InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "triangulationist"

ofmanydevices (ofmanydevices) wrote in disappear_rpg,
@ 2010-06-16 08:20:00

Entry tags:

post dungeon, seiko, tom

WHO: Tom, Seiko
WHAT: A discussion about the future of their relationship
WHEN: Shortly after Seiko Dungeon
WHERE: Seiko's dorm
WHY: Cause both of them thinks the other is gonna dump them.

Tom was going over everything in his head, carefully as he approached Seiko's door. Her signals had been ome what mixed since her shadow was defeated. In her dungeon he had noticed the similarities between people who had worn the hat and the personality Seiko had exhibited before entering Paradise. The personality that had expressed an interest in dating him. And people who had worn the hat had expressed concern over his well being when he knew they would otherwise have avoided the topic, suggesting that what the shadow had said was true.

Her current behavior suggested that she'd rather not take things in stride but actually attack them if she found them unpleasant (illustrated by her arguments with Ishinomori.) While Tom most certainly felt this was better... he was also almost certain it would mean she didn't want to deal with his inability to understand simple interpersonal concepts like hugs, and not bringing weapons on a date.

He mentally prepared for what would come next. She would tell him that she had realized her mistake, request that they remain friends, and want to discuss how to maintain a working relationship so things in Paradise didn't become too awkward. He would explain that they're relationship had barely progressed, everything would be fine, and thank her for being there for him, even if it hadn't been for that long.

It all played out in his mind, and he nodded. Doing upsetting things, things that hurt, that was something he was used to, he could take it, and keep going. He knew he needed to get it over with, so he raised his hand to knock on her door. He knocked four times and stepped back.

She would tell him all of that, but first, he would be honest with her, about his feelings, just like she had requested on the roof top. He was prepared to let Seiko go, but not before she knew how much she meant to him.

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ofmanydevices
2010-06-17 03:52 pm UTC (link)

"Yes I heard what you're shadow said. But you missed what mine said, and what people saw in my dungeon. What you're shadow told me wouldn't even breach the top ten horrible things people have said to me." Tom decided not to admit that 5 of those ten things were said by family members.

"I'm used to being belittled and having it rough, that's how things are. The only reason I was so... off in there was because of how much I... I don't know how much I care... I'm not sure this is entirely new ground." He took a step closer to where she was seated, and matched her gaze.

"What I do know... our shadows are part of us, but they do not define us. Who we were before Paradise doesn't become some skin we shed once we accept what we're trying to hide. Who you were before, I.. I liked. You brought me presents, and not random things, you tried to find out what interested me. You are smart, and compassionate, and I don't think all</b of that was an act. But who you've become... I like even more. I would much rather have some one be honest and mad at me, then miserable and pretending it as fine." He looked away for a moment. "And if it turns out everything about you was an act... then I want to know who this new person is. I mean isn't that the point of dating? To learn about each other, to figure out if we are really compatible? That's hat my research has suggested..." He looked away and scratched his neck. "I know this is... it's probably confusing for you, and I can understand that trying to figure out... us, and how you feel about it while trying to figure out who you are can be trying. Even worse because I'm... well I'm me. I can identify a the type of bullet fired from a gun based on the wound it left, I can tell you how to escape from being duct taped, and trapped in the trunk of a car that's sinking in water. I can even explain to you the biological process that is believed to cause attraction, but when it comes to this whole... emotional ... thing, I am so lost. You would have to walk me through all of it, and it's not fair of me to ask you to do that when you have so much else to worry about...." He let out a sigh and looked at the floor. "If you want me to go, I understand. I'll go, and I'll make sure that this... " He swallowed, and tried to catch his breath. He wondered why this was so hard, and put a hand to his face for a moment. "I'll just... go. But if not... if, knowing all of that you still want to try this... then I want it, I want to try at least."