Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "a hickey the size of FRANCE!"

Samuel Madin (tiger_says_rawr) wrote in bellumlogs,
@ 2010-06-20 08:35:00

Entry tags:

plot: tempus, plot: xi, shere khan, wicked witch

Who: Sam and Joanie.
What: Tending to horses. Neeeeigh?
Where: The palace stables.
When: Post-hunkering down and sleeping in a barn, post-pulling a Doc Brown and traveling back in time.
Warnings: ~~A stable is not very conducive to sexing, so probably none.~~ Bambi dies. Animal activists, proceed with caution.
Notes: Heeeeeey. So like, I am totally going to assume that either Joanie turned hay into clothes or they were all thrown time-appropriate clothes when dragged off to their respective whatever's. Yes, this is Kim and I have such a way with words. ETA: It was all Joanie. She Harry Twattered the barn group some clothes with whatever magic word it was. Hurjashfutuanfjh!

You knew things were bad when the question was not where are we, but when are we. Judging by the clothing of the protesting Russians and the police that came to break up the scuffle, it had to be early 1900s. Everyone kept yelling about Nicholas - that was one of the few things that made sense - and while the cold was pretty severe, it wasn't as bad as it could have been, as in if they had been caught in the dead of winter.

Though of course our intrepid explorers could not go unnoticed for long. At least they managed to sneak in a few hours of sleep before the next round of fuckery set in. Sam had no idea how he managed to get dragged off to a stable (a stable? Really? What the hell? Did he give off cowboy vibes or some such?) but the stable hand looked pretty serious business about lathering down those horses. Apparently, he was in a rush to get them prepped for important things and didn't care that his newest stable attendants did not speak a lick of Russian.

This would be interesting.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-20 09:50 pm UTC (link)

At his questions, she scowled. "I can make knives," she said stubbornly, bristling slightly. "We got here with the clothes we were wearing at midnight. I don't wear knives to bed, don't be retarded." Rolling her eyes, she stepped away from the horse.

"I don't know. What else can we do? Unless..." She paused, eyes widening in mock revelation. "We just finish cleaning these horses." She hated the work, but she'd rather be miserable for a short while then leave than end up dead or on fire.

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	tiger_says_rawr 2010-06-20 09:59 pm UTC (link)
	"Oh really?" Sam flashed his signature crooked, leering sort of grin. "Is that an invitation to find out what you wear to bed?" Then he made an executive decision. "Fuck the horses, to quote you. What do you need to make clothes?" He motioned down. "My pants? I'll take them off." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

wickedwicker
2010-06-20 10:11 pm UTC (link)

At his question, she stared at him blankly. Was he really doing this right now? She wasn't sure if she was blushing from embarrassment or irritation, though it didn't matter - her face was red regardless. "That would almost work, except you saw what I wore to bed last night." She raised a brow imperiously, flashing him an "I win" smirk.

She moved towards a nearby bale of hay when he asked about removing his pants. Once again, she stared at him. "I don't understand why you keep him around, dearie," the Witch drawled.

"He's not an idiot," she replied stubbornly. "He just acts like one at times."

"The fact that he chooses to act like an idiot is not a point in his favor."

"Keep those on," she commanded, glaring at him. "It's cold here. I think you'd just embarrass yourself." Inspecting a bale of hay, she frowned slightly. "This can do. Though if you're committed to recycling, I could change what we're currently wearing." In theory.

"Don't doubt yourself, child."

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-20 10:16 pm UTC (link)

"We're in a time warp. Who knows what's real and what's not. And if you wear the exact same thing to bed every night, well..." Sam backed up a bit, to let Joanie do her thing. "It was a joke! Chill...ma'am." He figured the Witch took issue with him. Shere Khan wasn't laughing either. "The recycling was actually what I had in mind. Clothes to clothes might tire you out less maybe?"

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wickedwicker
2010-06-20 10:33 pm UTC (link)

She pursed her lips. "Don't ma'am me," she hissed. Dragging a hand over face, she took a deep breath. "Right. It's...it's not that different really. I mean, yeah, it is a little, but..." She shook her head. "It's hard to explain."

"Stop stalling. Go to work." Joanie would have argued with her if she weren't right.

"Okay." She stepped up to Sam, resting her hands on his shoulders. She figured now wouldn't be the time to mention that she'd never transformed something while it was in contact with another person before. Hopefully he wouldn't end up a tie. "Just stand still. Alright?" After shooting him a very serious look, she forced herself to relax.

The stables faded from her mind, the smells of the horses and the noise of other stable hands outside all disappearing as she closed her eyes. Her palms flattened against his shoulders, moving slowly downwards as she began to murmur a stream of words and sounds that consumed her. A faint glow emitted from her fingertips, transferring to the shirt and jacket Sam wore. It began as a simple peasant's frock, but the more she spoke, the more and more dignified they both appeared. The glow traveled down as her fingers reached his waist, brushing the waistband of his slacks. They, too, began to change, adopting a straight hem and slick silhouette.

Finally, Joanie pulled back, taking a deep breath and opening her eyes to see Sam in a cleaner, more stately jacket. It was thick and long, reaching down to his knees and buttoned up to his chin. Unlike his previous jacket, which had been a bit lopsided and slipshod - she had been so tired when she made it - this one was almost impressive. Wiping a few beads of sweat from her temples, she sighed. "Alright. Do you think that'll be okay?"

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-20 10:57 pm UTC (link)

If Sam wasn't so busy being in shock and awe at what was going on, he might have thought that was somewhat erotic. But the first was on his mind, along with holy shit holy SHIT!! and other random synapses firing. Her skills were quite impressive, that was for sure.

"Yeah, I think it'll be okay." Understatement - he sounded surprised that Joanie even asked otherwise. "More than okay." He put his hands on her waist, leaning in and nuzzling her temple. It was a comforting gesture that had Shere Khan scowling. "How about you, are you okay?"

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wickedwicker
2010-06-20 11:13 pm UTC (link)

Though she knew that what she had done was good - after all, she had altered his clothing while it was on his body, and done so well - Joanie felt a wave of pride as he affirmed that. Why wouldn't she? Somebody else had agreed that something she did was good. It was a childish, ridiculous feeling that made the Witch sigh tersely. Joanie didn't care.

As he settled his hands on her waist, she tensed, pulling an arm up to hold between them as he nuzzled her temple. It was a defensive gesture, an automatic thing that she barely controlled. "Good," she said with a fragile smile, patting one of his hands awkwardly.

"Don't lose focus!" the Witch snapped, causing her to pull back abruptly.

"Right, right," she muttered out loud, shaking her head. "Focus." She took a deep breath, crossing her arms over her chest to rest her palms on her own shoulders. Once again, she began a series of words that ignited the glow of her fingertips. As she smoothed her hands down her front, the material of her clothing shifted. It wasn't truly expensive by any means, but it appeared to be absolutely decadent. By the time her hands had reached down to her legs, she was dressed in a long, deep green dress with a high neck and matching warm jacket.

Wheezing with the effort both of these things had taken, she pressed a hand to her mouth, steadying herself for a moment. "Okay," she said, licking her dry lips as she looked up at him. "Do you think we should have hats? He might recognize our faces." Not to mention the fact that she would commit murder if he recognized them after all of this.

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-20 11:32 pm UTC (link)

Sam was normally a practical sort of person - he was good at getting things done because he wasn't bothered with feelings, but damn, that all looked like it had Joanie completely exhausted. He narrowed his eyes when she pulled back - obviously the witch was screaming at her.

"Probably, but if you make them then we'll get a lot of use out of them," he pointed out. "I don't really want to make eye contact with many pissed off Russians. Besides, it'll be easier to blend in with the full attire. Do you need a break first?"

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wickedwicker
2010-06-20 11:54 pm UTC (link)

As he agreed, she nodded. Just as she thought. "Okay. No problem." Yes, it was probably a good thing to not make unnecessary eye contact with these people. Especially if they were dressed nicely. Shit, what if their attire made them targets? Joanie touched her waist, realizing that she had inadvertently destroyed her knife. Great. At least it wasn't trapped beneath her dress, stuck to her skin.

The mention of a break made her shake her head. "No, I'm fine." And she was. She just needed to push through this. It was good practice, and moping about how tired she was wouldn't fix anything. Picking up a handful of hay, she closed her eyes, envisioning a sort of cap she had seen on the heads of many of the more nicely dressed men in the crowd. It materialized in her hands, a dark gray to match Sam's jacket. "Here you go," she said with a slight smile. She quickly fashioned a black hat with a wide brim and a frilly accent for herself. Twisting her hair up into a very makeshift updo, she hid its messy hideousness behind the hat, pulling it down at a slant to shield her eyes.

Before they left, she picked up one last handful of hay and held it in her palm. "Sakeen," she whispered. It instantly materialized into a folded switchblade that she tucked inside her jacket. Just in case. She turned her head to Sam, the hat drawing attention largely to the curl of a smile on her lips. "Are you ready?"

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 12:09 am UTC (link)

Oh, now she was making weapons? Handy skill to have, that. Sam preferred to use his bare hands and snap a neck or a hyoid bone, causing the victim to choke on his own saliva, but stabbing one to death did the job too. He pursed his lips in amusement, tipping his hat in a gentlemanly gesture. "Of course! We're out of here," he said, sounding confident. "Just keep your head down and don't make eye contact. We'll be fine." And walk quickly, with a purpose, but not too quickly! And don't get shot. Also a good plan.

The tiger was quiet for once as they exited the stable, and past the small tower and the random horse graves - the attempt was to blend in and then taper off without attracting attention, so no one would notice them heading toward the safety of the trees. It was cold, but nothing unbearable - the clothes helped with that, obviously. Besides, they'd have fire soon enough.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 12:18 am UTC (link)

At his instructions, she scoffed. "Yeah, I figured that." Had to have the last word, of course. She followed him briskly, doing her best to carry herself with some form of dignity. Of course, the Wicked Witch had plenty to say about that.

"Don't slouch. You're a witch, for goodness' sakes, look the part." Though such nagging aggravated a slight twitch of her left eyebrow, Joanie straightened up her back as they passed the stable hand that had given them so much trouble. She didn't look at him, but saw the friendly wave of his hand in her peripheral vision.

They finally reached the trees, the dark colors of their clothing blending in with the darkness of the tree trunks. Picking up her skirts in a way that would probably have made a proper lady weep, Joanie crunched clumsily through the snow, glancing over at Sam. "Okay, Master Hunter," she said, starting to wonder if this was really a good idea. "Now what?" She turned to face him, head canted to the side as she rested a hand on her hip. "I'll follow your lead." Yes, that was the "bitch better know what you're doing" pose that every woman had perfected naturally. And it meant that she expected Sam to have a plan.

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 12:39 am UTC (link)

Of course Joanie had to have the last word! Sam was like that too, but he bit his tongue, meaning to tell her that he OMGGGZZZ!111one! hated her sooooo much, but then decided to save it for another day when they reached the edge of the forest. "Yeah, yeah," he began, and then started taking off his clothes. "Don't give me any backtalk, lady. Just hold these. They're freshly made and if I rip them, I don't want you to have to make more." He might feel a twinge of guilt over that.

Let me out, you albino sloth, the tiger commanded, practically clawing and gnawing at Sam's brain.

I'm working on it, bitch! Sam snapped in response. "Okay, avert your eyes if you want to be surprised for later," he smirked, because he was only down to his pants now. "Just go and build a fire, somewhere, and I'll find you."

Shere Khan was past the point of impatient. He wanted to hunt, and he wanted to do it now. Human was his first choice, which sent a chill down Sam's spine, but no way was he bringing back a dead palace worker. They would have to compromise.

Let me OUT!!!!! the tiger roared, and the snarling was deafening. Sam was almost sure he lost his sense of hearing, stumbling back as he covered his ears.

Stoooo - he tried to plead with the tiger but it was too late. With another ferocious hiss, Shere Khan ripped free from the cage in Sam's mind. He yelled, but that turned into yet another irritated snarl that wasn't human. That was because he was shifting into something not human, and he felt like he was being ripped apart at the seams. It was a literal burst from the inside - never before had he felt so much pain.

Shere Khan dropped to all four legs, making a sound between a purr and a growl. His paws were soft on the ground and his muscles shifted under his skin, smoothly, in sophisticated tiger gait as he circled Joanie, sniffing her. His tail brushed up against her once. Then he turned and sped off into the forest, a flash of black and orange.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 06:09 am UTC (link)

Honestly, Joanie had expected some kind of cub scout mission wherein they set up clever little traps for the cute creatures of Shiny Eyes Forest to evade while learning about friendship and togetherness. When Sam began undressing, she covered her eyes with a slight huff. "What the hell are-" As he mentioned not wanting to rip them, she froze. No. No he couldn't be.

Her hand dropped and for a moment, she stared at him numbly, taking the clothing in her arms. She barely noticed his crack right before he removed his pants, adding them to the pile of clothing in her arms and looking away with a mixture of caution and confusion.

Though she wasn't exactly cold, Joanie could feel a light shiver running down her spine as she clutched the bundle of clothing to her chest for comfort. "Why are you so fearful, child?"

The sound of the transformation was enough to make her sick. Cracking bones and morphing muscle resonated through the forest, and Joanie had to bite down on her lower lip to keep from whimpering in sympathy pain. "He's a tiger!" she thought fearfully, standing stock still as the transformation neared its end. "They. Eat. People."

Just as she had finished that thought, she heard the sound of an enormous cat prowling towards her. She turned, eyes wide, and for a moment she wished she could recreate a Taser. The powerful creature walked with purpose and dignity, circling her in a way that made her stomach clench. It made her think of a shark circling its prey, and the way in which he was clearly sniffing her made her begin to play back a list of the stupid decisions she had made that lead up to this point.

The sensation of his tail skimming her leg made her tense, feeling a combination of shock and awe. She stared at him, wide-eyed, and watched him barrel off into the woods.

"Don't you feel silly now?"

Gritting her teeth, Joanie took a few weak steps forward. "Shut up," she snapped, taking off further into the forest to find a suitable place to build a fire that wouldn't be easily detected.

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 11:55 am UTC (link)

Sam was still 'there,' so to speak, but he was shoved away in the back of the tiger's head - the roles had been reversed, and Sam didn't like it at all.

Not so nice, isn't it? Shere Khan scolded the human. You and your zoo. I might never let you come back.

It was a threat, Sam knew that, because there was no way this tiger was going to take over for good. Groggily, he protested - squirming uncomfortably as Shere Khan bounded through the woods, stealth and quiet, senses alert as he hunted for his prey. Hibernation was a bother, but the deer were still out and about, looking for tasty moss to eat, and that would do.

Leave her alone, Sam cautioned the tiger, still twisting and turning and trying to find enough space for his own thoughts.

I had to get her scent, you ingrate. I am an excellent tracker, you know. And I didn't detect that she was ovulating, so you may want to wait before mounting her.

I DON'T WANT TO IMPREGNATE HER AT THIS MOMENT, THANK YOU! Sam screamed. God damn, he felt like a fucking mime in an invisible box. This was ridiculous. Shere Khan just brushed it off, however, laughing internally.

Then he was back to business as he detected deer in the distance. The tiger slowed down; they were ambush hunters, meaning that they got as close to their prey as possible and then attacked from behind, in most circumstances. The deer was small enough prey, so the tiger could bite Bambi on the back of the neck, teeth penetrating and crushing the spine so the deer's nerves were damaged and it would die. If it had been larger prey, the tactic would be go to around and for the throat, squeezing the air tube until it was broken. That was how a human would die. But then again, it was always fun to sneak up on them too. Their skin wasn't especially thick - a tiger's teeth could slice through it easily.

This made Shere Khan smile on the inside. He chuckled, and then sprang for the deer - hopefully Joanie liked venison!

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 12:35 pm UTC (link)

After finding a suitable spot in the forest, Joanie got to work. She started by tucking Sam's clothing up in the crook of a tree to keep it dry, and subsequently creating a low stool for her to sit on. Moving her skirts out of the way, she set about creating a suitable fireplace.

A circle of snow became a metal disc approximately three feet in diameter, with a metal rod on either end of disc. Between the rods ran a third that would serve as the makeshift rotisserie for the meat. Then, it was time to gather some wood.

Joanie wasn't sure how well tinder she created would burn, and decided that sticking to nature on this one was probably the best call. Trying not to get snow in her boots, she awkwardly stumbled about, looking for fallen branches and dead twigs. "I must say, child, that I'm impressed by how far you've progressed on your own."

Rolling her eyes, Joanie stooped to pick up a long branch that was resting atop a pile of snow. Grunting, she dragged it along with swift steps, trying to ignore the pain in her back. "Well kudos to me," she replied bitterly. "I'm so glad to hear that I'm not the massive failure you expected me to be."

The Witch tsk'd as she reached the metal disc, leaving the branch beside it before setting out to collect more. "Are you always so defensive? It doesn't suit you."

Gritting her teeth, Joanie collected an armful of smaller sticks, shaking the snow from them as she amassed a small bundle. "Are you my mom now? Because getting lectured on how to be a good person by some random psycho bitch that abducts children to steal their footwear is a little creepy."

"I'd burn my uterus if you had come out of it." Joanie tensed, clenching her jaw as her face flushed red with anger. "Or perhaps you would have, with that temper."

"You've got no room to talk," she snapped, making her way back to the disc and beginning to build a "fireplace" with the collected wood. "So just cut the lecture series short, okay? I don't need anybody to tell me what to do."

Her voice was a bored drawl in the back of her mind. "Because you're doing so well on your own?"

Joanie snapped the branch in half. "This conversation is over," she hissed, prepared to say something else when she heard the sound of a deer screaming. Eyes wide, she clutched the branch to her chest in a displaced comfort gesture. "He got something," she whispered, not sure if she was relieved or terrified.

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 12:57 pm UTC (link)

The deer (RIP Bambi) was now dangling limply in the steel grip of Shere Khan's jaws. Satisfied, he began dragging the deer away to a safe place for eating - such was the standard procedure for gifted tiger hunters such as himself.

Give me a break, Sam scoffed. What do you want, a victory scratch under the chin?

You are trying my patience, human, the tiger responded, sounding irritated. Even though he was disgruntled with the fact that Sam was still talking, Shere Khan continued along on the trek to find the human girl. He got busy tracking her scent, still dragging the deer, while Sam attempted to flip through the tiger's memories - but Shere Khan was stubborn, and kept a wall up for now.

He emerged into the clearing where Joanie had started the fire, dropping the dead deer by her feet. Tigers usually started at the rear when they ate, and often gorged themselves, but Sam was yelling to let Joanie cut what she wanted so the tiger exhaled impatiently and sat on his haunches, looking at her.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 01:11 pm UTC (link)

Though the tiger was quiet, she could hear the sound of its kill dragging in the snow behind it. Tensing, Joanie stood, looking over the flames of the crackling fire to see the beast emerge into the small clearing with a dead deer held tightly in its jaws. She gulped down bile, refusing to look at the animal's dead eyes.

As the tiger approached her, she tensed, half-expecting to be his dessert. However, he merely dropped the kill before her and waited. She stared for a moment, not sure if this was genuine or a trick, before crouching down to scoop up a handful of snow. "Sakeen," she whispered, creating a butcher's cleaver. It was heavy in her palm, which boded well. Dragging the deer up over the stool so that she would have something hard to hold it on, she steadied its neck with one hand. She bit her lip, adjusting her fingers on the cleaver before bringing it down sharply on the little animal's neck.

The head snapped clean off, dropping to lay in the snow below. A curtain of deep red blood began to seep from the wound, causing Joanie to gag. But she managed to maintain her composure, looking away from the fallen head to move the corpse slightly in order to cut it right behind the end of the front legs. Groaning at the sight of more blood - and a bit of wet, glistening flesh - she left the small piece on the stool and set the cleaver down, hefting the rest of the corpse in her hands and twisting to face the tiger.

She held the rest of the deer away from herself, stooping to lay it down gingerly before the predator. She had no way of knowing how much of Sam was present, but for the moment, she wasn't about to take any risks in insulting an enormous tiger. "Thank you, Shere Khan," she said, making very brief eye contact as she presented the carcass. Pulling back from it, she took a step back and waited tensely.

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 01:30 pm UTC (link)

Sam hated not being able to talk, but there was nothing he could do about it at this current time. So he glowered there, trapped in a tiger's head - a tiger who had all the control.

Shere Khan made a huffing, snorty sort of sound - he made the noise through his nose, nodding his head. It was the tiger's 'hello' sound, but it could be used as 'you're welcome, ~~you silly, pathetic HUMAN!~~' too. Tigers often used their tails to communicate, and his was relaxed which meant that he was relaxed as well. It was when the tail lowered and started twitching, that was what meant the tiger was angry. But Shere Khan was in a good mood because food was right here, so his tail swished back and forth as he held the meat down with his paws, the claws put away for now, and began ripping and tearing into it with his razor-sharp teeth.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 01:56 pm UTC (link)

Though Joanie had no idea how to read "tiger," she figured that when he huffed in her direction and didn't follow that up by ripping out her throat, that he was at least not going to kill her today. As he began to rip at the corpse, she blanched, picking up the cleaver and turning to her own portion.

She shifted the cleaver into a thinner knife, hoping to manage to pry the skin from the meat. Her stomach was flip-flopping all over the place and she couldn't fight the urge to hurl, but she stayed the course and managed to de-skin the meatier portions. The skinny legs she hacked off with the cleaver, dropping them down to join the head in the snow.

After skewering the meat and holding it over the flame, she created a new stool to sit on. She wiped her hands off in the snow and then held them in her lap, facing the fire tersely. A part of her wanted to speak, but a larger part of her wanted to stay silent. Just hearing the sounds of Shere Khan destroying his prey was enough to make her want to vomit all over again, and she feared that if she opened her mouth she just might do that.

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 02:13 pm UTC (link)

Shere Khan finished his tasty delicious dinner, and then began covering up the remains with vegetation and debris in order to conceal the carcass from things like vultures - it was tiger habit, and probably better to cover as much as possible in this situation anyway.

He slunk towards Joanie, looking as if he were on the prowl as usual, then sat across from her, near the fire. The tiger looked as if he were expecting her to talk. He swished his tail again, indicating that he wouldn't dream of ripping her throat out all the way back to her spine today.

Go to hell, Sam snarled but it was a weak sound, and he was awfully glad that having the tiger take over regularly was uncommon.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 02:24 pm UTC (link)

When the tiger had finished eating, Joanie's food was still cooking. She was fine with waiting. Honestly, she'd rather wait and not die than chow down and get destroyed by some sort of horrendous disease. So she just watched the fire crackle, feeding a few twigs in here and there to feel like she was being useful.

She tensed slightly as the tiger approached, gaze glued to him as he sat near her. Though he was a tiger - a non-human animal - she saw a strange expression in his face. It was almost anticipatory, like he was waiting for something. Her gaze followed the swish of his tail, and her fingers tightened around one another.

"Animals like us, dear."

"I don't think that enslaving creatures gives you Tarzan status." Joanie pursed her lips, watching the tiger silently.

"Do you have a smart response to everything?"

"Yeah. Get used to it."

A brittle cackle filled her head, causing her to press a hand to her temple in irritation. "I don't think I'll have to, dear."

What a bitch. She looked from the fire to the tiger, shifting just slightly so that she was turned a bit more towards him. "Do you think we should go back to town after this?" she asked, not sure what kind of response she was expecting. "Or...will you be here, Shere Khan?" The last thing they needed was to draw attention to themselves with a giant fucking tiger.

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 02:51 pm UTC (link)

Shere Khan was still staring expectantly, and his ears twitched when Joanie began to talk. Finally! Now perhaps the restless human squirming around in his head would cease. But the tiger made a noise of protest at her question - going back to town like this would most certainly draw attention, yes. They probably shouldn't go into town until tomorrow morning.

He got up and padded over to where Joanie was sitting, resting his gigantic head in her lap, and he made a moaning sound, meant to be one of gentle coaxing. It was a type of tiger communication, as male tigers often moaned before mating, in order to help the female feel more relaxed. And he had a thick fur coat, so he was nice and warm. If he couldn't kill her and have her for dessert, he may as well try to be accommodating.

Are you hitting on her? What the fuck is this? Get off, you stupid cat! Get off, get off, get off! Sam was annoyed, but it took so much energy to vocalize. The tiger knew that too, and he was vastly amused. He just put a mental paw on Sam's face and shoved him back down into the depths of his tiger mind. Humans were so easy to get all riled up.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 03:26 pm UTC (link)

The sound of protest confirmed her concerns. Sam wouldn't be coming back anytime soon, which meant that now they needed to stay alive while hiding the fact that Shere Khan was a bigass tiger. She wondered briefly if they could sneak back to the barn after nightfall. After all, it had been a rather warm place, though introducing the tiger to all those squishy people was probably not a good idea. Besides, she supposed it wasn't necessary that they return to the barn. Nobody would notice, most likely.

"Javert would be pissed if he didn't get the chance to shoot me," she thought bitterly.

The Witch chuckled. "Why are you surprised by this? I keep telling you to take care of the Inspector, and still you resist."

She grit her teeth. "I am not "taking care of" my friend."

"We'll see how long that lasts, dear."

Ignoring the Witch's amusement, Joanie focused on complete shock as Shere Khan dropped his head in her lap. She gasped, unsure of how to react, and stared at him numbly for a moment. The gentle moan sounded completely out of place coming from a fearsome tiger, and it almost made her laugh. Instead, she tentatively rested a hand on his head, scratching behind one of his ears.

The warmth from his coat was almost palpable, warming her legs as he rested heavily on them. "I guess we can wait for nightfall and see what we can do," she muttered, continuing to scratch lightly at his ear. "We might be able to get back to the barn...or not, I can't remember exactly how to get back."

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tiger_says_rawr
2010-06-21 03:41 pm UTC (link)

Guhhfiutueidffhtgurisnvjhab!!!!!!!!! was Sam's mental keyboard smash, pissed off because if he put his head in Joanie's lap, she'd probably shove a hot poker up his nose. Shere Khan was only doing it to be arrogant and rub it in Sam's face. This angered him more than anything.

The tiger huffed again, as if offended that Joanie said she couldn't remember her way back. He remembered the way, thank you, and could show her. This tiger was a deadly jungle spy! But if she didn't want to go back, he would maybe let her use him as a warm pillow.

You are definitely going to be a fucking pillow, Sam grumbled. And then a throw rug on the back of my couch, he added.

Keep quiet, before I kill things I really want to kill. I'm being awfully generous right now, and you need to be more appreciative. The tiger scooted off of his new headrest and went back to sitting on his haunches, regal and snooty. This was his territory now.

At least you're not spraying the trees with piss, Sam remarked dryly.

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wickedwicker
2010-06-21 03:49 pm UTC (link)

At the tiger's huff, she raised a brow. "I'm sorry," she said, though her tone wasn't apologetic in the least. "I got a bit distracted by getting dragged to the stables and I didn't leave a trail of bread crumbs to get me back." Somewhere in the back of her mind, she knew that being sarcastic to Shere Khan was probably not the smartest thing. However, it was his fault for making her feel more comfortable. So if he had a problem, it was his to confront.

Granted, tigers confronted problems by eating them, not by rationalizing.

"But if you could track us back...we might be able to do it when the sun sets." She frowned. "Finding a new place would be hard, and I am not freezing to death in this fucking country."

When the tiger withdrew, she looked to the venison on the spit. She turned it slightly, looking at the roasted char on its surface. It was coming along nicely. Sitting back, she sighed, removing her hat and letting her hair fall down unceremoniously around her shoulders. "The last time something like this happened...it was only for a few hours. And we were in little rooms." She frowned, touching her fingers to her chin. "I...I don't know when we'll get back."

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tiger_says_rawr, 2010-06-21 03:58 pm UTC

wickedwicker, 2010-06-21 04:42 pm UTC

tiger_says_rawr, 2010-06-21 05:16 pm UTC

wickedwicker, 2010-06-21 05:30 pm UTC

tiger_says_rawr, 2010-06-21 05:43 pm UTC

wickedwicker, 2010-06-21 06:00 pm UTC

tiger_says_rawr, 2010-06-21 06:11 pm UTC

wickedwicker, 2010-06-21 07:13 pm UTC

tiger_says_rawr, 2010-06-21 07:27 pm UTC

wickedwicker, 2010-06-21 07:43 pm UTC

tiger_says_rawr, 2010-06-21 10:04 pm UTC

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