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daphne greengrass is [bulletproof];; (daphne__g) wrote in wished,
@ 2009-10-21 13:56:00

Entry tags:

!1997: 10, !incomplete, daphne greengrass, nikolas vaisey

WHO: Daphne Greengrass & Nikolas Vaisey
WHAT: The accumulation of stress from the Vaisey's and Greengrass' takes a toll on the children!
WHERE: The Astronomy Tower
WHEN: Wednesday evening, around dinner time.
RATING/STATUS: PG-13; alcohol use, possible language / Started - Incomplete; Open to Nikolas Vaisey.

Whoever said that life at seventeen was easy was a damn liar. Life at seventeen for Daphne Greengrass was filled with responsibilities that she wanted nothing to do with. Everything around her felt like it was falling apart, and she had no control over anything. All she could control was eating, sleeping, and breathing. Which is exactly why she was skipping out on dinner, she didn't have to go, and she sure as hell wasn't hungry, she lost her appetite months ago. Seeking out a quiet place within the school was difficult, half the classrooms were filled, and the other half couldn't be trusted; what with rooms randomly locking students in, and others flooding with water. The common room was no better, students all giggling, and gossiping about the day just frustrated Daphne. She found herself having a shorter fuse with her house mates, and even snapping at them for some petty reason. The only solution she could find was taking to the Astronomy Tower - one of the tallest towers at Hogwarts. No student ever went up there, unless it was for a class, but considering it was only dinner time, close wasn't happening for another six hours.

She needed a place to escape, to leave everything and everyone behind, and forget about things that were happening that she didn't want happening. That's what brought her to the tower in the first place. The cool night air calmed her senses slightly, and made her realize that perhaps all that firewhiskey wasn't the brightest of ideas. A half empty bottle rested on the ground as the girl took a seat on the cool stones beside it. A case laid open on the other side of her which revealed a gorgeous, highly polished violin. Plucking the instrument from the case, fingers deftly moved over the strings, as she heard the instrument practically sigh from the touch -- or maybe that was her? She didn't place it under her chin to play, instead she just allowed the instrument to rest in her lap. Pressing her back against the wall, it steadied her all ready half intoxicated mind. The ground beneath her didn't feel like cold stone, instead it was like clouds which shifted beneath her and left her feeling weightless. She wanted to play her violin so badly, so much so that she brought the instrument with her up to the tower. However, after finding the bottle of whiskey in a secret compartment of the case, she decided drinking might be a better idea.

That feeling of weightlessness was a feeling welcomed to the Slytherin, still dressed in her uniform. Robes were carelessly tossed to the ground after her third shot, and thus left her at the moment in a clean, crisp white shirt that hugged her slender frame, with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. The Slytherin crest was sewn neatly upon the front of her shirt and that green and silver tie was straightened and perfectly aligned around her neck. Her black skirt hugged her hips, as a pair of white knee highs accented those sinfully long legs. A new pair of shiny patent leather Mary Janes heels completed her outfit. Sitting outside, on the parapet she looked out of her place, especially with a half empty bottle of Ogden's Firewhiskey to one side and a violin on her lap.

This was going to be an interesting evening.

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daphne__g
2009-10-23 10:33 pm UTC (link)

Daphne winced as he cracked his knuckles. Ugh, that sound was like nails on a chalkboard to her, one of her many pet peeves. The girl could fills hundreds of pieces of parchment with things she did not like, and still would have more to list. Sometimes it was just easier to list things she enjoyed, which was a much smaller list; mainly consisting of being alone, and happily enjoying peace and quiet. Of course she was looking for reassurance, despite being headstrong, and overly confident, the girl was still a girl, and while she did a damn good job about hiding her insecurities, in her current state of mind she was slipping.

Shrugging slightly, Daphne folded her arms and rested her head down, "I know I'm selfish," She stated bluntly once more, "I'm constantly reminded of that in the daily owls I receive from home. I'm ungrateful, I'm selfish, and I have horrible social skills. Tell me something I don't know, Vaisey." Rolling her eyes, Daphne forgot to mention under all that confidence, and self righteousness was actually a girl completely doubting herself, and full of insecurities that she hid behind a frigid, stone cold wall. That relationships terrified her, and being close to anyone made her feel vulnerable. Perhaps that was why she felt so against being forced into a marriage with Nikolas.

His attempts at a disapproving face only made her smile. He looked tired, and who could blame him? Between the both of them they drank enough to have them passed out for the next day, and probably severely hung over. In the back of her mind Daphne began to wonder how they were going to make it down the stairs and back to the common room without attracting attention. This was going to be a problem, but at the moment, Daphne could care less. She didn't want to go back to the common room, not with all those Slytherin's still lingering about to see Daphne's less then sober state.

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besserwisser
2009-10-23 11:45 pm UTC (link)

Nikolas just sighed and offered a languid smile by way of apology. "Hm," he said. "Well if it bothers you, and I don't care if you say it doesn't because it must bother you or else you wouldn't try so hard to make it look like it doesn't, then at least make an effort not to be selfish, or ungrateful, of whatever. Or if that really is how you are...well then I guess that's unfortunate for you."

Closing his eyes, he appeared to drift off for nearly half a minute before he added, "But if that's the case than I'm the one who's going to suffer since at least you're perfectly content to stay that way."

That would probably make her angry, but Nikolas very much didn't care right now. His thoughts kept wandering every time he managed to get them on track, and he was having trouble focusing on what they were talking about anymore. Of course the conversation had to revolve around Daphne, and her problems, and how he was supposed to just deal with it. Was this what he was supposed to be getting married to? What a load of bollocks.

What did Nikolas want to do right now? He wanted to go to sleep, preferably in his own bed, but that was down several stories and through countless corridors, along which he would no doubt be accosted by Prefects, or the Head Boy or Girl, or worse, a Professor. He wondered if this had even occurred to Daphne, or whether she'd come up here with the intention of just camping out indefinitely and wallowing in her misery. Nikolas' mood quickly souring, he wouldn't have been surprised if that was exactly what she'd had planned.

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daphne__g
2009-10-24 12:17 am UTC (link)

Daphne fell silent as she quickly looked away from him. Rolling her eyes, as she just sighed. He was right, he was going to suffer. He was going to suffer because Daphne was one of the hardest girl to satisfy. As he seemed to be drifting in and out of sleep, Daphne's mind was racing with thoughts that she couldn't quite grasp. The feeling of floating was quickly changing to a crushing feeling on her chest. A sharp breeze billowed through the tower, and forced the girl to shiver slightly. This evening was quickly turning bad as Nikolas had this way of making her feel like shite (or maybe she was just making herself feel that way). This wasn't how this evening was supposed to go. She was supposed to be alone, and secluded, and while she couldn't deny she didn't appreciated the company and conversation, she could do without the guilty feeling he just placed in her.

"I'm sorry," Closing her eyes, she tried to concentrate on her breathing as she turned her head to face him, "I'm sorry that I am such a miserable prat, and you're going to have to put up with me. I know I can't be anyone's first choice for a wife, bloody hell, I don't even think I would want to marry myself." Pausing, she just seemed to be talking without a filter at this point.

"And I never said I was content this way," She said more in a passive tone, she was in no mood to argue, and she was far too drunk to even care. "I just find it easier to keep people away then let them in. It prevents me from getting hurt, and makes everthing... simpler, I guess." Shrugging slightly, in Daphne's mind it made sense. "I mean, to be honest," Daphne's voice trailed off for a moment like she was second guessing what she was about to say.

"I'm utterly terrified."

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besserwisser
2009-10-24 01:30 am UTC (link)

At a better time and place, Nikolas likely would have been willing to at least hear Daphne out and keep any negative thoughts to himself. While he wasn't quite at the point of disclosing any and every unkind thought that crossed his mind, he was also quickly becoming cranky and somewhat indifferent. As a way of compromising, then, he let out a quick, derisive snort, but almost immediately followed it up with his latest attempt at helpful words.

"Sorry." Throughout their infrequent and short-lived interactions since the beginning of term, Nikolas had found that whenever Daphne got on this topic he became very uncomfortable - he didn't really know what the right way to respond to her predicament was, or if a reaction that would ordinarily go over well with someone else would work with her. He was much more used to, and ready to respond to, people who were straight-forward and didn't carry tons of baggage behind a facade of vanity.

At the core of it, Nikolas felt like he shouldn't be the person Daphne was opening up to like this, even if - especially if - it was because her judgment was probably impaired at the time. To him, it wasn't his place. Or maybe he just didn't want the responsibility, or to feel like it was his. So, though he was still facing her, he made a point of avoiding direct eye contact, which made for an odd effect.

Still, he felt he needed to say something or she'd just keep on going. "What of, then?"

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daphne__g
2009-10-24 02:21 am UTC (link)

"Waking up and realizing that I am utterly alone." She said quietly, eyes remained closed, she found it easier to concentrate on forming words that way. It was also easier to actually form coherent sentences, and she wasn't second guessing what she said. "I mean, I'm sure you're a lovely bloke, Vaisey, don't get me wrong. I just don't feel being forced into a marriage is going to leave either of us happy. I mean, look at us, we're completely trashed and it seems the only way to have a civil conversation." Scoffing, Daphne nuzzled against her arm slightly, shifting on the stone floor.

"That's partially my fault, too, like I have said, I'm not the easiest person to get along with, that's probably why mother and father feel it necessary to arrange something like this." Her voice was lowering, like she was half drifting off to sleep as she spoke. "I just don't want to hinder you, I guess, it's not fair to you to marry a prat like me. I'm not.... wife material, I guess. I'm not Astoria, all poise and fake smiles, and charm." Scoffing, Daphne could feel that weight pressing into her chest, part of her knew it wasn't because she was drunk. That weight was anxiety bearing pressure down on her. Anxiety that she prayed would lift off of her eventually.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry that you have to go through this. And I'm sorry that you're going to be stuck with me." There was a hint of bitterness in her voice, "For what it's worth, Vaisey, I'll try to be a little nicer to you." She was joking around, partially. A tiny genuine smile curled on her lips, that seemed so foreign, and actually made her look more human that any sneer, or smirk. Features weren't darkened by a scowl, instead illuminated slightly by the moon light. Whoa, a genuine smile from Daphne? Even in her drunk state of mind that was something no one ever really got.

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besserwisser
2009-10-24 02:41 am UTC (link)

She had a fair point - it didn't say much for either of them that the first time they'd manage to have a normal conversation at any length was when they were pissed.

"You're not as horrible as you seem to think, you know," Nikolas returned. But for Merlin's sake you need to stop making as though you are. "and it's not your fault, anyway, from what I've seen it's your parents that're the problem. And...good."

That last bit was in response to her reassurance that she'd be a bit nicer - somehow Nikolas couldn't see her wanting very much to go through with that the next day when tonight came into better focus. He expected she'd think she'd made a fool of herself, though he also liked to think that maybe that wouldn't be how she'd feel. He returned her smile, not wanting to discourage her civility, and considered trying to stand up. Comfortable though he had been on the ground at first, there was no denying that stone wasn't a forgiving resting place.

"So...have you given any thought about how we're supposed to get back to the dorms. It's getting to be past supper and only getting later."

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daphne__g
2009-10-24 03:09 am UTC (link)

Daphne was actually shocked by that statement. She wasn't as bad as she thought she was? Here Daphne actually thought she was worse then how she perceived herself. That certainly silenced her. Rolling on her back, she propped herself up on her hands and leaned back slightly.

"I have not." Glancing over at him, she attempted to wipe that smile from her face but failed, "I was actually hoping you had an idea. I could try to apparate, but there's not guarantee I won't splinch... something." Daphne had to actually laugh, maybe just to relieve tension, but she needed to laugh. Bending her knees up just slightly, shoes tapped on the stone ground as she tilted her head up to look at the sky. From up there the moon looked huge, and the stars weren't faded from the lights of the castle.

"We could just... stay here." Daphne didn't look at Nikolas, she was too busy staring at the stars. "I mean, at least until we are positive we can stand on our feet without bumbling around like we're piss drunk. I mean, we are piss drunk, but that doesn't mean we have to walk around the bloody school like we are. Just... stay here until the floor stops tilting and swaying, yeah?"

The action of sitting up actually reminded Daphne that she was drunk, as the floor beneath her hands and bottom began to tilt once more.

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	besserwisser 2009-10-24 03:20 am UTC (link)
	[[OOC: Hey, I'm gonna start a new thread below since these are starting to get kinda scrunched up!]] (Reply to this) (Parent)

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