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ΗΑΔΕΣ ([info]underworldly) wrote in [info]valarnet,
@ 2017-02-03 08:48:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:hades, hazel levesque, katherine pierce, megara, roman godfrey, steven universe

Damn, so let me tell you about this year's Oscar goody bag. You know how when you were a kid (well, maybe not some of you - fuck, am I that old?) you went to classmates birthday parties and got goody bags at the end? Yeah, they do that for the Oscars too (by the way, Inferno's gonna sweep again - just saying my 'Best Director' trophy is coming soon).

Last year's swag bag was out of control.

Among other things, there was a breast lift, personalized M&M's, a 10-day trip to Israel, a 15-day walking tour of Japan, laser treatments, a vaporizer, and (kids, don't look), a vibrator. That sucker is worth $250, I mean, it was top of the line.

The Academy totally got on their asses for all that too, so this year it'll probably 'pale' in comparison. I'll keep you updated.


(Post a new comment)


[info]and_steven
2017-02-03 03:36 pm UTC (link)
What's a vibrator?

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 03:45 pm UTC (link)
You're shitting me. Right?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]and_steven
2017-02-03 03:48 pm UTC (link)
It sounds like the name of an evil villain.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 03:55 pm UTC (link)
Yeah, not so much, but I don't think I feel comfortable enlightening you about vibrators. You have parents or something?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]and_steven
2017-02-03 04:01 pm UTC (link)
You are the one who mentioned it.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 04:02 pm UTC (link)
I believe I told kids to look away, so that was kinda insubordinate of you, huh?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 04:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 04:19 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 04:31 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 04:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 04:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 04:45 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 04:46 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 04:47 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 04:49 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 04:52 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 04:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 04:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 06:37 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:38 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]and_steven, 2017-02-03 08:26 pm UTC

[info]nutmegs
2017-02-03 04:48 pm UTC (link)
Did we attend a sex toy party or an awards ceremony?

They're beginning to seem interchangeable.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 04:52 pm UTC (link)
Both? Well, the after-party is largely considered the sex toy party.

Speaking of, I got something for you.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]nutmegs
2017-02-03 05:00 pm UTC (link)
Please oh please tell me it's got nothing to do with breast lifts or an overly expensive vibrator.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 05:03 pm UTC (link)
Your breasts are fine where they are, and no. No pricey vibrators. Just a little something for Oscar night, Nutmeg. Besides the countdown calendar that I've plastered everywhere.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]nutmegs
2017-02-03 05:24 pm UTC (link)
How can I forget? I have daily reminders on my e-mail that pop up with 'X days until Oscars' in case it just so happens to slip my mind. Thanks for that, boss.

But now you've got my curiosity so you better spill before I 'accidentally' drop your coffee all over your laptop. ♥

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 05:28 pm UTC (link)
No problem. Happy to help.

Damn, Nutmeg. You know when you threaten me it gets me all hot and bothered. I'd prefer to give it to you in person though. Hint: It's shiny.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]nutmegs, 2017-02-03 05:34 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 05:40 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nutmegs, 2017-02-03 05:42 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 05:44 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nutmegs, 2017-02-03 05:53 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 05:56 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nutmegs, 2017-02-03 06:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nutmegs, 2017-02-03 06:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:08 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nutmegs, 2017-02-03 06:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:13 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]nutmegs, 2017-02-03 06:15 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:33 pm UTC

[info]fivecenturies
2017-02-03 04:59 pm UTC (link)
Mmm, life goals. Fashion swag isn't as fancy.

Congrats on the movie success, Mr. Big Man.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 05:02 pm UTC (link)
It's insane, right? I really hope there's a trip in it this year. Getting away from here for a little seems like a good idea.

Hey, thanks. You seem familiar, have we met?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]fivecenturies
2017-02-03 05:20 pm UTC (link)
They don't seem to be skimping on the perks. You'll get your wish - mine usually include beauty products, designer trinkets and the most expensive diet pill of the year.

Katherine Pierce. We might have frequented some parties before.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 05:22 pm UTC (link)
We'll probably find out in a couple of weeks. I really just want the trophy, laser treatments and vapes be damned.

Oh, no doubt. You into acting, or only modeling?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]fivecenturies
2017-02-03 05:33 pm UTC (link)
Toss some of those unwanted products over here if you've got no use. I'll gladly take them off your hands. ;)

Most of the acting I've ever done is impersonating my boring twin in our younger years, but it's been all modeling. I'm on a break for family things. I wouldn't mind a career expansion though.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-03 05:41 pm UTC (link)
Hey, I very well might. I've got no use for some of that stuff. Sharing is caring.

Well, drop off your portfolio sometime. I'm always looking for fresh faces.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]fivecenturies, 2017-02-03 05:50 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 05:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]fivecenturies, 2017-02-03 06:05 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:07 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]fivecenturies, 2017-02-03 06:09 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:11 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]fivecenturies, 2017-02-03 06:14 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-03 06:32 pm UTC

[info]sheeeyut
2017-02-04 10:46 am UTC (link)
A breast lift.

I know it's a surgery, but it's an unfortunate name. All I can picture is a fork lift following these women around all day, holding their sagging tits up.

(Reply to this) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-04 01:09 pm UTC (link)
Ha! That's some great imagery. But it really is a terrible name. Whatever makes them happy, I guess, even if it's not necessary to have breasts right beneath chins.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]sheeeyut
2017-02-04 10:00 pm UTC (link)
Down to the belly button with nipples tucked underneath might be a little excessive, though.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]underworldly
2017-02-04 10:06 pm UTC (link)
Maybe. My thing is I'll just let my lady friend decide what she wants to do with her own tits though, since that's the only pair I care much about.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]sheeeyut
2017-02-04 10:15 pm UTC (link)
That's very decent of you. I don't think I'll ever be in the market for an "old lady" so I won't have to worry either way. Swag bags containing free breast lifts and vibrators makes one question the extent of misogyny in Hollywood, though.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-04 10:17 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheeeyut, 2017-02-04 10:25 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-04 10:27 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheeeyut, 2017-02-04 10:51 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-04 10:54 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheeeyut, 2017-02-04 10:55 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-04 10:58 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheeeyut, 2017-02-04 11:02 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]underworldly, 2017-02-04 11:04 pm UTC
(no subject) - [info]sheeeyut, 2017-02-04 11:11 pm UTC

[info]goldandjewels
2017-02-05 06:29 am UTC (link)
Too late. I saw it. Now I wish I hadn't.

(Reply to this) (Thread)

HOW DID I MISS THIS, I AM SORRY
[info]underworldly
2017-02-27 01:54 pm UTC (link)
Uhhhh, too bad I don't have that Men in Black eraser thingee, right?

Though I do have water from the River of Forgetfulness.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

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