InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Hello, Clarence"

Tear Grants (mysterymelody) wrote in marinanova,
@ 2013-09-18 18:35:00

Entry tags:

:mingle, annabelle, buffy summers, hei, hikaru hitachiin, kitty pryde (aoa), matt donovan, sougo okita, spencer reid, tear grants, toul, yuuki kuran

[Day 237] Fear of Abandonment Therapy mingle
[The call to those placed in abandonment therapy simply says to head to the Sector 5 prayer facility, and that's all-- not even that this has to do with those insecure feelings of yours. Posted arrows point the way down to the meditation room that has been filled up with several tables, two completely lined with coffees, teas, and bite sized refreshments ranging from cookies and pastries to sliced fruit and veggies. Plates and napkins are stacked up, and if you want a fork, they're there too.

The third table is larger and round, for that feeling of closeness, with chairs set up and for each seat a set of papers is waiting neatly on the table surface along with a pen. Topmost is a questionnaire with instructions to put detailed responses, be honest, and discuss with another attendee, with questions such as:

Do you get anxious if you cannot see or speak to someone close to you at any given moment?
Are you constantly haunted by the idea that someone may eventually leave you?
Do you put up with negative or even abusive behavior from someone just to keep from being alone?
Did someone important to you exit your life when you were young? How did you feel?
What exactly are you afraid of, beyond the indistinct label of "being abandoned"?

The second is a page with the heading "Make a list of all the people in your life, and determine how devastated you would be if those people left and why. Try to cut the unhealthy relationships, and distance a bit from even the good to build your independence!" and a few extra blank sheets of paper in case the one isn't enough.

Small cards are also scattered in the center of the table, printed with positive tips to help the process of healing.

"Often when people are abandoned (whether because someone leaves or even dies), they feel utterly hopeless and helpless. But you are never helpless.

Nothing lasts forever, so enjoy where you're at and whom you're with.

Abandonment issues aren't always easy to recognize, but can be worked through in a loving relationship.

Try to challenge yourself to be alone for extended periods of time without giving into the urge to reach out immediately and connect to someone."

[[ooc: mingle! you know how it goes by now, use these examples or come up with better ones if you want!]]

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onelevelmeaner
2013-09-18 08:58 pm UTC (link)

[This is definitely a group he belonged to. Not even he could deny that. However there was one question that was on his mind.]

Is it really so bad to have this sort of fear? I understand that my situation is different than most, being that I grew up with a twin brother and being without him is the worst thing, but isn't it normal to have this fear when you have someone you care about?

[He scratches his head.]

I guess this why I belong here, because I don't think this is something that will ever go away.

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bottomless_pit
2013-09-18 11:59 pm UTC (link)

[ Hei may be further along the recovery process then most but it does strike home and he found himself nodding along to Hikaru's words. ]

Yes, it doesn't ever go away, but our fear drives us to do things normal men might not. [ he smiled wanly, staring at the questions on the table. ] With some, it becomes an obsession.

[ people could do anything after all, to protect those they "love." He's seen it time and time again. ]

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	onelevelmeaner 2013-09-19 12:13 am UTC (link)
	[An obsession. Perhaps he was right. No, he was definitely right. What the Hitachiin had could only be explained as obsessions -- to an extent.] I can see that. I'd like to think that, in a case like mine, having an obsession is justified, since I've been without my brother a long time now. I suppose I can make excuses out of anything to justify my feelings. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	bottomless_pit 2013-09-19 12:34 am UTC (link)
	[ Hei nodded quietly in agreement ] Then should I hope he doesn't return? [ he asked it quietly because he knows that losing something once lost a second time can be almost worse then the first. But... sometimes, you can actually say goodbye. ] (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	onelevelmeaner 2013-09-19 08:12 pm UTC (link)
	I don't know. I never quite know. I ask myself that very question all the time. He's my twin brother, my entire life, and my best friend. I do want to see him, but I don't want... [He tries to think of the most appropriate word] I suppose I don't want to deal with the consequences and the hardship of losing him again, if it were to come to that... again. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

bottomless_pit
2013-09-24 11:31 pm UTC (link)

[ Hei knew that feeling; he had felt it every day since he knew such meetings were possible, here. To meet, but not to meet... how much longer could he guarantee he'd stay here on his own? He had no answers. ]

It's the wardens fault for toying with us. Perhaps one day, they'll stop playing and then you can reunite.

... Or go home. [ it was faint hope, but he could wish it for others now. For himself, he no longer cared. ]

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	onelevelmeaner 2013-09-24 11:50 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah. That's what I'm hoping for, too. It would be too cruel otherwise, and I'd like to think the wardens aren't that cruel... (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	bottomless_pit 2013-09-24 11:54 pm UTC (link)
	[ Hei flashed a twisted smile, not having any of that hope left. ] They have to feel, first, before they can learn what cruelty they've done. But Sentience [ by all accounts ] managed to learn. Perhaps these will learn as well. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	onelevelmeaner 2013-09-25 12:00 am UTC (link)
	[Sentience, huh? He remembered Sentience, but that wasn't the kind of stuff he ever paid attention to.] I never noticed, but I'm always oblivious about that sort of thing. If it's true, however, then perhaps it's only a matter of time... especially after holding many of these therapy sessions. They've got to get a clue eventually. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	doesntdamsel 2013-09-21 12:41 pm UTC (link)
	[ She shrugs. It is what it is. Besides, she hopes ot be changing the trend with Sam. ] Maybe. I haven't decided whether this is actually helpful or just torture yet. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)