InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Come along, Pond!"

ιѕαвєℓα (rivaini) wrote in valarnet,
@ 2016-06-15 09:21:00

Entry tags:

alistair theirin, garrett hawke, isabela, kitiara uth matar, lina inverse, nico robin, raistlin majere

Oh, Andraste's sagging arse, I'm quite over the likes of Thedas. I suppose it was good that I was warned my lover would volunteer to stay behind in the Fade in some act of heroism or some shit like that. Because otherwise, waking up to find the letter from his best friend regarding his death there on the nightstand would be a really bad fucking surprise.

I need a few of Dorian's sparkly balls to take my mind off this.

But the lighter part of it all is that I got a new outfit? One with actual trousers this time, a very grown-up swashbuckling outfit, complete with gigantic pirate hat. I feel about a thousand years old by the time the Inquisition happens, but I look great and am still stabbing people so I suppose that's also a good thing.

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	rivaini 2016-06-15 03:09 pm UTC (link)
	Sex and alcohol will do, though I wouldn't say no to chocolate something or other? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 03:14 pm UTC (link)
	Chocolate and something stupidly disgusting, like a teddybear. I'm sorry you dreamed that, love. I don't really know what protocol is with this sort of thing, but I'm sure I went down fighting with your glorious tits and ass in mind. And with hopes that you wouldn't forget to feed Dog. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 03:21 pm UTC (link)
	Would you really get me a teddy bear? That's sweet. No one's ever gotten me one before, come to think of it. Maybe he's right, maybe you got out somehow. By the power of my tits and ass. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 03:54 pm UTC (link)
	A massive one the size of Dog! I hope he doesn't hump it though. I wouldn't put it past me to use that as an excuse to fake my death, that way people can leave me the fuck alone and I can retire for a bloody change. I saw what my beard looks like during this asshole in the sky debacle, I was not pleased. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 03:57 pm UTC (link)
	Poor thing, we need to find him a female Mabari. Too bad there aren't any around. Just make sure you come find me when you get out of there, so I can punch you in the dick for making me worry like that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 04:07 pm UTC (link)
	His balls are still very much intact and I've not the heart to sever. He's got a chance to fatherhood, that one. Someday. But can you punch me in the dick with your lips? That's much more prefered and expresses your love. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 04:09 pm UTC (link)
	Now you know everyone's going to want a warhound puppy. I think Leliana's top of the wait list. You lecherous old man! Maybe. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 04:18 pm UTC (link)
	Why? Creepy Nun has a zoo already without a warhound. I'm not old. I'm still very flexible and my stamina's top-notch, you take that back. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 04:21 pm UTC (link)
	She's not a nun, or at least, wasn't when we had a threesome. You are rather virile and rugged even as we age, aren't you? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 04:30 pm UTC (link)
	Dare I ask how many threesomes you've had? There was the one with Zevran I was at least present for. Yes. The rest of me will die before my cock does. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 04:35 pm UTC (link)
	Oh, bollocks, I can't remember! A lot? But I forgot about that one 'til you brought it up. That was fun! Admittedly I'd probably be less into the idea here. That doesn't even surprise me in the slightest, given how infamous you were around the brothels. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 04:40 pm UTC (link)
	With Zevran or in general? I don't know if I'd use the word infamous. That was my uncle. I bathed myself in boiling water after I saw him at The Blooming Rose. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 04:43 pm UTC (link)
	In general! Unless it was your birthday or Christmas and that's what you really wanted or something. Oh, the Blooming Rose. One of Kirkwall's finest relics. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 04:46 pm UTC (link)
	That's...so incredibly sweet, but I think I'll pass. It was surprisingly clean though. But then again blacklights didn't exist during those times to reveal the true horrors hidden within. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 04:49 pm UTC (link)
	Good, I'll get you other fun toys for those holidays. Maker's testicles, the whole place was probably covered with spunk. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 04:52 pm UTC (link)
	Thanks, love, I'd love a Playstation 4. Fond memories, though. Very fond. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 04:59 pm UTC (link)
	Bollocks to that! I'd never see you again. Unless I laid naked atop the Playstation 4. That was where we had a few missions, right? Where we tracked down Velasco and he dragged me unconscious from the room. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 05:22 pm UTC (link)
	That's a theory that must be tested. That and the whacky blood mage that tried to make me slit my own throat. She was a particularly rude lady of the night. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 05:25 pm UTC (link)
	I wonder if Carver was as popular there as Gamlen? I know he went a few times. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	maleficar 2016-06-15 05:26 pm UTC (link)
	Stop. Just stop. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	rivaini 2016-06-15 05:26 pm UTC (link)
	Bwahaha! ;) (Reply to this) (Parent)

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