force and where it started and how it's changed and the direction it could or maybe even should move in for awhile now. We're a smaller team than we once were and I've been wanting to refocus our efforts more on the investigation side of things, but our numbers don't reflect that. I think a lot of us are here because we do something similar back home. We protect. We fight. We have a team to support us. We wanted that here too, but I'm not sure the needs of this prison support that now. I'm not sure they ever did. I'm not saying we haven't had successes. We have. I'm proud of what we built and what we've accomplished even if it's surprising how completely unpopular a team for saving lives and getting people home is. [She's taken the brunt of that message too. Complaints and criticisms from what they did to stop Spike from attacking people to just not getting everyone home within a few months time against impossible odds.]

I think it's time for a fresh take on this idea. And the thing is... It's not going to be with me. [Just looking out at everyone.] I don't think leading a team is what I should be doing right now. It's meant a lot to me. It's been the only thing that got me through some hard times. But it's not here for that.

I've talked to Jack and he's not going to be moving into the role either, so where this leaves us is kind of up to all of you. And before anyone volunteers I just want to say take some time to think about it. Think about whether you have a direction and a passion for it. Also, it won't be my call to make what happens next, so you'll just have to see if others will follow if you want to lead. Which means, for the moment, there is no Defense Force.

[And with that her speech is over. Time to see what comes next.]

(OOC: Discussion post.)

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	kitty_has_claws 2017-03-19 12:41 am UTC (link)
	[Talk to Kitty after her announcement here.] (Reply to this) (Thread)

whiteknightmare
2017-03-19 11:28 am UTC (link)

[ Suzaku is... a little blindsided by the announcement, but not completely, either. Not after the conversation they had after the twenty-years-in-the-future stint. There had been no Defense Force for her...

Still. He will consider the situation. On the one hand... he is not sure that, other than individual assistance and information bounces, the Defense Force has done too much, as a group, since he has showed up. (But maybe his standards are very high, when it comes to organizations.) On the other hand... it gives structure and an institution, for both those within and without it, when things got complicated.

It is... It is a good question that Kitty is asking.

But, while he considers, he can do something more specific. I don't think leading a team is what I should be doing right now, she said, and he waits a little before coming over to her. ]

Are you okay? [ Just. Quiet. ]

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kitty_has_claws
2017-03-20 01:42 am UTC (link)

[She is sorry for the blindsiding. It's hard to avoid it. Honestly, she kind of blindsided herself when she realized what she was thinking. It's been such a big part of her life for most of her time in the prison whether it was under Gino, the other Suzaku, or her own leadership.]

You're worried about me right now? [Why are you so sweet, Suzaku?] I am at my most selfish, and I think it might actually be a good thing.

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whiteknightmare
2017-03-20 12:45 pm UTC (link)

[ Because he's a pro at self-castigation while doing what needs to be done and can see the signs from a mile away?

Besides, he has worked long enough with her to know that she wouldn't get anywhere near to abandoning anything she has committed so much to unless she had a pretty bad jar to make her reconsider. ]

And 'selfish' is not what I have known you to be, let alone if things are going... as normally as this place allows.

[ A beat, and then, more gently, ] I can understand why the structure may seem... unnecessary, at this point. There hasn't been much that requires organized defense recently. But you said that you shouldn't be leading a team right now, and... I doubt you would have said it like that without cause to worry about you.

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kitty_has_claws
2017-03-20 10:49 pm UTC (link)

[Good point. Expert in the house.

She looks at him and gives a soft smile.]

You know, once upon time—a time you don't remember—when you were my boss, I came to you and told you I was in a relationship with someone on our watchlist. I wanted you to know so it was out in the open and you could send me packing if you wanted. And you didn't. You were understanding and thoughtful. Some things don't change I guess.

[But she hasn't answered the question and that wasn't her brilliant plan to distract him out of it. She just has to gather her thoughts.]

I'm dead back home. And it never mattered before. I mean, it mattered, but not to my dedication. I'm still not sure that it does. But the longer I'm here the less the mission is all important. The more I want to use some of the second chance for me. To see if I can fit some happiness in. I don't think the Force had to interfere with that, but maybe the mission of getting us home should fall to someone who...actually wants to go home.

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readystopwatch
2017-03-19 05:39 pm UTC (link)

[Between Jack and Kitty - not to mention being so involved in the Force - Ianto already knew what this meeting was about before it began. He has mixed feelings on it all of he's honest. It's been something he's been a part of since he's first day here and he likes to think for all it's problems the Defense Force has done a lot of good in this place. But he can see the other side of it as well, particularly thanks to Spike. He can understand why she wants to step down even if he'll miss it. It always reminded him of Torchwood, and of home and it's a bit sad to have that gone. He smiles a little wistfully as he approaches her.]

Feels like the end of an era, doesn't it?

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	kitty_has_claws 2017-03-20 01:43 am UTC (link)
	I'm not sure an era can be a year or less. [She can't remember exactly when Gino started it all. It was a little while after she arrived so probably less than a year.] ...But yeah. It does. It may be running again by tomorrow. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	readystopwatch 2017-03-20 07:28 am UTC (link)
	Have you had anyone express interest in taking it over? [He was a little surprised at first Jack hadn't wanted to, but it makes sense the more he thinks about it. Jack headed up Torchwood for very personal reasons, and he walked away from that leadership at home once it was gone. This place is no different.] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2017-03-20 10:40 pm UTC (link)
	No, but I haven't really asked. I did tell a few people before this like you and Ton and Chekov, but I wasn't really expecting any of you to want it. My only real guess is Suzaku and that's only because he used to. Not that he remembers it. I think even if someone does I'll walk away for awhile. Maybe rejoin later if I'm wanted. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	readystopwatch 2017-03-21 03:29 pm UTC (link)
	It's not a bad thing to take a break from it all. And for the record, I think you've done a good job running this thing. No one else has even trusted me with a leadership position like this. It meant quite a lot to me. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	kitty_has_claws 2017-03-21 09:51 pm UTC (link)
	Thank you. [Genuine.] [But she has to tease a little too.] I like that your measurement for success is that I trust you. [She smiles.] You did a great job, Ianto. You were exactly what the team needed. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	readystopwatch 2017-03-22 09:48 am UTC (link)
	Believe me, I am well aware of how pathetic it sounds. [He returns the smile.] I'll admit that I'm going to miss it but maybe it's for the best. I've used this as a substitute for Torchwood but it might be time I stepped away from all that and tried something new. What are you going to do with yourself now? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	wraith_7 2017-03-20 07:31 am UTC (link)
	Follow your dreams and all that. Even if they're stupid dreams. [The pottery, not the stepping down. He gets why she's doing that.] Come on, we should go celebrate. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)