Christopher Pike (daretodobetter) wrote in thedoorway, @ 2013-05-01 15:52:00 |
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Entry tags: | !log, !thread, christopher pike (movies), leonard mccoy |
Who: Christopher Pike & Leonard McCoy
When: Saturday night, April 27
Where: Pike's flat
What: Bones walks in on something interesting
Rating: PG13 for language
Pike knew this was a bad idea. These were people's fantasies. Largely inaccurate fantasies at that, but still, here he was, spending his Saturday night reading erotica that involved him and Boyce. There weren't a lot, but there were some that made his heart ache. And one about the Captain's chair.. Once he'd started reading them, he couldn't stop. He'd put the photo of Boyce up next to the screen and kept reading, relaxing as he did. He headed to the kitchen for a beer when he heard a knock. "Come in!" he called from the kitchen. At this point McCoy felt that knocking was merely a precaution based on his recent experience with Pike. So, once Leonard had knocked he just let himself into the apartment. "I just wanted to check in on you before I turned in for the night," Leonard said as he entered the room. He couldn't help giving Pike's open tablet a glance, and I soon as he did, Leonard regretted the action. "You're actually reading that shit now?" He asked, somewhat stupefied. He had thought that Pike had been offended by what Chekov had shared with them earlier-- Leonard had certainly been bothered by what Pike had publicly shared from some of the admiralty's comments-- so he was very much surprised. "Morbid curiosity. Besides, I worry about what Chekov reads on the internet and wanted to be prepared for the next thing he calls to my attention," he called from the kitchen. That had been the truth, but once Pike had found the stories about him and Boyce, well, he was reading them for other reasons. "Want a beer or something stronger?" he called. "No, I'm not thirsty," Leonard replied. Truth be told, he was still seething from the last conversation he'd had with Pike, but he hadn't seen much of the other man in the last week, and he felt no small amount of responsibility for his health and wellbeing. His eyes momentarily strayed back to Pike's tablet-- long enough for him to make out Boyce's name along with Pike's. "I've done what I came here to do, so I think that it might be best if I go ahead and excuse myself for the night." He wouldn't be bothered if he could avoid Pike after what had happened earlier and what he'd just seen. Pike rolled out of the kitchen with a beer in his hand and gave McCoy a quizzical look. "Everything alright, Doc? You just walked in - leaving already?" Pike wasn't sure what was going on giving that despite McCoy's bedside manner, he usually hung around long enough to make a thorough assessment. This time, McCoy hadn't even seen him before leaving. It made no sense. "Boyce and I were together for a long time. I was feeling nostalgic," he said when he caught sight of the tablet. “You know, I’m really not in the mood for it right now,” Leonard replied shortly. He’d thought that he could separate his check-in with Pike from the things that the other man had said earlier, but he couldn’t. Leonard knew that Pike was merely the messenger answering his own question, but it still stung. Add on the fact that he’d just discovered that his Academy mentor had been involved with Pike for a ‘long time’, and Leonard’s mind was on information overload. “So if you’re feeling fine, I’ve got other shit to take care of tonight,” he said, knowing that going to Jim’s to apologize was at the top of his to do list. Pike raised an eyebrow, taking a sip of his beer and assessing McCoy. "I owe you an apology, Leonard," he said, the use of the other man's first name a sign that he was taking this seriously and trying to make amends. "I'm sorry. I should have made sure to say that under wards and I shouldn't have said it at all. I'm not sure how serious any of the brass who made those comments were, but I-" He was going to say he was in a bad head space, but that was status quo since the Narada. There was no point in excuses, even if they were accurate. "I made a lapse in judgement." It didn’t matter how serious any of the comments that Pike had reported had been at the time they’d been offered-- the fact that they’d been spoken at all was enough. “It speaks volumes about the state of the brass,” Leonard replied, vitriol evident in his voice. He looked hard at Pike as the other man continued to speak, and he couldn’t help but wonder what else went on in those closed admiralty meetings, what else was said behind closed doors that never went on the record. He wanted to know how somebody could just sit by and allow that sort of behavior and attitude to continue at the top of an organization without saying anything. The more he thought about it the angrier he became, and that wasn’t what he wanted. “I don’t want to hear another word about it. If that’s all, I’ll take my leave,” he said as he slung his medkit back over his shoulder. It was rare that Pike didn't know what to do, but this was one of those moments. There was a time not long ago where he would have ordered McCoy to attention and they would have had this out here and now, but as Babs kept reminding him, this wasn't Starfleet and he wasn't an officer. His fist clenched. He wasn't used to being yelled at by subordinates. He was used to being yelled at by doctors, but usually that was just for medically related things. And what sort of check in was this where McCoy barely set his bag down. Not that he had any complaints - he didn't enjoy getting poked and prodded, but still. "No. That's not all," Pike said, current situation be damned as he lapsed into command voice. He had no authority to stand on here, even less with McCoy now, but even as two grown men, there was more to be said. "I fucked up, McCoy, I'm admitting that. From the day I first approached you in that bar, I never made any claims about the brass being noble. Starfleet is full of the good, the bad, and the ugly - in terms of officers and enlisted. You knew this, Leonard. Maybe you didn't know the extent of it, but the comments of a few bad eggs are not representative of the whole. You need to know that I do not condone such comments, nor would I ever consider making them or doing any such thing. You are a brilliant doctor. And you're a halfway decent officer too. No one at the Academy or the Brass ever contested your skill - it was just your reluctance to blindly obey and kiss off. And you know what? I respect you for that. No, I don't agree with mouthing off to superior officers all the time - and you didn't - but there are times you need to break the rules. Times like you sneaking Kirk aboard the Enterprise, like Kirk coming after me when I told him not to - a good officer trusts his judgment and doesn't just blindly obey. I never wanted to be an Admiral, McCoy and I still don't. I'd much rather be out there in the black in some god-forsaken galaxy than suffer through another staff meeting. But we're not at Starfleet anymore as people keep reminding me, so probably none of this matters." Leonard let out a humorless laugh by the time that Pike was done speaking, shaking his head at the other man. “And what was all of that for, Pike? You think that I need some sort of positive affirmation from you? From Starfleet? Just because there’s a bunch of shitheads in the brass doesn’t mean that I value myself any less, so you can go ahead and get off your high horse because I’m not seeking approval from anybody here,” he replied. And here Pike was, trying to be Starfleet’s champion when all the sacrifices he’d made had put him exactly where he didn’t want to be. Leonard shook his head again. “You have a good night, sir,” McCoy offered with a nod before he took his leave from Pike’s apartment. "No, I was just trying to make a goddamned apology," Pike said as the door closed on McCoy. "Great. Just fucking great," he mumbled to himself as he chucked the beer bottle against the wall, the sound of glass breaking doing nothing to alleviate his frustrations. He didn't know what to do here, because everything he was, everything he'd tried to be, was worthless here. There was no point to being a Starfleet officer and he even managed to fuck up at that. He couldn't walk, couldn't fly. He didn't know what to do. Grabbing the bottle of scotch, he threw that at the wall as well, not caring at the waste of money. It wasn't like he was supposed to be drinking it anyway. |