Tweak

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Tweak says, "do you have a toolbelt of love"

kondo kozue | 近藤梢 (anthesphoria) wrote in disappear_rpg,
@ 2010-06-14 23:26:00

Entry tags:

WHO: Kozue and Keiichi
WHAT: Present! A Present!
WHERE: Chagall Cafe.
WHEN: After Seiko's Dungeon.
WHY: Kozue cannot resist her compulsion to buy the world.

Kozue had been medicating her doubts and worries in much the same way she had done after other stints in Paradise—aside from her own—shopping and ice cream and cake. Of course, she had covered two out of three of those things in her own place in Paradise. So she was out for coffee and cake; she was also being productive.

At the used bookstore, when she'd meant to buy a Feel Better gift for Renju, or an I Regret That Your Head God Is On Vacation present (they didn't make cards for that), she had ended up buying... More things. For other people. At least, in a used book store, she hadn't found anything for herself, which had probably saved her some money in the end.

She'd texted Keiichi to let him know she had something to give him—and she'd gotten a piece of peach pie while she waited. With a side of ice cream. If Ito showed up in time, he could have some.

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anthesphoria
2010-06-16 01:12 am UTC (link)

She hadn't thought of that. She finally took that bite of pie, and chewed, thinking it over. "That makes more sense," she said, not adding, than I had given it credit for. "But do you think your friends and team-mates really need that? Does it help them do what they need to do?" She went for another bite of food and stopped, about halfway there. "It is us."

She said it decisively, more decisively than she had planned, and it was only after she said it that she realized to what extent the truth of that mattered to her. "I think every piece of us is us. Trying to distance ourselves from them, that's how we've all ended up in this ugly mess to begin with."

"The more we try to distance ourselves from them, the more we fall back into the habits that made them so exaggerated in the first place. Isn't the whole lesson... well, embracing them?" She put down her fork and let out a short breath, followed by a shake of her head. "No, I'm sorry, maybe I'm not making that much sense."

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keiito
2010-06-16 01:30 am UTC (link)

Keiichi raised a hand to his chin as she spoke. Only once she finished did he speak.

"It is about embracing them, I suppose. But it's not about giving into them. If we gave into them we would be no better than they were. We'd be exactly what they claimed we were -- JUST them."

It was one of the few things Keiichi thought he'd figured out.

"I want to be more assertive. I want to play a bigger role. But I don't want to be..."

"A Balinese Nazi" went unsaid.

"It makes sense," Keiichi replied. "As much as any other theory we can have. We're sort of in the dark here."

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anthesphoria
2010-06-16 01:37 am UTC (link)

"Maybe it's different for you," she asserted, albeit quietly, eying her fork, "than it is for me. I think I was unusual, anyway." Am unusual, she supplied, silent as ever; she had counterpoint she would have made, but there was a point at which the small ground of confidence she had gained gave out beneath her. And talking about her own experience in Paradise, even obliquely, was becoming treacherous ground, something difficult except in small measures.

She sat, somewhat quiet, for a moment before reaching for her utensils again. Peach pie would remedy this. Right? "It helps me. To think that in some ways, I'm like that. Or I could be like that."

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keiito
2010-06-16 01:43 am UTC (link)

"It's entirely possible," he had to admit, as the waiter returned with peach pie for Keiichi. He nodded a thank you, both to Kozue and the waiter, and tried not to devour the thing.

"I was...also odd, I guess. Me being in there was an accident, I guess." Thinking that point over, he sighed. "Well, in one sense. If things had kept up, I'd have probably been shadowed the next time I went in. I had a lot on my mind, and..."

A bite of peach pie. Yummy.

Subject change. "That's a story for another day. I haven't actually told anyone yet." That, in and of itself, was slightly embarrassing.

As was what popped to mind next.

"...is it bad that part of me sort of wants to be Shadow Keiichi?" he asked, before quickly amending, "minus the oppressive dictatorship aspects?"

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anthesphoria
2010-06-16 02:32 am UTC (link)

She was caught between whether to ask for that story, or to respond to his last question; she pushed another bite of her pie around the plate, thinking, and, finally she spoke. "No. That's how I feel. Well, I don't want to be your Shadow, that'd be way too much pressure, and I don't want to be the prom queen or running a hotel or anything. But I want to be someone who can… Well," she swallowed, and willed herself to say it. "Not feel awful about myself."

Even though he had seen, she felt as though she had to say it. That being said, however, she immediately shoved the bite of pie into her mouth; a reward or a stop to keep her from saying anything else.

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keiito
2010-06-16 02:49 am UTC (link)

"Awful about yourself?" He'd seen her Shadow of course, and so had some semblance of her self-issues. It didn't quite compute, though, with what he saw of her. "You're probably one of the best people we have. Definitely one of the only ones who is actually good at communicating with other people."

He sighed, and shook his head. "I'm not really so good at that. Neither are most of us, so you're really important."

Happily, he took another bite of pie. "You also get me very tasty pie."

Being comforting was something he liked to think he did well. "You're a great person, Kondo-san," he came up with. Simple, but true.

...maybe he wasn't so good at comforting after all.

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anthesphoria
2010-06-16 02:55 am UTC (link)

She took a slow breath, and nodded; it was much the same as what Tom had said, and it was a little easier to believe, for being the second time she had heard it. Just a little. And it was true, that most of the team had checked out of that part of personal education. Maybe they'd missed that week in pre-school or something.

"Tom-san said that to me, recently, too," Kozue admitted, after a moment. "Or something like it. It doesn't really seem like some kind of huge skill, but… when it's put that way, I guess it's something."

Maybe it was actually talking in Seiko's dungeon, taking a role that was something besides Diarama and Recarm, that had begun to fill her with some sort of confidence in that arena. It wasn't that she thought she was bad with people—she knew she wasn't. It was recognizing that strength as a skill and not a basic fact of all life that was the strange, difficult step. "Thank you. That's what I meant to say."

"And like I said, I got something for you." She reached into her bag, fishing around for a few moments.

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keiito
2010-06-16 06:35 pm UTC (link)

"It's a vital skill," Keiichi asserted, "particularly considering that as a team, we may be getting better, but are still pretty combustible, by and large."

That was probably an understatement. The personality conflicts within the group were rather large, and in many ways, likely irreconcilable.

Keiichi watched as she dug into her bag. "You didn't have to get me anything," he said, feeling a bit guilty. He had no idea why he'd merited a gift, and really wasn't used to getting them in the first place.

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anthesphoria
2010-06-16 09:25 pm UTC (link)

The object was wrapped in furoshiki—Kozue didn't own any actual wrapping paper. It was rectangular, rather hefty, and passed over to Keiichi from both of Kozue's hands. "I just saw it and decided to pick it up. It's nothing major. And, if you think it is major, well, you did save my life."

Kozue followed that with a smile, less beaming and more genuine; it was true. Aside from continuing to go into Paradise with them, what could she do for the people who had made sure she didn't die, even when she had made it difficult on them? Buying them trinkets was the least thing, but it was something Kozue was confident she could do correctly.

"Go ahead, please, open it," she encouraged, after he'd gotten the present in his hands. When Keiichi undid the complex, traditionally folded cloth that wrapped the present, he'd find a cook book—a translated, older copy of the classic Julie Kiddies cookbook.

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keiito
2010-06-16 10:02 pm UTC (link)

The cloth stymied him at first. Traditional things always did, a bit, primarily because of just how...untraditional his own household was. Still, he worked at it, the weight of the object in his hands also catching him a bit off guard.

Keiichi's cheeks flushed light pink, and he looked away momentarily. "It's nothing," he replied, continuing to work at the cloth. Once it came undone, he turned over the cookbook in his hands a few times, looking at the front cover.

"Th-thank you..."

It was the nicest cookbook he'd ever owned. Most of his were picked up at the used bookstore. Many of them had scribbles in them. Japanese or not, he was familiar with the great French chef, Julie Kiddies.

Flipping through the first few pages to the table of contents, a whole world of possibilities were opened to him. Omelettes. Soups. Stews. Main dishes. Desserts.

He placed the book on top of the cloth, and rounded the table to hug her. "I'll treasure it," Keiichi said. "It's so big. I wonder what I should cook first..."

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anthesphoria
2010-06-17 12:06 am UTC (link)

Kozue smiled; she had tried to stifle a laugh as Keiichi fumbled with the cloth wrapping. He was neither the kind of person she associated with traditional arts (his brand of wrestling was not, in fact, a traditional art, even if Sumo was) nor with the manual dexterity necessary to open small, fine things like that. Or. Other things.

That thought only made her need to stifle a stronger chuckle. But his reaction turned the laugh into a smile; a wide, pleased smile. She'd chosen well. He didn't have it, and he knew what it was, and he liked it.

"You're welcome," she said, the polite response; she looked down at the book and, almost immediately, suggested, "I think you should bake something sweet. And breakfasty." Like pancakes, or waffles, or… french waffles, Kozue wasn't sure. She paused. "You could make me breakfast, tomorrow."

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keiito
2010-06-17 12:12 am UTC (link)

He wasn't too upset at her chuckles; after all, he really wasn't good at this sort of thing. His hands were good for what they were good for. Knots and wrappings were not among those.

"Let's see here, breakfasty..." A further flip to that section opened up a litany of possible options. "Pancakes could work, I could make them with lots of fillings, fruit or chocolate chips or something like that..."

Keiichi had gone into Food Mode, usually only seen when at Cooking Club, or when making dinner for himself in the dorms.

Closing the book carefully, he brought himself back into the real world. "Of course I'll make you breakfast tomorrow. What time do you want to come over? I'll make sure to set my alarm."

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anthesphoria
2010-06-17 12:16 am UTC (link)

This was either cute or stupid, or some combination of the two. Kozue was not entirely sure how it balanced out, in the end, but thought that probably it was stupi-cute. A bit more stupid, but ultimately okay.

"I really like chocolate chips. And strawberries." Oh, like the team didn't know that. She stopped to look at the book a moment. "And, Ito-kun, you do know what a girl asking someone that usually means, right?"

The answer was, obviously, no, if he was planning on either setting an alarm or having her come over in the morning. She was beginning to wonder if maybe being in Paradise had scrambled more brains that just Ishinomori's. As for the familiar address, well... They were familiar. Even if he was, apparently, too dense to get it.

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keiito
2010-06-17 12:56 am UTC (link)

"...Oh."

It was a moment of epiphany, really. Keiichi knew what that word meant, even. Sort of.

Perhaps the problem was that he sort of associated those sorts of things with the state of Dating. Whatever else was happening here, he was reasonably certain Kozue didn't want to revisit *that* particular disaster.

So, that made this a very much Not Date.

"I do, yes. Now that you mention it," he added, a bit lamely afterwards. "I would...rather like that, Kondo-chan."

He felt odd admitting it. The closest he'd ever come was when he'd been walking by and noticed half of the school admiring her rear end.

There was, though, no getting around the fact that Kondo Kozue was rather attractive. And a friend of his. And if dating hadn't killed their friendship, it was unlikely this would. Right?

"Would you like to come shopping with me," he asked, realizing belatedly it might be a dangerous question. "I need to pick up some ingredients. Like strawberries."

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anthesphoria
2010-06-17 02:50 am UTC (link)

"I've never had anybody respond with I'd rather like that," Kozue said, snickering a little bit. It was so... so polite, and so awkward. If Kou hadn't been, well, Kou, that would have been a thing she'd have expected to hear from him. "Don't be stiff or official like that. This isn't a big deal." She nodded, encouragingly, and made herself stop laughing.

"I mean, I want you to know that. I'm not asking you out again. If you ask me out again, I'm saying no."

That was harsh; Kozue knew even as she was saying it, that it was harsh. "I'm not… I'm not okay to do that with anyone, right now, some misguided attempt at love and romance? And besides, it tanked the first time. But we're really good friends. It's better if we're just friends with benefits."

"So, yes, let's go shopping." She'd be able to wheedle her way into more than one breakfast dish, that way, maybe. Omelettes? Crepes? Ooh, bacon.

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keiito
2010-06-17 03:12 pm UTC (link)

Keiichi blinked at her a few times. Yep, there was definitely something of a...disconnect was the wrong word, since they both seemed to at least be agreeing on these relevant issues.

She was definitely much more casual than he was about it, which made sense, since she was much more casual than he was in general. Which was slightly odd, when he thought about it -- traditional grandmother as major influence in her life, somewhat insane professional wrestler as major influence in his.

Maybe they were both rebelling.

"You're right," he said, quietly. "Remember the last time we spoke? I do like you, but in a..." It was hard to explain this point, really, especially since he didn't quite know what to say himself. "I...think that was sort of why it was awkward for me. I don't think I'm exactly ready for dating, either." The entire Misaki situation had probably made that abundantly clear.

There was peach pie he'd been neglecting. The only positive to this was that the ice cream had begun to melt, coating the crust with creamy goodness. He took a couple of bites that were smaller and politer than he'd have liked; in private, he'd have devoured the pie in four bites.

"Interesting benefits we have," he chuckled. He wasn't quite sure if she was in this for the food, or...other things, or maybe both. He liked to think that she could have good food when she wanted; her family was loaded, after all.

That, in turn, led to a string of "why me" questions that he decided to shove away for the time being.

"Alright, we're off," he said, grinning at her. "As soon as I finish this pie, that is."

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anthesphoria
2010-06-17 11:51 pm UTC (link)

"Oh, take your time," she said, waving slightly, "Don't wolf it all down and get sick, I can wait." Her pie, indeed, was maybe one or two bites away from done; she took this opportunity to go from maybe-one to definitely-one bite left.

"Don't be awkward, either," she added, after a moment. "That's just…" She stopped herself from saying such a beginner mistake, because that was beginning to imply all sorts of wrong things. "Nobody benefits from awkwardness, I'll tell you that."

Whether their benefits were interesting or quite run of the mill, Kozue was not saying; it wasn't like people didn't offer sex for other things all the time. It wasn't like Kozue hadn't done that on occasion. And it usually wasn't honest, either. This was, in her mind, a step forward.

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keiito
2010-06-18 12:09 am UTC (link)

"Thank you," he said, slowing down his pace a bit, allowing him to actually taste the peachy goodness.

He listened to her speak. Keiichi perceived a mix of chiding and encouragement in her voice, which was something he tended to read out of her a lot.

It was something that he really read from a lot of people, come to think of it.

"There's a certain innate awkward that comes with being Keiichi, really," he explained, and really, she'd been around him enough to know that it was likely true. "I'll avoid the benefits related awkward, though."

Really, the benefits being offered were rather nice. Especially considering...

"I don't know if I ever really said this when we dated, so it's kind of overdue. You're really hot."

It was a sort of...un-Keiichi moment, all told, but a genuine one. Dat ass didn't lie.

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anthesphoria
2010-06-19 06:34 pm UTC (link)

She laughed, her eyes squeezing closed, as she brushed another stray piece of hair back from her face. "Thanks, Ito-kun." It was sweet. Sweet in, yes, that kind of awkward way that, as she thought about it, she realized she associated with Keiichi now and again. Possibly less often than he thought it of himself.

It wasn't that she didn't know it, but this was not the way in which she usually was told she was attractive. Usually, it had more of an ulterior motive—or more spite—hovering about. And considering that Keiichi had already gotten what people usually had an ulterior motive for? It was less suspect.

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keiito
2010-06-19 09:18 pm UTC (link)

Keiichi had been right, of course. Kozue *was* hot. But there was more than that; she could also be really cute sometimes too. Her laughter made him feel that way, coupled with the casual brush of hair away from her face.

"Don't mention it," he grinned back, putting away his last forkful of peach pie. It had been quite good, but his mind was temporarily diverted away from food and onto other, even more pleasant thoughts.

"When you're finished, we can go to the Iburi Duper Mart," Keiichi said, "as it's probably closest to here. I haven't been there in forever...not since the day I ended up in Paradise."

He hadn't thought about that in a while, really. Paradise he more or less remembered, but the events leading up to him going in were a blur.

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