InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "Look, a distraction!"

Jessica Vaisey (littlevaisey) wrote in landing_rpg,
@ 2009-05-25 13:23:00

WHO. Evan Pucey and Jessica Vaisey
WHAT. They needed to talk.
WHERE. Slytherin Boys' Dormitories
WHEN. After class.
RATING. TBA
STATUS. Incomplete / Closed

The recent days had never felt quite so long and cold. But that day, Jessica was hoping that she could somehow relieve herself with what burden she's been carrying with the chance to talk things over with Evan. She missed him quite a lot, and though her time had been spent with Hugo, a boy who had been nothing but amazing to her, she still couldn't feel ultimately happy. Not with what had happened with her and Evan, she couldn't. Her smiles, though given with sincerity, can't seem to reach her eyes, and she was sometimes afraid Hugo would take notice of the. If he has, he has not said a word to her. She was grateful for it.

With a fist clenching in her chest, Jessic a climbed the boys' dormitories to Evan's room. Upon reaching his door, she hesitated before lifting her hand to knock lightly on the hard wooden surface and twisting the door knob. "Evan?" she called out in her small voice. "Are... you there?"

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littlevaisey
2009-06-01 10:35 am UTC (link)

Jessica's hands closed into fists behind her as she listened to Evan speak. Even though she has spent perhaps the entire day readying herself for the worst things that he could say, it was nothing compared to truly hearing him speak to her. Did she truly think that a happy ending was meant for her after what she's done? Evan could never see her anything more than a friend, even though she believed now that her feelings for him have been developing for longer than she was aware fo it. Maybe she just had to accept that... "I don't think I can bear the thought of not being your friend. SO I don't think you have to worry about me going anywhere..." she told him truthfully.

"Find someone else soon..." Her eyebrows drew together at the mention of Hugo. She looked at Evan through narrowed eyes, searching his expression for what he could be thinking. "What... are you trying to say?" she asked. Was he implying that he wanted her to be with Hugo?

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evanpucey
2009-06-02 12:21 am UTC (link)

Evan hesitated at her body language. He hadn't thought saying that would upset her. After all, she had been spending an awful lot of time with the Weasley kid since their spat, and he would've thought she would be glad to hear that he had no intentions of keeping her to himself when he was not willing to date her. So why did she look upset?

"Well, you know, he's..." Truthfully, Evan knew next to nothing about Hugo Weasley aside from the fact that he was a Weasley, not a pureblood, and was a prefect. Basically, his polar opposite, which was probably in Jessica's best interest. "Nice?" Suggesting a Weasley was not a pleasant experience. Honestly, uttering the Weasel name in a positive light was like punching himself in the face. "You might... give him a chance or something, you know?"

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littlevaisey
2009-06-02 02:58 am UTC (link)

Jessica was not upset exactly. She felt defeated more than anything, and not too soon after self-pitying consumed her thoughts. She appeared far better than she was feeling however, her expression seemingly calm despite the sadness she felt in her heart.

It was confirmed seconds later that Evan truly was suggesting that she try things out with Hugo. It was quite painful to hear, especially since he knew how she felt about him. He was rejecting her and pushing her to someone else. Sha wanted to tell him that she and Hugo have become good friends, and he's helped her through some difficult times. He was a friend but instead she found herself asking: "Is that what you want me to do, Evan?"

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	evanpucey 2009-06-02 06:47 pm UTC (link)
	Evan sighed. "I don't know what I want you to do, Jessica. I want you to be happy, and if you think that this Weasley kid will do it, then yeah. But I think it's pretty obvious I'm not... the best when it comes to those kinds of decisions." He laughed nervously, not quite meeting her eyes. He hesitated a moment. "I'm sorry I'm not who you thought I was, Jess." (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

littlevaisey
2009-06-03 12:55 pm UTC (link)

The line of Jessica's shoulders thawed when Evan was finished speaking. Her heart sank in her chest, tears threatening to rise on her eyes again, even though that was the last thing she would want to happen in front of him. Before, if there was one person she could freely be herself in front of, it was the boy standing before her. But at this very moment, she could barely hold herself together and already, she was hating herself for appearing so weak.

"Don't apologize, Evan. You didn't change..." It wasn't as if it was a fault of his that he couldn't see her as something more than a friend. "I did." She wanted to tell him that she believed she was going to be happy with him, because she always has been. But she guessed she would hear a response like 'but things are different...' and though she already knew that, she knew she might not be able to handle hearing it out loud. It was all her fault after all. "I guess everything's good then?"

Suddenly, she felt a pressing urge to leave. "I... have to go, so I'll see you?" after a sall wave, Jess turned and was about to head for the door when a thought made her stop. "Can you tell me something though?" She turned so she could look at him. "Does the fact that I'm middle class have anything to do with anything?" She could feel a tightening in her throat, and stinging in her eyes but she tried to keep calm. She was afraid he'd receive this the wrong way, so she continued, more gently: "You can tell me. I'm not going to hold it against you. I just... want to know."

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evanpucey
2009-06-03 01:19 pm UTC (link)

Evan froze at her words, shoulders tensing visibly from the relaxed state they had finally fallen into. He knew exactly where she had heard those words, and the betrayal burned deep in his gut as his hands clenched into fists. "No," he replied, willing his hands to unclench and his muscles to relax. It might have been a white lie. It had a small bit to do with why they weren't dating, but it was not the main reason by any means. "I told you it has nothing to do with you, Jessica, and I can't imagine why anyone would have told you differently." He grabbed his book bag to toss over his shoulder, then thought better of it and through it back on his bed. "I've got to go."

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littlevaisey
2009-06-03 01:56 pm UTC (link)

The moment she saw the change in Evan's demeanor, something in her knew that she should have just kept her mouth shut. Jessica swallowed, her insides knotting painfully as she saw the other's clenched fists, then his attempt to calm himself. Oh, how she wished she could have just walked away.

Without another word, she just turned her back to him and left her heart heavy and broken. She only hoped she hadn't done something that would lead to another horrible thing...

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