InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Mind the gap."

Danny Ketch (heavensfool) wrote in wariscomingcom,
@ 2011-06-07 00:55:00

Entry tags:

danny ketch, ron weasley, sam winchester

Every time I light up some sick fucker's soul and leave them writhing in some alley reliving all the pain they've ever caused anyone, I like it. Then I hate myself for liking it, but I can't stop.

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	ex_demonbloo908 2011-06-07 05:23 am UTC (link)
	I actually know how that feels. And it's terrifying. (Reply to this) (Thread)

heavensfool
2011-06-07 05:34 am UTC (link)

It's how Zadkiel got to me. His pusher, Mister Eleven, told me that they could only give me little hits until they were sure I could handle getting it all back, and that I pretty much had a heavenly sanction for anything I did. They got me so strung out that even when I had a dose I had the shakes. By the time he gave it back to me in full my only friend left in the world was dead and I was about to lose my soul to the spirit. That's when I gave my soul to him.

And I know I haven't even started to get over it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	ex_demonbloo908 2011-06-07 05:40 am UTC (link)
	They strung you out to steal your soul? Why? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

heavensfool
2011-06-07 05:55 am UTC (link)

The angels on my world can't touch the Spirit of Vengeance power directly. It's some kind of safeguard. But it was the only power Zadkiel could use to blow up heaven's walls so he could stampede in with his Black Host. I was already a junkie. The exorcism was a mistake. A week afterward I was so bad I tried to light myself on fire in Times Square, got my picture in the Bugle for the whole damn city to see. Probably the country or even the world, I think it and the article was on their website.

Zadkiel just took advantage of the opportunity to manipulate me into giving in too much to the Spirit. We can overdose. Give in too much and the Spirits grafted to our souls cannibalize the rest of our soul and leave us with nothing but aimless vengeance. We become total monsters worse than the fucking Punisher. He knew that stringing me out, finally giving me the full dose, and then killing Mary would make me do just that, and he knew that I'd dedicate myself to him if he offered to save me from becoming that.

I was too blinded by addiction to ask the smart questions or listen when Mary told me I was in over my head. He used me and once I had collected all of the power by killing every other Ghost Rider - my brother included - he pointed me like a gun and used me to blow down heaven's walls.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

ex_demonbloo908
2011-06-07 06:40 am UTC (link)

I don't turn into a skeleton bursting with flames or ride around on some kind of kickass motorcycle, but being manipulated by higher powers who were able to fuel an addiction of mine to break an entrance leading them to something they wanted? Yeah. I'm there.

It started when I was on a suicidal, drunken binge too. Go figure. I feel like you might have me beat out with the lighting yourself on fire thing, though. I just stopped caring on my part ; went around and chased down the worst monsters I could get my hands on, half drunk in the process, tried to make deals with demons that didn't wanna listen, and eventually sunk to the kind of lows that I'd never imagine myself getting into by screwing a demon. Fortunately, that demon was Ruby, so at least one good thing came out of it.

I'm sorry about your brother. Did you ever get Zadkiel back for what he screwed you into? Sounds like the asshole has a lot coming to him.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

	weasleyisrking 2011-06-07 05:29 am UTC (link)
	You're weird. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	heavensfool 2011-06-07 05:36 am UTC (link)
	I'm jealous of your never-ending candy closet. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	weasleyisrking 2011-06-07 05:41 am UTC (link)
	You should be. And you're still a bit mental there, mate. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	heavensfool 2011-06-07 05:58 am UTC (link)
	I think that might have been the best wish. I know. I still don't really know how to start fixing myself. But I'm better than I was. I stopped drinking and I'm not trying to jump off the complex roof anymore. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	weasleyisrking 2011-06-07 01:15 pm UTC (link)
	If you're for it, you can bring in a few bags and the like and help yourself to it. Just stop being so mental. I take it you didn't have a broom on you when you went for the jump? (Reply to this) (Parent)

	withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 07:07 am UTC (link)
	This is pretty much exactly why I hope I never meet you in an alley somewhere. Or pretty much anywhere that you'd actually roast me on the spot. Because you should. I don't even have the excuse of being a spirit of vengeance or whatever. I just like it. (Reply to this) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 02:42 pm UTC (link)
	What if the people deserve it? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren? withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 04:36 pm UTC (link)
	That just makes it more fun. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 04:51 pm UTC (link)
	I'll bet. If you could do it to someone that deserved it, and they wouldn't actually die. Would you? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 04:53 pm UTC (link)
	I can't even lie, this isn't fa How am I supposed t Yes. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 04:55 pm UTC (link)
	Fine. Consider it an offer. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 04:57 pm UTC (link)
	Do you even know what you're getting yourself into? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 05:04 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah. I really do. Long as you don't dismember me completely I'll be okay (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 05:12 pm UTC (link)
	Okay. If you want me to stop, you need to tell me early. If I get into it, I won't listen. I kind of get lost in it, and I won't care if you tell me to stop. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 05:17 pm UTC (link)
	If you take enough breaks, get me some blood. I'll heal. Clean slate over and over. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 05:24 pm UTC (link)
	How often do you need breaks? Just so I know. I'll... use a timer, or something. So I don't forget. And I'll bring blood. Got a preference on the type? ...can I ask why the hell you're doing this? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 05:26 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah well...Living. Fresh. So the idea would be we take breaks, you let me drink which is good cause presumably I'd be restrained and then you do what you do after it heals me. I get blood without having to kill and you get what you need. I'm doing it cause I deserve to suffer. Cause I've hurt people. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 05:37 pm UTC (link)
	Oh... from me, you mean. That's not going to turn me, is it? Okay. I don't need to know more than that, just... I'm the best at this. I wanted to make sure you're serious. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 05:42 pm UTC (link)
	Nah. Its point of death. Then I'd have to give you mine. That's how it works. If I just drink from you it'll fill me. It'll help me heal. I am. ...Just between us though. No one knows, not your girlfriend or your brother. No one. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 05:47 pm UTC (link)
	Okay. Deal, then. I won't say a word. But we might want to wait until this is over; if someone asks me where I'm going, I don't want to accidentally come out with 'off to torture Lauren' and I won't be able to help it if they do ask. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 05:50 pm UTC (link)
	You're right. Its a lot more sensible just to wait. You sure you're good with this? Letting me feed from you and all? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 06:39 pm UTC (link)
	As long as there's no risk, I don't care. Probably would'a bothered me, before, but... whatever. It doesn't now. It's not a big deal. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 09:42 pm UTC (link)
	There isn't. Soon as we can lie again we'll start. Okay? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 09:47 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah. Sounds good to me. This a one-time thing, or did you want to do it more than that? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Lauren cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 09:51 pm UTC (link)
	More than once. We'll see how you get on this time. How about that (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Lauren withgunsdrawn 2011-06-07 10:07 pm UTC (link)
	Yeah, that works. ...thanks for this. It's weird to say that, I guess, but, you know. Yeah. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Dean cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 10:30 pm UTC (link)
	Mutually beneficial. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	cantsavemyself 2011-06-07 02:41 pm UTC (link)
	And probably they deserve it. It probably balances out (Reply to this)