InsaneJournal

Tweak says, "eat my rotten meat! "

Lothíriel, Queen of Rohan | Lord of the Rings (queenofrohan) wrote in compass_network,
@ 2013-04-15 02:03:00

Entry tags:

!open, maryanne walker (oe)

Love is a cruel myth created to make women obey.

Men do not love us. They may be fond of us, but they think only of themselves, and when they tire of us...then all the words they have told us mean nothing. And if we are foolish enough to believe them, and love them in return...

Then we are heartbroken.

And we must simply live with this. It is as my father says. It is my burden to bear, and I must do my duty.

So it is. So it always will be.

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loves_abeast
2013-04-15 07:02 pm UTC (link)

It's all right to be afraid. That doesn't make you weak.

You told me he treated you well. That he wished you to be who you were. A man who didn't love you wouldn't do that.

Your father sounds like someone who doesn't understand love, how strong it can make someone. How could he know the inside your husband's heart? You were the one who spent all that time alone with him. You got to know him. You should trust yourself to believe what your own heart and mind told you, not the judgements of someone else.

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	queenofrohan 2013-04-15 07:13 pm UTC (link)
	He did treat me well! He was always so gentle with me, and so kind. And we would talk! We talked so much. And he never made me do anything I didn't want to do. Kind, and gentle, and handsome. It was more than I ever deserved. I should have known it could not possibly be true. (Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)

loves_abeast
2013-04-15 07:16 pm UTC (link)

Why would he have done all that if it weren't true? That's not something men generally bother with, if they only want other things. They might give you trinkets, but they don't bother to get to know you heart, as he did.

Of course I don't know everything, but from the way you speak, he did these things because he saw you did deserve them. Because he cared about you, and loved you. And I'm sure he still does. Just because another woman who held his heart is here doesn't mean you've lost hold of it, or that you never did.

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queenofrohan
2013-04-15 07:20 pm UTC (link)

My heart says he loved me. And I love him, so much. But...

I don't deserve him. I just..I don't. I have nothing to offer him. All I know how to do are silly things. Embroidery. Women's arts. I can't even cook. And I'm terrified of horses. They scare me so much! And I know he wants me to learn how to ride, so that is just another way I disappoint him. I shake every time I get near one of those terrifying beasts.

I feel so...beneath her. She is everything he deserves. Strong, smart, loves horses. Has useful skills.

I am just...a pretty face.

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loves_abeast
2013-04-15 09:19 pm UTC (link)

Those aren't silly things. They have their own purpose, just as much as fighting and cooking and riding do. They're useful in their own place. I can barely cook or clean, all I know is from my books, languages and old stories. People told me those were useless, but if they are we wouldn't teach them. Just because they are things women are taught to do doesn't make them useless.

If you were only pretty, he wouldn't have spoken to you as you say that he did, gotten to know you. Just because you don't fight or ride doesn't mean you're not strong. It's just a different sort of strength. He doesn't seem the sort who would take interest in a woman who was truly weak, not as long as he has you.

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