Okay, what in the blue hell is this shit? I was looking at a sweet bike online when this thing came on.

"...seven people have been injured, one critically, in downtown Seattle today, as an impromptu zombie-themed flash mob at Carl Anderson Park was rocked by the explosions of at least three pipe bombs. Eyewitnesses report that the gathering had been under way for only a few minutes when a group of three men, disguised in bloody face masks and camouflage clothing, threw the bombs into the crowd, where they exploded. The suspects then fled on foot in the direction of Howell Street. The man closest to the explosions has been identified as Chase Woods, 29, a possibly-homeless man known to frequent the area. Woods was transported to Harbor View Medical Center where he remains in critical condition; six others sustained minor injuries and were treated at the scene. Police are continuing their investigation tonight, but at this time they have no motive for the attack. However, some witnesses claim that the bombs seemed to be deliberately aimed at Woods himself. Anyone who has any possible information on the suspects is urged to contact..."

Wishing everybody a happy International Beer Day!

Heading on my way back to Washington; it's been slow going, but I took the time out to celebrate with an impromptu party in a field somewhere in Idaho. Ran into a couple of guys with a six-pack, and it turned into something like two hundred people showing up, with more than enough beer for everybody.

(By the way: That news story about the missing liquor distributor truck that was last seen in the area? Yeah, that was totally not my doing. Seriously.)

(he just happened to show up, I can't help it if I can't turn away anyone who brings drinks)

(and it's not like anyone FORCED him to wear the go-go boots, anyhow)

(and he said he had a great time anyway, so there)

Okay, so, everyone who got a strange visitor lately... Show of hands? Tell me it wasn't just me?

I don't know how much longer the battery on this thing is going to hold out, and I don't know if the cops are still prowling around here, so I'll try to keep it short. I should have kept going west, not cut south-- did you know there's places around here where you can't get anything stronger than pop? I call that criminal.
I found this out the hard way when I walked into this restaurant and tried to order a beer. The staff pulled all kinds of attitude on me and told me that this was a family establishment and they didn't hold with spirituous liquors and all that-- and that's when things started to go really wrong, because one guy off in the corner started shouting "It's him! I saw him on the news-- the fornication and the drunkenness-- he's one of Them!"
I never heard anyone that was able to capitalize spoken words, especially when yelling them. Cross that one off my bucket list, I guess.
I shit you not, every single person in that restaurant was lined up facing me, shoulder to shoulder like some kind of football line-- or battle line. I tried to calm them down with a joke or something, but I couldn't get a word out before they pushed, literally pushed me back out the front doors and shoved me down in the parking lot. The owner told me I was going to get what was coming to me, "you and all your ungodly friends!" And that's when the police cars showed up, and I ran like hell.
I'm in a ditch and I have no idea where in the name of Uranus' ballsack I am, but I noticed something strange-- every single car in that parking lot had this little sticker on the back bumper or the back window. It looked kind of like a cross with hands and it said "Foundation for

[Your battery is now at 0%. This device is currently saving your post and shutting down. Please plug in your charger to use this device.]

You know, once you get past the age of 21, birthdays become a lot less fun.

I won't lie. I wish Nina and Jonah could be here.

Okay, so I want to know who this is and what you want with me. Obviously, you’re some tech-heavy underground group, because I have never seen coding like this before. And I’ve played inside some very intricate software.

So just to be clear, unless you plan on offering me a lot of money, I’m not interested in being recruited to whatever this is. I pick my own career. So if that ruins your plans, then too bad. Stop hounding me.

[The first thing visible is Tanner's smile, as he's a little too close to the camera, still trying to adjust it as it blinks on. He bites his lip for a moment, looking for the little light indicating that it is indeed on, and once he finds it, he gently settles himself back into his computer chair.]

Hi. [He smiles, shyly. His face overtaken with a hint of pink.] I'm Tanner. You might know me as...[He stops, and worries his lip between his teeth a little, looking decently self conscious by now.] Ganymede.

I've looked through the other posts here and some of them are really-[He stops again, and just shakes his head.] Um. But...I think I kind of get the gist of this place? I'm not sure. [He shrugs.] But I figured I'd make a video post, because I...don't think I'd know how to introduce myself just typing. [There's a bit of a giggle.] It doesn't...carry tone well, you know? And I wanted to be friendly.

So, hi! [He waves, and smiles brightly at the camera, before winking, and cutting the feed.]

Fucking shit. If they've gotten sentient enough to start sending me e-mails, I think I'm fucked.

tHeRe. I played along. I did the registering thing. I posted. Now please, stop.

Wonderful. Just when I thought that they were going to try and get back to important issues... A bill is being proposed now that would require all of us to register ourselves as godlings. With our names, addresses, and powers. So the entire world would know who we are, where we live and what we can do.

I promise, I'm doing what I can to fight it.

Uhmm... Hello? So, I got this email, and here I am.
I don't know if I've missed a worldwide memo here or something, because I have no idea what this is. I mean, I get a lot of anonymous mail—you know, fan mail, proposals, and such—but this is creeping me out more than usual. I must have also missed some technological advancement, since I'm pretty sure printers had to be turned on before they spewed out papers.

Just to make things clear, I'm Nathaniel Gallagher, age 21, male model yes, contain your orgasms.
Again, if anyone could kindly explain the situation, I'd be very much entitled to rewarding someone with a nice dinner or a glass of wine.

[Something had called him back to Brooklyn. It wasn't a clear voice, or even a compulsion-- but after all the holiday weirdness, something in him wanted to see how things looked where he'd come from. Besides, he'd been curious for a while to see how the old bar was getting along.

And so it came to pass that Dionysus found himself squatting on the sidewalk, an unattended laptop open in front of him, as he read the cryptic note on the messageboard. He puzzled over it briefly-- but the first rays of sun brought illumination in several meanings.

He stretched in the sunlight, his clothes falling away, and found a wreath of grape leaves in his hand. Catching his reflection in a window, he put the wreath on his head, settling it just right, and grinned like a lunatic.

THIS was more like it.

There were things to do, scores to settle, of course-- but the important things had to be done first. He strode into Gambrinus' Hole, pushing the doors wide open like a cowboy in a western; even at sunrise, the place had its share of loafers, drunks, artists, and misfits.

He spread his arms wide, and in a voice rich with power, said "Free your minds, and your asses will follow." With a magician's pass, his hands were full of cups of wine, which he handed to everyone who walked up to him.

Leading his half-formed parade out into the street, he passed by the laptop on the sidewalk. Yes, he had things to do, but he couldn't resist a messageboard post: A crudely drawn, crudely grinning figure, followed by a single line of text.]

u mad bros?

I've returned to New York for the time being, now that finals are over. I don't know how long I'll be staying, since the sooner I get to Michigan, the better.

Hey, everyone! Brothers and sisters and all the rest!

Things are seriously awesome down here at the dorms! Everyone's invited! Can't wait to see you all here! ♥

[The roof of an abandoned warehouse, decrepit and falling in on itself.

Dionysus could feel the power flowing into him, as he walked across the open space. He could almost taste it in the air, as the rooftop wind gusted against his naked body, so much like the air before a bad storm. Well, that part was true enough, he supposed.

Padding close to the edge of the roof, he looked down over the city. So many tiny, boring lives down there-- slaves to routine, to duty, to obligation, and all of them absolutely terrified at losing control. And yet, tonight, he could almost see their life force, glittering beautiful like electric dew just before the dawn.

It's good to face your fears, he thought to the people out there. If you think about it, I'm really doing you a favor all along.

Tilting his head back, he raised his arms, a huge jug of wine held in each hand. Lifting the jugs high, he poured streams of wine mostly into his mouth, but quite a lot splashed over his face and the rest of his body.

He swallowed and shook his head vigorously. Droplets of wine flew from the tips of his hair into the dark. Taking a deep breath, he let loose with a barbaric yawp that echoed over the neighborhood-- to him, it almost sounded like a thunderclap.]

I think this weekend is going to be absolutely epic.

Bloody hell. Just saw the news. First the little miss down by the fish market, and now a bar burning to the ground with all the patrons still inside...

Oh, brother of mine, just what is it you're up to?

[Email to Dionysus]

Hey. Some strange things happening lately. I don't suppose you know anything about them?

I never thought I'd say this, but I feel like going back to Philly. Haven't been there since I left, but I get the feeling that I'd like it a hell of a lot better now.

Those folks are partying HARDCORE out there.

Since I refuse to play the stupid game of who would fuck who, I'll pose this question.

Who would you kill and how?

Ok, ladies. The boys have had their fun. Now it's our turn.

Which of the men here would you be most interested in and why?

Personally, I like the best of the best, the cream of the crop, the total package of wealth, good looks, power and a certain je ne sais quoi, so it shouldn't be of any surprise that I favor both Poseidon and Odin.