InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "I LOVE YOU"

Micah St. Clair (auteur) wrote in gooseberry,
@ 2016-12-07 17:58:00

Entry tags:

! journal, micah st. clair

[GIRL TALK: all sophomore boys except Calvin basically]

OK MEN!!!! After recent events I think we can ALL AGREE that romance is terrifying and confusing???? HOWEVER as we are saps* susceptible to peer pressure and ALSO no longer germy immature freshmen, we must finally BUCK UP and talk about the dragon in the room.

WINTER FORMAL

Sooooo the person I usually ask to dances is this HUGE COMPLICATED THING now and Micah St. Clair does not do COMPLICATED, my friends, and therefore I'm casting my eye elsewhere. But WHICH FINE LADY should I ask????? We gotta do some pre-gaming on who everyone's asking to Winter Formal because A TRUE BRO doesn't ask out his bro's prospective date or anything. So let's talk.

WHO ARE YOU ASKING TO WINTER FORMAL?

Oh yeah I mean we can talk about asking out boys here too???? NBD GUYS THE HETERONORMATIVE TITLING OF THIS WARD IS JUST BC IT'S CATCHY and not bc I want to block you from your heart's desires or whatever.

*Blah blah blah don't lump us all together BLAH BLAH not all of us are huge losers like you Micah BLAH BLAH. Yeah yeah yeah I know some of you are super smooth dudes but that just means you can HELP THE REST OF US with some sage suave advice!!!! And by the rest of us I mean Will because man does Will need help.

[Added after this conversation:]

[Warded to Calvin Evercreech]

HEEEEEEY CALVIN. Sup gi dude.

Ae you staying for Winter Break again?

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Ward

auteur
2016-12-07 08:51 pm UTC (link)

YEAH I'm gonna have to comb my hair or something if we do this???? Which was KIND OF FUN when I was being Norman Bates but when it comes to formal stuff I'm like, do I really want to CONFORM with the system that puts so much EMPHASIS on our PHYSICAL APPEARANCE????? The only way we're all going to be free is if we abandon these flesh costumes.

ANYWAY, you know, it's gonna be... dancing. Someone holding your hand and thinking you look cute. Oh god I'm already CONFORMING but maybe I just want someone to think I'm cute and funny for a night you know?????

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Ward keepmarchingon 2016-12-07 09:00 pm UTC (link)
	I think you're very cute and funny, Micah. You don't need to conform for that. People acknowledge you for who you are and we appreciate having known you for that. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-07 09:02 pm UTC (link)
	yeah. what solo said!! (Reply to this) (Parent)

Ward

auteur
2016-12-07 09:29 pm UTC (link)

THANKS MAN!!!! I think you're all cute and funny too. Except those of you who have REALLY QUESTIONABLE senses of humour but hey haven't we all been there ONCE OR TWICE with a joke that makes everyone go uhhhhhh what?

Anyway I feel like objectively and logically you're right but I dunno why is it that part of me still likes the guy who thinks WHO I AM is just... bad. Or at least he kind of always acts like it's bad?????

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Ward

keepmarchingon
2016-12-07 09:39 pm UTC (link)

~~I mean not really~~

I've been watching Calvin, if that's who you're talking about. Do you want my advice?

I think he thinks you're making fun of him. So I don't think he really sees you the way any of us do. Because everybody came here with their own experiences, and how people treat us shape those experiences. And Calvin hasn't seemed to be treated that nicely during his time here. So he probably uses those experiences to assume that everybody isn't going to treat him very nicely, and what's crueler than pretending to like him when you don't?

I don't think he thinks that who you are is bad, and I don't think he's acting like who you are is bad. I think he thinks that everyone is bad. But that's not a reflection of who you are. It's a reflection of who he believes we all are. So he doesn't hate you, he hates who he believes you are.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Ward

auteur
2016-12-07 09:47 pm UTC (link)

OK so... how do I make it obvious that I'm not making fun of Calvin????? Like I tried being NICER and it kinda felt like we were starting to GET ALONG and then the whole Amortentia thing happened and now I'm like pretty freaking sure he has to 100000% hate me now. Like HOW DO YOU GET BACK FROM THAT??? Romcoms have given me the worst advice here.

Which is where SOLOMON WEBB comes in with the MOST SOLID ADVICE EVER startingggggggg now.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-07 09:51 pm UTC (link)
	calvin doesn't hate you, micah. especially not because of the amortentia thing. ~~he wanted to thank you but he didn't know how. he told me.~~ (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward auteur 2016-12-07 10:07 pm UTC (link)
	Are you sure????? Because I GOTTA SAY if something like happened to me and made me crush on like idk the boy I dislike most, I'd feel awful. I couldn't look at him again????? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-07 10:10 pm UTC (link)
	i'm sure!! i promise. calvin doesn't hate you. (Reply to this) (Parent)

Re: Ward

keepmarchingon
2016-12-07 09:57 pm UTC (link)

My name actually looks really great like that. It makes me feel more pressure to actually give you solid advice and live up to how great my name looks.

I'm not good friends with Calvin. I don't know how his mind works. But I do know that you're not making fun of him, and I do know that that attempt has kind of backfired dramatically. And Amortentia freaked out a lot of people, from what I can only assume, because it was a very vulnerable experience for them. Love makes you vulnerable when it's real. So when it's fake, and you have to live through the repercussions of what you do and say under the belief that you're safely in love, that could create a lot of animosity. I don't know if that's what he's feeling, but it changed how he behaved toward you dramatically, and he probably didn't appreciate that.

But I believe that Calvin is a quiet, private kind of person. You're the exact opposite of that. You're loud and open and dramatic. Which, neither of those things are bad things, and doesn't mean you should abandon your quest for love. But it should be founded on a friendship and an understanding. For him to understand that you're not making fun of him, he needs to understand you, and what you're like. And you need to understand him, and what he's like. I suggest you start small. He was made vulnerable by a love potion, maybe you should show him a vulnerability to make it even. So you don't have, I mean in essence, something on him that he doesn't have on you. And I don't mean you should reveal love to him. I mean you should reveal something honest to him that you don't reveal to anybody else, whatever that is. Give him something you can't take back, even if it backfires.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward auteur 2016-12-07 10:08 pm UTC (link)
	Solo... That's... really beautiful, man. ~~I don't know if I~~ Thank you. [...] OK I'm going to do it. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Re: Ward keepmarchingon 2016-12-07 10:11 pm UTC (link)
	Really? I mean okay, but are you saying that because you're ready to do it, or are you saying that because you acknowledge my attempt at advice, and acknowledge that I'm not actually experienced in anything even remotely close to actual relationships, and you don't actually want to do it? Either decision is fine, and acceptable, but I'm curious. (Reply to this) (Parent)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-07 09:01 pm UTC (link)
	how do we 'abandon these flesh costumes'?? that sounds [...] unpleasant? i can do your hair if you want. i think i know. maybe. if that's what you want, though, you should definitely go. i don't think it's conforming so long as you still act like micah too?? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Ward

auteur
2016-12-07 09:15 pm UTC (link)

OK when we got a minute I have to show you my latest movie treatment about this very thing but NOT RIGHT NOW MAN WE'RE TALKING ABOUT GIRLS

Aw yeah? You don't think your roommates would be bugged by me showing up like HEEEEY COLE make me look like as handsome as you do in order to impress a hypothetical girl???? And YOUR ROOMMATES I mean Calvin because I still have a big gross crush on Calvin. :(

I mean I'm not going to get ANY LESS MICAH so maybe you've got a point. Let's put aside that terrifying existential question and move on to the important stuff: Cole. My dude. Isn't there ANYONE you'd want to go on a date with????

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-07 09:42 pm UTC (link)
	oh. right. okay! i don't think so?? they're all on this ward, though, except for calvin. (why did you leave out calvin??) so you could ask them. or i could just come to azurcrest. [...] i think so. maybe. but she'd say no. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Ward

auteur
2016-12-07 10:04 pm UTC (link)

No no no it's PERFECTLY OK man I am not going to get weird about this. I'm gonna BE MYSELF, BE HONEST and DON'T STRESS like Garrett told me to which he mostly told me regarding asking out girls advice but I think that's gonna keep anyway in all areas of my life. I will come to you. Ribbonfin's NICER anyway I mean Azurcrest ends up smelling like hairspray for HOURS AND HOURS and plus if I come to you maybe I can convince you to come along and have fun????????

What. Who?????? WHICH MYSTERY VIXEN HAS CAPTURED THE HEART OF MY BFF COLE

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-07 10:40 pm UTC (link)
	you mean weird about calvin? ribbonfin usually smells like the lake?? i guess that's better than hairspray, though. okay. you can come here and i'll go if you want me to. i don't think i have anything to wear, though. anything formal. i destroyed my only suit for the owlman. [...] coralee. i think. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward auteur 2016-12-13 11:51 am UTC (link)
	.......yes. Weird about Calvin. SIIIGH. Don't give your heart away, Cole my chum. All it does is make things AWKWARD AND WEIRD???? And YEAH nice nice nice like HEY maybe we can just go What. Like when you were AMORTENTIA'D????????? No. Nooooooo. Cole. Buddy. Have you seen Mufferaw about this??? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-13 12:14 pm UTC (link)
	what would i see mufferaw for, though?? [...] it's not like before. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward auteur 2016-12-13 12:25 pm UTC (link)
	Um for LINGERING EFFECTS of a totally messed up love potion???? Because there's no way you could be into Coralee Wong?????? OH GOD no it's you, you'd never joke about this, you really are into Coralee. Oh god oh man oh god oh man OH GOD ok ok OK. OK!!!!! how is it different now. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward colemoss 2016-12-13 01:06 pm UTC (link)
	ok? it's not a lingering effect, though? i feel like me. and i'm not joking. and i am into coralee. it's worse?? mostly. [...] i know everyone's upset about the amortentia, but it made everything clear and easy and it felt really good. and she liked me. [...] now's not like that. ~~she threw away the drawing i did~~ (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Ward

auteur
2016-12-13 07:26 pm UTC (link)

Nooooooo
But what do you SEE in her
Cole my man you DESERVE BETTER THAN THIS for your first fluttering feelings of
WHYYYY would you crush on someone who talks to you like
I mean I can't really judge but that's not the

OK OK OK so she doesn't feel the same???? That's ~~good~~ rough, buddy. Unrequited love is awful, but an ESSENTIAL HUMAN EXPERIENCE and you will totally get over it ~~hopefully???~~.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

Ward -

colemoss, 2016-12-13 07:39 pm UTC

Ward -

auteur, 2016-12-13 07:45 pm UTC

Ward -

colemoss, 2016-12-13 08:17 pm UTC

	Ward isolate 2016-12-07 09:21 pm UTC (link)
	Flesh costumes? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward auteur 2016-12-07 09:30 pm UTC (link)
	MEAT CONTAINERS??? (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

	Ward isolate 2016-12-07 09:32 pm UTC (link)
	You're hilarious. (Reply to this) (Parent)

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