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Tony Stark is characteristically hyperverbal. ([info]the_iron_man) wrote in [info]avengers_net,
@ 2019-05-22 00:19:00

Previous Entry  Add to memories!  Tell a Friend!  Next Entry
Entry tags:- network, - spoiler, carol danvers, hope van dyne, natasha romanoff, nick fury, peter parker, peter quill, scott lang, steve rogers, tony stark, wanda maximoff

Major Spoiler


Guess who died? This guy.

Well, over there I died. Over here? Dodged that bullet. Now I need to not disappear here. Yeah. No pressure.

So that everyone acknowledges the great big red and gold elephant in the room, I'm gonna smack down that hunka awkward right here in the open. Give Bruce the kudos, since the Professor fried his arm snapping everyone back. I'm the Thanos duster. That said, I'm gonna announce that Pep and I are about to have a huge ass wedding and reception on June 1st. Everyone and their grandma is invited, including all of you new arrivals. I'm been watching Youtube and scribbling down some vows this week. Should I go with the 80's Power Ballad or should I do The Classic Wedding Vows?

I'm on the fence. One's got an obligatory keyboard intro while a 80's hot chick is dry humping the hood of a car, and then there's that leather pants guitar solo. Everyone's overdosed on Aqua Net. That's a whole vibe going on right there.

The other has a motorcycle sailing through a stained glass window and exploding kitchen stuff. I've blown up a few kitchen appliances before. Sure, it's a little ball and chainy, but everyone knows that song. It'd be an interactive sing along. You know what? I can sing it too.

Maybe I need a karaoke machine up there.

Decisions are hard.



[private to Steve]

I know we talked about this before, but I'm shoulder tapping Loki to do the remodel of the tower. Got it all mocked up and I think we can get it done really fast. I'll oversee the security systems and wiring everything in. After crunching numbers, it's the fastest way to get the job done and I'm throwing the guy a big bone of redemption here.


[private to Loki]

Hi. You wrecked my other tower. I'd like you to do a tower remodel like you did at the warehouse and scoot some things around. I got a outline. You do it? We'll call it all even-steven.

Wedding invite includes you, but we both know that might get sticky with Clint and Coulson. I don't think they know you were cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs either. If anyone pitches a bitch at the wedding or reception, I'm pretty sure Pep will go 80 feet tall fire-breathing Bridezilla all over their ass. Rule #1: Don't piss off Pep. She's killed bad guys less likable than you. Friendly word of advice? Stick close to Thor and Val, and try to impersonate someone who isn't Cap. It's funny. But if you tell anyone I said that, I'm gonna deny it.


[private to Peter Parker]

Your aunt called. Said you're huddled up in your room looking like someone kicked your puppy, and I think I know why. I'm gonna fly over if that's ok.

[private to Nat]

We're gonna need more dim sum.



(Read comments) - (Post a new comment)


[info]the_iron_man
2019-05-23 06:55 pm UTC (link)
I proudly support the talc-free baby powder industry.

Powder down and pull up them leather pants. Add an air guitar solo at the reception? Then try to convince her not to call a lawyer to get the marriage annulled.

Yeah. I'm being optimistic. For once.

I know she has her lawyer on speed dial.

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]iburgle
2019-05-24 06:58 pm UTC (link)
I just meant you'll probably have to cut yourself out of them at the end of the night because of the heat. But hey, if you can pull it off without an annulment..

(Reply to this) (Parent) (Thread)


[info]the_iron_man
2019-05-25 03:56 am UTC (link)
You understand the trials and tribulations of leather pants.

I am never forgetting your name ever again.

(Reply to this) (Parent)


(Read comments) -


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