Freddie Barker (h2odrops) wrote in light_of_may, @ 2009-07-15 04:48:00 |
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Entry tags: | 2009-06-08 |
Kiss me, oh kiss me
Who: Freddie and Rhys
When: not sure, but it's late evening
Where: Text messages and then outside Rhys' house.
Retrieving her cell phone from her messenger bag, Freddie didn't bother to dry up the tears that wouldn't stop falling before beginning to tap furiously away at the keypad. The screen was blurry by the tears falling onto it, but that didn't stop Freddie or slow her down. She needed this text message to be delivered fast, so she could get to Rhys as fast as she could:
I hope you really mean what you said about being there for me all the time because shit just kinda got real and really shitty really fast, and I need you. I wouldn't bother you if I didn't really feel like shit. I'll come to you, where are you? Love, Freddie.
Without waiting for an answer Freddie stood to her feet, wiped the tears from her face and left her room, darting down the stairs faster than ever before. Even Mrs. Krause randomly appearing on the hallway that lead to the front door of the house didn't stop Freddie from walking right out and jumping into her brand new and conveniently convertible car, sliding the keys into the ignition furiously as she placed her cell phone on the dashboard. She decided to drive around while Rhys didn't text her back. Anything but that house. Anything at all.
Rhys was in the process of working on his latest song when the first few bars of "Brown Eyed Girl" by Van Morrison started to play from his pocket. Freddie. He picked his phone up immediately and read what she wrote in her text message, his eyebrows knit together in concern.
I'm at home right now. Go ahead and come over, alright? You're never ever a bother, Freddie. Love, Rhys.
He set his phone down, his stomach starting to churn a bit. He really hoped she was okay. If someone made her cry, he would have to whoop some serious ass, because nobody made his Freddie cry, dammit. He set his acoustic guitar next to his bass and sat back on his bed. He had a bad feeling.
It was lucky that she was stopped at a red light when Rhys' text arrived, because in the mood she was now, she probably wouldn't have stopped to read it otherwise. With a deep sigh, she set the phone back on the dashboard and sped off to Rhys' house. But she wasn't coming over. She couldn't bear being indoors at the moment, much less at a house where parents weren't dipshits. Instead of parking, getting out and ringing the doorbell, Freddie stopped on the road by Rhys' house and pressed the horn a couple of times. Hopefully he'd get that it was her, and he'd come outside. However, just in case, she texted him back saying it was her outside, before doing some more light crying and wondering exactly how she'd been capable of driving all this time without some sort of minor accident.
He jumped at the sound of the horn and peeked out the window to see who it was. Then he got her text. He put his shoes on quickly and shut the door to his room before he ran out to her car. The sight of her tears was enough to undo him. He opened the car door and sat inside, his arms going around her immediately. Yes, things were definitely bad. "Freddie?" He whispered her name, his hand stroking her hair. "What happened?"
The minute she felt his arms around her it was like something broke inside Freddie and she burst into tears, crying loudly in Rhys' shoulder. She wouldn't even try to speak at the moment, because she knew it would be senseless sniveling babble that neither her nor Rhys could possibly hope to understand. But of course just having him here was an improvement on her mood; it was just her mood that was at an all time low, along with her self-esteem and her mental health at the moment. And somehow seeing Rhys and feeling his arms around her had worked like some sort of prompt for release. For a good five minutes Freddie just cried, grabbing onto Rhys as if to dear life.
Rhys held on tightly to her, protectively. Whatever caused her this much grief would have to deal with him now. He gently kissed the top of her head, letting her lean on him and cry however much she needed to. His heart broke at the sight of her so distraught. Gently, he smoothed his hand down her back in a soothing gesture. Aqua eyes darkened in anger. Hurting Freddie was absolutely unacceptable to him and someone was going to pay.
Still sort of convulsing from the sobbing, Freddie pulled away a little bit and tried to dry her very own river of tears. Rhys deserved some sort of explanation as to why exactly she was laying all this on him right now, and she sighed, before giving it to him. "So my drunken mother decided to blame me for my brother's death today." She said simply, tears still running down her face. She felt the worst she had felt in weeks.
When she reached up to dry her tears, he followed suit, brushing them away with his fingertips. "Oh, Freddie..." His eyes softened as he kissed her temple. "That's not your fault. She is so full of shit." No wonder she was so upset. He continued to brush the tears away, wishing he could do more. Rhys knew what happened to Razzie and he knew that Freddie took it the hardest. So the fact that her mother would use that against her was inexcusable. He was trying his best not to get too upset, because that was the last thing that Freddie needed right then.
With a sigh, Freddie shrugged and looked away. "I don't know, maybe she's right. Maybe I should have stopped him from partying so much, maybe I should have stopped him from climbing up to that board, it was dangerous enough that he did that." Trying very hard not to burst out crying again, she looked back at Rhys. "My father's love is contained within this expensive new car of mine, and my mother thinks I'm kind of a murderer. I feel so loved today." Then, only then, Freddie started crying again.
His heart wrenched at her words. "Freddie. If you had known or had the tiniest of an inkling about what was going to happen to Razzie, you would have done something. It was an accident and no one saw it coming. That is in no way your fault. Don't let your mother peg the blame on you." He hugged her tightly and kissed the tears off of her cheeks. The urge to take her far away from this place was strong. Maybe they could leave just the two of them. He swore to himself that he would never make her cry. That was when he said it in a surge of bravery. "I love you, Freddie. Fuck everybody else. I love you completely and utterly."
Freddie sighed again. Maybe Rhys was the one who was right. "I just...This whole time I thought under all that booze and depression my mother still loved me, you know? I thought she still felt a little bit of affection towards me, even under all that shit she's got going on." But she didn't, apparently. Freddie knew all too well the cruelty of a drunk's truth, so to speak, so she knew her mother probably meant what she had said. "Not only that, she blames me for the divorce. Those two kind of went hand-in-hand in her screaming fit." And all she had wanted to do was tell her mom how happy she was because of Rhys. All she wanted to do was share her happiness.
She heard Rhys say those words while biting at her nails nervously, and although she knew this was a very happy occasion, something very, very good for her, Freddie couldn't help another stream of tears from falling down her cheeks. It was sadness mixed with happiness, and it felt nothing if not weird. Pulling Rhys by the shoulders she wrapped her arms around him as tightly as she could, without saying a word. Despite her first thought being that he was only saying this because he'd been lead to it by what she had said first, Freddie knew Rhys wasn't that kind of person. It was unlikely that he would say things without meaning them, especially important things like this. And Freddie appreciated that he shared her sentiment of 'fuck everybody else'; she felt like that a lot of the time.
"She blames you because she can't take responsibility for her own actions. I promise you, none of that is your fault. She's the one in the wrong. She was the one who wasn't there when you needed her. Instead, she drinks and blames everything on you. That's not fair." Rhys said as he smoothed her hair out of her face. It pissed him off that her mother could be such a bad parent. You didn't put your problems on your children, regardless of how bad you hurt inside. He had no sympathy for those that took their pain out on everyone else around them. Freddie's mother was no exception. She didn't deserve to go through something like this.
When he noticed the tears rolling down her cheeks, he leaned forward and kissed the apple of her cheek before he wiped them away. "I swear to you that I will never ever hurt you like that, Freddie. I won't do that to you. I promise." And he would keep that promise. He would protect her and keep her safe from as much as he could because he loved her and wanted her to be happy.