InsaneJournal

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Turgon the Wise | Sarafinwë Turukáno (turukano) wrote in compass_network,
@ 2013-05-16 12:30:00

Entry tags:

!open, ~micha delmare

I am finding the differences between the treatment of men and women far more disturbing than I ever thought they would be. When I was a woman, I think that I was too used to the way I was treated to see clearly how internalized such things could be, and how deeply such things persist in our society.

So following from that thought, I should like to ask some questions. I think perhaps just one at a time, since there is much to think about and discuss about each.

So, to begin.

Would you consider a woman who works, of her own free will and with no pressure or compulsion, in a strip club to be equally respectable to, say, a teacher or a waitress? Please explain your answer either way.

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fuckitybye
2013-05-16 04:55 pm UTC (link)

Yes. Equality and respect is not something that should have to be earned through making choices that society finds acceptable. I don't understand why we (as a society) shame women for working in a strip club, when clearly the reason that they are working there is purely demand and supply. That is to say, if there wasn't money to be made doing it, they wouldn't be in business. The men who judge women for working as strippers are usually only too happy to pay for the service. It's hypocritical.

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turukano
2013-05-16 05:07 pm UTC (link)

First, thank you for your words, and for your wisdom.

I agree with you, I do not understand why women's choices must be condemned as immoral the moment they challenge society's idea of what a woman should be. Who is to say what a woman should be if it is not that woman herself? And who is to say that a woman may not even enjoy expressing her sexuality in such a way?

Who is to say?

And yet it seems when a woman shows interest in sex, or confidence in her body, that she has overstepped some invisible line that strips her of her respectability.

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	fuckitybye 2013-05-16 05:12 pm UTC (link)
	~~This makes me wish Grey was still~~ The reason is that sex is power, and a lot of men find it intimidating to see a woman with power. It's all about control, and it shouldn't be that way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	turukano 2013-05-16 05:15 pm UTC (link)
	Indeed so, and a power that is oft cruelly expressed through violence. My world is far from perfect in this regard, but I think it was not until I looked at the world as a man that I have realized how entrenched such power structures are. The way I am treated, the respect I am given, simply for a difference in anatomy is astounding. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	fuckitybye 2013-05-16 06:23 pm UTC (link)
	Definitely, and even then the woman is often blamed, despite being the innocent victim. It seems like it's one thing that all of the worlds here have in common, which is really fucking depressing. I know. It's a fucking joke. I'm sorry that it is that way. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

turukano
2013-05-16 06:30 pm UTC (link)

As am I. As the mother of a daughter, it pains me to see such things internalized in such a way. I do not want her chances limited at all by her gender; they should not be!

And of course, such things as domestic abuse and sexual assault are the most obvious manifestations of this attitude, but the others are creeping and insidious. Such as teaching a woman to believe she is less, or that her body is not hers to do with as she pleases! Or that enjoying sex somehow makes her a 'bad' woman.

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fuckitybye
2013-05-16 10:53 pm UTC (link)

I know what you mean. I've got two daughters of my own. Neither of them here, don't know if that's a blessing or not. Doesn't always feel like it.

I always tried to instill a sense of self-confidence in them. To know that their voices mattered as much as anyone elses. You're right, I think often the emotional abuse is the word. Slowly beating someone down day after day just because of their gender.

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	turukano 2013-05-16 11:56 pm UTC (link)
	And sometimes, it is so subtle that it is not even noticed, even by the women themselves. That is what makes it so dangerous. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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