InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Have fun is great advice"

Axel King {likes random nudity} (nomoreclothes) wrote in reduxpitch,
@ 2016-05-14 09:46:00

Entry tags:

!thread, character: axel king, location: limbic alley, retired character: ashleigh spinnet

WHO: Axel King and Ashleigh Spinnet
WHAT: ~~FEELINGS~~ Home improvements and Axel embarrassing himself
WHEN: Saturday, May 14; mid-morning
WHERE: Ashleigh's flat
RATING|STATUS: KISSING (Axel is shirtless because of course he is) | Complete!

Truth be told, Axel felt a little awkward with Ashleigh. Ever since he'd admitted his feelings to himself (only out of necessity, really), he wasn't quite sure what to do with himself. Should he continue to flirt with her? Continue to annoy her? She'd assured him that she liked it, but sometimes, like the other day, he got the impression that she really didn't think much of him, and that stung. It was his reaction to that that made him come to grips with that fact that he might be a little in love with her. But just a little. Because it didn't make any sense at all. They were just so opposite. When it came to everything. He was loud and inappropriate and fueled by emotion, and she was responsible and logical.

But she didn't take any crap from him, and she called him on his shit. And despite everything, if he really needed something, she was there. Axel knew that it didn't make much sense, and that probably no one else would understand, but they didn't have to. All that mattered was if he and Ashleigh could understand it. And therein lay the problem. They both didn't understand it. Or anything, apparently. They were always getting their wires crossed, and until this last...incident, he hadn't known why. It was because he had real feelings for her, and either she knew it, or she had them too and just wasn't ready to admit it. Because they didn't really talk about their feelings, they just sort of talked around them, sometimes hinting, but mostly ignoring.

Axel knew he couldn't tell her how he felt, either, even if he was ready, because she wasn't ready. He had never actually been in love before, regardless of how much he liked to pretend he was always in love with the girl of the month, which was partly why he didn't know what to do with himself. And Ashleigh...well, she'd already made it perfectly clear how she felt about changing the nature of relationships. No, telling her was flat out of the question.

Maybe he could show her, though. Or at least force her to consider the possibility that he could be more for her. She said she didn't need help with her flat, and he believed her, but he wanted to prove he was good for something more than just getting on her nerves, so he insisted. Now, Axel didn't actually know anything about renovating, but that was beside the point. He could learn! Research was what Ravenclaws did best, wasn't it? So he found himself a muggle bookstore (because using magic for everything was just too easy) and bought a couple books he thought might help. He'd intended to read them, he really did, but they were boring and he ended up just skimming for things that looked interesting and/or important, and called that good.

Saturday morning, he woke up bright and early, had himself a super healthy breakfast of sugary cereal, and stuck the books in his music bag before heading over and knocking on her door.

(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)

demipointe
2016-05-17 10:28 pm UTC (link)

Perhaps it wasn't the worst thing he could have said, but it was miles away from being helpful. That this was all just a joke to him was a fear Ashleigh hadn't even realised she had. It was such a part of how they acted - he joked, she took it too seriously and somehow both of them found some amusement or value in that. Except Ashleigh needed him not to be joking about this, about whatever it was between them, because if she made herself vulnerable and he laughed at her for it she might not be able to forgive him. "It didn't feel like a joke," she said, still without turning around. Perhaps he really had meant it as one. Perhaps when he'd said it was stupid and he regretted asking it and told her she should have ignored it, he'd meant because it didn't matter to him, but that wasn't how it had felt to Ashleigh. Not when it happened, and not any time since. "I've been thinking about it a lot."

He was right, of course. They both knew what her answer would have been. Now, her answer was different, and that terrified her because she still didn't know what she was hoping to achieve by taking the risk. What would a relationship even look like for someone like her? She didn't know, but there was really only one way to find out. For that, she needed him to take her as seriously as she always took everything, even if it was just for five minutes, just long enough to tell her that he'd always been joking, that he had no interest in her. Getting Axel to be serious wasn't something Ashleigh really knew how to do. She'd managed it once, by having a panic attack, but she wasn't so unhealthy that she would force that.

It took a moment before it came to her, but when it did it was blindingly obvious. "Axel." She said it as she turned, her next sentence all planned out in her head. Her next sentence never happened because Axel, as always, couldn't be predicted. "Where -" She didn't need to finish the question, because she could see his shirt on the floor, some distance from the tiling area. "Why?" It wasn't as if it was the first time she'd seen him shirtless - shared shared a common room with him for seven years and she was in and out of Panquake house almost as if she lived there herself. It was a little different now, but mostly it was inconvenient because she was still trying to have a serious conversation!

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

nomoreclothes
2016-05-18 08:11 pm UTC (link)

It hadn't felt like a joke because it hadn't been, not at its core. Sure, it was said in a joking manner, because those were the types of questions expected of someone like him, but he'd been genuinely interested in the answer. Axel only pretended it was all a big joke because it was easier to protect himself that way. If everything was a joke, then nothing could hurt him. He would never admit to that bit of psychology, but it was still the truth nonetheless.

But he was also curious as to why she was fixating on it. It didn't make much sense. Ashleigh had made it very clear how she felt about any sort of change to their current relationship, and he didn't want to push her too much, not about something serious. Things that didn't matter, sure, no big deal. But this? This was important. He knew that, he just...well, he wouldn't be Axel if he wasn't always trying to take the pressure out of an important moment.

"Why not?" he asked in return, a grin now on his face. Random nudity was his favorite kind of nudity, after all. "Everyone needs a little random nudity in their lives."

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

demipointe
2016-05-18 11:19 pm UTC (link)

Ashleigh could have disagreed about her need for random nudity, or she could have insisted he put his shirt back on. She did neither. Instead, she frowned at him in silence for an uncomfortably long moment. Was this part of the joke, an attempt to irritate her into an amusing reaction? Or had Axel envisioned this playing out like a romance novel where she would be overcome with desire at the sight of him? (If so, he had tragically miscast his leading lady.) Or, worse, was he tempting her to show a little vulnerability in order to laugh at her for ever thinking it could be reciprocated? Ashleigh didn't really believe that, but the thought coiled uneasily in her stomach all the same. For years she'd thought she understood this back-and-forth between them, but questioning her own feelings and motivation left her equally uncertain of his.

"What do I have to do to get you to be serious for one minute?" She asked. If this were a romance novel she suspected she would stride across the room and kiss him - a thought she entertained for barely a second. It wouldn't accomplish anything. She had always been confident that Axel's physical compliments were genuine. What she wanted to know was whether that was all there was, and whether he reciprocated a kiss or not wasn't going to tell her that. The only thing that was going to help was actually talking. And even that was useless if she couldn't get him to listen.

She rested the pads of two fingers on the hollow of her throat, feeling the steady heartbeat that reminded her the rapid fluttering vibration in her chest was just imagination. If she was going to get him to pay attention, she had to say something he couldn't misinterpret, put her cards on the table in exactly the way she most wanted to avoid. She shied away from words like 'girlfriend' or 'relationship' because they were completely outside her area of expertise. "I just want to know -" What if Axel knew what she was trying to say, and this was his attempt to divert the conversation before she could say something irrevocable? But, she reassured herself, there was no way he could know. She barely knew herself and she'd been living with the thoughts for weeks.

"Do you actually want something more than sex?" She took a small step towards him. "Because I do. And if you don't, I've made a mistake bringing it up and we should just - pretend it didn't happen." Like they always did, when things got too fraught.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

nomoreclothes
2016-05-19 09:12 pm UTC (link)

The grin started to fade the longer she stared at him, but he also didn't know how to get back to her question. She could rest assured that he wasn't taking this as a joke anymore, not since she'd brought it back up and was clearly not joking about it either. Axel used jokes as a defense mechanism, but if she wasn't joking, but he was hoping that since she'd fixated, he wouldn't need any. (And he would never laugh at hers or anyone else's feelings like that, he wasn't completely terrible.)

A funny little quip was on the tip of his tongue when she continued and got right to the point, effectively silencing him. No, he didn't have any idea what she was going to say, not in a hundred years would he have guessed that, not from Ashleigh. He probably looked confused, because that was what he felt. He didn't dare let himself feel happy or excited yet, it was far too early in what was probably going to be a very enlightening conversation, to say the least.

"You do?" It seemed very out of the blue, but maybe all of his comments, and the semi-serious conversations finally made her actually consider it. Which he couldn't even be upset about, no matter how emotional and awkward those conversations had been, or how vulnerable it had made him feel. Not if it was actually making her talk about whether or not they were actually going to do this.

But first he needed to say something, didn't he.

"I--yeah, I do, actually." She wanted serious, so serious was what she got. Axel could have made a big romantic gesture (or even a small) one, and he wanted so badly to kiss her--if she wanted more than sex from him, then she would probably be receptive to it, at least--but he didn't. Part of him was still scared. Ashleigh was a force to be reckoned with, and he loved her. He was afraid because she could ruin him if he wasn't careful, and he wanted to make sure she knew exactly what she was saying, what she wanted, before he made any romantic gestures.

(Reply to this) (Parent)

(Read comments) -