In These Stones Horizons Sing

You know if I'm going to keep getting beamed to uncomfortable places, I'm going to insist we get some kind of compensation in the form of gorgeous ladies. And handjobs

Well at least I didn't get stuck in the pipes again. That was a bit too much like getting a swirly if you ask me.

I ain't never seen a place where it rains so much 'fore in my life. I wanna go out and play but it just keeps on rainin' an' rainin' an' rainin'. Seems like ever since I got well all it does is rain.

Don't it ever stop? Even for a teeny tiny little bit? There're parks to play in an' I ain't gone down a slide or swung in a swing for almost a year now.

( Private to Captain James T. Kirk )

I've been brought through a rift in space and time and picked up by the ghostbusters. And people call me crazy.

And, more importantly, my money is not in my account. Why isn't my money in my account? That was my money. I like my money. It's mine. I'm very unsettled. In an angry way.

[Filtered from kiddies eyes]

Hey Bonesy, baby.. you ever want to do that little thing you did to me with your tongue again? You can do that anytime you want. Hell, I'd do that shit in public.

Though next time, you can buy the coffee in the morning.

Well at least this shit's better than being stuck in bumfuck nowhere.

If I see any little green things with three eyes though, they're getting slayed.

Fuck that nonsense.

I am getting really sick of rifts in time and space. And I am less amused by people who treat this like it's an everyday occurrence. If you're so used to picking people up, you should be able to send them back.

I demand to be returned to my own time stream immediately! I was in the middle of something very important.

{the following is being uploaded onto the computer via voice recognition software; this explains the words being slightly misspelled as the programing types as close to the user's speech pattern as possible}

The folks I talked to when I showed up said that this ain't home and Georgia's a long ways away besides. I don't think I like that too much and I don't know what to do when I start feelin' really bad again if I don't have my medicine and I know my family won't.

What's a place like this want with a kid like me anyhow? It just don't make sense.

This is ridiculous. I'm a goddamn doctor!

Since my esteemed captain can't be bothered with pleasantries, you're going to have to settle for me. I'm Dr. Leonard H. McCoy. Just call me Bones. The other fellow is Captain James T. Kirk. Just call him an idiot.

I need a drink.

Nothing ever goes the way it's supposed to, does it? You become the youngest person in history to get your own ship and this happens.

Figures.