InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "It’s him! Our teen stalker!"

Brynhild Ingouf (brynhild_ingouf) wrote in compass_network,
@ 2020-05-29 15:24:00

Entry tags:

!open, brynhild, dan foster, edward kenway, jacob frye, johnn redel, kelan, miguel o'hara, thor, zatanna

Filtered away from Astrid and Brenna
I have an odd request: Many humans offered their blood to me last time and the response brought me to tears. Are there any nonhumans that would offer the same?

Here is why I ask: A friend brought up the idea that I do not have to outlive everyone, that my 'immortality' could go away, for the lack of better words. Another seems to think this may end my life, but brought up a loop hole when I told him of the way I know of to remove my vampirism, to stave off of human blood. And I hope my self-loathing will be enough to open a door close to the time before I killed my Master so that I might do it again.

The reason I need to feed, and can't just go without blood all together, is I will lose selfcontrol. I will be come a ravenous beast, and that is not something I ever want to be, let alone on a floating island.

For those of you that are finding out about my vampirism this way, I am sorry. I did intend to be more delicate with it but opportunity did not present itself.

I am tired of being repulsive. I'm tired of outliving everyone I love, but I am not ready for an unnatural death.

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	brynhild_ingouf 2020-05-30 09:56 pm UTC (link)
	My thoughts exactly. But... technically I am not living. My heart does not have a normal heart rhythm, if I feed on normal humans. And I don't have to breathe. It is likely that vampires don't exist in your world beyond literature. And that literature might not exist in your time. But I know it exists because Jacob knew what I was. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-05-31 11:52 am UTC (link)
	Had I been in my own world I might have found this news stranger. Still I am not sure what to think or feel... (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-05-31 08:05 pm UTC (link)
	It is natural to feel repulsed, or disgusted, I get it a lot, and I understand it. So if that is what you feel, I will not hold it against you. Don't hold it against Jacob for not telling you, I made him promise not to, because I wanted to. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-05-31 09:40 pm UTC (link)
	Confused is more accurate. He knew? And what did he say when he found out? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-05-31 11:41 pm UTC (link)
	Is there anyway that I can help alleviate some confusion? Made me promise not to drain you, and offered his neck. I didn't take him up on his offer, but I will keep the promise. Then we distracted one another with sharp and pointy objects. And filthy novels. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-01 09:13 am UTC (link)
	If you are technically not alive, then how are we able to communicate? How are you able to speak and act as a living being? Should the dead not be left alone in peace? He did? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

brynhild_ingouf
2020-06-01 09:27 am UTC (link)

Most are left in peace, they go on to where they're supposed to move on to. But there are exceptions. My Master found me before I was completely gone, made me an offer that I couldn't refuse, because of what our Seer had said to me, and I didn't have the knowledge then that I do now. He drained me of what blood I had left, and fed me his. There are more steps, but they aren't important, what feeding me his blood meant that I was alive but not alive, dead but not dead. Does that clear anything up? Or does it make you more confused?

Yes. He was quite concerned that is what I had in mind. But I am old, very old so if I had tasting you in mind erm, I don't take much. And I definitely don't without permission. Mostly. From everyone here.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-01 10:03 am UTC (link)
	So do you wish to live again? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-01 11:09 am UTC (link)
	Simply put, yes. There is a longer answer but, it is complicated. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-01 11:23 am UTC (link)
	Then if I am able to help, let me know. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

brynhild_ingouf
2020-06-01 11:44 am UTC (link)

I will need a distraction, every now and then. Because I have to seep myself in my own self loathing, wallow in it, with hopes that that will encourage the door I need to open. Jacob has suggested a less sober distraction. I suggested taking advantage of the copper baths in my club, some old Scotch that needs drink, and some good Cuban cigars. How about you join us?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-01 03:38 pm UTC (link)
	I would gladly join you both. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-01 08:35 pm UTC (link)
	Then help me with a subject, Jacob and I will be reading filthy novels, he suggested something Welsh. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-01 08:57 pm UTC (link)
	Did he? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-01 10:44 pm UTC (link)
	He did. And I actually have something about a welsh farmer and a time traveler. It's not so much a bodice ripper like he and I are reading, but it is delightfully filthy. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-02 10:29 am UTC (link)
	What is a bodice ripper? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-02 10:37 am UTC (link)
	It's a very filthy romance novel with a historical setting. That really sets itself around the sex rather than story. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-02 11:49 am UTC (link)
	Why would I spend time reading about it when I could seek out a lover to share my bed with? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-02 08:05 pm UTC (link)
	Because sometimes the lovers are not available, and if you've got imagination they paint delightful pictures. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-03 01:28 pm UTC (link)
	I will try to keep an open mind. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-04 03:23 am UTC (link)
	Does that mean the welsh farmer and time traveler sounds good? If not I have something... else in mind. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-04 12:10 pm UTC (link)
	You have something else in mind? And what would that be? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-04 08:14 pm UTC (link)
	It's more of the supernatural variety, set closer to this year, a male vampire finds himself enamored by a werewolf's human mate. And the werewolf finds himself attracted to the vampire almost as much as he is his mate. The human is a female. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	captainkenway 2020-06-04 08:58 pm UTC (link)
	That sounds interesting. And you will share this story with me? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	brynhild_ingouf 2020-06-05 04:12 am UTC (link)
	Yes I will, if you like it I'll even let you keep it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

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captainkenway, 2020-06-05 03:23 pm UTC

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