Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "You gonna eat that nose?"

Joss Salvage || Badr al-Budur (sultana) wrote in bellumlogs,
@ 2010-06-28 22:56:00

Entry tags:

scheherazade, sultan's daughter

Who: Sherri and Joss
What: Breakdowns, Epiphanies, and Catching Up
Where: 205
When: Directly after this
Warnings: Umm, whining, crying, swearing, mentions of mature themes, and all that fun stuff.

Joss let Sherri lead her out of the lobby, past the other residents and the crazed paramedics. They seemed to move in a blur around her and though she vaguely realized she wasn't the only one crying and screaming, she couldn't spend much thought on them. She never could - she had always been the most important thing in her mind and even with the pained realization that this had fucked things up before, she couldn't get over it.

She sniffled as they moved up the stairs, a word or two slipping out every now and then - "I'm sorry-" - "Idiot-" - "Screw-up-" - "Vase-" - "Dead-" but most of her mumbling at this point was incoherent. By the time they got in 205, she was no less of a wreck but at least she wasn't screaming - just shaking badly as she slumped on Sherri's floor, not even bothering with moving a few feet beyond the door.

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

sultana
2010-06-29 02:14 pm UTC (link)

Joss shivered and nodded. It was a lie, but she usually didn’t care about if she lied or not. “His blood’s gone,” she said, pulling the towel more tightly around her. She shivered for a moment more, before finishing toweling herself off. She looked up afterwards, leaving the towel on the floor – carelessness and slobby tendencies weren’t going to vanish – and tried to put her chin up.

“I’m an idiot,” she declared.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-06-29 06:36 pm UTC (link)

"You're not..." Well. Sherri sighed and shoved the clothes at her. "You've done some silly things, but I don't think you've ever done anything that would make me call you an idiot." There were a few times she might have thought it, but Sherri really didn't think it was the best time to mention that. "Get dressed and we can sit on the futon and talk about it, okay?" Hopefully, clean and in fresh clothes, Joss would be able to think about it a little more calmly. Maybe.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-06-29 06:44 pm UTC (link)

Joss changed into the clothes without saying anything else, chin that was jutting out a moment prior shaking. She was fairly certain of her own intelligence - always had been. But she'd acted like an idiot and that was obvious in her own mind. Her eyes were hot by the time she was dressed and she went to the futon, flopping on it with her head against the back. Her knees went up to her chin, waiting for the signal from Sherri to explain.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-06-29 07:24 pm UTC (link)

Sherri puttered around in the kitchen for a moment, putting water in her coffee maker to heat it up for hot cocoa the lazy way before sitting down beside Joss. She was tired and, for the first time ever, actually felt like she was closer to thirty than twenty. With only the sound of the dripping water for background noise, she turned to her sister. "Tell me what happened?"

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-06-29 08:28 pm UTC (link)

Joss remained where she was on the futon, eyes following Sherri as she moved around. Once she sat down, she shifted slightly the change in weight on the furniture disturbing her.

She waited till she was settled, before starting. Joss was no story-teller, unlike her sister and didn’t have any illusions of being one. In a flat voice, that normally would have relished in spilling details, she explained. “We were in like, Chicago. That time when no one can drink anything? There was this raid on a bar we were in and some of us ran out the front door. We got arrested-” She grimaced at that. “I hate jail, it was even worse in nineteen-whatever.”

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-06-30 03:07 am UTC (link)

First thing was first, and Sherri could ask about when else Joss had been in jail later. She wrapped an arm around Joss's shoulders, hoping that would be comforting enough to persuade her to continue. "How did you get out?" Half of her expected Scheherazade to still be in the back of her mind demanding details. The lack of her was almost surprising, in spite of how long Sherri had lived without her.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-06-30 03:30 am UTC (link)

"The men broke us out," she said, leaning into Sherri a little. "They had us seperated and - um, there were two wolves and a guy who pretended to have a heart attack." At least she thought so. She hadn't paid much attention to them, as they'd made their plans. "Then a boy turned invisible ...and we ran."

She shivered slightly. "I got picked up by this group, which was cool and all. I was a gopher of sorts, until this couple grabbed me a little later. It was so strange, but they thought I was their daughter."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-06-30 03:35 am UTC (link)

Sherri tried not to smile at the emphasis on the word 'daughter.' "Were they really horrible parents for however long you were with them?" Sherri knew they could have been, but somehow she doubted it. The rest of the story... well, it sounded impossible, but then again what about the last week had been?

Without really giving it much though, she squeezed Joss a little and leaned back, the side of her head pressed against Joss's. As long as her little sister was where she could touch her, nothing really seemed bad compared to the worry, even though she knew Joss might disagree.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-06-30 03:42 am UTC (link)

In any other mindset, Joss would have sniffed and said of course they were - the only ones worse were their own. But Joss paused, actually giving it thought before letting her head flop back. "No. They seemed really worried about it all - they had another girl too, this redhead who I didn't really talk to..." She trailed off, throat tight.

She moved a little closer to Sherri, shutting her eyes. Saying it was important, really saying it - not lying or embellishing. "I left, because they were freaking me out. We were at this hotel? And it was Valentine's day and the whole place was done up in this sick heart and pink scheme-" Though she emphasized the sick, her nose only wrinkled slightly. Habit, versus anything else though the place had been horrific. "I bounced around, just watching and keeping away from the couple - Badr kept talking to me and whining-" With good reason, she realized. She took another deep breath, before saying in a rush, "Then this guy pulled me to the dance floor."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	withinastory 2010-06-30 11:17 pm UTC (link)
	Sherri had a feeling that the guy in question was the one whose blood Joss had been covered in. She turned a tiny bit to look at Joss directly, her full attention on her sister. Since speaking might derail Joss onto some other detail, she kept her mouth shut and let her expression speak of her concern, instead. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-07-01 02:49 am UTC (link)

Joss realized, with a sinking feeling that she wasn’t going to get more prompting then that. She swallowed again, her hands wringing together in her lap. They suddenly felt dirty, despite how much she’d scrubbed them in the water before. “We danced,” she said again. “And then there were these police lights. They had to be after me.” Not the others. It still was about her – the police had been after her and this was her fault.

“He saw the lights and I distracted him. We moved to a corner and you know, it was nice for once. He was gentle about it-” Or was it her memory making it better than it was? Her eyes grew hot as she shook her head. “Badr and I both liked him, a bit more than the usuals. He was actually paying attention, he was kinda nice for a guy on a dance floor-”

There was a long pause before she forced herself to continue. “The police came in and it was chaos – shouting and screaming and fighting. They started firing and there were gunshots. And – and he fell on me, just as the first ones went off-” Her voice hitched as she began to cry again. “And it was horrible. The whole thing – it was so, so horrible. It wasn’t exciting or fun, or great – it was fucking horrible.”

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-07-01 03:03 am UTC (link)

"Oh, baby..." Sherri tugged Joss's face down against her shoulder again, wishing to God that she knew how to make this one better. She could tell Joss that the police might not have been after her at all, that it might have been some sort of raid and they had no idea, but that wouldn't change anything. She could tell the truth, that the boy might have gotten shot anyway, but that didn't mean anything when she couldn't prove it for sure. Most of all, nothing she said or did would change the fact that Joss had been trapped under someone as he died, so she didn't even try.

Instead, she just rocked with her, gently, and hopefully soothingly. "It's not your fault. It's not."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-07-01 03:11 am UTC (link)

Joss let herself be tugged down, crying into Sherri's shoulder. Her thoughts were going a mile a minute again and she couldn't keep up. Usually things were simple - do this or that to get noticed and push the limits. She didn't like thinking of the consequences and avoided it.

"It was," she mumbled into her shoulder. She pulled back, looking up. "And everything else too. I've been stupid. For years." She sniffled. "Forever."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-07-01 03:18 am UTC (link)

"You've never meant any harm." Sherri hugged her tighter. "I know you would never hurt anybody, Joss, it's not your fault. It was the people who were pulling the triggers that are responsible for it, not you." Sighing, she acknowledged, "You're a little spoiled, sure, but you're not to blame for that, either. If anything, that's my fault."

She tried to think of anything else she could say, anything to make Joss feel better since what had happened couldn't be her fault, not really. "It wasn't you."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-07-01 03:33 am UTC (link)

Joss squeezed back, not sure if she believed entirely in what Sherri said or not. She still felt like shit, still felt like she fucked everything up under the sun, and still felt like she had been a moron. A tiny voice in the back of her head, sounding suspiciously like Badr - but probably was her concious, suggested change, but Joss couldn't think of that. She took another big, shaky breath before saying in a rush, "Can I stay here tonight? Please?"

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-07-01 03:38 am UTC (link)

If Joss hadn't asked, Sherri would have insisted. "Of course you can. I'll finish making the hot chocolate, we'll both get a good night's rest, and you'll feel better in the morning. I promise." Of course, if Joss wanted to change her ways just a little, Sherri wasn't going to object. She really didn't want to go prematurely gray, and at least knowing that Joss was out of trouble would help a little with keeping that from happening.

She disentangled herself from Joss, standing to go mix up the cocoa. She smiled at her as she did so, hoping to distract her at least a little. "I'll even tell you a bedtime story, if you'd like me to."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

sultana
2010-07-01 03:43 am UTC (link)

Moving back as Sherri got up, Joss let her head thunk against the couch's back once more. She wasn't sure again, if she believed Sherri on feeling better in the morning - but it was a nice thought. She rubbed at her eyes with the heel of her hand, sniffling once more to compose herself.

"Only if you want to," she said. There was a pause. "Yours?" She didn't know enough about She-hera-what's-it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

withinastory
2010-07-01 03:50 am UTC (link)

"Of course." Sherri finished mixing up the cocoa quickly, then shooed Joss out of the way long enough to pull her futon into bed form. When she'd gotten them both settled with their mugs in hand, she began.

"A long time ago, there was a mighty king in the lands of India and China, and when he died he left only two sons..."

She knew that she couldn't fix everything for Joss with chocolate and bedtime stories (and she was going to make sure to edit the scenes about the killing of the wives very thoroughly), but at the moment it was all she could offer. Hopefully, it would at least be enough to hold her together one more night.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

(Read comments) -