Tweak

InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "She bang, she bang!"

Username: 
Password:    
Remember Me
  • Create Account
  • IJ Login
  • OpenID Login
Search by : 
  • View
    • Create Account
    • IJ Login
    • OpenID Login
  • Journal
    • Post
    • Edit Entries
    • Customize Journal
    • Comment Settings
    • Recent Comments
    • Manage Tags
  • Account
    • Manage Account
    • Viewing Options
    • Manage Profile
    • Manage Notifications
    • Manage Pictures
    • Manage Schools
    • Account Status
  • Friends
    • Edit Friends
    • Edit Custom Groups
    • Friends Filter
    • Nudge Friends
    • Invite
    • Create RSS Feed
  • Asylums
    • Post
    • Asylum Invitations
    • Manage Asylums
    • Create Asylum
  • Site
    • Support
    • Upgrade Account
    • FAQs
    • Search By Location
    • Search By Interest
    • Search Randomly

Sarah Connor is cursed to be ever vigilant ([info]ever_vigilant) wrote in [info]valarnet,
@ 2012-06-23 19:26:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:eric packer, james kirk, kitty pryde (shadowcat), neena thurman (domino), pete wisdom, romany wisdom, wade wilson (deadpool)


Wanted: Fuck Buddy.
Stipulations: You don't call me the next day to talk about your emotions. You don't even call me the next day unless it's to see if you're spending the night. I like beer, whiskey, and pizza, I like my coffee black, and I don't keep cream or sugar at my apartment. If you want that shit, run to the store. I welcome offers of random takeout foods, but no MSG.

Complicated Emotional Bullshit is not an option. If you can't fit that bill, don't even bother messaging me.

I'm quirky and I'll be the first to admit it, and I don't take any shit, but I can drink with the best of them, and I'm not afraid of meeting you in person so you can see for yourself that I'm exactly who I claim to be.

You can even run a background check, son.

A british accent would be nice for reading me the phonebook a Chinese Takeout Menu one of my Gun Manuals afterwards, but isn't necessarily a requirement.

Wade, just no. And all of you Feds? Don't worry, this isn't a business transaction, so go sniff for idiotic prostitution announcements somewhere else, like Facebook.


(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]ever_vigilant
2012-06-24 02:59 am UTC (link)
No dice, there needs to be someone IN my bed first.

Silly Brit. You know how particular I am about these things.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:06 am UTC (link)
Again? I'll be right over.

So I can help you shoot the freaks you're going to be invaded by, for posting this shite on the valar net.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]ever_vigilant
2012-06-24 03:12 am UTC (link)
I didn't even give them an address. How are they going to show up at my door?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:13 am UTC (link)
IP.

No, I'm not talking about what I just did ten minutes ago, but I'm sure there's some wily fuckers who can trace you.

Or smart arses, like Pryde.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]ever_vigilant
2012-06-24 03:16 am UTC (link)
I'm sure you're making more of a big deal out of this than is strictly necessary.

You're scaring away the men. Stop acting like my over protective big-brother with attachment issues.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:18 am UTC (link)
Someone has to. It's a very big deal.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]ever_vigilant
2012-06-24 03:19 am UTC (link)
Right. Okay.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:22 am UTC (link)
Would you like me to message my sister and have her send you a catalogue?

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]ever_vigilant
2012-06-24 03:26 am UTC (link)
Nothing in that catalog is going to take the place of the real thing, and I think you probably know that.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:27 am UTC (link)
I don't know. I recall my sis saying that some things were incredibly lifelike.

You could probably find something with squirting action, I'd imagine.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]ever_vigilant
2012-06-24 03:32 am UTC (link)
...

I feel we've discussed this topic enough.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]goddesswisdom
2012-06-24 03:32 am UTC (link)
I can supply.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]ever_vigilant
2012-06-24 03:35 am UTC (link)
No, thank you.

You might want to get something for Pete, though. :D

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]goddesswisdom
2012-06-24 03:38 am UTC (link)
I've bought him a fleshlight.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 04:08 am UTC (link)
We're going to find out if it has any sort of suction, when I attempt to attach it to your forehead. Permanently.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]goddesswisdom
2012-06-24 04:15 am UTC (link)
I could use it on you, duck.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 04:18 am UTC (link)
I just puked in my mouth.

Do not want. Cheers.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]goddesswisdom
2012-06-24 04:18 am UTC (link)
Jus' doin' my sisterly duty.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 04:19 am UTC (link)
Just waiting to pull a Hendrix. Think I'd better roll on my back while the puke's still working it's way out.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]goddesswisdom, 2012-06-24 04:21 am UTC

[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:37 am UTC (link)
Ask and you shalt receive.

All hail the arrival of the dark beast, Satan.

Sorry I haven't been home. I was trying to drink myself to...bliss. It didn't work.

Anyway really, Thurman. Maybe Romany can help. We should discuss it more.

Then you should let me know what you decide to do. So I can make this face at you. :D

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]goddesswisdom
2012-06-24 03:38 am UTC (link)
I'll bring her the special selection.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:39 am UTC (link)
You should give it to me and then I'll give it to her when I stop in to read her the gun manuals and whatnot. Or maybe I can read the catalogue to her.

I think she might enjoy that.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]goddesswisdom
2012-06-24 03:40 am UTC (link)
It'll be waiting on the couch.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]mister_wisdom
2012-06-24 03:43 am UTC (link)
You bought a couch? Oh, wait. Are you in the new flat already, then?

Brilliant. Leave me the address and the booklet outside the door, because it's probably crowded with the dead you've raised, already.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]goddesswisdom
2012-06-24 03:44 am UTC (link)
It's Feng Shui'd and everything. I set your room up with a bed, a dresser, a fireproof gun safe, and no carpet.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

(no subject) - [info]mister_wisdom, 2012-06-24 03:48 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]goddesswisdom, 2012-06-24 03:49 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_wisdom, 2012-06-24 03:52 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]goddesswisdom, 2012-06-24 03:53 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_wisdom, 2012-06-24 03:56 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]goddesswisdom, 2012-06-24 04:15 am UTC
(no subject) - [info]mister_wisdom, 2012-06-24 12:44 pm UTC

(Read comments) -

Home | Site Map | Manage Account | TOS | Privacy | Support | FAQs