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CHAMBERS, samara b. (tracelines) wrote in pandorarpg,
@ 2011-12-26 13:44:00

Entry tags:

!status: complete, ^date: november 09 2003, character: elijah chambers, character: samara capper

Characters: Elijah Chambers & Samara Chambers
Setting: Chambers home, 9 November 2003, 10:21am
Rating: General Public
Summary: Discussing how to deal with the nightmare-memories and revealing long-kept secrets.

Regardless of how frightened she may have been the day before when she had the run-in with Zarkin Frood, the fact remained that he had given her valuable information about these 'nightmares' that she could use to get her and her family somewhere further along in solving the entire mystery. She and Eli might not be on the best terms at the moment, but that didn't rightly matter because he would put it aside if it meant working on something intellectual—she knew him well enough for that. And maybe none of that really mattered anymore because right now this was what was most important: compiling what they already knew and finding out what else they needed to figure out to solve this matter once and for all.

Eli's part was essential though, because of his access at the Ministry, so she would need his help. She needed to find out what he had already researched on this matter anyhow and amass it with her own knowledge so that they could converge on the same road and stop with all this 'need to know' shite because she had a family to protect and she didn't have time to wait around on her husband and his ideals of when he thought he was ready to let her in on his secrets. This was one that she wasn't going to wait on, whether he was okay with it or not, he would just have to deal with that.

Samara walked into his study, where he always was, with Argus close at hand, and dropped the few books and newspapers she had pulled onto the other end of his desk by the open seat. "Pandora Zurlo," she said simply as she sat herself down in the seat and greeted the golden retriever who walked over to her as she had entered the room.

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skittish
2011-12-28 08:17 pm UTC (link)

It was an interesting comparison to hear Jason make. Were he and Samara similar to Grindelwald and Pandora? From what history said he couldn't be sure of their exact relationship, but Eli loved Samara with everything he could. Absent minded, he rubbed his thumb over his tattoo on his ring finger. Eli already suspected that Samara would go to any length she could for something that mattered to her and his was move driven by the desire to know.

There was a fine line between greatness and madness, and Eli had often found men like Grindelwald to be largely misunderstood geniuses - so perhaps they weren't so different after all.

"That's right," he said agreeing, "I would never let anything happened to your mum or to you. And she is having some rather scary nightmares that are upsetting." Eli leaned forward as if to tell his son a secret because in some ways it was. "And I have been having them too, which worried me a little. So I'm going to need you to be extra good, brave and brilliant for us. Do you think you could do that?"

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tracelines
2011-12-30 12:48 am UTC (link)

Jason pulled a face at Eli, one that said his father was obviously being a bit stupid. It was a face Samara had seen on Eli many times before, and she couldn't help but stifle a laugh because the similarity was remarkable. "Da, do you really need to ask? I've already started brewing polyjuice potion, I think I can handle Mum's mood swings."

"Jason!" Samara declared, looking aghast, but the boy just grinned up at her. "You'll be lucky if I don't take that potion away from you."

"Awww Mum, I want to use it!" Jase started whinging, sounding more like a little kid again.

She shook her head. "Do you have any questions about any of this, love?"

"Is Uncle Benji coming over for tea?" the boy asked, disregarding her question altogether.

"Jase," Samara said in a warning tone.

Jason sighed over-dramatically at her. "If you and Da don't get rid of the nightmares, someone might try to kill the both of you like they did the others?" He looked over at Eli for confirmation.

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skittish
2011-12-30 02:59 am UTC (link)

Eli reached over and messed Jason's hair. While an affectionate gesture, it was still something that riled the boy a little, which was exactly what he intended for exchange with his mother. It also gave him a moment to look at Samara and gauge how he should answer that question as opposed to how he was going to answer.

However, it came down to the fact that Jason was too smart to lie to. Samara wanted him to be innocent, Eli didn't want him to think it was worse than it was because dad wouldn't tell him the truth.

"That could happen, but I am a very smart man and your mum, she's pretty smart too. And we aren't going to let that happen - neither of us are going to die anytime soon." It probably wasn't what Samara would have said, but it was a milder version of what he might have told Jason without an audience. "Which is why I need to ask because it's going to take some work and probably more of your mum's mood swings."

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tracelines
2011-12-30 03:28 am UTC (link)

"Jason looked at her. "I think there's a potion for those."

"Alright, I've heard just about enough of these so-called mood swings from the two of you," Samara said, though she had a small smile playing on her lips as she set Jason back down on the floor. "If you have any other questions come ask us, okay?"

"Yes Mum. Is Uncle Benji coming over for tea?" Jase asked again, looking impatient this time.

"I don't know what his plans are. Floo him and ask, love. And don't use so much powder this time!" she called after him as he ran from the room.

Samara turned back around and leaned on his desk, looking thoughtful. "So there is one other possibility that we could try, though I'm weary of the idea seeing as there is obviously other magic at work on these memories and side affects could come into play, but it might still be worth pursuing if other options turn up little results. So we might consider attempting to obliterate the memory itself like you would any other normal memory." Though this wasn't a fix either. Memory charms could be reversed with strong enough magic, but it was still something to try, even if the subject brought a bitter taste to her mouth when she spoke of it. Just thinking of pointing her wand at her husband and saying those words again was almost unbearable, but if it were something that might save him, she'd rise above her own discomfort, like she was attempting to do now by talking about it, albeit with a bit of fidgeting.

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skittish
2011-12-30 05:24 am UTC (link)

Eli leaned back in his chair, listening for Eli to be well out of earshot before he even began to consider the question. He had just told his son they were going to work to solve the issue at hand, he might as well get to that. "I have considered the possibility." He hadn't gone so far as to try it himself set, because while he might know a great about memories, having both the theoretical and practical skill to manipulate them in strange and fascinating new ways - sometimes you just needed someone well-practiced with the basic ability.

"However, the memory cannot be extracted by normal means, and it doesn't seem likely that it can be duplicated properly." And he had tried, numerous times even with other memories just to make sure that he hadn't done it wrong. "So, I am not sure what effect that any attempt to obliviate the memory might cause." Eli swallowed, for the first time feeling like he was standing on true uncertain ground, but the question was already formed. "You've been out of practice for some time, would you be able to successfully perform such a charm?"

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tracelines
2011-12-30 05:58 am UTC (link)

Samara nodded at his counter argument. "I agree with you on that - the true ramifications are unknown until we actually try it. It's possible that nothing at all will happen because of the other magic that is involved, or it might dislodge that magic and have a negative effect, or vice versa and give us a more positive effect. It's hard to tell without knowing the other magic surrounding the memory."

She shouldn't have been very surprised when he asked of her practice with memory charms. After five years she had expected that he would have figured something out of the sort. Whether he really knew or not she was not certain, but she could tell that he was fishing for information. At least this she could answer honestly enough since she performed the charm on Eli only a few months after she quit her training. "It has been a little over five years now since I last performed a memory charm, but I was well within my rights at becoming one of the best Obliviators that the Ministry had currently employed so I don't doubt my abilities, even without daily practice. Do you?"

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skittish
2011-12-30 05:18 pm UTC (link)

"Doubt your abilities?" He asked not really needing the confirmation, but five years was a long time even for someone who might have been on her way to becoming one of the best. However, that wasn't the point. Maybe he was fishing for information, but that meant taking a risk and putting himself out there. It wouldn't the first time he did so.

"If I did, I wouldn't be asking you if you would be willing to try and obliviate the nightmare-memory in my head." It was a simple indirect ask, but Eli imagined it held a lot more weight than the words allowed. He might not have actually known, but he had a notion. Samara was keeping something from him, there had been something wrong with his own head for few years now, but were those two related? And did he really want to know the answer?

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tracelines
2011-12-30 08:34 pm UTC (link)

Samara merely nodded, not sure that she should say anything else on the subject. She could feel the air shifting in the room around her, feel the tension just by the mere mention of memory charms and she didn't like it. Maybe it was all in her own head, but either way, she didn't want to risk getting into this area of conversation like she had the other night. The last thing she wanted was another argument, especially when they hadn't entirely finished with the last one.

"Eli-" she began, but she just didn't know where she was planning to go with this. She didn't know what she had been about to say, but decided to go with an apology. "I'm sorry about the other night. I know I've been a bit difficult to deal with this past week and I want to thank you for being so patient with me and being there every morning when I wake up from these nightmares." Samara reached across his desk to take one of his hands in hers. "I guess I have been having some mood swings. I'm sorry about all of this." What exactly all of this entailed she didn't explain, but she could mean it to include quite a few things if she wanted.

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skittish
2012-01-01 02:13 am UTC (link)

"Okay," he said carefully. Eli had only been joking about the mood swings with Jase because it was an easier way to talk about a difficult situation. He didn't honestly believe that she was having any sort of mood swings - at least not ones that were unexpected. More importantly, he didn't like that she was apologizing for the other night, not in place of answering the almost question he posed. Not when he felt it was the thing that hung in that delicate balance between them. They had entered into new territory the other day with the fight, they were back here again now.

Eli didn't shake her hand off his, but he made no move to acknowledge it. No, he was onto something else. He had always been something of a singularly focused man and now when it was so close he couldn't just let this go, even if it could be better for him to do so. "But that doesn't answer the question, would you be willing to obliviate the nightmare memory from my head?"

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tracelines
2012-01-01 02:29 am UTC (link)

Samara felt herself teetering on the edge of losing her cool again but she was trying not to do that. She didn't want to go down that road again and she had a feeling that if she did, she might give too much away. Still, she couldn't stop herself from squeezing his hand reflexively in response before she removed her hands altogether. She didn't like this. It felt like a challenge and she didn't know what answer was going to throw him toward the wrong conclusions. It didn't rightly matter, though, because she'd already vowed to tell him the truth so she'd just have to deal with whatever he decided to decipher from this.

Samara looked him dead in the eye and replied, "Yes, Eli. I would do absolutely anything for you, you know that."

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skittish
2012-01-03 12:43 am UTC (link)

He didn't doubt that for a second. Eli knew with every ounce of his being that what she said was true - Samara would do anything for him, for their family no matter what that would entail. "Good," he said finally not sure he wanted to chase that line of thought any further just yet.

"But before I let you take a wand to my head to go after that memory, like you said, we do need to know more about how it works, because it really is like nothing I've ever encountered." He sat back in his chair, gaze shifting toward the cabinet where he has tucked his pensieve away before she came in. It wasn't entirely giving away the game because he kept a few different things for his projects in there.

"I mean it's not mine, but it quite honestly does seem like a natural memory, and unless someone out there is smarter than I am, which not to be immodest, but I highly doubt that, it would have to be some sort of dead man's or dead woman's memory as the case might be, but how to insert them and on such a scale?" Unfortunately, Eli didn't have access to any dead man's memories that he could tinker with and not have to carefully report it to the Department. And he didn't think it would be quite so productive to take someone's memories and kill them just to see what he could do - although he did briefly consider it.

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tracelines
2012-01-03 01:42 am UTC (link)

Samara thought for a moment that things were moving on, that she could relax and she did. This was a mistake she couldn't make again. This was a mistake she could never make around him again while they were discussing these memories that were now in their minds that didn't belong to them because the next thing she did was such an obvious give-away that she might as well have told him everything right then and there. When he mentioned dead people's memories Samara's eyes went wide and she looked away from him and down at her hands. It took her a moment to recover from it, because she just hadn't expected this line of talk and it was stupid of her not to, but there it was. She was getting soft after five years; this stupid memory that wasn't hers was ruining everything and she needed it out, dammit.

In one of their earlier plans, Samara and Elijah Senior had considered not modifying Eli's memory at all but rather modifying Elijah Senior's memory so that it would work well enough to be placed into Eli's head once Elijah Senior was dead. Which obviously meant that Elijah Senior would have to kill himself at some point in order for the plan to work. But after they considered it long enough (and they did seriously consider it for a while, for it meant Samara didn't actually have to perform any magic on Eli's mind) the technicalities became much too great for the two of them. Elijah Senior would still need to get convicted for Eli's crimes - it was easier just to do it the way they did.

Not to mention Eli might not have access to any dead man's memories, but Samara now did. She still had Elijah senior's original memories of his research project during the time of the war (as well as Eli's memory of his real research project which he had removed because he knew he'd be going to Azkaban for it and was making a failsafe, which Samara stole) stored in her family's vault in Gringotts along with a few other memories Elijah Senior had included for the time when Eli did figure all this out. Both he and Samara had known it would not last forever.

This would be something they could use, except that she couldn't tell him any of this, because why would Elijah Senior give these extra memories to Samara instead of just giving them to his son before he went to Azkaban? And why would Samara not have given them to him five years ago if not? However, she could create approximate similar memories of her own to experiment with if she had enough information to go by. But she would still probably need Eli's help in the end with the experimentation, which begged the question: if she was willing to do anything to save her family, did that include breaking it if it came down to that? Would she just tell Eli about all of it if giving him these memories might save their lives even if the fallout was losing him? She knew that Jason needed his father and if it meant her losing Eli well-she might have to do it for the both of them.

She looked up at Eli again after that moment and said as strongly as she could without looking away from him because it was key that she not give it away yet, "I can try to recreate it. The memory - it's easier for Obliviators to make false memories when we've got a real memory to work off of and obviously we've seen this one with quite a lot of detail, so I can try to recreate it for someone else. We can put it in someone else's head and see what happens. Make them think they've been having these nightmares every night and see if they keep having them or if they develop the spot because of it."

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skittish
2012-01-03 02:40 am UTC (link)

He noticed her hesitation at the mention of a dead man's memories. She had some and first reaction was jealously, followed by the curiosity to want to know who those memories belonged to and why she was keeping them from him. Only once he reached that conclusion, he felt that it might also be connected to what was wrong in his own dead.

"And I could probably do it better," he said sort of offhandedly. "If we want to see how the memory works with other people, you have to create something as close to the real thing as possible, you might be good at fabricating that, but I could make something very close to the real thing." After all, that had been part of his plan, to not have to worry about death or worse losing his mind, he had started to create back ups. At the beginning they were never quite good enough, he could still tell it was real, it didn't have enough of the nuances. However, recently he was able create replicas of his own memories with 90 percent accuracy. That wasn't something needed for comparably simpler obliviation, which was more of an art where his was a science.

"Because the average person might not be able to tell, but false memories can be recognized as different by an individual and as you know don't quite work the same." In an indirect way, he was telling her that he knew. Or that at least he had an idea. Even as they were scheming to try to put these nightmare-memories into someone else's head, he was calling her on the unspoken game between them.

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tracelines
2012-01-03 03:16 am UTC (link)

Samara was worried now. He knew more than she had ever thought which stood to reason that he had been working with memory in the Department so he could probably tell quite a lot about it all by now. If he was able to create false memories better than she was there wasn't much she could hold over him now in the memory area. Why of all things would he have been assigned to memories?

"Since when?" she asked, not that it truly mattered. She was stalling for time because she couldn't decide if she should delay further or just give in now. She knew that she'd given away too much already. She knew that things were going downhill and at this rate she was better to just tell him and get it over with than to bother with trying to lie anymore. But after lying for five years it was difficult just to tell finally. She'd spent more of their marriage with this secret than without it.

Samara wasn't going to give up yet. She wasn't going to just let him win, not until he made it abundantly clear that he knew what she had done, even if his last statement was an obvious suspicion on her part. She continued to stare at him and replied, "Considering that most people we have available to work with are going to be just average and nothing like, say you, I don't really see the problem with just a false memory. If you want to use your memory creation skill though go right ahead, I'd love to see. I had no idea you'd become so...proficient."

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