InsaneJournal

[fic] "Small Comfort", Saiyuki (Gojyo/Hakkai)
I'm SO sorry this is being posted so late. IJ was giving me more problems than I wanted to deal with twice yesterday, and then... yeah. I shouldn't leave my fic-writing for the last minute, I really shouldn't. Anyway.

Title: Small Comfort
Author: writerzilch
Rating: PG
Warnings: None! Worksafe.
Summary: It's been a rainy, cold, and totally miserable day.
A/N: I like how this came out. It's more of a mood-piece than anything, really, but I'm pleased with the narration.




It's been a cold day, a rainy day, a cold and rainy and miserable suckfest of a day that just doesn't want to end. Even the damn monkey looks totally sick of fighting, and that's saying something.

I just want a smoke and a meal and a warm bed and someone to share it with.

Doesn't look like I'm gonna be getting any of those things tonight, though.

"Ah. This appears to be the place." I look up when Hakkai speaks, because if he's already sounding apologetic, it means we're in trouble.

"...It's a warehouse," says Goku. He doesn't even sound outraged. He just sounds tired.

Sanzo snorts. "Worthless town. Can't even spare floor space in a barn, so they send us to rot out in a condemned building?"

"Now, now." Hakkai's wearing his "Let's make the best of it" face. "It's probably best that we don't stay in the town proper, anyway, what with the number of assassins lately--"

"Whatever," I say. "Better than sleeping in the woods, right?"

The windows are all broken in. There are probably rats. It might be better than the woods, but only just barely.

"This completely sucks," mutters Goku as we shove aside the rotted door and file in. I'm too tired to even waste the effort it'd take to stick out my foot and trip him as he brushes past.

Hakkai catches my eye. He's doing the worry-face now, except I'm probably the only one who knows it's the worry-face. To anyone else it'd just look blank. But I can see the way he wants to frown, and the way he keeps his head down low, like it'll ward off the negative thoughts or something.

I clap him on the shoulder while Sanzo and the ape settle in, if trying to get comfortable on an arrangement of old crates counts as "settling in". "You okay?"

"Of course, Gojyo. It's been a long day, is all."

"You're tellin' me." I yawn hugely, mostly for effect, though I really am fucking exhausted. "Besides that, I'm starving. I'd kill for a good steak right about now."

His smile looks almost pained. "I'm afraid jerky will have to do for now. We can see about getting supplies in the morning."

Goku whines all through dinner, and Sanzo doesn't hit him. He barely even yells, which means he's probably worse off than the rest of us. It's a particular Sanzo-perversity, the way he gets less nasty the worse he feels. Seriously, someday he'll hug somebody, and we'll have to put him on suicide watch.

Goku kinda wilts after that, which I guess is perverse in its own way, too. He's the only person I know whose feelings get hurt when his reason for being stops cursing him out.

I'm surrounded by freaks.

Not that I'm feeling too spiffy here, either. My back aches and my feet hurt and dammit, the cement floor is cold. There's a constant drip-drip-drip over in the far corner where the roof is crumbling and the rain is getting in. Everything smells damp, like musty towels when you leave them on the bathroom floor for way too long. And the monkey is snoring, and here I am, too tired to even go over and kick him.

"Gojyo," Hakkai whispers, after I'm sure the others are asleep. I glance at Sanzo to be sure, but his breathing is even and some of the tension has drained from his face. I roll over to face Hakkai.

"What's up?"

He doesn't really answer, he just scootches over 'til he's close enough to touch. I almost throw my arm over him and drag him closer, but Goku murmurs in his sleep, and Sanzo shifts restlessly, and I think, Too risky.

"It's been a hard day," Hakkai says, sort of tone-neutral, like he's fishing for something.

I frown at him. "Hard day, hard week, hard life," I mutter. "We deal."

He nods, but not like he agrees. There's something so tired in his eyes.

"Go to sleep," I say. "You'll feel better if you, like, rest." What a Hakkai thing to say.

He smiles at me faintly, probably thinking the same thing. "Of course. You're right. But, Gojyo--" He stops there, just looking at me, and I wish they made decoder-rings for the question in his face. It'd make reading Hakkai so much damn easier.

"Just. Go to sleep, dumbass." I resist the urge to look back over my shoulder as I slide closer and flip the corner of my blanket over him. This'll look really bad in the morning if they catch us, but hell, I can say something about sharing warmth or whatever and if Sanzo gives me so much as a sideways look about it I'll pound his monktastic ass into a pulp. I'm serious.

Hakkai sighs. It doesn't sound manly at all to say he snuggles closer, but that's pretty much what he does, so I end up with his hair tickling my chin and his hips pressed way too close. I almost say no way, nuh-uh, get back on your side of the floor, but that just seems way too assholish, even for me. Besides, he is really warm, so I just let go of the breath I hadn't realized I was holding and I relax against him.

It's been a rainy, cold, and totally miserable day.

No one can blame me for taking my comforts where I can.