Celandine's Chronicle (celandineb) wrote in cels_fic_haven, @ 2011-09-30 10:00:00 |
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Entry tags: | hp fic harry/severus, hp fic he plays at hazard, hp quill-it 100.3 |
HP fic: He Plays at Hazard, ch. 10: Strike a New Path [Harry/Severus, general]
Title: Strike a New Path
Author: celandineb
Fandom: HP
Pairing: Harry/Severus
Rating: general
Length: 1180 words
Warnings: AU; canon-compliant only through Half-Blood Prince
Summary: Severus's decision to return to teaching does not make Harry happy.
Note: For quill_it, 100.3, prompt 85, "wash". For cruisedirector who asked for Snape. My muse decided to go way, way back and produce a new instalment in a very old unfinished fic, "He Plays at Hazard," and take it in a wholly unexpected direction. I tried hard to make this piece stand alone, however.
"I must go to Diagon Alley today," said Snape over toast the next morning. His expression suggested anything but pleasure at the idea.
"Why? What do you need there? Perhaps I could get it for you," suggested Harry. He poured himself a second cup of tea and added milk and three generous spoons of sugar, ignoring Snape's grimace.
"I require new robes. Not something that you can do for me, Harry."
"Probably not, no. But what do you need new robes for? Those you have seem plenty good enough for me," Harry said. "It isn't as though we go out to the opera, or fancy restaurants, or anything."
"Hogwarts expects a certain level of respectability," said Snape. "My present attire is becoming threadbare, and unlike certain former professors, I still have sufficient gold in Gringotts to purchase replacements when necessary."
Harry scowled at the tacit criticism of Lupin, but let it pass. Far more important was the fact that Severus had just implicitly stated that he was going to accept Headmistress McGonagall's invitation to return to Hogwarts.
"I thought you didn't like teaching," he said bluntly.
Snape shrugged. "It is employment, in a relatively congenial environment. I cannot hide here in the old Black house forever." He fiddled with the crust of his toast and would not meet Harry's eyes.
"So you're leaving me?" Harry swallowed hard against the lump in his throat. Not that he'd thought things would last forever between himself and Snape... but it had only been a few weeks. Had he done something to make Snape's feelings change? Had he pushed too hard? "What if I promise not to pester you about wanting to sleep alone?"
"It has nothing to do with that," Snape dismissed the question. "I cannot live on your charity, Harry. Sooner or later I will need to work again, and Minerva's offer is a good one. I can teach Defence Against the Dark Arts."
"The first person to do so for more than a single year since before my parents were in school." Harry swallowed again. "I... congratulations, I suppose, Severus. I suppose you can't miss this opportunity."
"You could come back with me and finish out your seventh year." Now Snape looked at him.
Harry raised his eyebrows. "Back to school, after everything that's happened? Be there with you as my professor again, after what we've been to each other... what I thought we've been, anyhow? I don't think I could stand that."
"You have endured greater trials," said Snape, his voice soft.
"Only because I had no choice." Harry swept his hand sideways in a gesture of negation, and knocked over his teacup. Tea washed across the table, staining the cloth. "Fuck. Kreacher!"
The house-elf appeared and quickly cleaned up the spill as Harry apologized, then vanished with a pop. The accident had made Harry pause to consider, however.
"I just think it would be incredibly hard to go back and be a student again now, and having you around, but without being able to be together the way we are now... it would be horrible."
"It will only be more difficult to go back later on, and you might well regret not finishing. There are jobs you can get with only O.W.L. exams, but they're not the sort of thing you would enjoy for very long. I seem to recall Minerva mentioning once that you wanted to become an Auror, and believe me, that will not be possible if you don't sit your N.E.W.T.s," said Snape.
Stubbornly Harry shook his head. "If they won't make an exception in my case, I'll find something else to do with myself. I could look into professional Quidditch, maybe."
"Harry... I understand that you're angry with me for making the decision to return to Hogwarts to teach, but don't let that push you into refusing to do so yourself." Snape sighed. "I knew you would feel this way."
"But it matters more that you do what you want."
Snape's patience visibly snapped. "Not just what I want, Harry. What would be best for both of us. If you refuse to return to school, that is your decision. You're of age and no one can compel you to go. In that case, though, it is also best that you and I part now, before... well. No matter."
"Before what?" Harry demanded.
"I have said over and over again that I am too old for you," said Snape, "and I daresay this proves it."
"You're saying I'm being childish?"
"Aren't you?"
Harry glared at him. "Do you want to be sitting in the Great Hall at Hogwarts, seeing me, thinking of going to bed together and knowing that we can't, for a whole year?"
"Ten months or so," Snape corrected, "and no, I don't especially want that, but I can live with it if it means that you'll be able to pursue your dream of being an Auror." His hand trembled, only slightly but Harry saw it, as he reached for his teacup and raised it to his lips. "There are always compromises in life... but throwing away a dream needlessly is not one I will permit you to make, not if there is any way I can prevent it."
"Oh," said Harry in a small voice. "I didn't understand."
"It might not be quite as bad as you think, Harry. You'll be busy with all your classes, as I will be with mine. I believe that both Miss Granger and Mister Weasley are strongly considering returning. I would be surprised if Miss Granger decided otherwise, and if you are there, I should think they both will return as well. You won't be the only one beyond your year. I am certain Minerva will find some way to accommodate you in the dormitory."
"It'll still be rotten to see you, but not see you," Harry muttered, but Snape was beginning to persuade him.
"As to that... given that Minerva is already aware of our relationship, I might be able to convince her that we should be permitted to spend a night together each week, as long as we are extremely discreet. I could not, of course, be your professor for Defence, but that would be true in any event. If I provide her with my lesson plans, she can instruct you individually as much as necessary, and you can practise with the other students in the class," said Snape.
"Once a week?" Harry focussed on what was most important to him just now.
"I hope that often." Snape's mouth quirked. "You can tell your friends you have detention, as long as you return to the Gryffindor tower before they wake the next morning."
"Hermione will figure it out, but I'll convince her to keep quiet about it, her and Ron both," said Harry absently. "Yeah. This might work out after all."
"Good," said Snape quietly. Under his breath, so that Harry guessed he was not supposed to hear, he added, "I promised I'd look after you and yours, Lily. See? I do keep my word."
chs. 1-3 / chs. 4-5 / ch. 6 / ch. 7 / ch. 8 / ch. 9 / ch. 10